Love Notes and Long Distance
Hate Me
You made me compliment myself
When it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away
That I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart
To leave me behind
“Vic, please,” I pleaded.
“I don’t want to hurt you Jay and you know that,” he whispered, stroking my cheek.
“You won’t I promise.”
He grabbed my hand, kissing it gently. His eyes showed nothing but compassion for me. They were absolutely beautiful, kind of like Alex’s in a way. That was the boy that hadn’t crossed my mind recently. Instead of wild blonde hair that seemed almost like a halo I saw long brown hair in my thoughts. Instead of beanies I grew used to seeing snapbacks. Instead of the boy a few inches shorter than me I now thought only of one who made me appear taller than I was. I still thought of a vocalist but now he sung in a higher pitch. He didn’t have a tattoo that he got one night when we were less than sober. Vic was the only thing that crossed my mind, not Alex.
“This isn’t fair to Alex,” Vic whispered.
“I know,” I whispered.
“Jay, this isn’t you.”
“Yes it is, Vic, I swear it is.”
“Weren’t you telling me about how you and Alex started dating the other day? About how you had adored him for months before your friend dared him to kiss you. How ever since that kiss everything was completely different. It was like you were seeing the sun for the first time. Don’t you still feel the same?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
Vic carefully moved the fringe out of my eyes, staring deeply into my brown eyes. His eyes weren’t like the hazel that I had grown accustomed to. He smelled different than Alex always did but now he smelled almost more like home. He was more like home than Alex had been. Alex hadn’t been going out of his way to call me, I mean neither did I but it just seemed like he didn’t care anymore. He never let me talk to any of his friends or anything of that sort. I would have if I had other friends other than Vic and well I didn’t let Alex talk to Vic last time due to my intoxication.
“Jay, you will have to tell Alex. I refuse to be your sideho. Break up with him next time you talk to him,” he whispered.
“I will,” I spoke softly.
The smaller boy climbed into my lap, straddling it with ease. His arms connected around my neck, holding us rather close. I pressed my lips against his, they molded together with ease. I felt his hands tangle in my hair, pulling it tightly. I rested my hands on his hips merely because I didn’t want to do something I would regret. I licked his lip gently, desperate for access which he quickly granted. He tasted different than Alex. It felt good to have someone against me, to have someone this close. It had been a while, I’m pretty sure the last time was when Alex and I had going away sex.
“Jack,” Vic moaned as I palmed him softly.
He bit my lip, tugging it softly. I couldn’t help but moan as Vic pushed his body flush against mine. I grabbed his ass and pushed him down onto the bed we were laying on. I hovered over him, him looking so innocent under me. He pulled my neck down, aggressively attaching our lips back together. He pushed my shirt up, telling me to take it off. I quickly did as he asked and reattached our lips. My phone rang from it’s place on the desk and I chose to ignore it. After two or three rings it went off only to ring again.
“You should get that,” Vic panted, looking up at me.
“If it’s important they’ll leave a message,” I whispered against his neck.
“They’ve called a few times already.”
“Fine.”
I got off the bed, leaving Vic there with him panting. I looked down at the phone on the table and saw it ringing. For the first time in a while Alex’s name was lit up on the screen. Why was he calling me? I couldn’t break up with him right now meaning I was going to break my promise to Vic. Why was I so horrible?
When it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away
That I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart
To leave me behind
“Vic, please,” I pleaded.
“I don’t want to hurt you Jay and you know that,” he whispered, stroking my cheek.
“You won’t I promise.”
He grabbed my hand, kissing it gently. His eyes showed nothing but compassion for me. They were absolutely beautiful, kind of like Alex’s in a way. That was the boy that hadn’t crossed my mind recently. Instead of wild blonde hair that seemed almost like a halo I saw long brown hair in my thoughts. Instead of beanies I grew used to seeing snapbacks. Instead of the boy a few inches shorter than me I now thought only of one who made me appear taller than I was. I still thought of a vocalist but now he sung in a higher pitch. He didn’t have a tattoo that he got one night when we were less than sober. Vic was the only thing that crossed my mind, not Alex.
“This isn’t fair to Alex,” Vic whispered.
“I know,” I whispered.
“Jay, this isn’t you.”
“Yes it is, Vic, I swear it is.”
“Weren’t you telling me about how you and Alex started dating the other day? About how you had adored him for months before your friend dared him to kiss you. How ever since that kiss everything was completely different. It was like you were seeing the sun for the first time. Don’t you still feel the same?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
Vic carefully moved the fringe out of my eyes, staring deeply into my brown eyes. His eyes weren’t like the hazel that I had grown accustomed to. He smelled different than Alex always did but now he smelled almost more like home. He was more like home than Alex had been. Alex hadn’t been going out of his way to call me, I mean neither did I but it just seemed like he didn’t care anymore. He never let me talk to any of his friends or anything of that sort. I would have if I had other friends other than Vic and well I didn’t let Alex talk to Vic last time due to my intoxication.
“Jay, you will have to tell Alex. I refuse to be your sideho. Break up with him next time you talk to him,” he whispered.
“I will,” I spoke softly.
The smaller boy climbed into my lap, straddling it with ease. His arms connected around my neck, holding us rather close. I pressed my lips against his, they molded together with ease. I felt his hands tangle in my hair, pulling it tightly. I rested my hands on his hips merely because I didn’t want to do something I would regret. I licked his lip gently, desperate for access which he quickly granted. He tasted different than Alex. It felt good to have someone against me, to have someone this close. It had been a while, I’m pretty sure the last time was when Alex and I had going away sex.
“Jack,” Vic moaned as I palmed him softly.
He bit my lip, tugging it softly. I couldn’t help but moan as Vic pushed his body flush against mine. I grabbed his ass and pushed him down onto the bed we were laying on. I hovered over him, him looking so innocent under me. He pulled my neck down, aggressively attaching our lips back together. He pushed my shirt up, telling me to take it off. I quickly did as he asked and reattached our lips. My phone rang from it’s place on the desk and I chose to ignore it. After two or three rings it went off only to ring again.
“You should get that,” Vic panted, looking up at me.
“If it’s important they’ll leave a message,” I whispered against his neck.
“They’ve called a few times already.”
“Fine.”
I got off the bed, leaving Vic there with him panting. I looked down at the phone on the table and saw it ringing. For the first time in a while Alex’s name was lit up on the screen. Why was he calling me? I couldn’t break up with him right now meaning I was going to break my promise to Vic. Why was I so horrible?
Notes
Don't hate me forever please. It was destined to happen which means that Alex was right in the last chapter. So, I have a flat tire and I have to go home tomorrow which is a four hour drive and now I get to sit in a garage tomorrow make my trip longer. Sigh.
Drop a rate and a comment if you enjoy :)
Title and lyric credit: Hate Me - Blue October
@Carebear
Thanks :) we currently have two songs near done and I think we're going for seven. Jack feels bad though. Something may happen though.
1/17/16