No Pads… No Helmets… Just Memories!

'Are you fucking kidding me!?' Was all I thought as I dug my head deeper into the warm surface. Doing the best I could to shield my ears from the blaring Blink song I would have usually adored as it ripped me from my slumber.

'I WON'T TRY,
TO ARGUE...
OR HOLD IT,
AGAINST YOU!'

"MAKE IT STOP!" I moaned as I struggled to roll onto my stomach when I discovered I was blatantly tangled with another slumbering form as it groaned.

'I KNOW THAT,
YOU'RE LEAVING,
YOU MUST HAVE,
YOUR REASONS.'

"HEY!" I jabbed my elbow into what I could only assume to be the second party’s ribs causing them to wince at the sharp pain. "Turn that off, it’s fucking early!" I moaned wiggling my head under what could only be a guy's shoulder as they reached for the phone. Not even bothering to care if I was snuggled up to a mass murderer if it meant I could stay asleep as I listened to the struggle before the song stopped abruptly.

'THE SEASON,
IS CALLI-'

"What Jack?" The person asked bitterly as I settled deeper into the mattress knowing the person I laid with was remotely familiar as they listened to the muffled tone spill from the phone. "Man its fucking early, what?" The voice was soothing and familiar as it polluted the air in its tone practically dripping in sleep.

Reaching up I snaked my arm around the person's chest as I was almost certain at this point of whom he was and tugged him back into the bed. "Yeah. Whatever. Yes, I have her. No. WE WERE SLEEPING!" He argued as his voice slowly woke up, losing the rasp as he spoke. The guy sighing as he listened to the second party I assumed to be Jack before he shifted and wrapped a strong arm around my back. "Let us wake up and we will be right over. Want me to? Yeah. Okay. Okay, we'll call Marc once we eat. Fine. Okay. Bye!" And with that, he hung up.

"Shhhh..." I hushed pulling my body against his, feeling how easy it felt to have the boy hold me only confirming my assumptions as he yawned. "Just go back to bed..." I whispered cuddling up beside him as he ran his fingers through the ends of my hair.

"Will you stop moving..." Alex's gravelly voice grumbled poking my side as I moaned. My nose shifting to burrow into his think neck as his musky scent wrapped my scenes in its familiarity. "We need to get up anyway..."

A small whimper passing my lips as I clung tighter to Alex making him laugh. "Can't we just stay here..." I whined resting my cheek to his bare chest as he laughed again. "Please... I'll do anything! It's too early for Jack!" I begged, kissing his chest for good measure as Alex rubbed my spine.

"As much as I'd love to take you up on that offer!" He yawned hoisting himself up to a sitting position, much against my protests before turning in his place to face me. A small smile on his lips as I rolled to my back and watched him lean forward. "My mom’s home, so you're out of luck..." He whispered before he leaned forward and pressed a soft quick kiss to my lips. The exchange just long enough for my hands to find his shoulders, letting the pads of my fingers trail down his chest as he pulled away, an act I knew in the worst way could very well keep me in bed. But just as he said, luck was not in my favor for he pulled off the bed just seconds later and stumbled to his dresser.

The act reminding me I was most definitely not in a short, tight dress as I pulled back Alex's covers to see my body clothed in one of his older PeeWee hockey tees from when his dad forced him to sign up in elementary school and a pair of his boxers. Glancing up at Alex as he stood in his own boxers, pulling on a plain white tee shirt I smiled and brought the collar of my own to my nose. Taking in his comforting scent, I was oblivious to when Alex retraced his gaze to my lazy figure and simply grinned watching me. "Enjoying yourself?" He chuckled crawling back onto the bed as he spoke.

"Maybe a little more if I knew how I got into these cloths!" I pointed dropping the shirt's collar and glancing up at him.

"Hey! Don't look at me!" He defended, throwing his hands into the air with a laugh, "you dressed yourself!" He told me as I sighed back into the mattress, "but..."

"But what?" I quipped as Alex grabbed my hands and pulled me to a sitting position. The veins in his arms bulging as he hoisted my small body causing my eyes to deepen to a darker shade of gray.

"You had a little trouble getting, out of your dress..." He whispered dragging my arms as he backed up off of the bed. Ignoring my wide eyes as he pulled me from the sheets and sent me a wink whispering, "But I have to ask... Did you wear that thong hoping I'd see it?"

"ALEX!" I gaped as he dropped my arms and darted from the room with a menacing laugh. My face flushing an alarming shade of crimson as I sat back on my feet. 'No fucking way...' I thought eyeing my hips as Alex's powder blue boxers clung to the skin. 'He's lying...' I mentally instated as I physically ignored my thought and reached for the waistband. My eyes darting between the door and my hips as I pulled the boxers back enough to see all I needed to know. "Well fuck me..." I breathed letting the elastic snap back and conceal the black lace as I flopped onto my back. "At least it wasn't Hello Kitty..." I muttered aloud running a hand over my face.

Sure, as addressed before, Alex had seen me in my undergarments more times than I could count - seeing as the boys probably kept a tally to piss Rian off - but it didn't change the fact that Alex and I now played by different rules. No more than a week into our official relationship, and not even twenty-four hours into being public, Alex had seen my most racy underwear that in Heinz sight should not be owned by every seventeen year old girl.

But HEY! When Pink's having a sale, you grab what you can get, because forty dollar bras and ten dollar thongs are a little much, if you ask me!

And the situation only being made worse as I felt the mattress dip. Knees slipping up either side of my body to rest straddling my hips as his hairy legs tickled my thighs. Biting my lip I kept my forearm stretched over my eyes not wanting to see the look in his own golden orbs as he dipped his head and softly kissed the nape of my neck. Losing the fight with my giggle as his fringe tickled the sensitive skin. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable..." He whispered making me laugh as he rested his forehead into the crook, letting the mass of his body to be supported by his knees in avoiding crushing my small frame under his own.

"It's okay..." I told him with a soft laugh as my free hand went to comb through his hair, the action instantly putting the elder boy at ease as he sighed into my neck. "I was the one that flashed you anyway..."

Alex laughing now as he craned his neck to kiss my own, letting his lips linger on the sensitive flesh as he hummed. "It wasn't like I stopped you..." He hushed, shifting his weight to trail soft kisses towards my exposed collar bone where the baggy tee failed to drape. His thumbs rubbing my clothed sides as he used the majority of his hands to hold up his weight. "I just had never seen that one before..." He mumbled making a laugh bubble in my throat as the aura of the situation was shattered.

"I hope you're happy to know I have bought new cloths and underwear since the last time you snuck a peek..." I giggled as he ignored my words and nipped at my other collar bone, shifting to give the other side of my neck attention, "which was when we were twelve may I add!" I smiled running my free hand up his chest to sit on his broad shoulder. Alex's single hand ghosting up my torso as it found my neck. Pulling back, I slid my arm from my face to catch his dark, lustful gaze. His same warm smile pulling at his lips as he brushed the stretched collar off my shoulder before he trailed his calloused fingers over the porcelain skin.

"As long as I'm the only one who has seen it..." He whispered, his raspy tone dripping in dominance though his eyes searched my face with a new look of pure sympathy as if he feared he hit a nerve. Biting my lip I shook my head.


"Only you..." I whispered surprised at my own words as he slowly lowered his head to nip my shoulder. The reminder that he told me he was a virgin circling in my mind as I soaked in the pure sexual frustration a memory of the previous night had stowed upon him as another dawned on me. "Uh... Alex..." I whispered throwing my head back flat as he attached his lips to my shoulder and was surly beginning to suck a bruise. "Uh - isn't - isn't your mom - uh - home?" I sputtered as he pulled from my skin as placed a tender kiss to his mark before running a thumb over the agitated area.

"She's making pancakes... I had to call Marc." He mumbled leaning forward again to kiss the red blob, amazing me at how he wasn't ravaging my skin as expected of any bottled up, sexually driven, teenage boy with his substantially smaller girlfriend pinned beneath him. Pulling away to gaze into my eyes he continued to confuse me while he brushed my falling strands behind my ear. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't mad at me..." He whispered as I locked my hands behind his neck.

"Why would I be mad?" I whispered, my voice not allowing me to speak above the tone as he shrugged and rolled us both onto our sides, our legs dangling off the side of his bed as he pulled me into his arm.

"Because of my comment..." He told me like a young child being scolded for an act as I brushed his bangs from his eyes.

"Well if you must know... I did..." I whispered before biting my lip and watching as he scrunched his brows. His head tilting like a confused pup causing me to giggle, "The tong..." I started biting my lip and watched as Alex actually began to blush, "I definitely had you in mind when I chose it..." I whispered, matching his previously teasing tone with my own as his face drained white.

"Uh- uh-" he blinked watching me laugh as we both began to blush. "Uh well-"

"ALEX, JASEY, BREAKFAST!" Isobel's voice bubbled through the home causing us both to jump apart though she hadn't very well as much as entered the room while we both exchanged awkward looks, sitting up on the side of his bed. Leaving a safe distance between us as the boy began to scratch at the back of his neck.

"Uh, well, we should probably go down..." Alex motioned towards his door as I bit back my lip and nodded, "you know, so she doesn't get suspicious."

"Oh, uh, yeah of course!" I nodded awkwardly running a hand through my hair before pulling myself to my feet. "Can't keep food waiting!" I laughed walking towards the door before Alex grabbed my hand, silently demanding my attention as I glanced up at him. And without a word Alex stepped in front of me and placed a soothing hand to my shoulder. Pulling back the shirt with ease, he let the cool air brush over his red mark before his thumb.

Hooking his free hand under my chin he connected our gaze and let out a shaky breath as he continued to sooth over the budding bruise to be. His eyes slipping from mine to my shoulder with an apologetic glance before he would look back at me and sigh once again. "I don't want anyone to ever leave a mark on you besides me..." He whispered taking a step closer and sliding his hand from my chin to my hip to lock my position in place. His first hand still nursing the mark. "And know that when I do it, it’s out of affection okay, no one should ever lay a hand on you like he did." He whispered resting his forehead to mine. A pure look of guilt masking his features broke my heart as he held me close. Wanting nothing more than to hug him and tell him it was never his fault that Riley did what he did but stayed quiet to let him run through it. Clearing his throat he leaned down to kiss his marking before resting his head into the crook of my neck. "You deserve nothing but love and affection Jasey, even if I can't give it to you..." He whispered breaking my heart as he kissed my skin and pulled away, keeping his eyes on the floor as he did so. "I just want the chance to show you what real love feels like... I don't want you to think I'm going to hurt you like he did..."

"Alex..." I whispered cupping a hand to the back of his neck forcing his bloodshot eyes to mine. His hung-over emotions getting the better of him as he bit his lip, though his heartfelt words had me seeing stars. "You've already showed me what it’s like..." I told him pulling him close. A sigh of blatant relief slipping from him as he bound his arms around my small frame. Hugging me tight as he rocked, I burrowed my nose into his neck giving it a soft kiss, "I know now what it feels like, and I know you aren't Riley and would never hurt me like that, so please, don't worry about me..." I whispered as he nodded his head, "We had a long night, let’s just get some food in you and get to Jack's, okay?"

"Alright..." He sighed pulling back and reaching for my hand to lace his fingers with my own before pulling us into the hall. Letting out my own sigh I let him lead us to through the house just trying to pull myself back together after the emotional moment. But even that couldn't be pinned on Alex.

Just like everyone is a different person after consuming alcohol, more often than not they act differently when hung-over as well. And though Alex usually seemed to sleep off his hangover, it was clear as day that when sleep was not on the table, his emotions hung by a thread. I couldn't very well blame him, but it almost broke my heart to hear him voice his fears. Was it the night old beer-brain talking or was Alex genuinely fearful that I thought he would turn into what Riley had? It almost physically hurt just thinking that Alex may look at me and wonder if I saw him as a goofy brown-eyed singer, or a monster that would turn on me in an instant.

The thought simply mind-boggling. Alex was nothing like Riley. Alex was my knight in shining armor - if you so have it - who saved me from Riley. Fixed me up and showed me that I didn't need to be afraid. Stood by me and fought to prove that I was worth fighting for when I no longer believed it. Alex was what any girl could have asked for, and he still wasn't sure if I saw him that way.

Squeezing his hand as he pulled us through the entryway of the kitchen I shot him a warm smile that told him I had something to say, but that it would wait till a better time as Isobel glanced up from what I assumed to be A Better Home & Gardens magazine. "Well look who it is!" She grinned flicking the flimsy glossed booklet shut as she pushed her glasses to the tip of her nose. "No other than Sleeping Beauty!" She grinned between us, "and her girlfriend!" Mrs. Gaskarth grinned making me laugh as Alex poked his tongue out at his mom gaining an appreciated smack from me. "I hope pancakes are alright Jasey, I know it's been a while since I've cooked for an actual girl!"

"She's not a girl mom..." Alex grumbled dropping my hand to pull the fridge open as his mother and I eyed the boy, "It's Jasey, you forget she’s like a normal person, she's not like Jilian and Helen who just pick at their food..." Alex murmured mentioning his elder half-sisters who I had only had the pleasure of meeting once or twice as his mother rolled her eyes.

"Alexander, that still makes her a girl!" She sighed turning back to the sink as she turned on the water, letting it run over the dirty dishes and pans.

"Not like you think of one..." He pointed pulling out a carton of milk and placing it on the counter as Isobel lofted a brow.

"Well Kara-"

"Don't even mention her name!" Alex pointed at his mother who had begun to wash the dishes before fetching a glass and filling it before turning to me, "want a glass?" He offered sloshing the carton around as I simply shrugged and glared at my shoes not feeling like I was really fit to be listening in on Alex and his mother's dialog as the boy sighed. "Rian can date a girl who picks at her food all he wants," Alex dragged reaching forward and snatching my fingers before yanking me under his arm, "Hell, maybe that’s why they broke up and he's with Cass now, but I like a girl who can stomach as much as me..." He tipped, dipping down to kiss my temple.

"Well I didn't realize it was such a sore subject!" She defended tossing her hands in the air, sending bubbles of dish washing soap across the kitchen making me laugh, "what I think as a girl's appetite should be the least of your worries, you should be thankful I didn't freak out about a girl snuggled up to my half naked son last night like a normal mother would!" She pointed.

"Again mom..." Alex laughed pulling the two of us towards the table as we sat in front of a mountain of pancakes. A headache slowly clamping on my temples reminding me how badly I truly needed food as I grabbed my fork and stabbed the mountain. "It's Jasey... She's slept over how many times before? And besides you’re not a normal mom, that’s why we like you!" He smiled as his mother laughed at her son's antics as he fought me for a few pancakes.

"And I'm just going to ignore the fact that she's in your boxers..." Isobel sang halting my actions as I blushed. "Oh, because she's Jasey!"

"You let her sleep in my room in a bra before..." Alex shrugged making my blush deepen as he shoveled a fork full of eggs into his mouth.

"Well - in your mother's defense!" I coughed as both Gaskarths began to laugh, "I was in a sports bra... And I didn't even have boobs, I was like ten!" I argued as Alex nearly choked on his food. Smiling I watched Alex in his immature ways fight not to make a joke of my physical maturity that I knew was just burning in the back of his throat at I scooped a bit of a pancake into my mouth. Glancing over as his mother passed I nudged Alex, his head snapping towards me as his eyes locked directly onto my chest. Swiftly gaining a smack with a dish towel from his mother.

"OW!" Alex whined nursing his invisible wound making me burst into a fit of laughter. "What was that for?"

"Alex, she may be your girlfriend but she is not an object to drool over!" Isobel scoffed sending me a sweet smile as she sat at the head of the table. "Keep looking at her like that she won’t be your girlfriend for long I'll tell you that much!" She wiggled her fork in Alex's face as we both continued to eat in silence while she loaded her plate. "So what do you two love birds have planned today?"

"We have to go to Jack's!" Alex told her with a mouth full of food gaining a disgusted look from the elder. "He called and woke us up!"

"Okay..." She nodded solemnly as we continued to eat, "it is raining again so please Alex, drive safe, everything's black ice!" She pleaded in a motherly tone as Alex groaned.

"It's just to Jack's house ma!" He exclaimed shoveling another forkful into his mouth before swallowing, "we will be fine!" He reached for his glass, dragging out the last word.

"Alex I mean it, the last thing I need right now is a hospital visit..." She pointed as Alex groaned. "And Jasey hunny, do you need cloths?"

"No..." I shook my head as Alex smiled over at me before placing his fork on the now vacant plate, "I dropped a bag of cloths off at Jack's yesterday, I thought we were staying there..." I explained before shoving my last bite into my mouth and glancing up at Alex.

"You ready?" He questioned as I shrugged and swallowed my food.

"Well are you just going like that?" She questioned as Alex and I both got to our feet and collected our plates. Her motherly concern plastered all over her tone made me smile as I grabbed Alex's dish and tuned towards the sink.

"No mom," Alex sighed and listened to him push both our chairs in as I smiled and placed the plates in the sink. "I have to put on pants and I'm going to grab Jasey a jacket and her shoes so she doesn't freeze..." He explained stepping behind me as I flicked on the faucet and felt him kiss my cheek, "I'll be right down..." He whispered before rubbing my back and sprinting from the room.

Isobel and I sitting in silence for a short moment as I rinsed both Alex and I's plates before pulling the dishwasher open. "I'm really happy you two finally decided to be official..." Isobel spilled as if she'd been eating those exact words all week. Glancing up at her I placed a plate into the dishwasher and furrowed my brows.

"You are?" I asked placing the second dish in before rolling the drawer back in place.

"Of course!" She smiled smacking the table before reaching for her coffee mug with a vast grin, "Don't want to say anything I shouldn't but from the parent gossip, Alex was the big shot for a while, him and Jack both with the band! But no matter who he was acclaimed to be seeing, he never seemed as happy as he is with you!" She smiled as an odd feeling swelled in my chest. It was typical really, our parents had always made jokes of Alex and I, but never once had they sounded as sincere as she did then. "I noticed a change in him that Monday morning! You Jasey Rae, are the only human being to put pep in that boys step so early!"

A smile blossoming on my face just as Alex trotted into the room. A pair of skinny jeans now covering his legs, and his signature red zip-up he'd snatched back from me pulled over his shoulders. Walking across the kitchen he handed me a large sweatshirt while clutching my shoes in his second hand. "Sorry if it's a little big, all my Jasey sized hoodies aren't all that warm..." He said with a sad smile holding it out to me.

"It's fine Lex, thank you." I told him gratefully taking the hoodie and pulling it over my head before he handed off my chucks. Sitting up on an island stool I pulled my knee up to slip on my sneaker.

"Jasey, please make sure he doesn't text and drive I really can't do a ticket right now!" Isobel sighed making her son groan as he turned over the edge of the island and began to tie my shoe whilst I slid on the other.

"I promise Mrs. Gaskarth..." I smiled up at the worried mother before glancing at the son with a warm grin of his own. "I won't let anything happen to your son..."

"Happy now mom..." Alex laughed tapping the plastic toe of my shoe, "You've got my girlfriend babysitting me!"

"Please!" I scoffed hopping off the stool and brushing passed him as I discretely tapped his butt, "I have to babysit you without your mother asking!"

"Oh PA-LEASE!" He broke snatching his keys from the counted as Isobel followed us into the hall.

"It's the truth Lexi-poo!" I laughed reaching up and pinching his cheek before he could tickle my stomach and force me onto the porch.

"BYE MOM!" He hollered letting the door swing shut as he scooped me over his shoulder. Holding me in place by the bend of my knees as I yelped and let him take off across his lawn.

"ALEX!" I shriek loud enough to wake a sleeping bear as he darted for the car. A kitchen window sliding open as Alex - being as gentlemanly as Alex can be - yanked my door open.

"DRIVE SAFE!" His mother called as I was plopped into the passenger side seat while he waved a hand. Sprinting around the driver's side of the car Alex quickly appeared beside me. Letting out a breath he shook out his hair like a dog gaining a grunt from me as I pulled my knees into my chest. Beginning to hum to himself, he fumbled with the keys for a moment before bringing the car's engine to life.

"You ready?" He laughed watching as struggled to tuck my knees into his sweatshirt as he backed out of the driveway. Smiling to myself, practically picturing Isobel biting her nails as I fell into the window with a sigh.

"Not like I have much of a choice." I grumbled letting my eyes flutter shut. The thought of a quick ten minute nap sounding like heaven as Alex's phone went off from the cup holder. Opening a single eye, I watched him eye the device before looking at me with a raised brow. "Wanna check what my mom said?" He laughed as I mumbled a few slurred sounds and shuffled to snatch the phone.

"It’s actually Marc... And from a few minutes ago..." I told him as I flipped the phone open and scanned the screen, "he says he just left a few moments ago and will meet us there..." I read off as Alex nodded and threw me a small smile.

"Actually..." Alex breathed returning his eyes to the road as I thumbed with the phone, "Text him and tell him to just text us now if he wants to turn around and get a ride... Save gas." Alex shrugged and though looking back it didn't seem all too logical, I nodded none the less and sent the text. Snapping the phone shut before returning it to its proper home. "His house is off this street anyway right?" He asked and watched as I nodded and still held the phone in my hand, the two conjoined sat in the cup holder. My eyes watching Alex's fingers drum to the steady rain on the transmission as I took a swallow and dropped the phone. Quickly, I slid my hand up the transmission to tangle my fingers with his before pulling his hand in mine into my lap, using his bicep and elbow as a nifty pillow on the center console.

"It's too early for this..." I muttered scrunching my eyes as I released a yawn.

A soft chuckle coming from the singer as he circled a thumb over mine and let out a breath. "I know babe, you can nap at Jack's..." He soothed making my heart flutter at his still raspy tone.

"Will you join me?" I yawned again, snuggling my head further into his warm arm as I asked. My eyes slipping shut at the comfort of his body heat.

"I'd love too..." He laughed as I nodded my head keeping my eyes shut. "I wish we could have stayed in my bed all day."

"Well Jack will kill me if I start to steal you from him all the time!" I teased with a sleepy tone as Alex soothed my thumb again, the simple action nearly lulling me to sleep on the dot.

"Well Jack needs to lean to share anyway..." Alex laughed bringing a smile to my face as I settled deeper into his arm. Just admiring how comforting it felt even though I was surly making the limb go numb at this point. "Plus..." Alex whispered before I listened to the distinct ding on the directional fill the void of silence for the brief moment before his voice returned saying, "I think he knows I'd prefer you to steal me from him then the other way around..."

"Is that so?" I mused with a smile, probably looking ridiculous with my eyes still shut as he laughed.

"Definitely and - fuck..." He sighed the curse, his odd tone catching my attention as I felt the car pull to a slowed pace.

"What..." I murmured with a yawn, so desperate for a nip of a nap as Alex pulled his hand from mine.

"It's an accident" Alex hushed in the same odd tone as I attempted to pull my head from the console. "But the... Shit!" Alex blew out with a whistle as I felt the car slow to a subtle roll, much slower than the average car passing a broken down driver bringing my hidden unease to the surface.

"What is it?" I yawned sitting up slowly while I rubbed the sleep from my eyes.

And that was it. The moment in my life that would be forever imprinted in my brain. Like a painting just waiting to be released, but to graphic and painful to ever digest. A memory to be suppressed and forgotten for the most. But left to nip at the heels of my brain for the rest of my years.

For years down the roan I'd still get flashes of that day. The shimmer off the shattered glass that riddled the road. The motor oil flooding through the cracks of the frozen pavement as it mingled with the rain and beaded like blood as it dripped. I can still see the glaze in the by stander's eyes, of fear in horror as they watched the scene unfold. The red and white lights bouncing off their tear glossed orbs, still so clear they could be looking into my own and I wouldn't see the change.

The earth shattering hiss of that tan metal door being ripped back as I pressed my palms to the un-shattered glass window. The door being pried away like a wet paper bag. The regret in the car not being my own flooding my head in an instant. I could feel the screech bubble in my throat before it hit the air. My eyes rolling over the mangled metal and molded fender as it hugged the tree. A single "no" of disbelief found its way into my blood curdling plea as I watched.

The men, the heroes of everyday life. The paramedics or EMT's that are a symbol of saving lives, the few men scrambling to ruin my own. Pulling the boy from the car, they pulled the world out from under me in the same swift motion and everything just,

stopped.

I could hear ever beat of my heart, pound and pound against my ear drums till my own frantic clawing was drowned out. Alex's own pleas lost in the mix as I shoved the car's door open, no ever caring to check if it was stopped. And in the end, I might have felt better if it wasn't.

But it was so easy. Just like that.

In a single instant my life was torn to pieces. And looking back now, it’s the most stomach churning thought to accept. Just how easily a life can be ripped away.

All in that instant it was lost.

A life so precious. A friend. A brother maybe. A son. A cousin. A nephew. A boy that would never be an uncle. Never be a father. Never live the life they were meant to be, in an instant.

An instant so quick I could hardly cry out his name as the paramedics pulled him away.

The sight of his limp brown hair never leaving my mind as he clung to the man for his last strand of life. In that moment I still had my friend. But not by my side. My sobs were loud and heart wrenching enough as Alex clung to my body and pleaded for me to stop.

But I clawed and clawed and continued to cry as the paramedics rushed to his side. I watched that day, in the freezing rain as they loaded him up and rushed him away. In the back of that ambulance Marc held onto his life.

As I fell to the road and continued to cry.

All in an instant, it was all taken away.

Notes