Breaking Down Walls.
Twenty-Two
D Y L A N
I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared about one person apart from my mom. Now as I sit in this waiting room all I want is for Alex to come out so I can go in. Everyone here has been trying to talk to me; all I can think is that this isn’t how it’s meant to be I wasn’t supposed to meet them like this. Every single one of them have shed tears for Ivy, apart from Alex, Ivy told me that he was her best friend but how can her best friend not even cry for her. I suppose he’s being strong for her maybe that’s what she would have wanted. I notice in the corner of my eye Alex nodding to Jack which means he’s finished I look over to him, he had a giant smile on his face. Why is he smiling, Ivy is laying lifeless on a hospital bed and all he can do is smile? I shot up from my seat before anyone else could I walked past him and shot him a sad smile, showing him that’s how he’s supposed to look not the way he is now. I walk straight in to Ivy’s room as shock to over my body. I felt new tears form and fall down my face burning into my skin. I try and compose myself before taking a seat on Ivy’s bed. I scan over every scar and cut on her thin arms and set a picture in my brain. Why didn’t I see how much pain she was really in, why didn’t I realize she was doing this? I could have stopped her if I just paid a bit more attention to her. I start to open my mouth knowing that I have to talk to her.
“Why Ivy? We could have spoken about this. You took all this out on yourself I wish I had known maybe I couldn’t help you but I would have done my best to try, I would have made you smile and laugh more, but listen when you wake up I will do anything you need me to, I don’t care what I have to do, I just want you to talk to me. I want to be your best friend, I want to be as close to you as Alex is now, I want you to tell me what’s going on up there” I say as I touch her head lightly “These past 3 weeks that I have known you have been amazing, I’ve never met someone as lovely as you, someone who would just take a random in and help them as much as you helped me. When you wake up I want to have a movie night with you, I’ll buy the snacks and us including Zack Rian Jack and Alex can have a night where we all get to know each other a little better. Sounds good right? I’m going to leave now just remember, you have to wake up from this everyone in that waiting room needs you Ivy, I wish you could know how much but you won’t until you open your eyes, and let them in. See you later Ivy”
I walked out of her room and sent another sad smile towards Alex and Jack.
J A C K
As soon as my phone call with Dylan ended, I ran out to my car holding back tears that threaten to fall, the tears weren’t just for me but for Zack and Alex to, that girl meant the world to them now she’s in a hospital bed, probably scared. I try to think of a reason why she would have done this. Yes she’s had a terrible year but she’s surrounded by so much love. Everyone who has ever got the chance to meet her loves her instantly even the friends she no longer talks to. Why can’t it just be simple? I want Ivy to wake up and realize how much love she has, and that everyone supports her, I wish someone could take her pain away. I may not be as close to her as other people but she’s one of my best friends, I want her to be okay. We’ve been in the hospital for quite some time now, Dylan has just been in, he walked out with a sad smile stuck on his face, and took a seat beside me and Alex, I was starting to panic. I looked over to Alex his face went white with fear.
“Dylan what happened is she okay? Please just tell me she’s okay”
Alex was the first one to speak
“Yes she’s fine, still the same but fine, if something happened do you think I would tell you first or her brother?”
I looked back over to Alex the color was returning to his face.
“So Dylan what happened why did you give us that look?”
I was next to speak.
“I can’t help but feel this is my fault, if I didn’t argue with her or I wasn’t working she wouldn’t be like this, she would be at your gig right now, enjoying herself”.
Shit everyone had forgot about the gig we are currently meant to be playing, and that we are meant to go on tour for another 3 weeks. I look over to Alex and gave him a look to tell him to look after Dylan and walk out of the ward to ring Matt to find out if he had covered us.
It has been an hour since I called matt who had indeed sorted it out, we were now home until Ivy got better, Then we have to re-do the three weeks left of the tour and find 2 different bands. I had no idea how Zack would take this, no one could even find him to tell him we knew he needed space but he hadn’t come back since he spoke to Ivy everyone was worried about him but he can handle himself. I decided it was finally my time to go in, I have tried to delay it but Rian had just come out and I was the only one left, her auntie had even been in before me. I started to mentally prepare myself to go in. of course I didn’t prepare myself enough for what I was about to see. I took the seat next to the bed taking in every cut and scar that settled on her arm, some more recent that others I couldn’t help but wish someone had seen it before all this has happened.
“Hey Ivy, I can’t even think of the right words to say to you darling. You’re amazing I really wish you didn’t do this, I bet no one has told you why we are back in B’more?”
I waited for an answer before remembering.
“I forgot you could answer me, I just hope you can hear us all. I’ll carry on before I get on to a different subject. We were going to surprise you by taking you to our gig we wanted you to have a good time, I was on my way to pick you up when I got into your house that’s where I found out. I was really excited to see you again you’re like my twin, you can match my hyperness which everyone finds amusing, but I guess you were acting so no one could tell what was actually going on, maybe we should have realized that you weren’t really meaning the smile that sat on your face. You have some much to live for girl, if you could just see it. You could be anything you want to be, you’re amazing Ivy I mean it. Zack really needs you to wake up, he’s gone missing and I know he could do with a phone call saying you’ve woken up. Even if that doesn’t happen he still needs you. Please just try and open your eyes, I would do anything to run out there and tell them that you’re awake and you’re alive. You and Zack both like to pretend you’re strong but now we can see through it we know that you are going to need us, and I don’t think anyone will let you pretend to be happy anymore, I know that one person won’t anyway, I hope Alex told you how he felt and he isn’t just saying it. Just wake up Ivy please”
There was nothing no movement from her, I knew it was going to take a while to get her to wake up, and for her to realize that we all need her, without Ivy there is no glue holding us together, I know that sounds stupidly cheesy but I mean it.
I lean over and kiss her forever I tell her to wake up one more time just in case she does. Again nothing. I say a goodbye and leave the room. I take my seat again next to Alex as I look to the door to see and sad looking Zack walk through and back into Ivy’s room I look at Alex giving him a questioning look.
“I have no idea, Jack we all tried calling him when you were in there but no answer I guess he just needed time”
I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared about one person apart from my mom. Now as I sit in this waiting room all I want is for Alex to come out so I can go in. Everyone here has been trying to talk to me; all I can think is that this isn’t how it’s meant to be I wasn’t supposed to meet them like this. Every single one of them have shed tears for Ivy, apart from Alex, Ivy told me that he was her best friend but how can her best friend not even cry for her. I suppose he’s being strong for her maybe that’s what she would have wanted. I notice in the corner of my eye Alex nodding to Jack which means he’s finished I look over to him, he had a giant smile on his face. Why is he smiling, Ivy is laying lifeless on a hospital bed and all he can do is smile? I shot up from my seat before anyone else could I walked past him and shot him a sad smile, showing him that’s how he’s supposed to look not the way he is now. I walk straight in to Ivy’s room as shock to over my body. I felt new tears form and fall down my face burning into my skin. I try and compose myself before taking a seat on Ivy’s bed. I scan over every scar and cut on her thin arms and set a picture in my brain. Why didn’t I see how much pain she was really in, why didn’t I realize she was doing this? I could have stopped her if I just paid a bit more attention to her. I start to open my mouth knowing that I have to talk to her.
“Why Ivy? We could have spoken about this. You took all this out on yourself I wish I had known maybe I couldn’t help you but I would have done my best to try, I would have made you smile and laugh more, but listen when you wake up I will do anything you need me to, I don’t care what I have to do, I just want you to talk to me. I want to be your best friend, I want to be as close to you as Alex is now, I want you to tell me what’s going on up there” I say as I touch her head lightly “These past 3 weeks that I have known you have been amazing, I’ve never met someone as lovely as you, someone who would just take a random in and help them as much as you helped me. When you wake up I want to have a movie night with you, I’ll buy the snacks and us including Zack Rian Jack and Alex can have a night where we all get to know each other a little better. Sounds good right? I’m going to leave now just remember, you have to wake up from this everyone in that waiting room needs you Ivy, I wish you could know how much but you won’t until you open your eyes, and let them in. See you later Ivy”
I walked out of her room and sent another sad smile towards Alex and Jack.
J A C K
As soon as my phone call with Dylan ended, I ran out to my car holding back tears that threaten to fall, the tears weren’t just for me but for Zack and Alex to, that girl meant the world to them now she’s in a hospital bed, probably scared. I try to think of a reason why she would have done this. Yes she’s had a terrible year but she’s surrounded by so much love. Everyone who has ever got the chance to meet her loves her instantly even the friends she no longer talks to. Why can’t it just be simple? I want Ivy to wake up and realize how much love she has, and that everyone supports her, I wish someone could take her pain away. I may not be as close to her as other people but she’s one of my best friends, I want her to be okay. We’ve been in the hospital for quite some time now, Dylan has just been in, he walked out with a sad smile stuck on his face, and took a seat beside me and Alex, I was starting to panic. I looked over to Alex his face went white with fear.
“Dylan what happened is she okay? Please just tell me she’s okay”
Alex was the first one to speak
“Yes she’s fine, still the same but fine, if something happened do you think I would tell you first or her brother?”
I looked back over to Alex the color was returning to his face.
“So Dylan what happened why did you give us that look?”
I was next to speak.
“I can’t help but feel this is my fault, if I didn’t argue with her or I wasn’t working she wouldn’t be like this, she would be at your gig right now, enjoying herself”.
Shit everyone had forgot about the gig we are currently meant to be playing, and that we are meant to go on tour for another 3 weeks. I look over to Alex and gave him a look to tell him to look after Dylan and walk out of the ward to ring Matt to find out if he had covered us.
It has been an hour since I called matt who had indeed sorted it out, we were now home until Ivy got better, Then we have to re-do the three weeks left of the tour and find 2 different bands. I had no idea how Zack would take this, no one could even find him to tell him we knew he needed space but he hadn’t come back since he spoke to Ivy everyone was worried about him but he can handle himself. I decided it was finally my time to go in, I have tried to delay it but Rian had just come out and I was the only one left, her auntie had even been in before me. I started to mentally prepare myself to go in. of course I didn’t prepare myself enough for what I was about to see. I took the seat next to the bed taking in every cut and scar that settled on her arm, some more recent that others I couldn’t help but wish someone had seen it before all this has happened.
“Hey Ivy, I can’t even think of the right words to say to you darling. You’re amazing I really wish you didn’t do this, I bet no one has told you why we are back in B’more?”
I waited for an answer before remembering.
“I forgot you could answer me, I just hope you can hear us all. I’ll carry on before I get on to a different subject. We were going to surprise you by taking you to our gig we wanted you to have a good time, I was on my way to pick you up when I got into your house that’s where I found out. I was really excited to see you again you’re like my twin, you can match my hyperness which everyone finds amusing, but I guess you were acting so no one could tell what was actually going on, maybe we should have realized that you weren’t really meaning the smile that sat on your face. You have some much to live for girl, if you could just see it. You could be anything you want to be, you’re amazing Ivy I mean it. Zack really needs you to wake up, he’s gone missing and I know he could do with a phone call saying you’ve woken up. Even if that doesn’t happen he still needs you. Please just try and open your eyes, I would do anything to run out there and tell them that you’re awake and you’re alive. You and Zack both like to pretend you’re strong but now we can see through it we know that you are going to need us, and I don’t think anyone will let you pretend to be happy anymore, I know that one person won’t anyway, I hope Alex told you how he felt and he isn’t just saying it. Just wake up Ivy please”
There was nothing no movement from her, I knew it was going to take a while to get her to wake up, and for her to realize that we all need her, without Ivy there is no glue holding us together, I know that sounds stupidly cheesy but I mean it.
I lean over and kiss her forever I tell her to wake up one more time just in case she does. Again nothing. I say a goodbye and leave the room. I take my seat again next to Alex as I look to the door to see and sad looking Zack walk through and back into Ivy’s room I look at Alex giving him a questioning look.
“I have no idea, Jack we all tried calling him when you were in there but no answer I guess he just needed time”
Notes
I hope everyone is okay with how the story is coming along so far.
I was writing this whilst listening to All time low vs You me at six on tv. Just thought that was a fun fact.
Tell me what you think because I really want to know. The next chapter will probably be Rians and her Aunties
-Kay
Thanks to Rock_Music_Killed_My_Soul for giving me a shout out on her Story and also for commenting on this one! love to you.
Also Thanks to KateTheGreat69 again for commenting. Love to you as well.
Hops on black Pegasus of rainbow feels to ride next story
9/6/14