Angel in Shining Armor

I’ve pissed him off.
What kind of angel am I, really?
My job- hell, my sole purpose is look out for him and be his helpful conscience. The problem is, I’m not helpful at all.
Or maybe I kinda am, I guess.
I mean, I did stop him from killing himself.
I even went as far as removing the bullet while his eyes were closed. Not an easy act, but when you’re a guardian angel you learn to remove what you need to quickly, without getting caught or destroying the natural order of things.
But because I did this, Alex actually hates my guts.
And when I tried to talk it out with him outside of school, he got bullied and blamed it on me. And sure it made me feel kinda shitty, but it was also pretty harsh of him to say.
I’m a guardian, all I do is advise against and occasionally remove danger. I don’t have actual control over him, or any other humans. And I can’t see the future, I can only predict it. I’d give myself an 85% accuracy rate.
Anyway, I know he isn’t supposed to see me in the first place, but I just can’t have him hating me.
I don’t know, it’s stupid, but I always wanna be on good terms with Alex. I just can’t go on watching him for the rest of his life knowing he hates me. Also, he needs a friend, and the kids at school are dickheads.

I was just trying to wait for the perfect moment to try to talk to him again. I realized doing it publicly was a very bad idea.
Sigh.
So, I just stayed hidden until he got home. It was usually the worst part of the day. Well, for me, at least. I always had to watch him break down and not do anything about it.

I watched as he ran up the stairs to his room, slammed the door shut, and proceeded to cry his eyes out.
I felt very awful knowing it was my fault Alex was so upset.
Well.. That, and the fact that he’s officially failed three Spanish tests in a row. I sure do wish I could just give him all the answers, but that isn’t my job. He can’t live without making mistakes.
I braced myself for whatever emotional outburst would be aimed my way, then made myself visible, choosing to sit beside his curled up, sobbing figure on the bed.
“Hey.” I started, causing him to jump a bit in surprise and look up from where he was crying into his pillow.
“W-what are you doing here?! Get out!” He began to crawl back away from me, but stopped when he reached the edge of the bed.
“Look.. I-I just wanted to talk to you.” I sighed, seeing his expression change into an angrier one.
“Talk?! You wanna talk?! About what? About how there’s some creepy guy who suddenly popped into my life claiming to be my guardian angel, but then doesn’t actually protect me and only makes things worse??”
I sighed, shaking my head.
“I’ve done a lot for you, Alex.. But I’m no miracle worker. More like a mentor.”
“A mentor? Well thanks for the help getting me soaked in mud. I had to change into these dumb office clothes, and I got made fun of for the rest of the day.” He spat bitterly.
“Yeah, I know.” I sighed, apologetically. “I just wanted to say sorry for just popping up like that. I-I shouldn’t have.”
“You know, for a guardian angel you sure do make a lot of mistakes.”
That’s when I gave him a frown of confusion.
“I made one mistake..”
“Correction- two. You’ve made two mistakes.” He glared at me, actually resulting in making me really upset.
“Stopping you from killing yourself was not a mistake, Alex! It was intentional! You can’t just do that!” I exclaimed, getting almost as worked up as he was.
“What the fuck did you do to my gun?? Was that you who unloaded it?!”
“Yes. I couldn’t let you do it.”
He groaned and narrowed his eyes at me in a very hateful manner.
“What the fuck?! If you really knew me and actually wanted to save me, you would’ve let me do it!” And that’s when the tears came back to his eyes, and he began to break down again.
He was putting up an angry front, but of course I knew that he was just broken inside.
I sighed, and scooted closer to him to pull him into my chest.
He didn’t bother to resist it; instead, he gave in and proceeded to cry into my chest.
I rubbed his back soothingly with one hand, while stroking his hair with the other, knowing that’s an easy way to calm him down. That’s what his mother used to do when he got upset. I hoped it would comfort him, rather than bring back unwanted memories.
And luckily, the former occurred.
His sobbing eventually ceased to little sniffles, and his eyes closed as he began to relax and fall asleep.
I guess I didn’t suck after all, huh?
I continued to comfort him and allowed the broken boy to sleep for a while. I knew that he needed a break before his dad and step-mom got home.
Poor kid.

Notes

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Title cred: Carry Me- Papa Roach