Life isn't a fashion statement.

Alex's POV

I wasn't allowed to go to Quinn's and Beth's wedding but I was given special permission to go to the after party and spend the out of the inpatients since I was being 'good' and was slowly gaining but it wasn't much since Jack came round 2 weeks ago.
"Damn if only you was straight." Frankie said as she walked into my room and made herself at home on my bed. Since our fall out when I first came here we've somehow became good friends.
"I'm engaged remember, you know that really hot guy that stay 2 weeks ago? That is all mine and I'm not sharing him with anyone." I said and Frankie chuckled.
"Does it look obvious that I've got an eating disorder?" I asked and looked at myself in the mirror.
"Too others it might do but to me, I still see the same man I fell in love with." I heard Jack say and I looked at him through the mirror and smiled at him which Jack returned.
"Why are the cute ones gay, I need to be a gay guy not a bisexual girl." Frankie moaned as she walked out my room.
"Its because we're Gods forbidden fruit." I said after her and I turned round and looked Jack up and down in his suit.
"Damn that sight goes straight to my dick." I said as I walked over to Jack which made him laugh.
"Later on you can get me out of these." Jack said quietly in my ear and I smirked at him.
"Does this look okay? It doesn't scream out that I'm actually ill or anything like that." I said as I looked down and you could I am not well but hopefully nobody notice when I get there.
"Well people will probably notice the thigh gap since you haven't got much fat on your legs yet, but it'll come in time. But you don't take any notice of them because it's all about Quinn and Beth." Jack said and I smiled at him and Jack caught hold of my hand and we went to where the after party was.

"So how is life in the inpatients treating you then?" Quinn asked as me and her went outside to smoke a cigarette and so we could have a catch up since it's been a while.
"Well for the last week I've been tubed, I've admitted that I'm suicidal and my life is pretty shit there at the moment but I'm being forced to recover because I want to get out of there." I said and Quinn sighed.
"How come your not tubed tonight then?" Quinn asked.
"Because I've actually gained weight to be taken off the tube and also I don't want to be the freak at your wedding with a tube up his nose." I said and Quinn chuckled and pulled me to her side.
"Trust me, until you meet Beth's brother you are not a freak compared to him." Quinn said and I couldn't help but smile.
"I'm sorry I missed your wedding." I said quietly.
"Well Jack made a excellent replacement best man but it wasn't the same without you, but you are here now and together we are getting drunk and have some fucking good sex." Quinn said and I couldn't help but laugh at this.
"Christ I've missed you." I chuckled and Quinn kissed the top of my head.
"I've missed you too Lex." Quinn said quietly.
"So did your parents or any family show up?" I asked and Quinn sighed.
"They turned around and said I was pretty much dead to them and that I wouldn't hear from them until I come home with a man and not a woman, but they sent hugs." Quinn said.
"Well I can be your husband if you want me too, I'm sure Jack won't mind." I said.
"Jack won't mind what?" I heard Beth say from behind me and Quinn.
"Alex being my husband if I ever wanted to see the people who gave birth to me." Quinn said.
"Hands off asshole, she's mine now, anyway your Prince Charming is looking for you." Beth said and I smiled and got up.
"I'm happy for you two, I'm sorry I missed the actual wedding but I'm here for the best part though." I said and Beth and Quinn chuckled.
"Go and find your Romeo, we'll see you later. Don't drink too much and make good choices." Quinn said.
"Well I'm not promising nothing." I said and walked off and went looking for Jack.

I found Jack talking to Beth's dad and I walked over and stood close to Jack and his hand went straight to my side and pulled me closer without breaking away from what he was saying to Beth's dad.
"Well I'll leave you boys alone, take it easy Jack and look after him." Beth's dad said and walked off and I looked at Jack who smiled at me.
"So everyone is looking at us." I said as I got myself and Jack another glass of champagne which I handed one to Jack who smiled a thanks too me.
"Probably because people have been saying stuff about us." Jack said and I looked at him with a frown.
"What the fuck have they been saying about us?" I asked really confused because I've been disconnected from the world since being at the inpatients.
"They've been saying that you had cheated on me and that we have split up and all that shit and that I'm moving back to the states." Jack said and looked down.
"But you haven't cheated on me though and we're still together since I still have my engagement ring on my finger and your not moving back to the states are you?" I said and Jack caught hold of my hand and we went somewhere a bit quieter.
"This can't be good can it?" I asked quietly and looked down which made Jack look at me.
"I haven't cheated on you, we are still together but I might have to go back to the states for a while." Jack said and Jack let me look down this time.
"Why?" I asked quietly.
"My dad isn't well and the doctors are doing a shit job on looking after him so I'm paying for him to have better treatment. I have to go back to support mum through this." Jack said.
"Can I come as well?" I asked and looked at Jack.
"I need you to focus on getting better and you are doing so well on that Alex." Jack said and I looked down feeling hurt.
"I can't do this without you Jack. I need you as well." I said trying not to shout.
"Don't make me choose Alex because I wouldn't be able to choose." Jack sighed.
"I wouldn't make you choose." I said quietly and I went to walk off but Jack caught hold of my hand and gently pulled me into his chest.
"I love you, please don't ever forget that." Jack said quietly and stoked my cheek which made me smile the smile Jack only got to see.
"I love you too." I said quietly and kissed Jack which he returned.
"Its a bit rude to be upstaging the brides isn't it?" Quinn chuckled and I gave her the middle finger while still kissing Jack.
"Christ put him down, your both in public and not in your house. Also no fucking in the bathrooms." Quinn said seriously and I pulled back and rested my head on Jacks chest.
"Well that's our plan up the shitter." Jack said and I chuckled.
"Hey Lex I want to ask you something, do you want to sit with me, Beth and her parents or do you want to sit somewhere not as much in center of attention when it's food?" Quinn asked.
"Bit of a stupid question, I'm going to eat with you." I said and Quinn smiled and touched my arm and walked off.
"You sure you'll be okay?" Jack asked and I nodded.
"If in doubt I'll just purge it back up again." I said and Jack sighed.
"I'll be fine." I said and caught hold of Jack's hand and we socialized with everyone until it was time to eat.

After we had eaten it was time for the party and to be honest I couldn't wait and let my hair down after the shit month I've had at inpatients.
I was sat on Jacks lap happily watching Beth and Quinn have their first dance together.
Jack was messing with my engagement ring which made me look at him and smile and Jack kissed me which I returned.
"You know our wedding is going to be a massive piss up." I said and Jack chuckled.
"Well knowing my family it will probably turn into a big piss up." Jack said and I couldn't help but look down and feel sad.
"What's the matter?" Jack asked and made me look at him.
"Just hearing you talk about your family and I couldn't help but think about mine and how much they are actually missing of my life, that they don't get to see this amazing person in front of me and see how happy you make me." I said and Jack smiled and got up and caught hold of my hand and dragged me to join Beth and Quinn and other couples on the dance floor.
"Why did you do this?" I asked as I wrapped my arms round Jacks neck and I felt Jacks hand on the bottom of my back.
"Because we're a couple and I wanted to dance with you and your ass is really boney and it was making my leg go dead." Jack said and I couldn't help but chuckle.
"I just remembered, who's looking after the dog?" I asked and Jack chuckled.
"Kellin and Vic are looking after him and the house so Christ knows what the place will look like when I go home." Jack said and I just sighed and rested my chin on Jacks shoulder.
"I'm outside if you want me." I said and kissed Jack and walked outside.

Once I was outside I pulled out a cigarette and started to smoke it and I sat down and felt some tears starting to roll down my cheek which I wiped away and sniffed.
I heard someone walk over and sat next to me and fishing through my jacket pocket and pulling out a cigarette and started to smoke a cigarette with me.
"Why you sat out here and not enjoying your freedom?" I heard Jack ask and I looked at him.
"You don't smoke." I sniffed and Jack looked at me.
"I do when it's weddings." Jack said and I smiled and moved closer to him and rested my head on his shoulder smoking my cigarette.
"Babe what's the matter?" Jack asked seriously.
"Everyone is just moving forward in their lives and I'm fucking stuck in inpatient not making any progress. Everything is fucked up." I said and moved away from Jack and looked down.
"I don't want to go back Jack." I said quietly and Jack stood up and offered me his hand which I took and we went for a walk somewhere.
"Right come on let it all out on what your feeling." Jack said and I noticed him rolling something and the smell of weed hitting my nose.
"Okay, you don't smoke and I know for a fact you don't smoke weed. The fuck is going on with you." I said and Jack handed me the joint which I took and started to smoke it.
"I smoke sometimes when I'm stressed at work or I'm worrying about you. I don't smoke weed, but I know how to roll a joint from back when I was at college." Jack said and I chuckled.
"Now tell me what is going on with you Alex." Jack said seriously.
"Everyone is moving forwards in their lives and I feel like I'm not going anywhere, I feel like I'm losing everyone who means the world to me and I can't stop them from leaving me and I don't know what to do Jack." I said and Jack made me look at him.
"I'm not going anywhere Lex. I'm not leaving you, never in a million years would I leave. You are stuck with me for the rest of your life." Jack said and kissed me which I returned and hugged Jack tightly and kissed his neck.
"You can always count on me Lex. I'm always here for you no matter what." Jack said quietly and I smiled and pulled back and had some of my joint and put my hand out.
"You sure you don't want to try it?" I asked and Jack shook his head.
"I like my alcohol more than I like drugs." Jack said.
"Drugs aren't that bad." I said sort of feeling the weed hitting me.
"Obviously you have never seen yourself high off your face then." Jack said and I rolled my eyes at him.
"Wanna play the eye rolling game with me?" Jack asked playfully and pulled me close to him.
"Depends on what I get out of it." I smirked and Jack slapped my ass with a smirk on his face.
I was going to say something but Quinn was heading towards us.
"Jesus Christ guys, aren't you even drunk yet?" Quinn said.
"I'm high if that counts." I said and Quinn walked over and took the joint off me and had some herself.
"I'm hungry. Come get food with me." I said and Jack chuckled and caught hold my hand and we went and found me something to eat.

I was drunk and Jack was as well I think but I have no clue and I had managed to lose Jack somewhere.
I walked over to Quinn and she pulled me into a hug since she was drunk.
"Hey Lex, you okay?" Quinn said loudly over the music.
"I've lost Jack, have you seen him?" I said and Quinn nodded and she looked up and smiled which made me frown and I turned round and saw Jack who handed me a shot which I took.
"Where was you!? I was looking for you!" I said loudly and poked Jack and took a couple of steps forwards and Jack wrapped a arm round my waist.
"I told you I was getting us a drink." Jack said and I frowned at him.
"I don't remember." I said and went to move but Jacks hand stay firmly on my hip.
"That's because you was too busy making a tit of yourself, which is why we are disappearing." Jack said.
"I'm not going anywhere, I'm having a good time." I had and Jack pulled me closer to him.
"If we go back now I'll order us drinks and we can have a good them there." Jack said quietly and I looked at him and smiled.
I turned round and looked at Quinn who smiled at me and walked over and pulled me into a hug.
"Look after yourself and Jack okay. I'll come and visit you once I've come off my honeymoon and I'll promise I'll make you jealous of it." Quinn said and I could t help but chuckle.
"Bitch you better." I chuckled and let go of Quinn who pulled Jack into a hug and said something to him and Jack pulled back and put his hand behind my back and we got a taxi and went to the hotel Jack had us staying at for the night.

I was stood outside in my pants and Jacks suit jacket on smoking a cigarette.
"You'll catch yourself a death if you don't put more clothes on." Jack said and I turned round and saw Jack in his sweats and a Blink-182 sweatshirt.
"I have your jacket I'll be fine." I said and Jack tipped his head to the side with a frown on his face.
"Lex, your cold and I know your cold because your scars are purple and that is telling me your cold." Jack said and I shrugged my shoulders.
"The cold never really bothered me, yeah winter was hard but somehow you'll always be harden to it." I said and Jack walked over to me and put his hand on my forehead.
"Would you like to have a good time or not?" Jack asked and I looked at him and grabbed hold of his top and pulled him towards me and kissed him hard.
"The answer is always going to be yes." I said quietly and kissed Jack again and he lifted me up where I wrapped my legs round his waist and Jack hands went under my ass and he walked us to where the bed was and we worked on taking each other's clothes off.

I was cuddled into Jack side and we was watching this crap what was on in the early hours of the morning because there was literally nothing else to watch.
"I don't want to go back Jack." I said quietly as Jack traces patterns down my back.
"I know you don't want to go back but you are finally gaining, yeah I know a relapse is possible but you are doing so well Alex." Jack said and I just sighed.
"I've missed this, cuddling you in bed, having sex when we want it, falling asleep in your arms feeling safe." I said quietly.
"I miss it as well. Your bloody dog isn't the best thing to cuddle and the drool, don't get me started on that." Jack said and I chuckled.
"I miss Hanks cuddles." I said quietly and put my leg over Jacks as I rolled onto my side and put my arm across Jacks chest.
"But I've missed yours more though." I said and looked at Jack who smiled at me.
"I haven't missed you hogging the covers though." Jack chuckled quietly.
I felt round for the covers and pulled it more over me and Jack.
"I love you Lex." Jack said quietly and he linked his hand with mine.
"I love you too." I mumbled as I finally let sleep take over me and I fell in a deep sleep for the first time in ages.

Notes

Took me forever to write this but it utter shit