KAY

"Oh my God! Kayck exists!" Alex squealed as he jumped about the bus like a small dog. I looked over at Jack, sitting on the couch next to me and winked. He reacted precisely as I predicted.

"Was there ever any doubt Kayck existed?" Rian said as he walked up to the front lounge of the bus.

"Well, the cake is a lie." Zack yelled up from the bathroom.

"Well played, Merrick. Well played." I shouted back. I love Portal. Anyway, we were back on the bus after Chicago. Everyone was sweaty and tired and I wanted nothing more than to shower and go to bed. But, we raced to shower and Zack won. I blame Jack. He's slow as fuck and I didn't want to leave him.

"Alex! Calm the fuck down!" Jack yelled. "Your fat ass is shaking the damn bus!" He laughed. Alex finally stopped jumping and plopped down on the other side of me.

"So are you guys gonna go public?" He asked.

"I don't really know." I said, looking to Jack to answer.

"Not sure yet. I kind of want to let them speculate. It's fun!" He grinned and planted a kiss on my shoulder, making Alex squeal.

We sat and talked for a while longer until I heard Zack yell, "Shower's open."

I jumped up and yelled, "I call dibs!"This roused a chorus of annoyed groans from the guys, but I laughed and walked back to the shower.

I shut the door and turned on the shower. I undressed, trying my hardest to avoid the sight of my scars in the small mirror. These days I can't even look at them without freaking out. I grabbed my shower bag and stepped in. I washed, humming "If It Means A Lot To You" from A Day To Remember softly. When I rinsed off, I heard the door open.

"Hello?" I said, really hoping nobody was there.

"It's me." Jack's voice said. Shit.

"Oh. Hi." Don'tlookatmeDon'tlookatmeDon'tlookatme.

"I wanna talk to you when you're done." He said.

"Oh, okay. I'll be out in five." I said. Just leave already!

"Okay." Jack said, shutting the door.

ShitShitShitShit.



JACK

I shut the bathroom door and walked up to the front lounge. Every one of the guys whooped or cat called.

"Mature. Really." I laughed.

"We're just messing with you, man." Vinny smiled. "Congrats though, seriously. She's great." He said.

"Yeah, really pretty, too." Alex said.

"Thanks guys." I grinned. "She is pretty awesome."

"But for the love of God, if you're going to fuck, don't do it in her bunk. I don't wanna be below that!" Zack yelled.

"Don't do it in your's, either!" Alex laughed. I grinned and grabbed a beer. I plopped back on the couch. We sat there and talked until Kay turned the shower off.

"Me next!" I said, running back into the bathroom, not even bothering to knock.

Kay jumped when I walked in. "Jack! What the fuck? Don't you ever knock?" She said. I couldn't help but notice she was only in a towel. I smiled.

"No. I wanted to shower next. Can I go?"

"Um. Sure." She laughed.

"Great." I said, taking off my shirt. Kay turned to face the mirror. With her exposed back to me, I saw every one of her scars. Some just slashes, some words. I yearned to know why they were there. Kay made eye contact with me in the mirror.

"You going to shower?"

"Oh. Yeah. Sorry." I blushed. I undressed and got in the shower. As I was in there, I heard Kay drying off and dressing.

She opened the door, saying "I'll be in my bunk when you want to talk."

"Okay."

I finished my shower and got out. I dried off and got dressed. I looked in the mirror and tried to smile, but it looked forced. I was so scared of asking Kay about her scars, but I knew I had to.


KAY

I exited the bathroom and climbed into my bunk. When I got settled, I plugged in my phone and put my ear buds in. I flipped to my "Chill Songs" play list and selected Mayday Parade's "Miserable At Best". Turning on my lamp, I got out my sketchbook and flipped to my drawing of Jack. It was almost done, I just needed to perfect a few things and shade his hair some more. I drew until I felt a weight shift at the end of my bunk. I looked up to see Jack climbing in. I took out my ear buds and flipped my sketchbook shut and crammed it behind my pillow.

"Hey." He smiled.

"Fancy meeting you here." I said.

"Mind if I come in?"

"Yeah. Get out." I laughed.

"No." He pouted, climbing in. I leaned up and kissed him softly. He kissed back a little rougher, crawling up so that he sat right in front of me. We came apart and I noticed what he was wearing.

"Nice boxers." I chuckled, pointing to his Batman boxers.

"Nice tank top." He retorted, pointing at my Hello Kitty tank.

"Shuddup." I looked down, suddenly aware of how exposed I was in my tank and pajama shorts. You could see several scars criss-crossing my thighs and some on my arms. On my right arm, my bracelets covered most of them, but the ones on my left were completely uncovered because I took off my bracelets to draw. Quickly, I grabbed the throw blanket to try and hide, but I knew he saw. Jack grabbed my hands and pulled them towards him. He looked at my wrists. I could see tears start to form in his eyes. A lump formed in my throat.

"Why? I know I've asked you that about your back. But you made these."

"I've been through a lot. More than I can even begin to tell."

"Please try? Start from the beginning. For me." He looked into my eyes with such care that made me want to curl into his shoulder and cry away my past. I stared at him for what felt like hours, searching for the words to explain why. I opened and closed my mouth a few times, uncertain of how to begin. Tears threatened to spill over.

"I made the first scar the day of my dad's wedding. This one." I pointed to one near the top of my right wrist. "I'm not even sure completely why I did it. It just felt right. Better, somehow. Then I couldn't stop. Whenever my step mom said something too harsh. When I got dumped. When my old friends stopped talking to me because I changed so much. When my stepsister was born. When my brother left. It just seemed right." Tears spilled over now and Jack pulled my hands to his lips and kissed them. He kissed every scar on my arm.

"It's okay. I'm here." He whispered. He pulled me into his lap and stroked my hair. I cried until there were no more tears left.

"I have more." I whispered, taking off my shirt and crawling away so that I faced him again. I looked down at the scars crossing my stomach, not caring that I was only in my bra, but more conscious of the puckered skin. "Sean caused a few of these," I whispered, pointing to a couple of slashes right above my pierced navel. "He made a few, too." I pointed to the various X's that were scattered around.

"I'm so sorry." Jack whispered.

"It's okay. It's not your fault." I whispered so quietly, barely any sound came out.

"What about the words on your back. Those have been bothering me since the day I met you."

"Sean. He thought I was cheating on him with my best friend from school, Andy. Except, Andy's gay. I mean, really, how many straight guys do you know that go to art school?" I smiled.

"Every single one of those words are lies." Jack whispered, looking into my eyes.

"I wish you were right." I whispered, almost silently. I looked down, putting my tank back on. Jack lifted my chin.

"Never say that. Never doubt yourself, Kay. You're perfect. You're beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful. Your eyes, your smile, your hair, everything. Even your scars. Your imperfections make you so wonderful. And I love you." He whispered. His hand stroked my cheek as he closed the gap between our lips. I kissed him back, letting his tongue enter my mouth. A few stray tears leaked from my eyes. Jack kissed them away from my cheeks. I snaked my arms around his neck, holding him close. He laid down next to me and pulled my into his chest, wrapping his arms around me, stroking my hair and humming softly. I recognised the song to be the chorus to Lullabies.

"Jack?" I whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I love you, too," I let myself smile like a fool, because I knew he couldn't see me. I fell asleep to the sound of Jack humming my favorite song.

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I don't own any song or band mentioned in this chapter.

-Sammy

XOXO