Guts

“What the fuck Jack!” I screamed at him.
“What Lexy baby?” he somewhat slurred.

No wonder he wanted to watch a movie, so I didn’t have to hear the slur.

“Where the fuck did you get the booze asshole?”
“I have no idea what you are talking about.” He said trying to stand up, but the alcohol had hit him and he stumbled back down on the couch.
“Where the hell is it Jack!” I screamed, standing up and looming over him.

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “ I drank it all. I had it as a *hiccup* backup. I kept it hidden under my bunk.”

I walked to the trashcan and sure enough, there was an empty bottle of Jack Daniels. I grabbed it and opened the bus door and threw it as hard as I could. It shattered somewhere in the darkness. I left the bus and slammed the door. I could hear Jack try and follow me, but it was dark and he was drunk.

I walked in the darkness for a while until I cooled off. I got back on the bus and had a panic attack because I couldn’t find Jack. Did he leave? Did he go get more booze? Just as I was about to leave the bus again, I heard a noise coming from the bunks. I walked back and there was Jack, on my bunk crying.

“Jack?”
“Go away Alex.”
“No. Why are you crying? I’m the one who failed you.”
He laughed at that. “You think you failed me? That’s a joke.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked sitting next to him.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Jack you are going to tell me right now.”
“Fine! You really want to know? You’re the only reason I am still alive! I first started drinking to help with the pain. Then a new pain emerged. I started drinking more to suppress it. I didn’t want it there, but there it was so I drowned it.”
“What new pain Jack?”
“No Alex don’t ask.”
“I am going to ask until you tell me.”
“Alex just drop it.”
“No tell me Jack, or I will tell the guys that you got drunk tonight. You know what that means, you get kicked out of the band and I don’t want that.”
“Alex you wouldn’t.” He said, his eyes widening.
“One more chance Jack. Tell me.”
“Fine!” he screamed sitting up. “The pain is losing the one you love and then falling in love with someone else! Someone who doesn’t even want me. Someone I shouldn’t be in love with! Someone who has been my best friend since seventh grade!”

It all come out kind of rushed and it took a second to dawn on me. He was in love with me?

“Do you mean me?” I asked cautiously.

He just nodded, not saying a word. Jack was in love with me? How did I not know? Why didn’t he tell me?

“Jack why didn’t you tell me?”
“Ha why? Maybe because you’re my best friend, we are both guys, I lost the love of my life! Its wrong Alex.”
“Its not wrong to be gay, if that’s what you mean.”
“But I’m not gay. I loved Maria with all that I could. I didn’t even think about anyone else but her. Then after I lost her I swore I would never love anyone again. Then here you come, saving me. You saved me from myself and then I started getting feeling for you. I told myself I wouldn’t love again and I was getting feelings for you. So I drank them away. I got so drunk to try and forget you. It didn’t work. I hated myself for it. Then you guys made me get sober and spend all day with you. Do you have any idea how hard that was? It was hurting me so bad so I decided to try and drink it away. But you were so close and so warm. I couldn’t help it.”

I was so shocked. Jack was in love with me and I was the reason for his drinking? What the hell was I to do now?

Notes

Damn guys its been two weeks. I am so sorry. I went home for break and then got back just to turn around have to go to the city because mi best friend got into a wreck and broke her back, hip, and rib. It was bad. She had surgery and what not and this week is the first week of school. Its been a crazy time.

Anyway I am going to try and catch up on all mi fanfics now.

Thanks for sticking around guys.
I love ya <3