Can I Say I'm Sorry?

I looked down examining what was written, not wanting to acknowledge any of them. There was a reason that I was gone just as soon as the wind had finished blowing. I heard a sigh and the door close. I looked up to see Alex was gone leaving the room with the atmosphere tense and awkward. I lowered my head back down and was more then ready to get this recorded so I could leave.

"You've got some nerve coming here, you know that right," Jack said.

"Like I would be her if I had known," I shot back.

"Oh, so you're the one person who had no idea that we were in a band despite the fact that you had been at just about every band practice until you disappeared off the face of the Earth."

"Let me see, first off I need to pay the fucking bills you self-centered asshole. Also, the name is new to me. So maybe, if you actually looked at this from my perspective then you would realize that I'm only still in this room because I need the money to continue to live but what-the fuck-ever. I can start recording now. Rian, how hard do you usually play?"

The drummer stared up at me, "Softer than metal so go kinda gentle, I know your regular style."

"Alright, I can do that," I muttered, walking towards the drumset.

I happily closed the doors that separated the studio and the room outside it. I sat down carefully, I looked down while taking off my shoes to play easier. I waited for the cue to go and just went with ease. Pretty much, all I needed was to be a good player. I always tried to get one take on everything just as a way to kind of prove myself. I felt like I always had to work harder to prove that I could do it and I know that it was stupid but it motivated me every day.

The monotonous sound of the metronome was the only thing that I could hear. Once I finished I looked up and waited for the next command. I could see the look on the guys face, oh yeah, they didn't know that I played drums at all.

"Alright, let's move onto the next song," the man recording said.

I nodded and started with it. It was another one take for me and that made me feel really good on the inside. I was really easy to please when it came down to it I guess.

I was done within a few hours and packed up the few things I had brought with me before slinging my bag on my back again. I felt almost as if I was leaving again, it felt like it was the day of graduation again and I was leaving without another word.

"Thanks Shay, you saved out asses today," Jack said.

"Thanks Jay, means a lot. Glad I could help," I said.

"You want to come get drinks with us? It's been a few years and we have some catching up to do."

"I got nothing else to do, why not?"

I followed the guys of out the room and we found Alex on the couch, making out with Layla, the cute brunette receptionist. The guys sighed, like they were fed up with this. I sighed internally, for some reason I felt something biting inside me. Why did I fucking care? I was the one who ran away, I was the one who abandoned him. I wasn't in a place where I could care.

"Yo Alex, unattach yourself for your girlfriend. We're going to party and she needs to work," Rian said.

"What do you mean you're going to party, there's work that needs to be done," he argued.

This was the first time I got to see his face. Time had done him well and that was a fact. He was beyond attractive. Like he was a dorky kind of cute back in high school but now he was like an angel. His hair had blonde tints in it that I assumed were natural. His hazel eyes stared me up and down. He had grown into his slightly lanky limbs unlike Jack. He was also taller now easily towering over me, not like that was too hard.

"Stop staring Shay," he barked at me. "How are you guys done for the day?"

"I'm a one take musician," I explained, "I pride myself on being done after one time. When I have to make a second take I get disappointed in myself."

"You're not a drummer though."

"Actually, I'm a guitarist, bassist, pianist, drummer and back up vocalist but thank you for your concern."

I flipped my long jet black hair over my shoulder and walked towards the door. He wasn't the only one who had grown older and stronger. While he was an eight, maybe nine at most, I was a solid ten. I had learned what make up looked good on me and what acne I had was completely gone. On top of that I also grew into my awkward limbs and now looked graceful. I carried confidence with ease and paired with the smirk I wore so well. I also had the body that just about any girl would kill for. I think I'm the one who won in the end.

"You coming," I asked, looking back at the guys who were still standing there.

All of them except Alex followed me to the parking lot. The got into a Mustang and an Escort. The boys had a thing for Ford it seemed like. I wasn't sure what to do so I just kind of stood there awkwardly.

"You didn't drive," Jack asked.

"Naw, I live like two blocks from here and I only own a motorcycle so I walked," I explained.

"Get in."

I got into the passenger seat of the Mustang and looked over at Jack. He looked quite different then he had four years ago. Then again, time really does change things and it keeps seeming like it did for the better.

"I was wondering something," he started, "Rian might not have his arm healed by the time we go on tour. Would you be interested because you're the only drummer that I've seen knock it out that easily. We need that."

"I think so, I'll need to check my calendar once I get those dates, I might need to be in a studio or even on a different tour. I'm going out with Sixx: AM at some point so it really depends," I explained.

"Sounds like you live an exciting life."

"You probably have a more exciting life, but you don't even know at this point."

We both laughed. I looked over at Jack and smiled. I never thought I would see any of these dorks again so it was really refreshing. Yeah, he had a right to be angry at first, I would be angry if I was in his place. I guess the fact that I pretty much did them a solid despite the history between us. Also, he probably saw things from my point of view once I spat them at him.

"You know he's probably kicking himself in there," Jack said.

"What do you mean," I asked.

"Well, compare you to his girlfriend. That and damn you're talented I mean, if I was him I would be kicking myself. Like you were hot before but now, wow."

"Thanks Jack, means a lot."

"You know he still loves you right?"

"You know I don't love him right?"

Notes

I just wanted to keep writing this cause I really enjoy where it's going and I hope y'all enjoy reading it. Do you think Shay is gonna go on tour with the guys? I really hope y'all are enjoying this as much as I'm enjoying writing it. This will probably be the last update until next week or the week after because I have song ideas so I'm going to be working on that which is exciting because I haven't had any in months!

Leave a rate and a comment if you enjoyed :)

Title Credit: The One - Theory of a Deadman