Best Mistake

It was 3:55, and I was dreading getting out of my car and going into the coffeehouse to meet Alex. I was so nervous, my stomach so full of butterflies I thought I was going to throw up. After a deep breath, I got out of the car, shivering as I hurried through the November air.

I kept telling myself that everything was going to be ok as I walked through the door, the smell of coffee beans filling my nostrils. I took another deep breath as I looked around the room and I felt my heart stop when I locked eyes with Alex sitting in the back booth. I had to force my feet to walk me over to him.

He stood, offering me a small smile that I returned. I could tell he was trying to decide if he should hug me or shake my hand or something, so I decided to cut out the awkwardness and slid into the booth. "Thank you for meeting me," I said quietly, slipping off my jacket.

He nodded with another small smile. "Can I get you anything? Coffee, or a bagel or something?"

I wasn't a pregnancy expert by any means, but I was sure caffeine wasn't a good bet. I knew if I ate something I'd feel even sicker. I politely declined with a shake of my head.

It was quiet for a moment. Alex was drumming his fingers along the brim of his coffee cup mine were fidgeting under the table. I was getting ready to speak when he cut me off.

"Listen, Whitney. We had a great night together. As much as I hate to admit it, it was awesome. You're a nice girl, but I'm afraid what has already happened is all that will happen. I have a girlfriend," he spoke apologetically.

It took me a second to process what he'd said. When I did, I couldn't help but laugh. "Oh, how I wish that's what this was about," I moaned, earning a confused look from Alex. "I'm not here to confess my love for you," I continued.

Alex seemed to loosen up a bit, slouching in his seat. "Alright then," he smiled. "So what's this about?"

I could feel my throat getting tighter, like it was closing on me. I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, chewing nervously. There was no easy way to say what needed to be said, so I sighed and set my hands down on the table, getting ready to rip off the band aid.

"I'm pregnant," I sighed, then immediately regretted my tone. It sounded too careless to my ears.

Alex seemed a little baffled, laughing nervously while his eyes darted around the room. "Ok..." he said, his voice shaky.

I locked eyes with him. "It's yours," I whispered.

Alex's mouth fell into a flat line. I could see the sweat beads forming on his forehead. His mouth began to twitch like he was trying to find the words to say. "Wh-what?" he finally stuttered.

I had to look away from him once I felt the tears filling my eyes. I shook my head and shrugged. "I'm so sorry, Alex. I didn't mean for this to happen."

I heard him let out an exasperated breath and I looked up at him. His face displayed loud and clear how absolutely panicked he was. His hands gripped the table and he began shaking his head profusely. "No," he whispered. "No!"

I opened my mouth to apologize again when he said, "You're sure it's mine?"

To be honest I was a little offended by his question. "By my calculations, yes," I replied sarcastically.

He ran a hand through his hair angrily. "No. What the fuck. How- what?" I stared at him, trying to give him time to process what he'd just heard. His face softened and his lips quivered like he was about to cry. "What do I tell Sophia?"

I could feel my heart literally break in half. This was the exact opposite of how I wanted this meeting to go, yet it was how I knew it would end up being. I choked back the sob that was threatening to escape and shrugged.

"You don't have to tell her anything if you don't want to," I said, and he glanced up at me. "You don't have to do anything. I'm not trying to get anything out of you with this, Alex. I just wanted you to at least know."

"Right," he said, a look of disgust playing on his face. "Like in eight months you're not going to be calling me again asking for help."

His words stung me. I narrowed my eyes at him and leaned forward a little. "I don't need your help. I just figured you would appreciate knowing you had a child. Maybe, I don't know. I'm still trying to decide if I'm going to keep it." He flinched at the last part and looked down at his folded hands. I was starting to get angry at him. "Why didn't you wear a condom?" I spat.

He shrugged, avoiding eye contact. "We were really really drunk. And I didn't have a condom with me. None of this was supposed to happen."

"But it did," I sighed and leaned back.

He continued staring at his hands. "So what did the doctor say?"

I shifted in my seat. "I haven't been to one yet."

His eyes shot towards me. "So you don't know with absolute certainty that you're pregnant?"

I glared at him. "Unfortunately I'm pretty sure I am. I have a doctors appointment next week though. Check up, usual shit."

He nodded slowly. "You'll let me know, right?"

"Yes," I nodded.

He sighed. "And if you're not?"

"Then we get to move on with our lives. We won't ever speak to each other of this again, or in general for that matter."

Alex nodded again. He seemed to calming down a little. "Well keep me updated."

It was my turn to nod and I gave him a somewhat sarcastic smile as I stood from the booth, putting my jacket back on. He stood and walked behind me out of the coffeeshop, but once we were out the door we went separate ways.

Notes