What Did You Expect From Me?

The next morning, Mackenzie immediately regretted drinking before she even opened her eyes. Her head was pounding and her body was sore. Mackenzie began to stretch herself out, but when she hit something next to her, she froze and shot her eyes open. What Mackenzie saw made her groan. Alex was lying next to her, with his mouth wide open, emitting loud snores. Then Mackenzie took notice that he wasn't wearing a shirt and looked down to check herself.

"God damn it," she groaned when she realized she, too, wasn't wearing any clothes.

Mackenzie quickly jumped out of bed and ran straight to her bathroom. She turned her shower on and began to scrub every inch of her body, cleaning herself of last night's events. While she was in the shower, Alex began to stir. He heard his phone ringing nonstop and he just wanted it to end, so he answered the phone without checking the caller ID.

"What?" He groaned, clearly annoyed.

"What? Wow. That's a nice way to greet your fiancé," Brooke retorted.

This statement cause Alex to shoot up from his lying position. "Oh, hey Brooke. I'm sorry, I just woke up," he answered certainly feeling more alert.

"Who is MJ?" Brooke spat, venom lacing her voice.

"What do you mean 'Who is MJ'?"

"Alex, I saw a video from your show last night. I saw you profess your love for someone named MJ. Then you apologized for the last four years, and then again for the past five months. I have a good idea who MJ is, but I want to hear you say it," Brooke seethed.

"Fine, Brooke. MJ is your sister. I confessed my love for your sister," Alex huffed, rubbing his face in frustration.

"You know what, Alex? I love you. And I can't believe I'm about to say this. But we're done. I don't want to be your second choice. Mackenzie is back in your life. She's always going to be number one. So go after her. I don't want to play this game," Brooke stated, clearly on the verge of tears now.

"No, Brooke. Please. We can work this out. I don't want these past four years to go to waste," Alex pleaded, even though he wasn't sure why.

"No, Alex. You still love Mackenzie. You said so yourself. I'm by no means happy about it, but I understand. If my first love walked back into my life, I'd probably want to go back to him, too. Plus, you live in right outside Los Angeles. Mackenzie is a better fit because I know you don't want to move back to Baltimore, and I don't want to live in California," Brooke sniffles, so I'll trying to keep her tears at bay.

"Jesus Christ, Brooke! Mackenzie doesn't want me! It doesn't matter if I live out here. She doesn't want to hurt you. I'll never be with her again!" Alex yelled into the phone.

"See, that's the thing, Alex. Mackenzie may not want you, but you made it clear that you want her. I refuse to compete with her for you. I will see you next month when you're back in Baltimore. Goodbye, Alexander."

And with that, Brooke hung up. Alex whipped his phone across the room in a fit of rage. But when he looked to see where it fell, he finally realized that he wasn't in his room. He wasn't even in his house. He looked around and saw his clothes scattered on the floor, then he looked at the nightstand beside him. Sitting on the nightstand was a picture of Mackenzie and Lindsey. Then the night before hit Alex like a ton of bricks.

He buried his head in his hands and muttered, "What the hell did I do?"

Not even thirty seconds later, Mackenzie walked into the bedroom only wearing a towel wrapped loosely around herself. Her feet padding against the floor caught Alex's attention, causing him to look up and just stare at the woman walking past him. When he realized she was only in a towel, his eyes nearly bulged out of his head. Mackenzie felt his eyes boring into her, but she ignored him and walked straight into her closet. She reemerged about two minutes later, fully dressed, while Alex was still in the same spot on her bed, his hands cradling his head once again.

"Hey, Alex" Mackenzie spoke softly, leaning against the closet door frame.

He pulled his head from his hands again and looked over to the younger girl.

"Hey, MJ. Uh, let me just get dressed and I'll be out of your hair."

"No rush," Mackenzie smiled. "I'm going to meet up with Jack and the guys, so I figured I'd just bring you with me."

"Oh okay. Where are you meeting them?" Alex questioned.

Mackenzie then pulled out her phone and showed Alex the address Jack had sent her earlier.

"Okay, well for starters, this is my house," Alex chuckled. "So yea, it would make sense for you to bring me with you."

"Jack just invites people over your house?" Mackenzie asked, confused.

"Yea, pretty much. He has his own apartment, not too far from here actually. All the guys have apartments throughout LA, but they'd all prefer to be at my house. It makes sense, I guess," Alex explained, just shrugging his shoulders.

"Alright, well I'm going to finish getting ready," Mackenzie stated, before returning back to her bathroom.

Alex took this as his cue to get ready, so when Mackenzie was back in the bathroom, he jumped out of bed and grabbed his clothes that were scattered around the floor. When he looked presentable, Alex walked down the stairs to wait for Mackenzie in the kitchen, but after stepping off the last stair, he nearly tripped over Mackenzie's heels from the night before.

"MJ, pick a better spot for your shoes!" He called up to her before going to sit at her kitchen counter.

About ten minutes later, Mackenzie finally descended the stairs. As she walked, Alex took in her appearance. She was wearing a Green Day shirt with rips going down the side, almost to the hem of the shirt. Her ribs and bra could easily be seen through the sides. She was wearing black shorts, that hardly covered anything. And finally Alex noticed that she was wearing beat up, black combat boots. Her hair was up in a messy bun with a wide black head band, and the only makeup she was sporting was mascara. Alex couldn't help but think of how beautiful Mackenzie was without all the makeup on her face like the previous night.

"Alex, stop staring," Mackenzie laughed as she picked up her heels and clutch.

She placed the clutch on the table and dropped the heels by the table leg. In turn, she grabbed her keys and wallet and dragged Alex to the front door. They exited the loft and Mackenzie locked the door behind them. As they walked down the stairs and out of the building, a silence fell over the pair. And by the time they got into Mackenzie's Jeep and started driving, the silence became uncomfortable.

"So, about last night..." Alex said in attempt to ease the tension, but unintentionally made it worse.

Mackenzie took a deep breath before speaking. "Last night shouldn't have happened. I was drunk and feeling nostalgic. You just missed Brooke and I was the next best thing. I get it."

"Stop it, Mackenzie," Alex started, almost sounding angry. "You know damn well that last night meant something. And besides, Brooke is the least of my concerns. The wedding is off. She dumped me this morning because she saw a video from the show last night. She told me she didn't want to come second to you. And sadly, she's right. Any woman will always come second to you."

"Alex, that's bull. I heard you fighting on the phone with her. You were basically begging her not to break things off," Mackenzie spat.

"Well, if you heard me fighting with her, you must have heard me say that you didn't want to be with me. If I still didn't love you, why would that thought even cross my mind?" Alex countered.

"Whatever. You're eventually going to go home to Baltimore and you'll get back with Brooke. I'll just be apart of your past, again," Mackenzie said a little too calmly for Alex's liking.

In turn, he just stared at her with a loss for words. He couldn't believe how stubborn she was being. She knew his feelings towards her and she still tried telling him that he was supposed to be with her sister. This was not the Mackenzie Alex knew six years ago. His Mackenzie would never doubt what was spewing from his mouth, whether it was true or not. In that moment, Alex decided he wasn't going to try to win her back, because she obviously didn't care. But Alex also knew he didn't want to go back to Brooke. Maybe he needed to be on his own for a bit. But while Alex was having his own internal debate, Mackenzie was having her own. She wished that she could be with Alex again. She wanted nothing more than for things to be how they once were. But her moving to California six years ago changed her. She became her own person. She learned how to be independent. She even made a name for herself in the workplace and she feared that by getting back with Alex, she would lose it all. She did not want to become the person she once was. But Mackenzie's internal debate was cut short when she pulled into Alex's driveway.

"Alex, this isn't a house, it's practically a mansion," Mackenzie spoke as she looked at his expensive looking two story house in awe.

"Well, when you have intentions to settle down sooner or later, why not be one step ahead of the game? And the guys are always here anyway, so it makes sense to have a larger house," Alex explained before exiting the Jeep and heading up the pathway towards his house.

Mackenzie quickly followed suit, but once she got to the doorway, Alex was nowhere to be seen. Although he left the open, Mackenzie had no clue which way to go once she stepped inside the house. She closed the door behind her and turned around to come face to face with Zack and Casey.

"What are you doing here?" Casey asked, cocking her head to the side in confusion.

"Uh, Jack asked me to come over and hang out," Mackenzie responded, suddenly becoming nervous under her friend's gaze.

"Oh, he's in the backyard with Ri. Come on, I'll show you where it is," Zack smiled, leading Mackenzie through the dining room and the granite and stainless steel kitchen.

On the far wall of the kitchen, there were two double doors that were wide open. She could hear laughing coming from the other side of the doors, so Mackenzie figured that would be the yard. She stepped over the threshold and saw Rian throw Jack into the deep end of the pool. Mackenzie shook her head chuckling at the sight before her as she walked over to the patio table. She placed her belongings down, then walked over to the side of the pool where Rian was standing.

"Ri Guy!" She shouted, gaining Rian's attention.

He quickly turned his head and shouted back at Mackenzie. "Mack Attack!"

Rian then proceed to engulf Mackenzie in a hug, causing said girl to laugh, "My god, I've missed those hugs."

Mackenzie and Rian were the best of friends before she left. They instantly clicked when Alex officially introduced her to the guys. Mackenzie knew the boys of All Time Low before dating Alex, but not on personal levels. She always ended up talking to Rian at parties, but they were just drunken conversations that meant nothing the next day. So when Mackenzie started getting serious with Alex, she was actually able to form a friendship with Rian. But seeing him again made her instantly regret leaving all those years ago. She finally realized, she didn't just leave Alex behind, she left so many people and hurt them more than she ever intended.

"Don't guilt trip yourself, Mackenzie. The past is in the past. You did what you felt necessary. I never held that against you, and I never will," Rian whispered, causing Mackenzie's face to light up.

He pulled her into another hug, as a way to reinforce what he had just told her. But as Rian held the tiny girl in his arms, he decided that he needed payback. And that payback was throwing Mackenzie in the pool fully clothed. The splash gained Jack's attention from the other other side of the pool, and when Mackenzie resurfaced, both boys broke out in hysterics.

"Awe, is Mackenzie all wet now?" Jack tried teasing.

"Guys, I don't have another set of clothes with me," Mackenzie pouted as she slammed her fists against the surface of the water.

"Relax, Mack," Rian laughed. "My girlfriend, Cassadee, stays here a lot. I'll just let you borrow some of her clothes that she's left here."

"Or I could just steal Brooke's clothes," Mackenzie concluded as she pulled herself out of the pool and kicked her combat boots off.

Rian and Jack just looked at each other and then back to Mackenzie, confusion all over their faces. Mackenzie knew she was missing something.

"Mack, Brooke hasn't been here since Alex bought the house a year ago. She refuses to come to California. That's why nobody understand how her and Alex are getting married. He refuses to move back to Baltimore and she refuses to move out here," Rian explained.

Mackenzie just nodded her head. Now it made sense to her why Brooke had the idea that Alex would go after her. He was in Los Angeles more than home and without Brooke being here, Alex could essentially do whatever he wanted without Brooke finding out. But in Mackenzie's defense, she lived fifteen minutes away from Alex for the past year and hadn't seen him once. She found this odd though, since his house was on her jogging route. Knowing that he lived here made Mackenzie wonder how she really had never seen him at least once, but yet ran into him Baltimore, even though neither one on them lived there anymore.

"Don't overthink, Kenz. You're here to have a good time before you go back to work to tomorrow. So let's go inside and get changed and have a good time," Jack encouraged.

Mackenzie smiled and walked back over towards the patio. She grabbed one of the towels that was left outside and she wrapped it around herself. She then grabbed her belongings off of the table and followed Jack and Rian back inside. But when they entered the kitchen, Jack and Rian stopped in their tracks, and since Mackenzie wasn't paying attention, she walked right into Jack's back. When she came back down to earth, she turned to see what caused them to stop short, and Mackenzie didn't like what she saw at all. Alex was sitting at his kitchen island, still wearing his clothes from last night. His eyes looked tired and sad. But the worst past was that he now had a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels sitting in front of him and it was only one in the afternoon.

"Yo, Alex. You're finally home," Jack started, completely unaware that Alex had been brought back by Mackenzie. "What's wrong?"

"Well, for starters, Brooke dumped me," Alex slurred.

"Isn't that a good thing though since you really didn't want to marry her?" Rian questioned.

"Yea, but the girl I'm still desperately in love with isn't the same person I once knew. So that sucks," Alex elaborated before taking another swig from the bottle, never breaking eye contact with Mackenzie.

"Alex, don't even go there. Time changes people. And in my case, time just made me grow up," Mackenzie fired back.

"Whatever. I'm going out. Maybe I'll grow up, too," Alex spat, before taking another shot of the whiskey and exiting the kitchen, bottle of whiskey in hand.

"Kenzie, don't let him get to you," Jack said in a soothing voice, trying to make her feel better.

"No Jack. It's fine. He forgave me too fast. He deserves to be mad. I can handle it," Mackenzie replied, trying to defend the man that could be heard stomping around upstairs.

"But this isn't how Alex acts when he's mad. This is how he acts when he's heartbroken," Rian added.

"This is how he acted when you left. So unless you somehow ripped his heart out again, he has no reason to be acting the way he is," Jack explained.

Mackenzie automatically felt guilty when her mind drifted to the car ride to the house. Rian picked up on the uneasiness written across her face.

"Mackenzie, what happened?"

"Rian, I didn't mean it!" Mackenzie cried out. " I didn't want to tell him last night actually meant something to me, so I lied to save my ass. And now he's acting like this."

"What happened last night?" Jack hissed.

"He came home with me last night. You can imagine what happened. But Jack, I didn't think he cared that much!" Mackenzie huffed, trying to defend herself and keep her tears from spilling over.

"Mack, calm down. We're not blaming you. Alex is an idiot. Jack will look after him and you can just spend the day with me instead. Alex responds better to Jack, and we need to catch up, so it works out," Rian concluded.

Mackenzie just nodded. She watched as Jack parted ways and ran upstairs. Rian then disappeared and came back seconds later with dry clothes for Mackenzie. He showed her where the bathroom was, so when she was alone, she stripped off the wet clothes and replaced them with warm, dry ones. When she was done getting changed, Rian was already back in the kitchen waiting for her. She noticed Alex and Jack were gone, due to the house becoming so quiet. Mackenzie couldn't help but pray that Alex wouldn't do something stupid while he was out and clearly intoxicated.

When Jack came in three hours later with his arm wrapped around a basically unconscious Alex, she knew that her ex had over done it. It wasn't even five in the evening yet, and he was passed out from drinking too much. The sight in front of Mackenzie made her want to comfort him, but she knew that was probably the last thing he would want. But eventually her heart won the battle over her head. When Jack returned from putting Alex in his room, she ran upstairs to make sure he was okay. She entered every room until she found his, but it didn't take very long due to his loud snores, yet again. She went and sat on the side of the bed, and Alex began to stir.

"Mackenzie?" He slurred with both eyes squinting at her.

"Yea, it's me," she whispered in response.

"Where did I go wrong with you?" He asked suddenly.

Mackenzie was taken aback by the question, but quickly recovered. "Alex, don't blame yourself. I made the decision on my own. I'm the reason we went wrong."

"I still love you, Mackenzie. We'll always be together, somewhere in Neverland," Alex whispered before falling back asleep almost instantly.

"Yea, somewhere in Neverland," Mackenzie smiled down at the older man, recounting the old memories that tied around that phrase.

As Mackenzie left Alex's room, she wished she was young again. She wished she had never left. And she certainly wished that she never broke the man who did nothing but show her how much he loved and valued her. But like he said, they were happy together, somewhere in Neverland.

Notes