"JASEY JASEY WAKE UP!" Rian bellowed bouncing on the end of my bed.

I simply groaned smacking a pillow towards my brother as it hit his chest with a pfft showing now affect.

"JASEY IT’S SNOWING!" He bounced.

"Yeah we only live in Baltimore... It happens!" I quipped trying to burry my head under a mound of pillows to salvage as much sleep as I could muster before it was too late. Rian crawled up beside me and took hold of my shoulder blades before shaking me awake again.

"Don't be a ditz Jase lets have a snow day like we used to!" He squealed bouncing on his knees beside me.

"Ri I have a migraine leave me be!" I tried to shoo the boy but he continued his pestering.

"Then you shouldn't have partied so hard last night, come on lets watch movies in feetie pajamas with hot cocoa!" He bounced pulling on my arm attempting to pull me from the bed.

I swallowed at the thought of last night... The night made to pump me up for me and Rian's big birthday bash as Jack called it but in all the only thing the previous night had done was make me dread the thought even more. "Rian I’d rather stay in bed!" I whined rolling onto my back rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

"Oh no you don't!" He dragged grabbing my arm and pulling me from my bed.

"Rian!" I whined dragging out his name.

"No way in hell are you going to sit and waste away in your bed on a perfectly good snow day!" He laughed standing me up much to my own protest.

"ROBERT!" I called as he threw me over his shoulder and started for the stairs. He ignored my calls and kicks as he made his way down the steps and into the kitchen. "It’s not even a snow day... It’s Sunday!" I whined as he sat me on the the island and turned to fetch the box of hot chocolate packets.

"Who cares it’s our snow day!" He laughed grabbing coffee mugs and pulling then down to the counter top. "Oh and Jack said he wanted to talk to you about something!"

"Like what?" I wondered swinging my legs as I spoke.

"Don't know," he shrugged starting to prepare the beverages. "He’s downstairs with Zack though, just go ask, I’ll be down in a second."

I thought for a moment examining the tiles lining the floor before silently nodding and sliding off the island and starting for the basement stairs. When I reached the bottom my features were greeted with a smile at the sight of Jack and Zack cuddled up beside one another on the pulled out futon couch.

With a light laugh I patted across the matted carpet to the two of them before sitting on the edge of the couch and taking a light hold on Jacks calf.

"Hey bubble butt get up!" I whispered giving him a slight shake causing him to roll over with a groan.

"Jasey?" He mumbled rubbing his eyes as he spoke with a gravelly voice still coated in sleep.

"Yes Jacko!" I giggled crawling up beside him on the couch so he lied between me and a slumbering Zack.

"What’s up buddy!?" He smiled with his eyes still shut causing me to giggle.

"Nothing, Rian said you wanted to talk to me about something?" I question brushing back some of the bed head from his cloudy eyes.

"He did?" He questioned rolling onto his side, throwing an arm over my waist.

"Yes sir!" I giggled running my hand through his matted hair.

"Oh!" He sighed sliding closer to me, nuzzle the side of his face into my stomach. After what felt like a long silence, I decided I needed to speak up again.

"I’m sorry if I ruined last night..." I sighed and as if almost immediately his grip tightened on my side.

"Don't be Jase, Alex is being a prick."

"I know Jack but I-"

"No." He snapped slightly, sitting up, his arms still bound around my waist. "He is being more than an ass to you and you don't deserve that!"

"Jack," I sighed looking down at my lap, "I can’t exactly tell him who he can and can’t be with, if he wants to hook up with Tammy there’s nothing I can do!"

"Jasey..." Jack cooed in a whisper running a thumb over my cheek.

"I just wish it didn't bother me so much."

"It bothers all of us, we know what she did to you and how it affected Rian, I just don't get how I can see that was a bad move and he couldn’t!" Jack explained, "I’m like the king of horrible hook ups by mistake, not him."

"Well that’s where you’re wrong Jacko..."

"What?" He questioned cocking a brow my way.

"Alex and Tammy was no mistake, he knew what he was doing, maybe that’s why it bugs me, that he could just stab me in the back like that!"

"He’s a dick and she’s a bitch Jase, don't let them get to you." Jack sighed puling me close and he nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck as my phone went off.

"What the hell is my phone doing down here?" I asked pulling myself from Jack just enough to snatch the device before sitting back into his side and flipping it open.

"Who is it?" He asked as my eyes ran over the illuminated screen.

"Riley..." I said twisting my mouth as I watched the screen.

"Please don't reply to that!" He begged slowly closing the phone.

"Why not?" I asked with almost too much edge to my tone.

"You know he’s bad news, don't get involved with him because Alex is being a prick, please." He pleaded pulling me closer as he slipped the phone from my hands, "he may be acting like an ass but the normal Alex is still there."

"Sure doesn’t seem like it." I sighed as Jack rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Trust me Jase, the Alex who would do anything for you in a heartbeat is still in there, the one we know and love is still there, deep down, deep deep down."

"I just miss my Alex you know..." I sighed leaning my head on his.

"We all do Jase... I don't know what happened to him."

I looked over at Jack being thankful there was someone who knew what it was like losing Alex as a friend. To just not have him around. Even when he was, all the boys said he wasn’t the same. It was almost like what ever happened that day, caused something inside Alex to break, to alter his bubbly domineer.

And now, everyone was feeling the tug of his absence. I mustered up my most convincing smile at Jack before snaking my arms around his neck in a tight hug.

Shortly after Rian returned down stairs bearing gifts of hot chocolate and marshmallows, the simplest smell bringing the lump named Zack back to life. The four of us sat around that day letting the snow pile around our home watching movie after movie. I couldn't help but note the way Jack held onto me tighter that day, or that even wrapped in his arms I wasn’t put fully at ease, as much as I wanted to be. Maybe it was how he continued to whisper assurances that Alex was still in there somewhere that told me he didn't want me to let go of Alex.

But the more he assured me, the more I though, maybe Alex was gone. Maybe it’d be better if I put myself out of hurting by simply just letting him go. He couldn’t hurt me if I didn't care anymore... Right?

But could I really just walk away without answers as to why he dropped from my life like a fly.

Notes

IM BACK FROM DALLAS KIDDOS :)
GET READY :P

leave me some comments on your thought i know its getting a little draggy and scatter brained but im going to fix that this next chapter i promise sorry.. i didnt mean to drag this out so long.. i guess i got a bit of writers block and this was just me avoiding the fact i didnt know what to do :P

-Sarah