Me Without You

I stared at my twitter mentions in awe. Some people were really offended by the fact that I was pregnant. The interview had been released about thirty minutes ago and shit was already going down. I leaned against the back of the couch in the hotel room and tried to figure out why people were so bothered. It was one of four reasons. They wanted it to be them, the shipped Lasey, they shipped Masey, or they plain old didn’t like me for some reason. I was being accused of being Jack’s equivalent to Lisa for fucks sake. It was possibly the most insulted I had been in my entire life.
“Holy shit.” I muttered, sliding my phone onto the table. I picked up my glass of Pepsi and took a small sip, staring blankly out of the window. I looked up at the door swung open and gave a small smile to Alex who had let himself in.
“You look tense.” His smile morphed into a look of concern as he leant against the door opposite me. I held my phone up and he sighed, knowing exactly what was wrong. “The interview released already?” I nodded and Alex crossed the small space between us to sit beside me and take one of my hands. The act was meant to be comforting but I couldn’t help but feel guilty, which was entirely irrational. I felt nice to be holding Alex’s hand again, to have some form of physical contact. We hadn’t exactly been the best of friends since he found out about the baby but we were getting there. I didn’t know how I would cope of the twins weren’t Jack’s. I know all of the boys would be there for me, but I didn’t know if I myself could deal with the emotional shit.
“What if they’re yours?” I blurted out, causing Alex to gape at me.
“Excuse me?” He stammered, releasing my hand and retracting his own back into his lap.
“What if the twins are yours?” I whispered. “I don’t know what I’d do Alex. Jack would freak out, the fans would go ape shit. I don’t know what I’d do.” My voice cracked towards the end as my emotions ran out of control, mood swings being one of the only side-effects of pregnancy I had really shown. At the sight of my tears Alex quickly wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me against him, stroking my hair.
“I swear, I would take care of them. I would be just as much of a dad to them as Jack or Mike would be. The fans have no say in how we live our lives and they would get over it.” Alex sighed and placed a kiss on top of my hair. “I love you, Jasey, you know that. If the twins turn out to be mine, I will be there for you as much as I can be, I promise.

“I spoke to Alex today.” I slipped my hand in Jack’s as we made our way through the hotel lobby. Jack raised an eyebrow at me as led me out onto the Scottish streets. “About the twins.” Jack’s face instantly fell and I regretted even bringing the subject up. He nodded slowly as we turned away from the hotel and headed down the high-street. “Jack, we need to figure out what we’re going to do if they aren’t yours.”
“They are.” He stated bluntly before I had finished saying the words. I cringed as his hand tightened around mine.
“There’s a possibility-“
“Stop. We’re not discussing this.” I sighed at Jack’s stubbornness. The topic was touchy for both of us but we needed to get it out of the way.
“Jack, we need to. This is important. We need to know how we’re going to deal with this.”
“If. There’s a fucking big ‘if’ there Jasey.” Jack was scowling now and his pace had increased dramatically. We were winding through the streets of Glasgow and I had absolutely no idea where we were.
“Yes, but we need to- Jack, slow down.” His grip was getting tighter and he pulled me away from the streets and down a cracked path towards a public gardens. “Jack, you’re hurting me.” He came to a halt and slowly released his hold on me.
“I don’t want to talk about this, Jay.” I put my hands on my hips and stared up at my incredibly immature fiancé.
“Alex was a fuck tonne more mature about this situation than you’re being.” I snapped causing Jack to return my glare.
“Alex will say anything to try convince you to run back to him.” There was a tone of sadness in Jack’s cold voice, hinting that a part of him actually believed I would leave him.
“You think I’m going to leave you for Lex? Even if the twins were Alex’s, or Mikes for that matter, I would never leave you.”
“Don’t be so sure.” Jack muttered under his breath and I took a couple of steps backwards.
“What did you say?” I whispered, all traces of anger replaced by hurt. Jack reached out a hand but I dodged it. “You think I’ll leave you for whoever the fucking father is?” I let out a cold laugh. “I thought we were past this? I thought we were getting married? And yet, you still think I’m going to run off with Alex?” Jack nodded solidly and my brain went mad. He thought I was going to leave him? Just run off with whoever co-created my kids? I looked down at my hand and struggled to wrench my ring off, my fingers slightly swollen due to my anger. “Fine!” I screeched, trying to keep the tears at bay. I pulled the diamonds off my finger and pushed them into Jack’s chest. “Fucking keep this until you can decide whether you fucking trust me or not. Because we can’t do anything until you get over your obsession with me leaving you!” I turned and started to walk back towards the town, stopping at the edge of the lawn to yell back at Jack one last time. “You think I’m going to leave you? This is what it fucking looks like. Try asking me to marry you again when you can handle the issues that come with it.” I stormed off back into the Scottish town, the image of Jack’s face etched in my head. Every inch of me wanted to turn back and run to him, run my fingers through his hair and tell him that everything was fine, that I didn’t mean any of it. But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I needed time to think.

Notes

SO LOOK WHAT I CAME UP WITH
I thought a little drama was in order.
Here ya go! x