Darkness


All I saw was darkness, cold wind running up my body as I looked down to see my exposed legs and chest.


Breathing


The only sound I could hear was the mixture of my breath with another. Two separate heartbeats pounding against my ear drums.


I opened my mouth to call for help but nothing came out.


Glancing down again I saw blood.


Blood pouring from my throat and neck as it ran across my exposed skin. Trickling across the bumpy terrain that was my goose bump riddled flesh.


I reached for my throat but I couldn’t. I was restrained, tied to whatever surface was beyond the blackness.


I tried to cry but only tears came, I tried to scream but nothing came out.


I was alone.


It was just me, the darkness, and the breathing.


The breathing


The breathing that moved around in the blackness but never showed a face, the heartbeat that in itself seemed off and cold.


I looked up one last time and was met with the face of the demon himself. "You don't need to fear me baby girl..." He cooed running a hand up my bare leg as I cried in silence. "There’s no one here to pity you..." He continued letting his hands wander as I sobbed. "And no Alex to save you... So go ahead!" Riley taunted making his way to my neck. "Yell..." He started placing a venomous kiss to my neck, "kick..." Another one a tad higher, "scream..." Another one, "cry..." He continued slowly making his way to my jaw, "scream for Alex for all I care..." He bit on my ear harder than pleasurable causing me to cry out in silence still. "Watching you struggle is all part of the game but only a small part..." He dragged his hand across my chest letting his fingers linger as he spoke, "Hurting Alex is just another, but doing THIS, is just killing two birds with one stone!"


"Stop..." I pushed out past my bleeding throat.


"What’s that..?" He laughed cupping his free hand behind his ear, "I can’t hear you..."


I looked up at him as my tears blurred my vision.


"It kills me you don't enjoy me doing this, because I find it so pleasurable to see you all exposed and vulnerable!" He chuckled beginning to hover over me as he pushed my limp legs apart. "Just watching you squirm, knowing I have some effect on you!" He smirked letting his hands travel to where they so desired causing me to sob out. "Alex can never make you feel this way..."


"Stop..." I gasped with all my force.


"Why...?" He cooed letting his head hover over mine, "don't you find this fun?" He asked nipping at my ear, "Being tied down, letting me have my way with you... It’s just what you’ve been asking for!" He licked at my jaw as I continued to cry, "I usually don't go for sluts like you... But I like it just as filthy as the next guy." Riley grunted grinding his hips against mine as I screamed out in fear, "good girl," he laughed causing me to whimper, "Scream, scream my name..."


-

"JASEY!" My eyes snapped open as I sat up, my eyes darting around the room before they fell on the one who saved me from my own mind games.



"Alex oh my god!" I gasped grabbing at the back of his neck and shirt as I continued to cry and pull him into a hug.



"Jasey what happened...?" He questioned slowly wrapping his arms around me.



I slowly opened my eyes as I looked around the room; I was in his living room, right where he left me earlier into the night. After a surprisingly peaceful night’s sleep in his bed with him the night before I informed him I didn't want to intrude for a third time and insisted I slept on the couch.


Which was now proved to be a bad idea.



"Jasey talk to me..." He hushed rubbing a hand up and down my spine after I remained silent.



"I don't want to sleep alone Alex..." I cried out not realizing every sob was not as imaginary as the rest of the nightmare.



"I didn't want you to..." He hushed pulling me into his lap before standing up while bringing me into a bridal hold. "It wasn’t Riley was it?" He asked as he began to walk, the mere mention of his name giving Alex all the answer he needed as I broke down reliving both the imaginary and the all too real events related with the name. "Hey, hey, its okay Jasey he can’t hurt you!" Alex rubbed reaching his room and rushing inside.



"I’m sorry I’m acting this way!" I cried as Alex placed me on his mattress and turned to close his door.



"Jasey you’ve been through a lot, I’m surprised you’re not worse... I’d be." Alex sighed sitting down beside me at a fair distance as if he were afraid to touch me in anyway.



After a moment passed I crawled to Alex and wrapped my frail arms around his neck and he placed a light hand to my back. "I’m scared too Jasey..." He whispered into my neck as I pulled back enough to meet his gaze sending him a confused look as if to urge him into explaining. He sighed before looking up at his window and doing just that, "The thought that he could come back and I won’t be there to help you scares me, I didn't want him to as much as shake your hand and to think he laid a hand on you in any way just..." He paused to run the hand from my back over his face, "I don't even know it just scares me."



"It’s not your fault this happened Alex..." I dragged running a hand over his jaw.



"Yes it is, I should have been there for you I’m so fucking STUPID!" He yelled getting to his feet.



"Alex calm down..." I sniffled.



"HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT AFTER WHAT I DID TO YOU THIS IS ALL MY FAULT!" He yelled knocking an array of things off his dresser.



"Alex you got me out of there..."



"IT WAS MY FAULT YOU WERE IN THERE!" He yelled back looking me dead in the eye. "IF I HAD NEVER KISSED TAMMY'S SCUMMY ASS YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN BY MY SIDE AND NOT RUNNING FROM ME WITH HIM!"



"ALEX!" I called as his lanky body collapsed to the carpet.



"I’m sorry Jasey..." He sniffled as I held his head in my hands, "I just wanted to protect you..."



"And you are..." I assured pulling his much larger body into my chest as best I could, "you were there for me when I needed you!"



"No Jasey..." He sighed finally looking up at me with swollen red eyes I had not expected to see, "I wasn’t."



"What do you mean?"



"I was off with Tammy when you needed me..." He hushed looking guiltier than I had ever seen him about this whole event.



"Alex..." I sighed, "I’d rather not talk about you and tammy right now... Id actually rather not talk about anything at all..."



"I never slept with her you know..." He blurted out.



"Alex..." I let out a puff sitting upright as I looked around the room, "why are you telling me this, why now, why at all?"



"Because I want you to know I haven't slept with her..." He paused chewing on his lip, "or anyone else..."



I huffed a sigh as I looked around the room not really believing what he was telling me but further more finding it impossibly difficult to pin point why he was telling me it anyway, "Alex again, why are you telling me this?"



"Because Jasey, I want an honest answer" he sighed taking my hand in one of his before looking into my eyes, "did you sleep with anyone in Washington?"



I wanted to laugh and smack his arm as if this were all some playful joke. But I knew he meant business. The pure fear in my eyes at just the mention of his name proved I was afraid of much more than Riley simply just taking advantage of me.



"Jasey..." Alex cooed placing a hand on my thigh where his basketball shorts I had borrowed road up.



"W-What... A uhmm o-of course! Y-Yeah!" I stuttered with a shaky tone as ran a hand through my hair avoiding his piercing eyes.



"Jasey..." He sighed shifting his hand to cup my jaw as I bit back my tears. He already knew the answer. I bit down on my lip as I silently verified what he already knew by shaking my head no. "Is that why you are so scared of him?" He asked in a calm tone and I nodded my head. "Come here..." He sighed taking my hands and helping me get to my feet before pulling me into a tender hug. "Stay with me the rest of the night?" He hushed into my ear as I obliged with a silent nod before we pulled apart.



Hot tears still stained my cheeks as my mind replayed the series of events over the previous two days and I took a seat on the edge of his bed. Alex sighed tugging his hands through his matted bed head before he pulled his shirt over his head leaving him in nothing but his plaid boxers before he made his way over to me.



"Hey..." He called lightly, bending down in front of me as he wiped my tears with his thumbs, "please don't cry Jasey, I’m never going to let him hurt you..." He cooed brushing my hair behind my ear.



"Alex...?"



"Mhmm..." He hummed fluffing my ends of my shoulders.



"Am I... Am I a slut?" I choked out thinking back to my dream.


"No Jasey why would you ever think that..." He sighed taking my hands and standing me up before I was pulled into a hug. "Look at me..." He sighed pulling my head into his hands, "don't let anything he or anyone else said change how you view yourself, because I won’t sit by and let the real you wither away." As he spoke his hands slipped under the hem of my tee shirt to reach the waist band of his shorts that clung to my discolored hips. After stepping out of his shorts I stood there and watched as he made his was to insert a CD I had once burned for Matt before I left and Alex had unknowingly stolen. The disk spinning as the soft sounds of Jimmy Eat World's song Night Drive floated through the room. He returned to stand in front of my before letting his warm hand drift to cup my neck. I let out a breath closing my eyes as I pressed my forehead to his collar bone, my hands coming to rest on his shoulders as he silently slid his free hand down my side. "You’re beautiful Jasey..." He sighed as his fingers ghosted over the prominent bruises on my thigh. "You just need someone to show you just how beautiful you are."






chapter insperation and title credit- She Had The World: Panic! At The Disco

Notes

i wasn't to sure about this whole chapter honestly.. so im interested to hear what you guys have to say about it..

AKA

LEAVE ME COMMENTS AND GIVE ME FEEDBACK :)

-Sarah