Life isn't a fashion statement.

Jacks POV

Its been a week since Alex's somewhat breakdown and I was worried about him as he wasn't Alex.
"Babe, talk to me and tell me what is wrong and don't say nothing because I know something is wrong." I said as I walked out to the kitchen where Alex was just drinking a coffee.
"Have you eaten?" I asked and Alex nodded.
"Babe, you sure because we're going to be having a long day at work and I don't want you passing out." I said and walked over to him.
"I've eaten, I'm just going to freshen up and get dressed." Alex said and walked over and kissed my cheek and walked towards our room once I heard the shower going I had a look round to see if Alex had eaten.
Turned out he hasn't eaten but I wasn't going to let on that I know.
I was just hoping that nothing happens today.

Alex was doing loads of shoots with Quinn today and I was just hoping Alex was going to hold out.
"Quinn can I talk to you a second?" I said and Quinn nodded and Alex looked at me comfused.
"Hey Jacko." Quinn said happily.
I was glad Quinn managed to get over what had happened to her a few weeks ago.
"Hey Quinn, can you do me a favor?" I asked and Quinn nodded.
"Sure, what do you wan me to do?" Quinn asked.
"I need you too keep an eye on Alex for me. He hasn't eaten today and I don't know how long he hasn't eaten for. He's completely shut down on me right now and I know he talks to you probably more than me." I said quietly.
"Yeah sure I'll do that. If he says anything to me I'll let you know." Quinn said and put her hand on my arm which made me smile.
"Thanks Quinn." I said quietly and walked out the room and went to my office.

I was miles away sorting stuff out when someone came running into the office.
"Haven't you heard of knocking?" I asked not looking up from my laptop.
"I know Jack normally I would knock but Alex has collapsed." Quinn said and I looked up from the laptop.
"What?" I asked confused.
"Alex has collapsed I dunno why but I think your theory of him not eating is the big reason why." Quinn said and I got up and walked towards the studio.
I walked in the studio.
"Everyone is to go home now." I said loud enough for everyone to hear me.
There was a few moans and groans about it but everyone was gone within 15 minutes.
"Have you call the ambulance?" I asked Quinn and knelt beside Alex.
"Yeah." Quinn said and Alex was just coming back to life.
"What happened?" Alex said quietly and went to sit up but I gently pushed him back down again.
"You collapsed. Do you know why?" I asked seriously and Alex looked down which meant he was hiding something.
"Alex you can tell me, I'm not going to be angry at you." I said softly.
"I can't say." Alex whispered and sat up and held held his head.
"Tell me Lex." I said and moved some hair from his face.
"I've relapse." Alex whispered really quietly I almost didn't hear him.
"How long ago?" I asked and Quinn got up and left me and Alex alone.
"2 weeks ago." Alex said quietly and looked down.
"Baby why didn't you tell me?" I asked.
"Because you would want to leave me." Alex said and looked down with tears rolling down his cheeks.
I made Alex look at me.
"I'm not leaving you." I said seriously and kissed him.
"The ambulance is here guys." Quinn said and walked over to us.
"What about the dog?" Alex asked and looked at me and Quinn.
"Me and Beth will look after him. He'll be okay." Quinn said and kissed the top of his head.

I went with Alex and we was sat in a quiet part of A&E.
Alex was lead on the bed facing away from me.
"Babe look at me." I said softly and Alex rolled over to face me.
"What have you relapsed on?" I asked carefully.
"Eating and self harm. I'm sorry Jack I dunno what happened on minute I was fine and the next I had to self harm I sorry." Alex sobbed.
"Shush it's okay, we can get over this together okay. I'm going to give you as much time as you need off work to get you better." I said and linked my little finger with his which made him smile.
"I don't want to stay in a ward." Alex said quietly.
"I'll make sure you don't go on a ward okay, you just go to sleep." I said quietly and moved some hair from his eyes.
"Stay please." Alex whispered.
"I'm going nowhere. Rest, it's going to be a long night." I said quietly and Alex felt for my hand and when he found my hand he linked his fingers wth mine.
I smiled and Alex just fell asleep.

I was jus falling asleep myself when a nurse showed up to examine Alex.
"Hello sir." The nurse said with a smile and I smiled back and looked at Alex who was sound asleep still holding my hand.
"Can you tell me what relation you are to Mr Gaskarth." The nurse said and put his gloves on.
"I'm his partner. Do you have to do your checks now? He's literally just fallen asleep." I said and looked at Alex who sighed in his sleep.
"I'm afraid so Sir. But hopefully we can move him into a ward where they can understand his disorder better." The nurse said.
"He doesn't want to go on a ward." I said and looked at the nurse.
"For tonight he will need to go on the ward. But we just need to do checks on him and then he'll go up and you both can rest and then the doctors on that ward will talk to you both on what is going to happen." The nurse said.
"What is Mr Gaskarth's first name?" The nurse asked.
"Alexander, but he likes to be could Alex." I said and the nurse nodded.
"Alex you going to wake up for me?" The nurse said loudly and Alex grumbled.
"I'm not fucking deaf and let me fucking sleep." Alex said sleepily as he rolled onto his back.
The nurse chuckled.
"Do you know why your here?" The nurse asked.
"I collapsed at work." Alex said.
"Do you know why?" The nurse asked.
"Get Jack to answer your bloody questions, I'm going back to sleep." Alex said and rolled back into his side and went back to sleep.
"Can you answer the questions?" The nurse asked.
"Should be able to so shoot." I said.
"Can you tell me if Alex has any history of eating disorders or mental health?" The nurse asked and he only asked because he noticed Alex's arm.
"Alex has just recently relapsed back into anorexia and self harm after being a year from anorexia and 4 months clean from self harm." I said and looked down.
"Okay, has he got family we can get hold off to tell them he is in hospital." The nurse said.
"Alex has no family. Just me and his friends." I said and the nurse nodded.
"I'll see there is any space on a ward for Alex and get the mental health team to come and talk to him in the morning." The nurse said and I nodded and waited for hours until me and Alex was moved.

I was sat in the chair using my jacket as a pillow on the bed rails trying to get some sleep.
"Sir, would you like to sleep in the relatives room?" A nurse whispered.
"No, he'll freak out if I'm not beside him." I whispered.
"Would you like a pillow? You look very uncomfortable." The nurse said quietly.
"Yeah please." I said quietly which made Alex sigh and his eyes opened.
"You still there Jack?" Alex asked sleepily.
"Yeah I'm still here babe. Go back to sleep." I said.
"Cuddle?" Alex muttered.
"The bed is too small for the both of us. It's not our king bed it's a single bed." I said and Alex sighed.
"Don't care." He muttered and I looked at the nurse.
"If it gives the pair of you a good nights sleep then I'll let you. But no funny business." The nurse said and I smiled as I took my shoes of and walked round the bed and got into the bed and cuddled into Alex's back.
"I'm not moving from your side until you are home okay. I'm here for you." I whispered and kissed Alex's cheek and Alex sighed and he was asleep and it didn't take long for me to fall asleep as well.

Notes

Being in hospital as someone's support worker is the most tiring thing I have ever done.
Its something I don't recommend especially when every time you fall asleep a doctor or a nurse comes along and wakes you up...