Alex


“But Kellin,” I whined, pressing my phone up to my ear with my shoulder as I struggled to get books out of my locker.

“I know babe, I’m sorry, I think I caught the flu or something. It was really all of a sudden.” he told me, sounding worn out and tired, and he was talking with a little bit of a lisp, which was weird.

I didn’t see him nearly all day yesterday, and now he’s staying home from school because he was so sick. I felt horrible for him, all I wanted to do was cuddle up next to him and watch a movie but I don’t know if he was too sick for that.

I really needed him with me at school with me, I’ve been getting pretty anxious lately because we’ve been so open about our relationship. I thought we were going to start off by only giving each other little pecks at school, but he insisted on making out with me and told me nobody would care. I have no idea if Jack knows or not, I shouldn’t be so concerned about his opinion but of course I am.

I don’t know what I was expecting. He’s obviously not going to be supportive of me dating Kellin, especially because it’s one of his friends. My emotions are just all over the place lately.

I miss Jack a lot and I can’t stop thinking about him, but also I hate him for how he hurt me, but I can understand what he was trying to do when he was lying to me, but he kissed Tay afterwards.
I’ve been so conflicted but Kellin really gets my mind off of him, and helps me feel better.

“That’s horrible. I know this might be a little insensitive but… Are you going to be better by this weekend? I really wanna see you.” I bit my lip, anxiously waiting for a response.

“No, I don’t think so. I need time to heal.. Uh… I mean g-get better. You get what I mean. My head hurts.” he told me in a groggy voice, making me laugh a little.

“I’m so sorry, do you think I gave it to you? Oh god, wait, what if I get it? I’ve never had the flu before Kellin. I heard that people die from it, please don’t die. Oh my god-”

“Alex! Shh, babe calm down! You’re gonna be fine, I doubt I passed it onto you. Anyway, I was just using the flu as an example, I might not have it. I think I’m just sick and need a few days to lay and bed and stuff. Don’t worry about a thing.” Kellin assured me sweetly, calming me down instantly.

I don’t know how he had that effect on me but he does. The only other person that can do that is Jack.
No! Don’t compare them! Ugh, focus on Kellin, not Jack.

“I wanna see you, babe. Are you too sick for me to visit you? I could bring you soup, or ice cream, or anything really.” I offered, attempting to shove my binder in my backpack with one hand.

“No! No, sorry, I’m too sick for that. I wouldn’t want to risk getting you sick.” he told me, and I sighed with disappointment before I noticed something.

“Babe, why are you talking with a lisp? Is your lip okay?” I questioned, at the same time I looked up and saw the person I was missing and avoiding at the same time, Jack.

Oh no.

He leaned against the locker bed, looking at me expectantly, like I would hang up the phone just because of his presence. I cocked my head at him in confusion, pinching my eyebrows together.

“Uh, it’s just my throat, I think.” Kellin responded slowly.

“You’re throat? I thought your stomach was hurting?” I questioned him, now I was really confused.

“Is that Kellin?” Jack asked me, making me look back up at those big brown eyes that made my heart melt.

Is it bad how much I miss him?

“Yeah, why?” I responded, holding the phone away from my mouth so Kellin couldn’t hear me.

Jack reached out and took my phone from my hands, and pressed the red button on the screen that said hang up.

“Jack!!” I scolded as he placed the phone back in my hand, he just gave me a shameless smile and shrugged his shoulders.

“I gotta talk to you, baby.”

“I wasn’t kidding when I told you to stop calling me that.” I grumbled, and he shook his head.
I knew he wouldn’t listen to me.

“What do you want from me, anyway?” I questioned him, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring up at him. I hated the way that he looked at me.
The look he gives me when I’m trying to be serious and stern and he just gazed at me like he was imagining me naked or something. It’s fucking annoying, and it’s annoying that it’s super flattering and it makes me blush.

I don’t want to blush in front of him.
I don’t want him to know he still drives me crazy just by looking at me.

“I want you to stay away from Kellin,” he said simply, staring at my comfy but form fitting long sleeve t shirt with buttons in the middle going about a quarter the way down.

I left a few buttons undone because I thought it looked nice but apparently Jack didn’t.
He reached out and started putting the top buttons into their correct holes until only one button was undone.
I stared at him with wide eyes, trying to remember what he had just said but I was too distracted by him touching me.

“W-Wait, what?” I stumbled out, and blushed as he chuckled lightly at how much he affected me.

“Stay away from Kellin,” he repeated, reaching a hand out to place on my arm, lightly squeezing my bicep. Ugh, would he stop touching me?

“I’m not gonna do that,” I responded with narrowed eyes.

“Baby, as your-”

“Alex.” I corrected him, watching him roll his eyes and scoff, giving me an ‘are you kidding me,’ look.

“I’m serious!” I exclaimed, raising my eyebrows at him.

“Fine, okay! Alex, as your ex boyfriend, who you dated for 5 months, do not fucking date Kellin Quinn.” he told me seriously, and shrugged off the hand he had on my arm even though I liked it there.

Was Jack being jealous? This was a whole different side of him that I’ve rarely seen, because it’s usually me getting jealous of all his ex’s.
Even though jealousy was an ugly emotion, it felt good that he was missing me too.

“Um, I don’t I need any relationship advice from my ex boyfriend who is a pathological liar.” I glared at him, he sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“Yeah, you’re only ex boyfriend. Meaning that I was the fucking first, the first to hold your hand, the first to kiss you, the one who took your virginity-”

“Okay! I get it!” I stopped him there.

“Lex, as your first love, the person who knows you better than anyone else, I’m telling you, stay the hell away from Kellin Quinn. I’m serious.” he told me seriously.
He acted like Kellin was planning to kill me or something.

I was about to believe Jack.
I was about to agree, and say I’d never talk to Kellin again.
I was about to wrap my arms around him, admit that I’ve been missing him terribly, and tell him how much I love him.

But then I remembered.

“No.”

“No?” Jack repeated, shocked that I had an opinion that was different from his.

“You have no fucking authority over me Jack! You don’t get a say in my love life!” I defended myself.

“I am your love life, Alex!” he stared at me with wide eyes.

“Not since the day you cheated on me.” I huffed, he shook his head and lifted his hands up in surrender.

“I’m just trying to protect you, I always am Alex. I don’t care if we’re together or not, I will always protect you. He’s gonna hurt you.” he told me like he could predict the future, I rolled my eyes once I realized who I was talking to.

“Nobody can hurt me more than you already did,” I admitted, watching his gaze drop to the floor.

I felt awkward when he didn’t respond, and looked down. I pulled my sleeves up to cover my hands and nervously tugged on the edges of the soft fabric.

Jack mumbled something that I didn’t hear and I looked up at him.

“What?” I asked quietly.

“You’re still wearing my shirt.” he looked up at me with his signature cocky smile.

I looked down at the navy blue, long sleeve henley shirt that hugged my torso. I gazed at the white buttons, the black thread holding it together, and couldn’t remember this shirt ever being Jack’s.

“This is my shirt.” I corrected him, but he shook his head.

“Thought you’d notice once I fixed the buttons. You’re still wearing my clothes and you don’t even realize it-”

“This is my shirt!” I repeated, confused on how he would ever think it was his, he smiled at my defensive reaction.
It didn’t even look like something he would wear!

“Babe, that’s why the sleeves are so long, and why it’s tight on your upper arms. Do you remember buying it at the store?” he tugged lightly on the edge of the sleeve that hid my hands.

I tried to think back of where I first got this shirt. I saw it in my closet and I just put it on. I’ve seen it plenty of times in there so I just assumed it was mine, maybe it could’ve been Tom’s and it doesn’t fit him anymore or something. There was no way this was Jack’s.

Right after I convinced myself there was no way this was ever Jack’s shirt, the memory popped into my head.


“Baby, hurry up. I’m hungry!” Jack whined from his bed, making me laugh.

I was bouncing up and down on my toes with excitement as I went through Jack’s closet. He was taking me out on a surprise date tonight, just because he wanted to treat me to dinner. I had no idea where he was planning on taking me, and I wanted to look nice for him.

If he had told me ahead of time, and warned me about this surprise, I could’ve worn something nicer when he picked me up from my house while I was only wearing sweatpants and a t shirt.
I just expected us to lay around, have sex, and watch movies like usual but I guess he was feeling spontaneous.

I pushed back hangers and searched for the perfect shirt to wear, imagining the shirts that were hung up on Jack’s body and making me smile to myself. I skipped a bunch of plain v necks and monochrome colored shirts until I came across one I liked.
Not to wear to a date, of coarse, but just in general.

“Ooh! Why don’t you ever wear this?” I called to him, pulling out a long sleeve, navy blue henley shirt.

“Donno whatcha talking about, I can’t see it!” Jack called back from the bedroom. I mentally smacked myself and walked up to the doorway that led into Jack’s room. He was laying on his bed on his back, holding his phone above his head as he swiped through it.

“This babe,” I told him, holding it out for him to see.

“Oh, I don’t know why I don’t wear it. I think Hayley gave it to me as a Christmas gift last year or something.” he shrugged.

“You’d look cute in it.” I told him, imagining Jack wearing it and smiling.

“Bet you’d look better.” he responded.

“Nah, you look good in dark blue. It brings out your eyes.” I insisted, leaning against the doorframe.

“Ugh, baby, I can tell how badly you want it, just put it on.” Jack told me with a laugh, I smiled because he knew me too well.

“I love you.” I giggled, walking back into the closet and ripping off my t shirt.

“Love you too, and lemme see what it looks like on you!” he called, I chuckled at how impatient he was.

“Hold on,” I said, and pushed my arms through the sleeves.

I was instantly comforted by the soft material and walked into the bedroom, watching Jack’s head look up from his phone, making him turn it off and toss it a few inches away from him.

“HOT DAMN, my boyfriend is sexy!” he exclaimed, sitting up and leaning on the headboard of the bed.

I turned around and looked at myself in the mirror, laughing when I saw my full outfit.

“I like the shirt, but it's not like I can wear this to on our date.” I said.

“Why not?” Jack tilted his head in confusion, like a puppy.

“You’re kidding right?” I scoffed.

“Uh no,” he responded honestly.

“Well first of all, I’m wearing sweatpants, and this shirt isn’t dressy enough for a date!” I exclaimed, throwing my arms up in the arm with frustration. I don’t understand him at all.

“I don’t care babe!” he insisted.

“Of course you do,” I argued, watching him shake his head and sigh.

“No I don’t, come here.” he patted his lap signalling for me to come sit with him.

I huffed out an annoyed breath and climbed onto the bed, crawling over to him and plopping down in his lap, smiling lightly when he immediately wrapped his arms around my lower back and pulling me closer, placing a kiss on my cheek. I lifted my arms to wrap them comfortably around his neck, and stared into his light brown eyes.

“Alex, I don’t give a shit about what you wear. Not that I don’t appreciate you looking nice for me, but you don’t need to, baby. Stop trying to hard all the time, I’d prefer you to wear nothing all the time but that’s not how it works. I love you the same no matter what, and I think you’re just as beautiful now as you would be in a tuxedo. I’d be perfectly fine with you wearing these sweatpants, and that shirt, especially since they are both mine, on our date tonight.If you want to get dressed up that’s fine, as long as it’s for you, and not for me. You don’t have to try to impress me because you do it so damn well without trying.” he told me sweetly, and pressed his forehead to mine.

I couldn’t keep a smile off my blushing red face, I felt close to tears because he’s just so kind.

“I love you so much,” I mumbled and pressed my lips hard against his.

Jack chuckled lightly and kissed me back, his arms tightening around my waist to pull me even closer. I hummed, feeling my bottom lip slip in between his as we kissed. I pushed my lips hard into him and I felt the same pressure returned, I choked out a moan when Jack slid his arms up and down my legs and squeezed the back of my thighs.

“Love you more,” he breathed, pressing light kiss on my jawline, and another peck on my lips.

“Now I guess I have to wear this,” I giggled, looking down at my lazy outfit that I once felt gross in, but Jack made me feel beautiful.

“Good, cuz your ass looks fucking fantastic in those sweatpants, and my shirt looks great on you.” he complimented, running one of his hands down my chest.

“Babeeee… Can I keep the shirt?” I asked him giggling, leaning into him more.

“Of coarse baby. Anything you want is yours.” Jack laughed, and kissed my cheek.

“I want you.” I stated honestly, attaching my lips to his for a few seconds.

“You already got that, so…” Jack shrugged trying to make me laugh, which he did.

I gasped as he flipped me over and connected our lips, I had to force myself to stop laughing but I managed to with butterflies still floating around my stomach like crazy.


Oh god, of course this would happen!
Of course I would wear one of his shirts, and he would notice. I can’t believe I didn’t recognize this as one of his shirts, I’m so stupid!

“I didn’t mean to wear it.” I defended myself and Jack cocked an eyebrow at me.

“Did the shirt force you to put it on?” he chuckled, making me smile but I shoved him for being annoying.

“I wouldn’t have put it on if I knew it was yours.” I said more specifically.

“Why not?” Jack asked.

My heart skipped a beat and I quickly looked down at my feet, unable to make eye contact with Jack because my face was beet red. He could just say something and make me completely speechless. I hate how much control he has over my emotions.

This has to be over. None of this can happen.

I can’t be thinking about Jack while I’m dating Kellin.

“Just move on Jack… We weren’t a good couple, we aren’t good together.”

I gasped as Jack pushed my back against a locker with one arm leaned up on the locker by my head and the other firmly gripping my hip. Nerves and excitement filled my stomach like butterflies as his face got closer to mine, I hated that I was begging him to kiss me in my mind.

“Fucking says who.”

As he got closer to me I tried to recognize what I smelled on Jack’s jacket. It was a lot different than his normal smell, and I didn’t like it at all. Once I realized what it was I looked up at Jack with wide, scared eyes and watched his face fill with concern.

“Since when do you smoke cigarettes?” I asked quietly, tracing my fingers lightly on the zipper of his leather jacket.

“Since the day I lost you.” he told me honestly, guilt filled my body making me feel sick.
I shook my head rapidly, not wanting to believe that Jack would start doing such a terrible thing to himself because we broke up. He can’t start smoking, what would happen to him?

What if he gets lung cancer?!?! What if he dies?!
I can’t live in a world where Jack isn’t alive in it, I couldn’t breathe knowing that Jack wasn’t anymore.
How could he do this to himself?

My mind was racing with anxious thoughts and I felt a finger hooked under my chin, which made me look up at Jack who was staring lovingly down at me.

“Don’t worry about it baby, it’s under control.” he promised, I huffed out a frustrated breath and jerked my head away from his hand.

“We aren’t good together! You’re a bad boy, you go to parties, get detention, drink and smoke cigarettes! I’m not like that! I’m... “ I trailed off, trying to think of a positive quality of mine but that would take a little bit.

“You’re perfect, Alex.” Jack told me sweetly, I shook my head because that wasn’t the word I was looking for.

“I’m a good person! I I think deserve a good person to date!” I insisted, and Jack scoffed.

“Yeah of course you do, and you seriously think that Kellin is that guy?” he asked..

“Yes! He’s sweet to everybody, and he goes to class, and he doesn’t drink as much as you-”

“Alex… Jesus fucking Christ, you actually know absolutely nothing about him. How did you just jump into a relationship with someone you don’t even know?!” he asked me, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“You don’t get him.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“You’re being so fucking naive right now. You have no idea what you’re getting into, Lex-”

“I don’t know why I’m even explaining myself to you!” I exclaimed loudly, rolling my eyes.

“Because you love me, Alex.” he answered for me, I sighed and shook my head.

“You can’t tell me that you don’t love me anymore baby, I know it’s a lie so don’t bother.” Jack went on, squeezing my hip in his hand and staring at me patiently.

“I never said I wasn’t still in love with you, I just don’t want to be.” I answered honestly, and Jack sighed and leaned in closer to me.

“Be with me again, Alex. I can make you want to love me again, I promise.” he mumbled, I shook my head rapidly and he let out a frustrated sigh.

Notes

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

okay
oH MY GOD

i needed that
i really really really needed that
i'm sure you guys did too

ughhhh why is jack such a good boyfriend
like besides the cheating and lying part
but HE'S A BETTER BOYFRIEND TO ALEX WHEN THEY ARE BROKEN UP THEN KELLIN EVER WILL BE
AAA

IN THAT FLASHBACK
FUCK

I GAVE U GUYS SOME JALEX TO HOLD ON TO
AND AS AN APOLOGY FOR HOW DEPRESSING THIS STORY IS
I GAVE SOME HAPPY

i have a whole other half of this chapter and i was just about to spoil it woops
but THIS CHAPTER IS INSANELY LONG ENOUGH
SO IM GONNA POST THE OTHER HALF RN

AAAAA


this is the shirt that Alex is wearing that is actually Jack's AHHHH THEY SO CUTE

I'VE MISSED JALEX GIFS



title credit- Oh Calamity