Guardian Angel
2//Smoke And Mirrors
Quiet as I watch you falling
You become the prey again
I can see your skin is crawling
Lipstick cases and sins
~~~~~~~~~
Alex fell asleep later that morning. His parents and siblings were growing ever more concerned of him as each day passed, although the rest of his family brushed it off as simple grief. To be honest, I had never seen someone grieve that terribly before. It was as if Alex were a completely different person. Usually, he'd wake up at around 6 in the morning, but since I had died, that was the time he'd fall asleep by. Usually, he'd be back home in time for each meal of the day, but since my passing he barely ate anything. Usually, he'd be the loudest person you'd ever meet, bursting with enthusiasm. But lately he no longer talked. And if he did, his response would be short and quiet, lacking in detail.
I had no idea that an emotion had enough power to completely change someone's personality. Alex no longer worked for the village, his family or for himself. He spent most of his time sitting on the rocks near the lake, pondering in silence. What he pondered of, I had no idea. Sadly, I suppose one of my ghost powers wasn't reading minds, although I wish it had been.
I was sitting beside Alex on the rocks that overlooked the lake. He was picking at the skin around his fingernails, and yet he didn't seem bored or to be in deep thought. He looked simply unoccupied; blunt, even. I had tried several times that day to communicate with him again, but as usual there was no reaction from him. My head was laying on his shoulder as I stared off into the clean water of the lake.
Suddenly, a slight shifting noise could be heard in the bushes behind us. Alex payed no attention to it, and neither did I at first as I thought it was the wind. But the noise didn't stop, and now the sound of branches breaking and leaves being crushed under feet was sounding.
Alex jumped as the noise got closer, and looked over to the source of the noise. He put his hand over the pocket knife that was sitting beside him. His grandfather had given him that knife on his 12th birthday. Since we resided in the woods, a simple pocket knife could show itself useful in many situations. And at that point, it was useful for self-defence. Although, we both knew that he probably wouldn't bother using it if whatever, or, whoever didn't pose much of a threat. Perhaps it was just reassurance for Alex, to have something that could easily harm another being.
Suddenly, a dark haired man who looked to be in his early 20's emerged from the bush, just a few feet away from us. Abruptly, I remembered the conversation I had with the reaper about needing to protect Alex. Suddenly feeling over-whelmed with a sense of possession, I stood up and walked in front of the lonely boy. Although, my physical barrier would do no good as I was invisible to everyone. However, I still felt as though that maybe I could somehow give the impression not to come closer. But of course, hope was futile at this point.
Alex and I studied the man further. Upon our staring, we found that the man was injured. Whether it was severely or not, I suppose neither of us knew. He was limping rather sadly across the rocks, and was using a stick from the forest ground to help balance himself. Alex immediately felt compelled to stand up and rush over to the man. For the first time in those 5 days, I found myself playfully rolling my eyes at my former lover. He had always been so caring for the physical well-being of others.
"Are you alright, sir?" He asked once he had approached the man.
The man looked up at Alex. Surprised at the sudden presence, he jumped a little, however he quickly regained balance due to the stick. The atmosphere was one of friendliness and care along with a little bit of awkwardness and confusion. However I didn't miss the small predatory look that flashed in the man's eyes. If I hadn't been staring at his face, I probably would've missed it. But since I had seen it, I immediately felt uneasy. I tugged on Alex's arm to urge him to get away. But as always, my presence went unnoticed.
"Oh," the raven haired man gasped, as if he just acknowledged the brown-haired boy standing in front of him "um, yes. I'm alright, I've just sprained my ankle. I was only going to sit on the rocks to rest a little bit before I head home."
Since I didn't trust this man right away, I suspected that he was lying. My mind kept coming up with scenarios, like how maybe the man had seen Alex sitting on the rocks, and grabbed a stick to pretend he was limping and injured to get his attention and lure him somewhere dangerous. But as I looked down at his obviously misshapen ankle, I concluded that he was truthful. However, I was still on alert.
Alex frowned. "Home? Where are you from? You certainly aren't from this village."
The man furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "Village? People live around here?"
"Don't tell him anything." I said to Alex. "Lie to him; he doesn't have to know"
I continued to be ignored. "Here in the forest, sir. My home town is not but a few yards away. We have a Health Home there. We could help you with your ankle."
"Oh, no, I really don't think that's necessary." The man was quick to refuse Alex's offer. "I would hate to be a burden on your people. I think I'll be ok."
"You're using a stick to help yourself stand." Alex laughed harshly. "I'd hardly call that 'ok.'"
The dark haired man looked at Alex's face harder. It was as if his face was an important detail of a task or an article, that he just surely couldn't forget. Perhaps he was only trying to guess how old Alex was, or if he had ever, even in the slightest had seen him before. But it was doubtful the man had ever seen him prior to then. Alex never dared laid foot in the urban land. It was said to be dangerous and unholy; a place where God was missing from the people's hearts.
"What's your name?" The man asked.
"Alexander." The darker skinned boy answered. "And yours, sir?"
The man smiled softly. "Jack."
The small gesture of the man's smile brought upon a similar expression on Alex's face. It was the first time that I had seen him smile since my passing, and I was glad that I had seen it once more. I had almost forgotten what it even looked like by now. However, it was easily recognizable once it was seen. His smile to me was the equivalent of breathing or walking for other people; it's not something you just forgot about. Even when breathing and walking eventually prove to become difficult as years pass or as health becomes an issue, those two things will always be engraved in a person's brain. Just like Alex's smile.
"Can I please help you, Jack?" Alex offered once more. "My town can be of assistance to your ankle. You can't just simply limp your way home. At least let us give you properly carved crutches, and we can bandage up your ankle too."
I could tell that Jack was still unsure. To be frank, I was hoping that he would refuse again, and we could simply move on with our lives. However, that's not what had happened. The man sighed, before offering another shy smile and nodding his head.
"Ok." He agreed. "Lead me the way."
Andy grinned, his enthusiasm now renewing as he grabbed onto Jack's arm, and started helping him towards town.
~~~~~•~~~~~
"Forgive me for mentioning this,"Jack began, as the two males were walking through the trail, "but you look a little... Foreign. Are you an immigrant?"
Alex laughed quietly. "I'm the opposite of foreign. If anything, you as a white person in america, are technically the immigrant. I'm part native." He explained proudly.
The raven haired man gaped. His face showed wonder and interest.
"Really? That explains it, I guess. And yeah, you're right. If anything, I'm the foreigner here." He agreed, and chuckled quietly. He stopped talking suddenly, falling silent. I looked at him questioningly, and he seemed to be in a mental debate with himself.
"Your village, uh..." He started to ask, but trailed off his sentence.
"Yes?" Alex asked.
"Uh, is it... Native land? Or...?"
While Jack seemed to be nothing but socially awkward, Alex was more than happy to answer his questions. He was proud of his race and his ancestry, and no question about his family or his village was really off limits. However, he never talked about his heritage very often, as he had too much pride in it. Pride was considered a deadly sin, and thus not be shown. However, the younger man just couldn't seem to help himself sometimes.
"I don't know." He answered Jack. "Most people are white. My mother is the only pure native there, so I guess not."
Jack nodded in understanding. A silence fell over all of us. I walked cautiously behind them, keeping most of my attention on Jack, and the way he was. I focused on the way he walked, the way he talked, the way he still pushed most of his weight on the stick he was carrying even though Alex was holding his arm. I focused on his physical appearance, how his mental state seemed to be just by listening to him talk. There wasn't a single thing that I did not judge.
Something in the back of my head was demanding for me to stop judging and criticizing the raven haired man. What with living in a very religious community for almost a year, I adopted the beliefs and the catholic lifestyle. And judging another human being was considered a sin. After all, only God was in a position to judge. Yet for whatever reason, I started to feel like I was in that position.
I started playing God.
You become the prey again
I can see your skin is crawling
Lipstick cases and sins
~~~~~~~~~
Alex fell asleep later that morning. His parents and siblings were growing ever more concerned of him as each day passed, although the rest of his family brushed it off as simple grief. To be honest, I had never seen someone grieve that terribly before. It was as if Alex were a completely different person. Usually, he'd wake up at around 6 in the morning, but since I had died, that was the time he'd fall asleep by. Usually, he'd be back home in time for each meal of the day, but since my passing he barely ate anything. Usually, he'd be the loudest person you'd ever meet, bursting with enthusiasm. But lately he no longer talked. And if he did, his response would be short and quiet, lacking in detail.
I had no idea that an emotion had enough power to completely change someone's personality. Alex no longer worked for the village, his family or for himself. He spent most of his time sitting on the rocks near the lake, pondering in silence. What he pondered of, I had no idea. Sadly, I suppose one of my ghost powers wasn't reading minds, although I wish it had been.
I was sitting beside Alex on the rocks that overlooked the lake. He was picking at the skin around his fingernails, and yet he didn't seem bored or to be in deep thought. He looked simply unoccupied; blunt, even. I had tried several times that day to communicate with him again, but as usual there was no reaction from him. My head was laying on his shoulder as I stared off into the clean water of the lake.
Suddenly, a slight shifting noise could be heard in the bushes behind us. Alex payed no attention to it, and neither did I at first as I thought it was the wind. But the noise didn't stop, and now the sound of branches breaking and leaves being crushed under feet was sounding.
Alex jumped as the noise got closer, and looked over to the source of the noise. He put his hand over the pocket knife that was sitting beside him. His grandfather had given him that knife on his 12th birthday. Since we resided in the woods, a simple pocket knife could show itself useful in many situations. And at that point, it was useful for self-defence. Although, we both knew that he probably wouldn't bother using it if whatever, or, whoever didn't pose much of a threat. Perhaps it was just reassurance for Alex, to have something that could easily harm another being.
Suddenly, a dark haired man who looked to be in his early 20's emerged from the bush, just a few feet away from us. Abruptly, I remembered the conversation I had with the reaper about needing to protect Alex. Suddenly feeling over-whelmed with a sense of possession, I stood up and walked in front of the lonely boy. Although, my physical barrier would do no good as I was invisible to everyone. However, I still felt as though that maybe I could somehow give the impression not to come closer. But of course, hope was futile at this point.
Alex and I studied the man further. Upon our staring, we found that the man was injured. Whether it was severely or not, I suppose neither of us knew. He was limping rather sadly across the rocks, and was using a stick from the forest ground to help balance himself. Alex immediately felt compelled to stand up and rush over to the man. For the first time in those 5 days, I found myself playfully rolling my eyes at my former lover. He had always been so caring for the physical well-being of others.
"Are you alright, sir?" He asked once he had approached the man.
The man looked up at Alex. Surprised at the sudden presence, he jumped a little, however he quickly regained balance due to the stick. The atmosphere was one of friendliness and care along with a little bit of awkwardness and confusion. However I didn't miss the small predatory look that flashed in the man's eyes. If I hadn't been staring at his face, I probably would've missed it. But since I had seen it, I immediately felt uneasy. I tugged on Alex's arm to urge him to get away. But as always, my presence went unnoticed.
"Oh," the raven haired man gasped, as if he just acknowledged the brown-haired boy standing in front of him "um, yes. I'm alright, I've just sprained my ankle. I was only going to sit on the rocks to rest a little bit before I head home."
Since I didn't trust this man right away, I suspected that he was lying. My mind kept coming up with scenarios, like how maybe the man had seen Alex sitting on the rocks, and grabbed a stick to pretend he was limping and injured to get his attention and lure him somewhere dangerous. But as I looked down at his obviously misshapen ankle, I concluded that he was truthful. However, I was still on alert.
Alex frowned. "Home? Where are you from? You certainly aren't from this village."
The man furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "Village? People live around here?"
"Don't tell him anything." I said to Alex. "Lie to him; he doesn't have to know"
I continued to be ignored. "Here in the forest, sir. My home town is not but a few yards away. We have a Health Home there. We could help you with your ankle."
"Oh, no, I really don't think that's necessary." The man was quick to refuse Alex's offer. "I would hate to be a burden on your people. I think I'll be ok."
"You're using a stick to help yourself stand." Alex laughed harshly. "I'd hardly call that 'ok.'"
The dark haired man looked at Alex's face harder. It was as if his face was an important detail of a task or an article, that he just surely couldn't forget. Perhaps he was only trying to guess how old Alex was, or if he had ever, even in the slightest had seen him before. But it was doubtful the man had ever seen him prior to then. Alex never dared laid foot in the urban land. It was said to be dangerous and unholy; a place where God was missing from the people's hearts.
"What's your name?" The man asked.
"Alexander." The darker skinned boy answered. "And yours, sir?"
The man smiled softly. "Jack."
The small gesture of the man's smile brought upon a similar expression on Alex's face. It was the first time that I had seen him smile since my passing, and I was glad that I had seen it once more. I had almost forgotten what it even looked like by now. However, it was easily recognizable once it was seen. His smile to me was the equivalent of breathing or walking for other people; it's not something you just forgot about. Even when breathing and walking eventually prove to become difficult as years pass or as health becomes an issue, those two things will always be engraved in a person's brain. Just like Alex's smile.
"Can I please help you, Jack?" Alex offered once more. "My town can be of assistance to your ankle. You can't just simply limp your way home. At least let us give you properly carved crutches, and we can bandage up your ankle too."
I could tell that Jack was still unsure. To be frank, I was hoping that he would refuse again, and we could simply move on with our lives. However, that's not what had happened. The man sighed, before offering another shy smile and nodding his head.
"Ok." He agreed. "Lead me the way."
Andy grinned, his enthusiasm now renewing as he grabbed onto Jack's arm, and started helping him towards town.
~~~~~•~~~~~
"Forgive me for mentioning this,"Jack began, as the two males were walking through the trail, "but you look a little... Foreign. Are you an immigrant?"
Alex laughed quietly. "I'm the opposite of foreign. If anything, you as a white person in america, are technically the immigrant. I'm part native." He explained proudly.
The raven haired man gaped. His face showed wonder and interest.
"Really? That explains it, I guess. And yeah, you're right. If anything, I'm the foreigner here." He agreed, and chuckled quietly. He stopped talking suddenly, falling silent. I looked at him questioningly, and he seemed to be in a mental debate with himself.
"Your village, uh..." He started to ask, but trailed off his sentence.
"Yes?" Alex asked.
"Uh, is it... Native land? Or...?"
While Jack seemed to be nothing but socially awkward, Alex was more than happy to answer his questions. He was proud of his race and his ancestry, and no question about his family or his village was really off limits. However, he never talked about his heritage very often, as he had too much pride in it. Pride was considered a deadly sin, and thus not be shown. However, the younger man just couldn't seem to help himself sometimes.
"I don't know." He answered Jack. "Most people are white. My mother is the only pure native there, so I guess not."
Jack nodded in understanding. A silence fell over all of us. I walked cautiously behind them, keeping most of my attention on Jack, and the way he was. I focused on the way he walked, the way he talked, the way he still pushed most of his weight on the stick he was carrying even though Alex was holding his arm. I focused on his physical appearance, how his mental state seemed to be just by listening to him talk. There wasn't a single thing that I did not judge.
Something in the back of my head was demanding for me to stop judging and criticizing the raven haired man. What with living in a very religious community for almost a year, I adopted the beliefs and the catholic lifestyle. And judging another human being was considered a sin. After all, only God was in a position to judge. Yet for whatever reason, I started to feel like I was in that position.
I started playing God.
Notes
Ok, so to clear a few things up.
Yes, it does say that there are two writers writing this story. However, I would like for you to know that both of them are my accounts. And yes, I am aware that I could've just connected my original account to different websites to log in, but it was 3am when I was having these sort of difficulties.
Another thing: I am fully aware that the real Alex Gaskarth is in fact british and not part native American. However, like I already stated, this story was not originally a fanfiction. I just changed some of the character's names to turn it into one.
Besides all of that, shoutout to that one person who subscribed to this story. I love you since you seem to be the only one showing this story any kind of approval. I hope all of you have a wonderful day, though! Don't forget to leave comment and give me some feedback. It is always greatly appreciated.
