Stop fucking around with my emotions.

*Jack's pov*

He just fucking left. He could have ignored the call, she would have fucking called back for fuck sake. But he didn't, he just left me hanging, he didn't even let me finish what I was going to say. That just showed me something, something that had been in my mind for a while but I hadn't wanted to accept; I didn't mean as much to Alex as I thought I did.

And this realisation hit me hard.
I pulled my knees up to my chest, staring at the wall of the bus. He didn't care, he probably never cared. Before I even realised what was happening, Zack had made himself comfortable with his head against my shoulder.

“Why are you crying Jack?” He asked. He didn't sound like he was mocking me or judging me; he sounded concerned. I moved my hand to my cheek, shocked to find that it was in fact wet.
I guess I had to tell somebody, since Alex didn't want to listen, and I knew I could trust Zack.

“Zack... Have you ever wanted someone you knew you couldn't have? Someone you KNOW you shouldn't want? But you wanted them anyway?” I sighed, looking down at him, frowning slightly. He opened his eyes and smiled at me sadly.

”We all want someone we can't have, Jack.” He stated quietly, sounding as if he knew from experience. I closed my eyes and thought about what Zack said. Shortly after, I felt sobs racking through my chest, producing harsh choking noises. Zack sat up and pulled me to him, letting my cry into his shirt. He rubbed large, soothing circles into my back.

“I don't want to be in love with this person!” I choked out, gripping onto his shoulders as if they were like a life support. “I don't want to hurt anymore, Zack.” I whispered, defeated. Zack nodded, words seeming to fail him.

“Do you know what you need to do? You need to act like nothings hurting when you're around them, and you need to make them see that you're better without them... And possibly make them jealous, okay?” Zack mumbled into my ear. “By the way, I know its Alex you're talking about, but I won't tell anyone.” I pulled out of the hug and smiled at him.

“How did you know?” I gasped, grinning at him. He flashed the sad smile again.

“How did I know? I have to watch the person I want look at someone else the way you look at Alex.” He mumbled, worrying his lip with his teeth.

“Zack, don't worry. I'm sure you'll get her. If she says she doesn't want you, she's lying. Damn it if I wasn't so in love with you know who, and you weren't as straight as a pole I'd be all up in your ass, bro.” I joked, lightening the mood considerably. However it didn't seem to lighten it for him.

”Um.. Yeah, not really a she this time...” He mumbled, not meeting my gaze.
Wait.
Hold the fuck up.
Not. A. She.?
What?

“Zack.. are you sure?” I gasped, the pieces falling into place. Not she. Zack Merrick was either bi or gay.

“Before you go assuming things, Barakat, I'm got gay, and I'm not bi. Its just...” He sighed. “Its just him.” He continued, running a hand through his hair. I really wanted to know who it was, but his tone implied that no further questions would be answered on the subject.
Before it could become an awkward silence, I pulled out my phone, grinning at him wildly.

“SELFIE!” I screamed, dropping a peace sign while Zack pressed his lips to my cheek. I tweeted the picture instantly, captioning it as

'#Merrikat IS REAL! MERRIKAT SHIPPERS JUST DIED'

Within three seconds I already had favourites, re tweets and replies. I didn't respond to any just yet, letting the fans go insane for a while.
I was really glad to have Zack.

Besides Alex, he was my bestfriend, and I honestly don't know what I'd do without him. As for the situation with Alex, I decided to tell him another time, because it would make absolutely no sense to tell him while he's still with Lisa.
Until then, I'll just pretend to not be in love with him.

How hard can it be?

Notes

aAyooooooooooooo

Sorry if this has like no gaps, like paragraph gaps
I'm writing this on my phone so its kinda hard to edit it and stuff


Anywayyyyy omf have any of you fallen asleep in someones arms because its one of the most comfortable places to sleep ever

SOME ONE LET ME SLEEP IN THEIR ARMS TONIGHT PLEASE.

Btw is anyone from london and going to Bring me the horizon in december?
because I am. yo.

-Kelly:))