So Long Soldier

I got out of the taxi and dragged my suitcase through the dark towards the house. It was freezing in Baltimore compared to the sunny weather in Australia. I unlocked the door and continued through the house, not even bothering to switch on any lights. I was tired and just wanted to curl up in my bed. It was only for a week or so that I was to be home alone but it was going to feel like forever. I dumped my suitcase in the bedroom and immediately headed for the bathroom, stripping down and standing under the hot water for a solid 10 minutes. After that I put on one of Alex's shirts and slid into bed. For some reason, it didn't feel right sleeping in a double bed by myself. Usually it was Alex and I, or on tour we had single beds or shared a double with someone. I sighed and pulled on more blankets, curling up into a ball, attempting to escape the cold.

-

"Oh for fucks sake!" I swore as my elbow knocked the bag and the coffee beans scattered all over the floor. I groaned and squatted down to clean them up. I glanced at the clock, 3 minutes until my shift was over, yet it was going to take me at least 10 minutes to clean up the mess. I leant back under the counter to get the dust pan and brush but lost my balance and fell on my arse. What a sight, sat on the floor in the middle of a pile of spilt coffee beans.

As if my day couldn't get any worse, I hit my head on the counter getting up, jammed my finger in the fridge door, and it started raining as I walked home from work. I slammed the door, sopping wet, and walked straight to the bathroom for a hot shower. I went to stand under the water but squealed as it was icy cold, retracting my foot and hopping away from the shower. Great, the hot water isn't working. I gritted my teeth and showered anyway.

-

Sitting in bed with my laptop, wearing sweatpants and one of Alex's hoodies, I aimlessly scrolled through Facebook and Tumblr, and looking at all the All Time Low boys' photos on Twitter of their time in Japan. I sighed at the thought of having to spend yet another night alone in a cold bed. I clicked on the Skype icon and signed in, hoping, just hoping, that maybe Alex was online. My stomach twisted when the icon next to his name was actually green. Suddenly my laptop rang at me and an invitation from Alex popped up to accept a video call.

Alex's POV

"Dude you have to tell her soon or she's not going to know what's going on. Seriously."
"But... I don't even know if she feels the same way." I sighed as Jack forced me into yet another conversation on why I should talk to Nebraska.
"There's only one way to find out."
I nodded slowly.
"Has she hooked up with anyone since that night?"
Jack was right, again. "Not that I know of."
"Exactly. Just... Tell her, okay?"
"Yeah alright!" A moment later a message popped up on my laptop screen notifying me that Nebraska was online. I looked over at Jack, knowing that he saw it. He raised his eyebrows and left the room. I took a deep breath and clicked video call. Soon enough, Nebraskas face lit up the screen.
"Hey!" I said.
"Hi," she replied, a small smile showing on her face. I couldn't help but take in her familiar features, her blue eyes, the dimple on one cheek, her long brown hair up in a messy bun.
"Is that my jumper?" I asked.
"Uh... Maybe?" She said quietly.
"You miss me!"
She smiled a little. "Hell no! The house is so clean without you boys!"
I laughed and settled back onto the pillows behind me. "So how are you anyway Nebs?"
"I'm... I'm good!" She said with a weak smile. She wasn't and I could tell. "How are the shows?"
"Yeah they're going great! I have to admit though, I kind of just want to be home."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah... I miss... I miss you," I said quietly, not sure if she heard it or not, slightly regretting saying it.
She looked down, clearly thinking over what I had said. "I miss you too Alex." She looked back up, only to wipe way an invisible tear that the webcam couldn't pick up.
"Nebraska? Are you crying?" She simply nodded and wiped away another tear, the jumper sleeve covering her hand. "What's wrong love?"
"Nothing. I just... I had a shit day. Just lots of little things built up. Don't worry, it's stupid that I'm crying, there's no need. I'm just being stupid..."
My eyebrows furrowed. "Nebs it's fine to cry. It's not stupid."
She bit her lip and looked away. "I'm sorry."
"Hey don't worry, I'll be home soon... And... There's something I need to tell you..."
She looked back at the computer.
"Alex?!" Rian called from outside the door. "We have to go for an interview soon!"
"Yeah, I'll be out in a minute!" I called back hurriedly and turned back to the laptop. Nebraska was still waiting. "Um... I shouldn't be saying this over Skype, I sound like an idiot. And... I know I've been a jerk lately, like I was on Soundwave... But, Nebs..." I swallowed and played with the hem of my shirt. "I... I actually really like you. I love you."
Her mouth fell open a little.
"Alex!" Rian called again.
"Yeah! Coming!" I yelled back.
Nebraska sat still again, thinking. I knew I shouldn't have said it...

Notes