Baby, I Will Be Your Everything

“This is very good. Thanks for having me over, Mrs. Barakat.”

I stared down into my plate of mashed potatoes, twirling my fork idly as I chewed my mouthful. I swallowed slowly, licking my lips and poking at the small pile of sliced vegetables I pushed towards the edge.

“It’s my pleasure, Derek.” Mom replied, using the over-enthusiastic tone she tends to use around everyone except our family. “I’m sure John would agree.”

“Speaking of, when is Dad gonna be here?” Lauren asked from her seat across from me.

I coughed, feeling my cheeks warm at the feeling of eyes on me while I reached for my glass of water. I cleared my throat, glancing up as I took a sip. My eyes caught Lauren’s and I forced more water into my mouth to avoid confronting her concerned look. I don’t exactly want to discuss any of my feelings about him during her potential boyfriend’s first family dinner with us.

“He should be here any minute.” Mom answered, taking the attention from me. “He was just running a little behind.”

I set the glass back down, dropping my left hand back over my lap while I scooped up another small bite of mashed potatoes.

“Does everything taste okay, Jack?” She questioned, reaching over from my right and touching my forearm. “You’ve hardly touched your plate.”

“It’s good.” I nodded, bringing the bite to my lips. “Mm.”

“No need to over-exaggerate.” Lauren joked, lightly kicking my shin under the table.

I rolled my eyes, pressing my lips together after I swallowed the mushy substance without really chewing. Sighing, I set my fork down and grabbed the napkin from beside my plate.

“I don’t have much of an appetite.” I admitted, wiping my lips.

It fell quiet again, the only sound being the front door opening. I bit the inside of my cheek to avoid the cringe-y face coming on and laid my eyes on Derek instead. He glanced towards Lauren before his eyes fell down to his plate and I felt a hint of a smile graze my lips. If he’s nervous, he’s seriously got a thing for her and knowing that makes me happy. Maybe she found herself her own Alex.

“Hello my lovely family.” Dad greeted loudly, shaking me from my thoughts as his heavy footsteps hit the floor. “And Derek.”

“Hello, Mr. Barakat.” Derek spoke back politely, a slight shake in his voice.

“Hi Daddy.” Lauren smiled, pointing towards the stove. “We left your plate in the microwave.”

“Thanks, Princess.” He said sweetly.

I licked my lips, dropping my eyes back to my plate when I heard him go towards the microwave. Just the tone in his voice compared to last night is enough to have my stomach churning again. How can he act so normal after calling me an idiot and more? Like nothing even happened?

“Hey Jacko.” He called, his plate clinking against the wooden table as he sat down in his seat at the other head of the table. “We’re missing someone?”

I lifted my head, glancing over at him slowly. I froze, swallowing thickly at swelling of his right cheek bone. The first time seeing him since the fight and it looks like Alex isn’t the only one with bruises. Guilt ran through me for a split second, but quickly faded when I thought back to the purple-blue tones taking over Alex’s face much worse.

“Alex isn’t feeling well.” Mom chimed in, touching my forearm again.

Nervous butterflies swam around my stomach at the mention of Alex mixed with the thought of getting questioned about his sudden sickness. Even thinking about how I had to confiscate his medications made me feel nauseous and not knowing what he’s doing up in my room right now is nerve-wrecking. I can’t tell for sure if he told me the truth about the Xanax because I know he was trying to take them to get high. I’m just not sure if his body will react the way he wanted it to and if he did get high off of it, the symptoms are going to be so much worse when it wears off.

“Oh.” He replied, clearing his throat before looking back to me. “I hope he feels better.”

I stared at him for another few seconds, fighting the words wanting to roll off of my tongue. The silence taking over made my shoulders tense and I forced myself to swallow my comments. The last thing I want to do is make everyone else just as tense and I can sense the awkwardness practically radiating off of Derek’s face from where he continued eating slowly beside Lauren.

“Me too.” I finally forced out, putting my attention back to my fork.

I picked it up, stabbing a piece of chopped steak and shoving it into my mouth for a distraction.

“Did it go well today?” He continued, clearly not getting that I don’t want to talk to him. “How about showing me those baby pictures?”

I swallowed, choking on a small chunk of meat lodged into my throat from the sudden action. I coughed harshly, feeling my cheeks flame while my fork fell from between my fingers. I covered my mouth, unable to control the heat still rushing to my face from the shock filling me.

“Jonathan” Mom scolded, patting my back. “Drink some water, Jack.”

I closed my eyes, embarrassment filling me as I grabbed my glass. I brought it to my lips, forcing a mouthful of ice water into my mouth. I swallowed hard, successfully clearing my airway and gasping much needed breaths in.

“What?” He chuckled, ignoring Derek completely as he shrugged. “Don’t I deserve to see the photos of my first grandchild?”

I set my glass down, pressing my hands over my burning cheeks that no doubt looked like beets. Sucking in another deep breath, I looked up to Lauren and matched her wide eyes before I flickered my gaze to Derek nervously. His lips parted wide while he stared over at Lauren dumbly and I felt myself instantly perk up before he could speak.

“She’s not pregnant.” I blurted, shooting a glare over to Dad as he took a small bite of potatoes. “You couldn’t fucking wait until after you had me alone? You can’t just announce that! Way to ruin Lauren’s date.”

“Jack Bassam.” Mom gasped in surprise.

“That’s no way to talk to your father.” He reprimanded, raising his eyebrows at me. “I didn’t ruin anything for her-”

“The way you talked to me last night was no way to talk to your son.” I snapped, feeling the familiar burning behind my eyes tingle. “And you’re probably making Derek not want to talk to her anymore because our family isn’t normal.”

“Jack. John. Now is not the time for this discussion.” Mom warned, waving her hand in front of my face. “We’re our kind of normal, okay?”

I closed my mouth, looking towards her fingers when black caught the corners of my eyes. I rolled my lips together and reached out to take the pictures she somehow had in her grip. I bit my lip, feeling my vision blur a little more when the grey blob in the middle of the black circle outlined into the shape of a baby.

“Yeah, Jack. We are normal.” Lauren stated loudly, breaking the uncomfortable silence. “This is a great way to introduce Derek to the craziness of our family, by the way.”

“I’m sorry.” I sniffled, setting the picture on the table and sliding it down to Dad. “I hope he’s not weirded out.”

I breathed in, wiping the corners of my eyes and taking another sip of my cold water. Once I swallowed it and took a second, the tears faded and I felt okay enough to look Derek in his confused eyes.

“No, really. It’s a good thing. He was gonna find out eventually right? So, there’s this mutation thing that my brother got born with because my dad and his dad both have it and it’s a dominant trait in our family. Basically, my grandpa birthed my dad and now my brother is having my niece or nephew.” Lauren explained bluntly, shooting me a reassuring smile. “It probably sounds weird because it’s rare, but sometimes things get a little messed up and my family genetics are one of those things. We wouldn’t be here if it didn’t happen and Jack wouldn’t be so blessed.”

“That’s right.” Mom agreed instantly, clapping her hands together. “Well, now that we’ve got that out of the way…who wants desert? I have ice cream or apple pie I could heat up.”

I gulped, taking in Derek’s indifferent shrug before looking back to Dad. He held the ultrasound picture up to his face, a wide smile taking over his face. I crossed my arms over my stomach, my forearms grazing the warm skin exposed while a lighter swarm of butterflies burst inside of me.

“I’ll take my pie with a side of vanilla ice cream.” He decided, looking up from the picture.

I blinked slowly, biting my quivering lip at the glint in his eyes and hating the intense burning building behind my eyes again when he shot me a warm smile.

“Me too.” Lauren chimed in.

“I could eat some pie.” Derek commented, taking my blurring gaze over to his own wide smile. “And I’m sure the baby would like some pie. If you’re an apple kinda guy.”

And just like that, everything felt pretty normal.
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I breathed in deeply through my nose, barely awake as I nuzzled more into my pillow. I scrunched my face, painfully prying my right eye open when I felt my cheek glide over the warmth. I sucked in a yawn, grimacing at weird hint of salt on my tongue. Humming, I pulled my hand from where it got tangled in the blanket and forced my other eye open to see darkness. I blinked slowly, trying to get passed the stinging in my eyes while my left hand flopped behind my back to grab my phone from where I left it pressed into the wall.

“Mm.” I mumbled, turning more on my back after I successfully grabbed it.

I gasped, grimacing at the wet feeling under my right arm and immediately lifting it to hold my phone up with both hands. Squinting, I unlocked the screen and hissed at the brightness. I blinked hard, ignoring the slight watering in the corners of my eyes while I stared at the three numbers across the top. I frowned, re-reading the numbers two more times before the screen went dark again. Why am I up at three thirty-five in the morning?

I closed my eyes, feeling my bladder throb barely a second later. With a heavy sigh, I carefully rolled back on my right side and used my arm to push myself up. I slipped, shooting my eyes open from the shock when my forearm slammed into Alex’s back. I gasped, grimacing at the sticky feeling along the side of my arm once I sat up all the way. Unlocking my phone, I turned the screen towards him and felt my heart skip at darkness in the sheets underneath him.

“Alex.” I whispered, flipping the blanket over him and pushing it over the edge.

I heard the light thud of it hitting the carpet and rubbed at my sore eyes before I slowly maneuvered myself over his body and onto the floor. Once my feet pressed into the warmth of the comforter, I opened my settings and clicked the flashlight on.

“Baby.” I frowned, shining the bright light over him.

I licked my dry lips, looking towards his face to see him staring straight ahead. I swallowed thickly, an uneasy feeling growing in the pit of my stomach at the slump of his body. I bent down, running my right hand along his side. I held in my grimace, feeling my hand slide from all of the sweat coating his body. Pulling away, I wiped my palm over my thigh and shined the light over his grey sweats.

“We need to take your pants off, baby.” I whispered, taking note of the dark patches forming over his lower thighs and knees.

I bit my lip when he kept quiet, slowly moving to set my phone face down on the nightstand. The flashlight lit up most of the room, making it easier for me to actually see as I hovered back over him. I released my lip, watching his blank face as I let my fingers ghost over the dark waistband of the joggers.

“I’m gonna take these off now.” I announced softly, slipping my fingers in between his hip and the band. “Can you lift up for me?”

I sighed, using my left hand to dig in the front of the waistband when he didn’t respond. Pressing my lips together, I held my breath and pulled roughly. They slipped a little down his hips, making me pull harder. I bit my cheek, letting the breath free when the damp material slid down his legs relatively easy. I yanked them off his ankles, tossing them in the corner by the hamper before my gaze lifted back to his hips. Panting slightly, I brushed my hair out of my face and decided it’s best to ignore the dampness in his boxers for now.

“Are you okay?” I asked hesitantly, pressing my left hand in the edge of the mattress while I leaned over his head. “You’re really warm.”

I raised my right hand to his forehead, gently brushing his soaking hair off of his forehead. Rolling my lips in, I swiped the back of my hand over his forehead and stood back up to rub the wetness off along the side of my pajama pants. Sighing, I tried to keep myself from getting frustrated and focused back on his face.

“Are you gonna puke?” I continued, keeping my voice soft when I saw the spit spilling out the corner of his parted lips. “Alex.”

I clenched my fists, leaning back to the nightstand. I swiped my phone back up from the nightstand and turned the light towards the closed door, making sure to watch my step until I got to it. Twisting the knob quietly, I pulled the door halfway open to avoid the creaking and carefully slipped out quietly. Blinking tiredly, I hurried down the hall and into the bathroom. Shining the flashlight towards the wall, I made my way over to the toilet and awkwardly used my free hand to poke myself through my boxers and pajama pants.

“Uh.” I moaned lightly, closing my eyes as the pressure in my bladder finally released.

Shaking myself off, I hurriedly tucked myself back in and grabbed the round trashcan from beside the toilet. After hitting the flusher with my wrist, I shined the light back in the hall and walked back to my room at a slightly faster pace. I squeezed back in, almost silently shutting the door before I returned to Alex’s side. I set my phone back on the nightstand and knelt to the floor.

“Please say something.” I whispered, raising my hand to brush his cheek while my left cradled the trashcan over my lap.

“Uh huh.” He muttered, jolting forward.

I jumped, holding the can tightly as I shoved it in front of his face in time for him to gag. I held my breath, forcing my eyes shut just as the sound of liquid hitting the bottom of the empty trashcan filled my ears. I froze, feeling my lungs burn with every second passing as I kept the breath in. He dry-heaved a good five times before I turned my face away and took in some needed air. I cringed in disgust, trying to ignore the way my spit started growing thicker in my mouth while I turned back to him.

“I’m gonna go get you some water.” I informed, watching his face closely to make sure I have time before round two comes. “I’ll be right back.”

He tilted his head back in a barely-there nod and I pushed myself back on my feet and stood up. Pressing my lips together, I grabbed my phone again and easily walked through the room and back out into the hall. I turned down the steps, watching my feet carefully as the dull beam of light lit up the staircase. I got into the foyer, shivering slightly from the cool touch of the smooth floor on my feet as I walked through. I tucked my phone in the band of my boxers, making sure to keep the light flashing as I made my way to the sink.

I pulled the cupboard to my left open and grabbed a glass. Once I closed the door softly, I backtracked over to the fridge and pulled the freezer open. Breathing in deeply, I let it out in a huff and stuck my right hand in the ice bucket. Once I had a small handful, I tilted the glass a bit and dropped them inside quickly. I wiped my cold hand on my pants, closing the freezer and moving back towards the sink. The thick spit piling in my mouth returned as I ran the cold water and held the glass under the thick stream, tears clouding my vision.

“He hates me.” I said, pressing the soft Kleenex underneath my runny nose.

“He doesn’t hate you, Jack. He doesn’t know what he needs right now, baby.” Mom told quietly, tucking me more into arms as she hugged me tighter. “I’m glad you came to me, okay? I was able to ask Linda some discreet questions when we had coffee this morning and the best thing we can do is wait it out.”

“How long?” I sniffled, laying my head on her shoulder.

“It depends on how long he’s been into this.” She sighed, rubbing her hands up and down my back. “She did mention that the worst is over after the first week.”

“It’s been days and there’s no progress.” I admitted, biting my cheek.

“He’ll be okay.” She reassured, pressing a kiss to my head. “He’s a strong kid.”

I gasped, jumping out of my trance when ice cold water ran over my hand. I looked down, catching the glass overflowing majorly. I smacked the handle down, halting the water and leaned forward to sip at the top. I hummed in relief as the cold liquid slid through my dry throat and took in a shaky breath once I swallowed. Grabbing the hand-towel beside me, I wiped the glass off and dabbed over my hand for a few seconds before tossing the towel down and turning back towards the steps.

I sniffled, wiping my cheeks with my free hand and biting my lip to keep myself from going back into the memory. Shaking my head, I clenched my hand around the glass and pressed my right hand over the railing as I climbed up the steps until the railing led into a wall. Once I made it to the top, I strolled back through the hall and into my room. After pushing the door closed, I made my way back to the edge of the bed and set the glass on the nightstand.

“Can you sit up?” I questioned, leaning back over him. “I want you to drink this.”

I closed my eyes for a long second, sucking in a deep breath and opening them to see him in the exact same position. Sighing heavily, I gripped his elbow and gasped.

“Alex, you’re burning up.” I stressed, pulling him as gently as possible. “You need to drink this cold water.”

I let go of his arm, watching it go limp and smack back down over his side.

“Don’t do this.” I frowned, pinching the bridge of my nose when my voice shook. “Don’t fight me.”

I dropped my hands back to my sides, rolling my lips together roughly when he rolled until his face hovered over the edge of the bed. I crossed my arms, watching him lean up only to witness clear liquid spilling from his lips and into the bin I left by his side. I jumped, instinctively leaning forward to run my hand over his back.

“How is there anything left?” I asked myself, keeping my gaze on the back of his head while he gagged loudly.

He let out a strangled cough, spitting a glob leftover in his mouth before he leaned more on his stomach. I grimaced, watching his back glisten in the dull light until my gaze fell to the dark sweat stains taking over almost half of the bed.

“Okay, get up.” I called, shaking my head. “This is disgusting.”

I let out a short huff, letting my eyes search the dark room until I found the towel he used last night next to my feet. I scooped it off of the ground and shook it out, cautiously laying it over his back. I licked my lips, slowly wiping the layer of sweat off before pulling it from him and folding it in half.

“Do you want me to pull you on the ground?” I threatened, raising my eyebrows at the back of his head when he sunk more into the mattress. “I’m so serious, Alex. You’re either going on the floor or this glass of water is going down your ass. Or both.”

“Leave me alone.” He rasped, digging his face into his pillow.

“I’ll leave you alone when you get up and drink this water.” I told, biting my lip at his tone.

I tossed the towel behind me and crossed my arms over my chest, staring down at him until my eyes started burning some more. I squeezed them shut, trying to forget about the tiredness coming back over me as I stood still. Breathing deeply, I opened my eyes and blinked back my shock when I found him sitting up and leaning over his knees.

“Okay.” I nodded, leaning over to grab the water from the nightstand. “Drink this and get up so I can take the sheet off.”

I held the water out to him, keeping my fingers around the rim lightly when his shaking hand gripped the base. I bit my lip, tilting my hand with his until it barely reached his lips.

“I can fucking do it.” He muttered, slapping my wrist away with his right hand.

I pulled my hand to my chest, shaking his attitude off with a shrug before motioning to the floor. He slowly stood up, taking small sips of the water while he moved passed me to lean on the dresser. I dropped my eyes to the bed and shivered in disgust at the state of the light blue sheets. It looks like I dumped a bucket of water out on top, it’s that much sweat. I sighed, grabbing the corner under his pillow and pulling lightly. Once I moved the pillows and had the tops corners pulled off, the rest of the sheet slid off easily.

“Okay, I’ll put a fresh one on tomorrow.” I decided, rolling the dirty sheet up in a ball.

I tossed it towards the corner of the room where the hamper sat, jumping when his hot hand ran up under my t-shirt and over my lower back. I glanced back, looking up to see him looking down at me through his horribly fading bangs. I bit my lip, relaxing at the more comfortable silence between us.

“Let’s get some sleep, yeah?” I suggested quietly, twisting my arm back enough to gently pat the back of his hand with my fingers.

He sniffed, pressing his fingers into my back lightly in response before dropping the contact from me. I gave him a small smile and knelt down on the bed, looking to the nightstand as I crawled back into my spot. Relief filled me at the sight of the empty glass, allowing my gaze to fall back towards Alex while I got comfortable on my right side. He rubbed his nose and scratched his arm a few times before dropping back into the space beside me. I watched him roll on to his stomach and close his eyes before I let myself fully relax back into the mattress.

“I love you.” I whispered, brushing my fingers along his side as I pulled my hands to rest beside my face.
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“Okay, I’m not trying to watch Teen Wolf or anything.” I announced sarcastically, huffing when the TV left my vision for the fifth time since I started the damn show.

I rolled my eyes, staring into the bright white of the back cushions of the couch after getting forced back onto my side. I sighed heavily, feeling the irritation building up under my skin at the feel of Alex’s arms wrapping around my body. He nuzzled his face into the back of my neck, making it ten times harder for me to turn my head let alone move.

“Alex.” I spoke calmly, forcing my arm out from where it got stuck between my chest and the back of the couch. “Alex, seriously.”

I groaned, moving my hand down to his arm slung over my waist before shoving his wrist. He grunted, not stopping his limp arm from moving away for a few seconds only for it to smack right back into my hip.

“I’m trying to watch my show.” I exasperated, pushing my body back hard enough to knock him over the edge of the couch.

“What the fuck?” He grumbled after his body thudded on the floor.

I sat up and twisted my body until my back pressed into the cushion behind me while I crossed my legs in front of me much like I was sitting ten minutes ago before Alex decided to practically crush me.

“What the fuck is right.” I mocked, brushing off the hard glare he sent my way as he got up from the ground. “Let me watch my damn show in peace, okay? I’m not going to just lay around all day because you want me to.”

“Fuck you.” He snapped, storming passed me and over towards the sliding glass door. “I don’t fucking care.”

I bit my lip while my eyes followed his bareback as he stepped out on to the patio. He slid the door shut loudly, digging his hand in the pocket of his black basketball shorts while he stood towards the edge of the cement. I sighed, taking in the way he slouched over for a second in order to light his cigarette before I turned my gaze to where the remote fell on the floor. I leaned down, scooping it up in my right hand and pressing my thumb into the rewind button.

“What are we watching?”

I hit the pause button, looking over towards the doorway at Lauren’s chirpy attitude. My body sunk more into the cushions at the sight of her put-together self before my eyes drifted behind her where Derek followed her. Blinking slowly, I looked away from where they plopped down on the loveseat and turned back towards the TV.

“Teen Wolf.” I answered, turning the volume up a few notches before hitting play.

“Is this the newest episode?” She questioned excitedly. “Like in the beginning?”

“Yeah.” I confirmed, eyeing the opening credits for the second time.

“Doesn’t this show have awful graphics?” Derek jumped in. “At least that’s what I heard.”

“It gets better by the third season.” I commented, smiling at the comfortable atmosphere between us.

“Oh my God, yes!” Lauren exclaimed, tossing her head back. “The whole show gets better with Stiles.”

“Oh yeah, definitely Stiles.” I grinned, feeling my mood lighten considerably at the positive vibes.

Being able to sit here and not feel awkward after Dad spilled the beans at dinner last night makes me feel so good. It feels so good to be accepted as I am, especially by someone that I’m not necessarily close with. It almost makes me feel more confident with myself, like If Derek can wrap his mind around it and be cool with it as well as Lynn and Alex then everyone else that loves me will no doubt accept me. It kind of takes the nerves away from having to tell everyone else eventually. I also can’t deny that it makes me incredibly happy to see Lauren getting so close to this kid. I can see it in her eyes that she really likes him and I can’t help but be reminded of myself after I met Alex.

“I think I might actually cry. Why are they all being jerks?”

I shook out of my thoughts, smiling at Lauren’s commentary before my gaze moved back towards the patio as the door noisily slid open.

“Because it’s the whole point of this season.” I replied, cautiously watching Alex step back inside.

He pulled the door closed behind him and I dropped my gaze to his toned stomach, feeling a little uneasy about looking into his eyes after our last encounter about ten minutes ago. He dug his hand back into his pocket, unintentionally forcing his shorts down enough to expose a good three inches of his pink boxers. I rolled my lips in, barely having time to look over his hip lines before he was walking right passed me.

“Alex, come on.” I called after him, staring into his back dimples until he turned into the kitchen.

I inwardly groaned, relaxing back into the couch as I flickered my gaze back to the TV.

“Do you want to pause it?” Lauren offered quietly.

“It’s fine.” I denied with a shake of my head. “He’s just going to tell me to fuck off.”

“If you say so.” She chuckled, not realizing how serious I am.

I dropped the remote by my knee and sighed, crossing my arms over my chest softly. Staring back into the TV, I studied every detail passing by and listened intently to get back into the world of Scott and his pack. I huffed quietly to myself, unable to really focus on the happenings on the show with the guilt creeping into my gut.

“Wait, what is happening? How did all that stuff just-” Derek rushed out, pausing when Lauren shushed him loudly.

I shook my head, focusing back on the TV to see what he was talking about when the silence from the other room distracted me. I heaved a sigh, untangling my legs from each other and standing up from the couch. I pulled my hoodie back over my hips before my fingers tugged the strings through my purple joggers enough to keep them from slipping down my butt. Ignoring the commotion from the show, I slipped passed Lauren and Derek and made my way into the kitchen. Alex came into my line of sight right away and I felt the guilt grow a little stronger when he slouched over the island silently.

“I’m sorry for snapping…” I started, twiddling my thumbs together as I made my way over to him. “You were smothering me.”

I got around the island and put my forearms over the countertop, biting at my lip as my eyes met his. His stare pierced into my soul and my heart skipped a few beats at the way the usual sparkle was missing. I bit my lip harder, breaking our eye contact when a light tapping met my ears. I looked down out of instinct and felt a wince graze my lips when I found his shaking hands causing the annoying sound as they collided with the hard countertop.

“Babe.” I frowned, reaching forward to grab his hands softly.

“I can’t stop.” He muttered, the tremors of his hands causing mine to quake.

“You need to eat.” I scolded lightly, squeezing his hands.

“No.” He refused shortly.

“I didn’t ask.” I rebutted, raising my eyebrows at his scowl. “I’m serious, Alex. Starving yourself as some kind of protest or whatever is not helping you.”

“I’m not fucking starving.” He spoke through clenched teeth. “I feel fucking sick.”

“You feel sick because you haven’t eaten in two or maybe even three days. I don’t know when you actually ate last.” I informed, dropping his hands back on the counter. “All I know is that you’ve had that nasty shit in your veins for too long and now you don’t want to do anything but get more.”

“You don’t know shit.” He hissed, clinking his teeth together. “I’m fucking disgusted with myself, Jack.”

I bit my tongue, choosing to nod my head and turn away from him before I let any words slip out without a thought. The last thing I need is to be angry with him and let all of the mean things clouding my mind pour out of my mouth. Yelling at him and letting him know how wrong and stupid his decisions were got proven to make everything worse before and I’m really not trying to make this harder than it already is. It’s a miracle that no one has noticed the change in his behavior yet, but then again this is only the second day. It’s bound to get worse by tomorrow unless he really didn’t use much the times he relapsed.

“I don’t want that.”

I snapped out of my thoughts, coming back to reality from Alex’s nasally tone. I blinked down, taking note of the objects in my hands before I slammed the jar of peanut butter on the counter next to the loaf of bread.

“Good because it’s for me.” I replied sharply, pulling the silverware drawer out to grab a butter knife.

I dropped it on the island loudly and went about untwisting the top of the peanut butter, looking over to his unamused face. I ignored the light ping through my chest at the dark bruises and turned my focus back to the loaf of bread once I got the peanut butter open.

“Seriously, I haven’t eaten yet.” I went on, pulling the plastic open and grabbing two slices of the white bread out. “I need to remember to eat more now that I’m pregnant.”

“Hm.” He huffed, leaning more over the island so he could put pressure on his arms.

I rolled my eyes, twisting the bread closed before I picked the knife up and scooped a gob of peanut butter onto it. I maneuvered it onto the closet slice of bread and spread it carefully, humming at the delicious scent shooting up my nose. I repeated the process with the other slice of bread and wiped the access peanut butter off of the knife with my thumb before tossing it into the sink noisily.

“Mm.” I mumbled, sucking my thumb clean.

I stuck the pieces of bread together and took a bite of the corner, sighing in content even when the bread stuck to the roof of my mouth.

“I need you close.” He blurted, stopping abruptly with a sharp sigh. “Can you just.”

I chewed slowly, letting my eyes meet his again when he cut himself off. I licked my sticky lips, feeling my heart swell at the conflicted expression crossing his face.

“I’ll let you be in my space if you share this sandwich with me.” I bribed, taking another small bite.

“Fine.” He agreed, standing up straight.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise, watching him fold his arms over his chest loosely and shake his shaggy hair from his eyes. Swallowing quickly, I let a smile graze my lips before I made my way around him and back towards the family room. I inhaled the delicious sent of peanut butter, taking another bite as I stepped back into the family room while I glance behind me to make sure he followed me. I paused my chewing, slumping my shoulders when I found him still leaning over the island and picking at his fingers.

“Alex.” I called, voice muffled by all of the bread in my mouth.

He dropped his head forward, slouching more over the counter in response. I frowned, backtracking into the kitchen once I finished chewing. Sighing quietly, I stopped behind him and pressed myself against his back. Licking my sticky lips, I reached around and dropped the sandwich on the countertop before looping my arms around his thin waist.

“What are you doing?” He grumbled, making no effort to push me away.

“I’m cuddling you.” I told, nuzzling my face between his shoulder blades. “What happened to sharing the sandwich with me and sitting on the couch?”

“I dunno.” He mumbled.

I ran my hands over his hips, pushing my fingertips into the hard skin briefly before slipping them into the waistband of his shorts. Sighing, I pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades and continued running my fingers along his sensitive skin.

“Your fingers go down any further and you’re gonna have a problem.” He warned as I slipped my hands more into his pants.

“Relax, I’m trying to sooth you.” I explained, rubbing my fingers in circles back and forth across his waist.

“Touching me like this isn’t soothing.” He retorted, standing up straight.

I bit my lip, the sudden movement forcing my hands over his bulge enough for him to tense up.

“Jack.” He hissed, pulling my wrists until my hands ended up back over his stomach. “Fuckin’ hell.”

“Well you’ve certainly never complained about that before.” I noted, locking my fingers together above his belly button.

“Your fucking sister and her boyfriend are five feet away from us and you’re tryin’ to grab on my dick.” He reasoned, pulling my hands apart in order to turn around and face me. “Sorry I’m a little uncomfortable with that.”

“I wasn’t trying to grab on your dick.” I scoffed, rolling my eyes as I crossed my arms over my chest. “And they’re at least twenty feet away, in a completely different room.”

“Different room or not, when I look over I can see them.” He pointed out, raising his eyebrow.

“Point is, I was trying to make you relax.” I reminded, uncrossing my arms and pressing my palms flat on his chest. “Seriously. You’d know if I was trying to be sexy or something.”

“Oh, I would?” He teased, holding his hands over mine lightly.

I gawked, playfully smacking his chest the best I could with his hand over mine. I rolled my eyes, smiling at the hint of a smirk slipping over his face. He blinked down at me and I felt my heart swell at the familiar sparkle back in his eyes.

“You would.” I confirmed, nodding my head.

I sighed, leaning forward to press my face into his neck and breath him in. The familiar scent of axe filled my senses and I relaxed more against him. I smiled to myself, feeling his arms wrap around my waist while I kept my hands pressed into his chest.

“You uh.” He started quietly, stopping himself.

“I what?” I questioned, moving my head back to look at him.

“You distracted me from the itch for a minute.” He admitted, sniffing lightly.

I mentally patted myself on the back, feeling his arms tighten around my hips when a wide smile crossed my face. Distracting him from the feelings he’s going through on the second day is one of the best things that could happen. He just gave me a sign that this time around is already going to go by way easier than the first.

“Well, why don’t I go distract you some more?” I suggested, wiggling my eyebrows. “With a mouthful of peanut butter and Teen Wolf.”

He rolled his eyes, pushing me back slightly with a shrug.

“Lead the way.”

Notes

Sorry for the wait my lovelies!! This is just a filler about Jack sort of confronting his dad and a peek into Alex's attitude during beginning withdrawals. Sorry if it came out a little short, but I decided to cut out some details of the withdrawal process. I also tried for a bit of cutesy jalex moments towards the end!

Anyways, I hope y'all enjoyed the chapter and thanks for all the lovely comments! Next chapter will probably still have some moody Alex, but it will definitely be the start of everything going back to normal :D

Also, if y'all made it this far....I STARTED A NEW JALEX.

I know I have a lot of stories going on, but I get so inspired for different things that I can't put in the same story and I can't help myself! LOL.

Anyways, its my first trans fic and I love the concept I came up with. If y'all are fans of MTF trans Jack, then I suggest yous check it out!! It's called The Story of Us and I can't wait to get that one rolling as well as this one!

Okay okay I'm done. Until next time!!