Don't Be So Sentimental, This Love Was Accidental
Clueless
Alex’s POV
I was using Caitlyn and I’m pretty sure everyone knew that except for her. I wanted Lillie more than anything. Everything about her appealed to me. She was the kind of girl I dreamed of meeting one day but never thought I would, and when I did, it was the best day of my life. But then she kissed Jack.
Caitlyn was great. An amazing friend, great in bed, and she almost never asked questions. But she was no Lillie. After I dropped Caitlyn off at her house (followed by some quick sex in her bedroom) I headed home to find my house deserted. All the lights were off downstairs. It shouldn’t have surprised me, since it was nearly two in the morning, but Lillie wasn’t in her room, either. I walked into every room, looking for her familiar red hair and slight features, and finally found her in the last room I’d check—the guest room. But, since Jack stayed over so often, it was practically his room. And sure enough, Jack was there, holding Lillie in his arms, lipstick on his face, both of them dressed in only undergarments. They were doing this just to torture me. I began to creep out of the room, hoping this was some twisted nightmare and when I woke up, Lillie would be in my arms, but I stepped a little too loudly as I left, and someone woke up.
“Alex?” To my disappointment and somehow also to my relief, it was Jack. He slowly crawled out of bed, rubbing his eyes, and led me into the hallway. “What the hell, man? Were you watching us sleep?”
“No,” I defended immediately, “I couldn’t find Lillie. Are you two together now or something?” I asked. I had to know. Jack was hesitant to answer.
“Yeah, kinda.” Jack said. My heart sank. I’d never felt like this before. I needed Lillie and she wanted Jack and I knew it was going to kill me. “But only because you had to be a douchebag and fuck Caitlyn right in front of Lillie. I’m her rebound from you, dude.”
“And you’re okay with that? Or is she just another slut to you?” I felt my cheeks burn red. Maybe this was my fault, but if Jack was using Lillie as his little bitch, I swear I would fucking kill him.
“No!” Jack spat. “I care about her. I know she still likes you but I have feelings for her, alright? She’s the best girl I’ve ever met. I feel amazing when I’m around her. Maybe you were willing to just throw that away, but I’m not. I…I might love her.” I swallowed hard. Jack had just summed up exactly how I felt about Lillie. But how did she feel about us? Was it possible for someone to have two true loves? Sometimes I felt like I did. For awhile I thought I might love Caitlyn, but there was someone else. Someone who was always there—Jack. I loved Jack for sure, and sometimes I thought it was in a way more than friends. I had the urge to grab the shirt and pull him into me and just kiss him. And maybe it was because it was two in the morning and I was tired and confused and upset, but that’s exactly what I did. I pulled Jack into me and pressed our lips together. And to my surprise, Jack kissed back. This kiss had an intensity that I’d never had with anyone else—even Lillie. While Lillie’s kisses have spark and sincerity and felt absolutely right, Jack’s kisses were intense and so wrong they felt right. I don’t know how long we were there, fingers tangled in each other’s hair, lips moving in sync, our boners pressed together, but we pulled away when we heard a groan. Lillie was stirring very slightly, but she went back to a deep sleep. Without a word, Jack and I made eye contact for a moment before I bolted down the hall and into the bathroom to take a long, cold shower. What did I want? I was clueless.
I was using Caitlyn and I’m pretty sure everyone knew that except for her. I wanted Lillie more than anything. Everything about her appealed to me. She was the kind of girl I dreamed of meeting one day but never thought I would, and when I did, it was the best day of my life. But then she kissed Jack.
Caitlyn was great. An amazing friend, great in bed, and she almost never asked questions. But she was no Lillie. After I dropped Caitlyn off at her house (followed by some quick sex in her bedroom) I headed home to find my house deserted. All the lights were off downstairs. It shouldn’t have surprised me, since it was nearly two in the morning, but Lillie wasn’t in her room, either. I walked into every room, looking for her familiar red hair and slight features, and finally found her in the last room I’d check—the guest room. But, since Jack stayed over so often, it was practically his room. And sure enough, Jack was there, holding Lillie in his arms, lipstick on his face, both of them dressed in only undergarments. They were doing this just to torture me. I began to creep out of the room, hoping this was some twisted nightmare and when I woke up, Lillie would be in my arms, but I stepped a little too loudly as I left, and someone woke up.
“Alex?” To my disappointment and somehow also to my relief, it was Jack. He slowly crawled out of bed, rubbing his eyes, and led me into the hallway. “What the hell, man? Were you watching us sleep?”
“No,” I defended immediately, “I couldn’t find Lillie. Are you two together now or something?” I asked. I had to know. Jack was hesitant to answer.
“Yeah, kinda.” Jack said. My heart sank. I’d never felt like this before. I needed Lillie and she wanted Jack and I knew it was going to kill me. “But only because you had to be a douchebag and fuck Caitlyn right in front of Lillie. I’m her rebound from you, dude.”
“And you’re okay with that? Or is she just another slut to you?” I felt my cheeks burn red. Maybe this was my fault, but if Jack was using Lillie as his little bitch, I swear I would fucking kill him.
“No!” Jack spat. “I care about her. I know she still likes you but I have feelings for her, alright? She’s the best girl I’ve ever met. I feel amazing when I’m around her. Maybe you were willing to just throw that away, but I’m not. I…I might love her.” I swallowed hard. Jack had just summed up exactly how I felt about Lillie. But how did she feel about us? Was it possible for someone to have two true loves? Sometimes I felt like I did. For awhile I thought I might love Caitlyn, but there was someone else. Someone who was always there—Jack. I loved Jack for sure, and sometimes I thought it was in a way more than friends. I had the urge to grab the shirt and pull him into me and just kiss him. And maybe it was because it was two in the morning and I was tired and confused and upset, but that’s exactly what I did. I pulled Jack into me and pressed our lips together. And to my surprise, Jack kissed back. This kiss had an intensity that I’d never had with anyone else—even Lillie. While Lillie’s kisses have spark and sincerity and felt absolutely right, Jack’s kisses were intense and so wrong they felt right. I don’t know how long we were there, fingers tangled in each other’s hair, lips moving in sync, our boners pressed together, but we pulled away when we heard a groan. Lillie was stirring very slightly, but she went back to a deep sleep. Without a word, Jack and I made eye contact for a moment before I bolted down the hall and into the bathroom to take a long, cold shower. What did I want? I was clueless.
Bro. Where'd you go?! This is so good!
12/22/13