Me Without You

A finger gently trailed up my spine and I shuddered away from the cold touch. I slowly gripped the duvet in my fingers and prepared myself before I yanked it to my side of the bed and burrito rolled myself in it.
“You little shit!” Mike yelled as he reached out to pull me back to him. I buried myself further into my cocoon as Mike tried to unravel me. He resorted to pulling my burrito onto his lap and being content with that. I pressed a quick kiss to his lips.
“Morning.” I laughed as he scowled at me.
“I'm cold now.” He whined as he cuddled me closer to him. I nestled my head against his shoulder and felt his lips make contact with my hair. “You're all mine.” Mike whispered.
“Of course.” I looked up to place a kiss on his lips.
“You promise?” I sighed, I found his need for reassurance annoying, yet I understood where he was coming from. “Forever?” I rolled my eyes at him and rolled off his lap, escaping from the blanket. I stood at the end of the bed and straightened myself out.
“No one can promise forever, Mike.” I sighed as I pulled one of his t-shirts out of a drawer and slipped it on. “It's an awful long time.” Turning before I could see his reaction I headed out the door and for the kitchen. Deep down, I knew that Mike understood why I could never promise him anything. It was why I was so reluctant to see the boys again, even though I lived a short distance from them and had the same friends. The moment I saw Alex I would fall head first into a spiral of still loving him, but also knowing that Mike is the person who was there for me when he was not. Mike was the one who had picked me up when I was still freaking out over even seeing the name All Time Low in a magazine. He brought me down from my panic attacks, kept me safe, yet I would never be able to love him in the same way that I had loved Alex. He had been the first boy I had ever been in love with, and I knew that feeling would never go away, it would always be hiding on the back of my heart, waiting to jump through and tear my life apart when I started to get close to anyone else.
“Hey, chica. Quesadillas?” Vic smiled as he flipped the chicken in the pan.
“You're making quesadillas for breakfast?” I gaped at him as he beamed.
“I was craving!” I laughed as I pulled a couple of glasses out and a bottle of orange juice from the fridge. “Anyway, Mike finally managed to pull you aye?” Vic laughed as I poured his glass.
“That's not funny Victor, you know I'm really unsure about this.” Vic nodded and patted me on the back.
“You'll be fine. Alex has Lisa so when you see him, you can't have him anyway.” I gripped my glass a little tighter at the mention of her name. Cow.
“If I see him you mean.” The kitchen went silent as Vic's face turned red. “Victor...” He ran a hand through his hair and took a sip of his juice.
“You know how you agreed to come on the North American tour we were co-headlining? The one we hadn't found the other band for yet?” I placed my hand on my hip and slammed my glass down on the counter. I raised an eyebrow and dared him to tell me.
“Go on, say it, Fuentes. I'm going to kick. Your. Ass.” I growled.
“Well, the other band may just possibly be All Time Low and we maybe have a tour meeting tomorrow which as a member of the crew for this tour you have to attend.” I stared at Vic wide eyed, how had he not told me this!?
“That's it. I'm pulling out. Find someone else to do your meet and greets.” I took the pan from Vic and tipped the chicken onto the plate and started to warm up the tortillas.
“No! Come on, Jasey. It's only a three month tour and you don't have to spend hardly any time with them.” I shook my head as I checked the softness of the flat bread. “Jase, please, come with us. You promised you'd come on the next tour! Mike will be there to protect you.” I whipped around and glared at Vic.
“I don't need protecting from anything.” Vic sighed and took a bite of a piece of chicken, giving me puppy dog eyes, damn, that was... “Fine! Fine. I'll stay on tour, but I swear to god Vic, if anything goes wrong I will personally blame you and kick your ass.” Mike appeared in the kitchen and wrapped his arms around my waist. “I'll kick yours too.” I grumbled as I flicked the tortillas onto a plate.
“I didn't do anything!” Mike laughed defensively as I started to plate up the food.
“You knew and you didn't tell me, that's what you did.” I took my plate and made my way to the couch where I plopped down next to Vivian.


“I'll meet you at Rian's for the meeting tomorrow, but I have to go mentally prepare myself for this.” I reached up on my toes to give Mike a kiss.
“I know this is going to be difficult.” Mike smiled down at me, kissing me back. “Thank you so much.” I laughed as I walked off towards my car.
“You owe me Fuentes!” I yelled as I slid into the seat and slammed the door shut. I turned the radio up and tore off back down through the San Diego streets to my apartment. I hummed my way up the stairs until I had safely locked myself inside my home. “I would have married you in Vegas, had you given me the chance to say 'I do'.” I belted as I threw my jacket and shoes next to my door. Dancing along to the music in my head. I grabbed a packet of potato chips from the kitchen and pulled my scrapbook from high-school out from under my bed. Talking about tour with the guys had made me nostalgic. I flicked my phone out and put Paramore on softly, lifting the cover of the leather book. Freshman year there were a few pictures of me and my best friends before I met Rian and Jack. Around May the pages became crammed with photographs of me and my two new friends. Alex appeared around the end of the school year, along with Zack. The pages were filled with selfies and candids of me and the boys. Photos I had taken of band practices, me cuddled up on a couch in-between Alex and Zack. I flicked through, watching us get older, the boys hair getting longer, other friends come and go but the five of us staying constant. By their senior year the five of us were standing together smiling, the party after their graduations. Rian, Zack, Me, Alex and Jack. That was the last photo I had of us, the last moment frozen before they ran off to chase their dreams.
“Don't make promises you can't keep, Gaskarth.” I whispered to the photo before I gently shut it and set it down on my desk.
Tomorrow I would have to face them all again. I would have to turn up out of the blue and impose myself back on their lives. As nervous as I was to see them all again, the curiosity to see their reactions to my sudden return was what drove me to actually attend the meeting. I flicked open my wardrobe as the evening sun glared through my bedroom window. If I was going to make a grand re-entrance into their lives, god dammit, I would look hot doing it. I pulled out my pair of red plaid skinny jeans and my cut up Blink-182 muscle tee. I laid the clothes out on my bed with my matte black Doc Martens and leather jacket and smiled to myself. I would grab the attention of every male there, I mean, I don't spend an hour in my home gym almost every day for nothing.
As the light disappeared over the Californian city I finally finished my paper work for the meet and greets of the sold-out shows for the upcoming tour. I crawled under my covers with my laptop and pulled up twitter and Instagram and scrolled through the feed.

“@ptvmike Congrats on your mystery girl ;) Show her to me sometime, I like sharing.”

I stared wide eyed at Jacks tweet to Mike before bursting out laughing. Oh hell, when he finds out he'll be more than willing to share.

“@JackAllTimeLow Oh I guarantee you'll love her :P Tomorrow dude. Tomorrow.”

I chuckled at the fun I knew Mike was having with this. He loved the fact that he had something over the All Time Low boys, even if they didn't know what it was. I flipped the lid of laptop and placed it on my night stand, flicking the lights off. Tomorrow was going to be interesting...

Notes

Hey! This is a longer chapter but I hope you like it! Please comment what you think! I promise things get intresting soon!
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