“I don’t want to talk about it Jack.” I mutter for what seems to be the hundredth time today.

Jack kicked Alex out shortly after our little incident. He’s been pacing the bedroom floor angrily, asking me over and over what was said between us last night.

“I just don’t get it. Why are you protecting him if he just fucked you over like that? He HIT you Em. I swear I want to go punch his face in so badly.” He hops on his toes staring at the ceiling. I can see his muscles tense with anger and frustration.

“He’s still a person Jack. Yeah, he was a total ass to me right now but he was high. I’m sure when he comes down from it, everything will be back to normal.” I assure him, or maybe myself.

But I was wrong.

Monday came around quicker than expected. We hadn’t heard a single word from Alex the entire weekend. Jack kept me close to him as we walked through the hallways. I passed Alex, but he didn’t even look up at me. It was as if I didn’t even exist to him any longer.

Our classes flew by quickly and painlessly. It wasn’t until I was walking to lunch did Jack bring Alex up.

“So Alex got called out of class today by the principal.” He starts.

“What? Why?” I stare up at him in shock.

“I have no idea. Knowing Alex, it wasn’t for an award. Maybe that asshole is finally getting what he deserves.” Jack rolls his eyes.

“Stop talking about him like that.” I snap.

“Why do you continue to defend him? I don’t understand it Emma. There’s something you aren’t telling me and it’s really starting to piss me off. We are in a relationship, aren’t we supposed to tell each other everything? Why is he so important to you that you can’t tell me?” Jack stops me in the middle of the hallway. “I don’t understand this.”

“I’m sorry.” I murmur, avoiding his gaze that I feel boring into my soul. “It’s not my secret to share. Jack you know I love you. I would tell you but I really don’t want to betray Alex like that.”

“You mean like the way he betrayed you by hitting you? Are you forgetting that even happened?”

I remain silent for a moment before turning to Jack slowly. “I’m sorry but I’m not going to tell you. I didn’t forget what happened between Alex and I. It was wrong of him to do that, I know it was. I’m not going to retaliate by telling you his deepest darkest secrets that he was scared to tell anyone. If he gives me permission, I’ll tell you. But until then, I would appreciate if you just relaxed Jack. Please. Let’s just not talk about him for now, okay?” I slide my hand into Jack’s and look up at him pleading.

He looks down at me for a moment, his stern glare faltering. “You drive me crazy.” He sighs placing a kiss on my forehead.

Jack hugs me tightly and I return the hug, happy to be past all of this. All of a sudden, the hug stiffens and I pull away, glancing up at Jack. I follow his glare and lock eyes with Alex.

To be blunt, Alex looked like hell. He had dark circles under his bloodshot eyes and his hair is messy, but without order. His legs are cloaked in grey sweatpants and his biceps are exposed by his black tank top. Alex continues to stare at me, his expression lost. I can’t tear my eyes away from his.

Without warning, Jack rips his hand away from mine and charges at Alex.

“What the hell are you looking at jackass?” Jack growls, getting right in front of Alex.

Alex’s gaze shifts from me, to Jack. He doesn’t seem frightened or scared. He seems empty.

“Back the fuck off.” Jack bumps his body against Alex’s forcefully, causing Alex to loose his footing slightly.

He stumbles back but regains composure quickly. He doesn’t say anything to either of us, but walks away.

“Jack.” I reach out to grab his arm. “I know you are just trying to help but please, don’t get like this. It scares me.”

He turns around slowly to face me. His eyes are clouded with anger and his jaw is clenched tightly. “Sorry.” He mutters.

“Let’s just go to lunch.” I try to pull him towards me but he doesn’t move.

“We should spend our lunch time separate today. I’m sorry babe, but honestly Alex has me so damn pissed I just need to be alone. I promise I’ll find you right after lunch.” He explains softly, the look of fury still lingering in his eyes.

“Okay.” I nod slowly. “Just be safe okay?”

He leans down and kisses my lips gently in response. I lace my arms around his neck, pulling myself closer to him. He returns the kiss but pushes me off softly. I nod in understanding and we separate down the halls.

I don’t tell Jack this, but I’m a little relieved he wanted lunch alone. I’ve wanted to talk to Alex ever since the incident. Yes, what he did was crazy messed up, but I know that’s not Alex. I don’t give a shit what he says about “not trusting the enemy”. That’s not the Alex that revealed himself to me. I know how substances can affect or alter somebody’s character. I lived with two alcoholics for crying out loud. It’s something Jack doesn’t understand, although I don’t expect him to. People who don’t deal with addicts or know what substance users are like don’t know how to handle them.

I race down the halls I watched Alex walk away through. I push past people, trying to find him frantically. I only have one lunch period but that’s all I need. I run, accidentally bumping into a teacher, causing him to drop his contents.

“I’m so sorry!” I cry, helping him pick up his papers. “I was just looking for someone.”

“It’s okay. Anyone I might know?” He acts as if nothing happened.

“Alex Gaskarth?”

“Ah yes.” He replies slowly, coldly. “Mr. Gaskarth is outside smoking as always, even though we clearly have a no smoking rule at this school. I was watching him through my window deliberating whether to call the principal on him or not. I figured I shouldn’t do that to him twice in one day so I let it go.”

“Twice?” I bunch my eyebrows together in confusion.

“Let’s just say, he turned in quite the disturbing paper.” The man sighs before making his way past me. “Have a good day Miss…?”

“Emma.” I reply. “Thank you.”

As I say my name, I see a flash of recognition cross his eyes. “Wait, Emma. Be careful. I’m not going to get into detail, but your name was mentioned in that alarming paper.”

Before I can ask any further questions, the teacher makes his way down the hall. I shake my head slowly and glance out the window from the doorway. Alex is sitting against a tree, stubbing out a cigarette and already pulling another from the pack. I half smile and walk quickly to meet him out there.

I stand in front of him. He continues to stare straight ahead, not even registering that I’m there. I kneel down to come into his line of sight. All of a sudden, his eyes shift and lock with mine.

“Hey.” I say softly.

His eyes flash with fear as I speak. He remains silent.

“Can we talk?” I ask.

Silence.

“Ok well I’ll talk.” I sigh, sitting down in front of him. “Look I know what you did was wrong and I know you know that too. Alex that wasn’t you. I’m not stupid. You were under the influence and made a stupid decision. Well you didn’t, the cocaine did. Look, I’m okay. I’m not angry with you, but I am concerned. I need Alex back. The one I know. The one I talked to in the middle of the night on Friday. This angry, druggie Alex is not the guy who revealed himself to me. You can spout that ‘Never trust the enemy’ shit but I’m not buying it. Jack is pissed beyond words at you and pretty angry with me for not being mad at you. I just can’t find it in myself to be. So I just wanted you to know that I’m not mad. I forgive you, even though you didn’t apologize. Can we just talk?”

Alex looks at me incredulously. His eyes darken with anger. “No.” He mutters angrily. “No. Stay angry at me Emma Jones. Stay so angry that you never want to talk to me again. That’s what you need. You need to stay the hell away from me. I’m bad news. You and Jack are off the hook. I’m going to keep Sasha distracted but please for the love of fucking god, stay the hell away. I’m not playing a game with you.” He spits the last words and stands up.

“I’ll wait.” I reply simply.

He looks down at me, his eyebrows bunched in confusion. A look of amusement passes through his features. “What?”

“I’ll wait.” I repeat slowly.

“For what?”

“For you to come back. There isn’t anything you can do to scare me away Alexander. I’ve dealt with bullying for almost my entire life, and I know that you will stop at some point. Scare me, hurt me, do what you want, but at the end of the day you are going to be the one sleeping with the guilt of knowing what you are doing to the one person you chose to trust.” I stand up and hug his frigid body. “I’ll wait.”

Without waiting for a response, I walk back to the school hallway. I glance behind me to catch Alex glaring at me, with a hint of amusement in his angry eyes.

Notes

Hello c: Short-ish chapter, sorry about that. Been crazy busy with college starting back up and vacations and family visits. Let me know what you think c:
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PS Full Frontal was finally back! I don't know about you, but I was super pumped Monday.