Can I Say I'm Sorry?

My heart was pounding in my chest. Why had I stood up? I shook my head all the other wedding goers were staring at me as if they were eager to hear what I was going to say. I hadn't planned on saying anything and I knew that if I even tried the words would choke me before they escaped my mouth. I slid past the few other people and walked out the giant doors leaving the chapel. I couldn't watch him marry her, I just couldn't.

I didn't want to hear what was going on, I didn't want to hear the applause that I knew I was going to hear. I went into the bathroom and sat in one of the chairs near the door. I felt the tears run down my face. I grabbed the make up remover wipes because I knew that my makeup was screwed up and I didn't want to try to fix it either. I looked in the mirror and I had definitely looked better than I did now.

I kept waiting for the applause that wasn't coming. How much longer was I going to wait to feel my heart shatter all over again? The eminent feeling was eating at my stomach, I was waiting for the one thing I knew was going to hurt me the most. The longer I had to wait the more it was eating at me and the worse I was feeling.

"Shay," I heard a voice at the bathroom door.

"I'm sorry, I just can't," I whispered.

"Please come out here and talk to me."

"No."

"Shay, I will go in there, I don't care."

I didn't move, I was gripping the sides of the sink looking down into the bowl. I just wanted to break down and I just couldn't. I had fallen in love with Alex and that was the thing I hated the most. I would give anything to never fall in love again because my heart seemed to hurt all the time. I don't know why I had even decided to come to this when I knew it was going to hurt me.

"Come here," the voice said again.

I looked up in the mirror and I saw the familiar caramel haired man behind me. Immediately I ran into his arms, them wrapping around me, pulling me close. I never expected to be like this with him again. My face was pressed into his chest, I could hear his heart beating. Why was he even here? He was getting married, this was his wedding he just walked out of.

"Why are you here Lex," I whispered.

"I don't know, I didn't know you were even here. Who told you and who brought you," he asked against my hair.

"I don't know, Jack brought me as a plus one."

"Really? I didn't know that you guys were together."

"We're not. We've slept together and that's really it."

He rocked me back and forth softly. I still didn't know why he was standing in the girls bathroom hugging me. I felt his lips in my hair again. I had been wanting this for so long and I had it once again except he still wasn't mine.

"Why are you still here, this is your wedding that you're missing," I whispered.

"I don't know. When I saw you stand up, I just had to make sure you were okay," he told me.

"I know I'm so damn late but, I love you Alex. I never stopped loving you. I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm still just afraid of falling for you but, I don't know. I can't watch you marry her. I'm sorry I ever hurt you, I never wanted to I'm just a coward that runs from her fears."

"I never stopped loving you either."

"Was she just a replacement for me?"

"I think she was."

I looked up at him, I hadn't been this close to him in a very long time. Something came over me. I leaned up and pressed my lips to his. I could tell that he was taken aback but he never pushed me away, he simply kissed me back. I felt one of his hands grip the back of my hair. I pulled away from him and looked into his eyes.

"Fuck it," he whispered.

He pressed his lips to mine again. I was spun around and he slammed me into the door for the bathroom stall behind me. For the first time in a long time there was a spark there. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he slipped his tongue into my mouth. I felt his hands on my waist, preventing me from stepping away. I didn't want to by any means but if for some reason I wanted to I couldn't.

"Alex, you're a fucking asshole," a female voice screeched.

Notes

Wait, what?! I hope that was worth the cliffhanger. I also think it's pretty obvious who the woman at the end is. Also, Alex just walked out of his own freaking wedding? What?! I hope y'all like this, I don't know when I'm going to update anything because I'm getting ready to move back into college.

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Title credit: Speak Now - Taylor Swift