Guts

The next few days were hell. We had to push the tour back until further notice and everyone was so depressed. Jack would wake up long enough to use the bathroom then go back to bed. Zack was with his family. Rian and Matt tried to help me with Jack, but he just wouldn’t listen. We couldn’t make him eat, he barley drank water. We all feared for his health. We at least knew that Zack was being taken care of by his family; Jack on the other hand didn’t care about anything. When May brought the baby over he just pretended to be asleep just to get her to leave. When Joe came over he just yelled at him and told him to get out. His mom even called a few times from the hospital but he always just ignored it.

I was at a loss for what to do. The last time he had even showered was the day of the funeral, and then he went back to bed. The only person he would even acknowledge was Nevaeh. She would call every other night and talk to both Jack and I. He would answer, talk to her for a few, then go right back to bed. She was getting stronger; her body wasn’t rejecting the heart, which was a great sign. Soon they would let her leave the hospital and go home. I had plans on visiting her because she always asked how come we never stopped by. I told her Jack wasn’t well so I couldn’t leave him alone. She understood, for a little girl she was quite bright.

After about a week I had had enough of Jack not eating. I made food and barged into his room where I found him still sleeping. I pulled his blanket off and straddled him, causing him to wake up. He looked alarmed at first but then realized that it was only me and he tried to push me off but I wouldn’t budge. He started getting mad but I pinned his arms above his head with one hand and grabbed the food and started shoving it in his mouth. He tried to spit it out but I covered his mouth as soon as I stuck the food in. He had no choice but to swallow it. After he had eaten a whole sandwich I moved off of him and sat next to him on the bed.

To say he was mad was an understatement. He was furious, but it was for his own good. I sat there with him to make sure he didn’t go to the bathroom and throw it up. He huffed and puffed until he fell asleep. I still refused to leave the room, at some point in time I passed out with him. When I woke up he was gone. I jumped up and looked everywhere. Finally I checked the back yard. Sure enough he was there and he had somehow found a bottle of Jack Daniels. I grabbed it from his hand but it was too late, it was nearly empty.

*Wanna know how I got the bottle?*
^Yes I have wondered all these years.
*Well after you fell asleep, I went to the store and sat outside of it until I saw someone come out with beer and I offered him $50 to get me a few bottles. At first he was hesitant until I offered $100 then he quickly came out with 3 different bottles. Also guy I’m sorry I haven’t been adding my two cents much, but this is just a hard subject for me even now.*

I yelled at him but all he did was hiccup and look at me with empty eyes. I tried to get him up to go to the room but he just giggled at me and fell over. I was frustrated at this point so I just went inside and grabbed a few blankets. I threw one on the ground and wrapped the other around Jack and me.

His hiccups soon turned to sobs. Next thing I knew he was crying into my chest whispering Maria’s name. It killed me. I had no idea what I could do to take away his pain. I just held him as he cried. He kept asking me why did it have to be her. I honestly had no answers for him. After he eventually drifted off, I sat there and cried. He wasn’t the only one hurting. It killed me that I had lost my best friend. I wanted nothing more than to have her come walk through the back door and tell me it was okay and tell me how to fix Jack.

I finally cried myself to sleep only to wake up to a complaining Jack. The sun was too bright, his head hurt, he couldn’t see straight, blah blah blah. I pushed him off my chest and told him he got what he deserved. I grabbed what was left of the Jack Daniels and poured it out in the sink and grabbed a glass of water and medicine for Jack. I walked back outside to find him buried under the blankets. I pulled them off, earning a surprised yelp from Jack. I handed him the water and meds and he quickly downed them. I then grabbed the blankets and headed inside. Jack followed and plopped down onto the couch, never saying a word.

I had had enough of it. He wasn’t the only one hurting and he knew it. But that didn’t mean he could wallow in his own self pity forever. I walked over to the couch and slapped him right across the face. He was so shocked he just grabbed his cheek. I then proceeded to yell at him. Maria would not have wanted him starving himself and drinking himself into a stupor. It was just the opposite of what she wanted.

After I was done blowing up I told him I was going to see Nevaeh and he should come. I walked upstairs to shower and get ready, not caring at this moment if Jack was coming or not.

Notes

Aww poor Jack </3 Hopefully he will get better right??

The Jalex is coming soon. I'm excited!!

Love you guys! Thanks for sticking around, your the shizz!

xoxo ^.^