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No Pads… No Helmets… Just Memories!

Secrets Hurt Like Punches

I tried not to think about it.


I tried not to think about it. I tried not to think about the fact no one had seen Alex since he fled from my house Sunday morning. I tried not to think about the fact that he didn't show up to their band practice that night. I tried not to think about the fact he hadn't answered not just mine but Jack's calls and texts.


I tried not to think about the fact no one had seen him this morning. I tried not to think about the fact he never showed up to lunch and I so desperately tried to ignore the empty seat behind Tammy on the other side of the math room. I tried to ignore the voice in my head telling me I knew this would happen, that nothing could be so simple, that I couldn't just move on and be happy and finally, I tried to ignore the fact that I was so worried about Alex.


It wasn’t like we had this close relationship where I always knew where he was at all times of everyday. It wasn’t that at all. The only time I knew where Alex was, was when I was in the same room as him. Other than that I never second guess, or guessed at all about his location. But I couldn't shake that something felt off. The clench in my gut wouldn't let his absence go. It wouldn't surprise me if he skipped, or just didn't feel like showing up to school, he'd done it enough the past three months of school that it wasn't all that abnormal, but that he wouldn't talk to jack and didn't go to band practice filled me with unease.


Maybe it was how he left. That he couldn't tell me what was going on. That he apologized before slipping out the door.


Alex doesn’t just apologize for the hell of it. Alexander Gaskarth was and still is a stubborn bitch, something big would have to have made him just dart like that, something he couldn’t tell me.


"Jasey he’s fine." A voice hushed as I was ripped from my internal mumbling to glance at my auburn haired friend. My eyes blown wide as I looked up at her from my notes.


"Who’s fine?" I asked causing her to puff and roll her eyes.


"Alex." She cooed, "I’m sure he just skipped."


I swallowed the lump in my throat as I nodded returning my gaze to my math notes. Andrea was right. He was probably sitting at home writing a song or trying to up his Mario Kart game with his hand stuffed into a bag of Milano's. I’d get out of soccer workouts after school and return home to see all the guys destroying our kitchen like every other day. He was fine.


I decided to try and focus on studying for the test we would have on Friday before thanksgiving break, instead of ripping my hair out over my maybe kind of best friend who wasn’t even there. There couldn’t have been more than fifteen minutes left of the school day in a whole when the class room door opened and a dark figure stepped in. I bit down on the chapped portions of my lower lip and shook my head. It wasn’t him. I wasn’t going the look up. I wasn’t going to get my hopes up. I had to teach myself how to control my own mind and quit letting things go so easily, it would only continue to cause issues. I kept repeating the same thing over and over trying to force my mind to read the equations and numbers on the paper before me but all I could focus on was the blurry figure in my peripherals as it shuffled over to Ms. Aikman’s desk.


“Uhm sorry I’m late-”


“Late, the school day is almost over Alexander, and you’re coming in “late”” the little old teacher snapped causing my head to snap up at the name.


“Uhm yeah,” said boy spoke scratching at the back of his hood covered neck, “I came to collect all the notes I missed from my teachers.”


“Well you’ll have to copy them from one of your peers because I have no copies to give to you.” she spoke coldly.


“Uhm okay I guess.” he mumbled turning on his heels to face the class, his eyes trained on his shoes.


“Alex you can borrow mine man!” a random boy piped up before leaning forward to place a tattered notebook in Alex’s grasp.


“And Alexander, no hoods in school!” Ms. A scolded causing Alex to noticeably stiffen.


“But class is almost over.” he muttered under his breath causing me to scrunch my features and steal a glance at Andrea who just shrugged and looked back at her phone tucked in her lap.


“Rules are rules Alexander, just because you're in some local punk band doesn't make you royalty!” she scoffed causing the class to giggle, “Now, hood. off.”


Alex let out a loud sigh as he started for his desk before pulling at the hood. His hand automatically moving to cradle half his face as he sat down, resting his head in his hands. There was something odd about Alex. And not just that the pep in his step was nowhere to be found but that his whole classic domineer wasn’t there. Like this Alex was a while other being than the Alex everyone had grown to love, something had to have happened between Sunday morning and then to have caused that.


I shot Dre a flat smile as I stood from my desk as the bell sounded, something in her eyes told me she knew I wasn’t going to let Alex walk away without telling me what was going on, that she would wait so we could go to soccer workouts. She stepped out the door as I made my way through the flooding people over to Alex’s desk where he stood forcefully shoving a book into his overstuffed bag.


“Alex?” I called causing him to lightly jump before turning and relaxing as his eyes rolled over me, but there was something odd, I couldn’t actually see his eyes or his face at all. His hood was already pulled over his head casting a shadow over his entire face.


“Jasey I can’t talk, I’ll call you later.” he rolled as he stepped past me and to the door.


“Alex no!” I called grabbing his elbow as he crossed out into the hallway, “Tell me what’s going on!”


“I told you I can’t.” he muttered looking down.


He wanted to. I knew that much. Alex may have been a lanky kid, but I’m only about five foot two, he could have easily just pulled from my grasp and continued on his way with ease, but he didn't, he stopped. He wanted to tell me, so why wouldn’t he?


“Alex!” I said pinching my lips to a fine line, “then tell me why you haven’t been answering me and Jack’s calls!”


“Jasey I really can’t talk now.” he almost whispered dropping his head further.


“No Alex, were talking!” I almost snapped reaching up to snatch the hood off his head, “and will you take off this damn hood and look at me whi-”


“Alex…” I hushed scanning my eyes over his features, “what the hell happened to you!”


“It was nothing I said I couldn’t talk!” he said frantically looking around while reaching back for his hood but I caught his arm.


“Alex this isn’t nothing!” I hushed as I lifted a hand to his face causing him to wince, “Who did this to you?”


“Its fine Jasey, let it be!” he spoke pushing my hand from his face as I continued to stare. I couldn’t take my eyes off his face, his blood stained, mangled face. The bruising that bubbled under and around his eye. The brown and purple discoloration, the gash across the bridge of his nose.


“Alex will you please just tell me who did this to you?” I barely whispered as I reached a hand up to run a thumb over the split on his bottom lip.


“I can’t.” he whispered shaking his head as he looked down on me; his eyes that I swear began to fill with tears.


“Jasey we got to go or were going to be late and Coach Syds gonna kill us!”


“Alex…”


“Go!” he hushed pushing me towards Andrea.


“Alex?”

“Jasey,” Andrea hushed as she took my arm and I watched Alex pull up his hood and walk away, “Let him go.”

Notes

DUN DUN DUNNN!!

alright so sorry to who ever asked me to treat everyone right.. i already have everything laid out :/

wupps..

BUT TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS PLEASE I LOVE HEARING THEM!

and be sure to vote and subscribe to the story if you are enjoying it and havent already!

-Sarah :)

Comments

I'M GOING TO CRY NO WHY WHY DID HE HAVE TO DIE

Daydreamers Daydreamers
2/14/16

@Jalexwouldyoutakemehome
@alltimeblowww
@bandsaremylife
@A.W.G
@for-neverland
@Magz507


Okay so I'm SarahBethBarakat but I lost this account since google changed it's log-in and I can't get in now...
so if y'all could do me a huge solid and readTHISand comment and help me out that would be super dupepr awesome and amazing <3 and I'm SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE HUGE AND ANNOYING INCONVENIENCE THIS IS!

Sarah-Barakat Sarah-Barakat
5/16/15

@Punkchick
@asdfghjkl;;
@Jagk Skellington
@AllThingsBeautiful
@i_love_balz

Okay so I'm SarahBethBarakat but I lost this account since google changed it's log-in and I can't get in now...
so if y'all could do me a huge solid and readTHISand comment and help me out that would be super dupepr awesome and amazing <3 and I'm SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE HUGE AND ANNOYING INCONVENIENCE THIS IS!

Sarah-Barakat Sarah-Barakat
5/16/15

@Punkchick
@asdfghjkl;;
@Jagk Skellington
@AllThingsBeautiful
@i_love_balz

Okay so I'm SarahBethBarakat but I lost this account since google changed it's log-in and I can't get in now...
so if y'all could do me a huge solid and readTHISand comment and help me out that would be super dupepr awesome and amazing <3 and I'm SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE HUGE AND ANNOYING INCONVENIENCE THIS IS!

Sarah-Barakat Sarah-Barakat
5/16/15

@Punkchick
@asdfghjkl;;
@Jagk Skellington
@AllThingsBeautiful
@i_love_balz

Okay so I'm SarahBethBarakat but I lost this account since google changed it's log-in and I can't get in now...
so if y'all could do me a huge solid and readTHISand comment and help me out that would be super dupepr awesome and amazing <3 and I'm SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE HUGE AND ANNOYING INCONVENIENCE THIS IS!

Sarah-Barakat Sarah-Barakat
5/16/15