Find a Reason to Feel
6
“This next song goes out to the reason we called this concert, Emma. She’s been missing for 3 years now. I’ll let Jack take it away.” Alex nods at me.
“So she was a huge part of Alex and my life.” I start. “One day she just disappeared and no one knows where. I’ve been trying to track her down and someone said she might be here in Boston. If you know anything about her, please, tell the security guard and he will take you to us. It would really mean a lot. I need my hustlers!” I yell.
The crowd cheers and Alex launches into Remembering Sunday. My heart is a wreck as I strum the chords next to Alex. It’s just the two of us on stage, the light beaming down on us. Zack and Rian are watching from side stage. Somehow, they all made it out here and we have a pretty decent crowd considering it’s a last minute acoustic concert. All of my flyers have been handed out and we are singing the last song of the night.
The club sings along with us softly, and I can feel all of their support. Just when I think my heart can’t take anymore, I feel Rian and Zack put a hand on my shoulder on either side. I fight back my tears as I strum through the last few chords. The crowd erupts into applause and we wave goodbye, exiting the stage.
“That was great guys.” I pull each of them into a hug as we walk backstage. “Thank you.”
“We’re here for you man.” Zack nods. “Rian and I have to get out of here tonight though.”
“I gotta bounce too.” Alex half smiles. “Lisa’s missing me.”
“I understand.” I promise them. “I’m just glad you guys helped me out tonight.”
A security guard taps me on the shoulder. “We got a line of girls out here who have some answers for you.”
“A line?” My jaw drops.
“About 30.” He nods. “Come this way.”
My mind races as I realize one of them might have an answer for me. It slows when I realize that there weren’t hundreds of people at tonight’s show. A lot of these girls could be faking just so they can meet me. I approach the line and sure enough, there are 30 or so fans.
“Hey guys!” I cup my hands over my mouth. “If you know information please stay. If you don’t, please don’t lie to me. Hustlers wouldn’t lie!”
The line begins to thin out and I’m left with only 4 girls.
“Follow me.” I motion for them to follow me.
I lead the group of girls to a tent nearby. We all sit under it and I begin to talk.
“Okay. I really appreciate you guys coming forward to talk to me about this. Emma was really the love of my life. You guys would know her by Mae, since she changed her name. I want to hear everything you guys know about her. Just blurt it out.” I beg them.
“This is the Mae I know.” One of the girls pipes up and shows me a picture on her phone.
The girl in the photo has shoulder length red hair, but isn’t my Emma. I can just tell by the face shape.
“No, that’s not her. But thank you. You were on the right track.” I thank her honestly.
The girl gets up to leave but I stop her. “You can stay if you want. I have something for you all after.”
She grins and sits back down with us. Another girl pipes up.
“The Mae I know works at a library. The one over by Copley Square.” She shrugs.
“Oh the public library!” One of the others pipes in. “Yeah that’s where I know her from too!”
“Do you have any pictures of her?” I plead.
They both shake their head.
“I think that’s the Mae I’m looking for though. Someone said she worked at a bookstore in Brooklyn and loved it. It only makes sense. Do you know when she works?” I ask.
“I went over there last week and she was working in the morning. It was Monday morning because I was trying to finish a paper I hadn’t started.” She laughs.
“Perfect. You guys are amazing hustlers.” I hug each of them. “I’ll round up the guys and you can get pictures with us. You have no idea how much this means to me.”
They all squeal with excitement as I lead them to the guys. They are all sitting around my jeep, waiting for me.
“I think these hustlers deserve some photos.” I announce to them “They gave me some very helpful information.”
The guys get excited and we all take pictures with the girls. We stay back and talk to them for a bit, before announcing that we have to go. The girls leave and I am left to face the guys.
“So they say she works at a library nearby. By Copley Square.” I grin.
“That’s awesome dude.” Alex hugs me tightly. “You’re almost there.”
“I’m going to drive by it tonight to make sure I know where it is and head over first thing in the morning.” I tell them. “You guys were amazing tonight. Honestly, you were everything I could ask for and more. Thanks for flying out here. Especially you Ri, you didn’t even play since it was acoustic. I really appreciate you talking to the fans and handing out flyers.”
“It’s no problem.” Rian hugs me. “I’m just glad that you’re going to get what you need. I don’t know too much about this, but I can tell it means a lot to you.”
“It means more than you’ll ever know.” I sigh.
We say our goodbyes and part ways. I punch in Boston Public Library and Siri tells me where to go. It’s only a few minutes away luckily. As I drive past it, I notice the light is still on inside. I slam on the breaks and park next to the building. I cup my hands against the glass and look inside, hoping to see someone. I hear music playing. My hand reaches for the doorknob and pulls it open.
The door is unlocked.
I walk inside the library slowly, looking around for some sign of life. This place is huge, with books cases as high as the ceiling. It’s midnight. Am I just imagining all of this?
I faintly recognize the music, but no specific name comes to mind. That’s when I hear her. The voice. She’s singing from somewhere inside this building.
“Where it’s all a blur, you are the hardline. In the disorder, you are the peace sign.” Emma’s voice fills my head and I can’t even hear the music anymore.
I fall to my knees and hunch over on the floor as if someone has kicked me. I feel like I’m going to throw up as I scrunch my eyes shut and pull my hands on top of my head. The room spins as I hear her footsteps approach me.
“Sir?” I hear her call. “Are you okay?”
Her hand.
It’s on my back.
Those small fingers.
I can feel each of them burning an imprint onto my back.
I look up at her and she freezes. I freeze.
“Emma.” I whisper.
“So she was a huge part of Alex and my life.” I start. “One day she just disappeared and no one knows where. I’ve been trying to track her down and someone said she might be here in Boston. If you know anything about her, please, tell the security guard and he will take you to us. It would really mean a lot. I need my hustlers!” I yell.
The crowd cheers and Alex launches into Remembering Sunday. My heart is a wreck as I strum the chords next to Alex. It’s just the two of us on stage, the light beaming down on us. Zack and Rian are watching from side stage. Somehow, they all made it out here and we have a pretty decent crowd considering it’s a last minute acoustic concert. All of my flyers have been handed out and we are singing the last song of the night.
The club sings along with us softly, and I can feel all of their support. Just when I think my heart can’t take anymore, I feel Rian and Zack put a hand on my shoulder on either side. I fight back my tears as I strum through the last few chords. The crowd erupts into applause and we wave goodbye, exiting the stage.
“That was great guys.” I pull each of them into a hug as we walk backstage. “Thank you.”
“We’re here for you man.” Zack nods. “Rian and I have to get out of here tonight though.”
“I gotta bounce too.” Alex half smiles. “Lisa’s missing me.”
“I understand.” I promise them. “I’m just glad you guys helped me out tonight.”
A security guard taps me on the shoulder. “We got a line of girls out here who have some answers for you.”
“A line?” My jaw drops.
“About 30.” He nods. “Come this way.”
My mind races as I realize one of them might have an answer for me. It slows when I realize that there weren’t hundreds of people at tonight’s show. A lot of these girls could be faking just so they can meet me. I approach the line and sure enough, there are 30 or so fans.
“Hey guys!” I cup my hands over my mouth. “If you know information please stay. If you don’t, please don’t lie to me. Hustlers wouldn’t lie!”
The line begins to thin out and I’m left with only 4 girls.
“Follow me.” I motion for them to follow me.
I lead the group of girls to a tent nearby. We all sit under it and I begin to talk.
“Okay. I really appreciate you guys coming forward to talk to me about this. Emma was really the love of my life. You guys would know her by Mae, since she changed her name. I want to hear everything you guys know about her. Just blurt it out.” I beg them.
“This is the Mae I know.” One of the girls pipes up and shows me a picture on her phone.
The girl in the photo has shoulder length red hair, but isn’t my Emma. I can just tell by the face shape.
“No, that’s not her. But thank you. You were on the right track.” I thank her honestly.
The girl gets up to leave but I stop her. “You can stay if you want. I have something for you all after.”
She grins and sits back down with us. Another girl pipes up.
“The Mae I know works at a library. The one over by Copley Square.” She shrugs.
“Oh the public library!” One of the others pipes in. “Yeah that’s where I know her from too!”
“Do you have any pictures of her?” I plead.
They both shake their head.
“I think that’s the Mae I’m looking for though. Someone said she worked at a bookstore in Brooklyn and loved it. It only makes sense. Do you know when she works?” I ask.
“I went over there last week and she was working in the morning. It was Monday morning because I was trying to finish a paper I hadn’t started.” She laughs.
“Perfect. You guys are amazing hustlers.” I hug each of them. “I’ll round up the guys and you can get pictures with us. You have no idea how much this means to me.”
They all squeal with excitement as I lead them to the guys. They are all sitting around my jeep, waiting for me.
“I think these hustlers deserve some photos.” I announce to them “They gave me some very helpful information.”
The guys get excited and we all take pictures with the girls. We stay back and talk to them for a bit, before announcing that we have to go. The girls leave and I am left to face the guys.
“So they say she works at a library nearby. By Copley Square.” I grin.
“That’s awesome dude.” Alex hugs me tightly. “You’re almost there.”
“I’m going to drive by it tonight to make sure I know where it is and head over first thing in the morning.” I tell them. “You guys were amazing tonight. Honestly, you were everything I could ask for and more. Thanks for flying out here. Especially you Ri, you didn’t even play since it was acoustic. I really appreciate you talking to the fans and handing out flyers.”
“It’s no problem.” Rian hugs me. “I’m just glad that you’re going to get what you need. I don’t know too much about this, but I can tell it means a lot to you.”
“It means more than you’ll ever know.” I sigh.
We say our goodbyes and part ways. I punch in Boston Public Library and Siri tells me where to go. It’s only a few minutes away luckily. As I drive past it, I notice the light is still on inside. I slam on the breaks and park next to the building. I cup my hands against the glass and look inside, hoping to see someone. I hear music playing. My hand reaches for the doorknob and pulls it open.
The door is unlocked.
I walk inside the library slowly, looking around for some sign of life. This place is huge, with books cases as high as the ceiling. It’s midnight. Am I just imagining all of this?
I faintly recognize the music, but no specific name comes to mind. That’s when I hear her. The voice. She’s singing from somewhere inside this building.
“Where it’s all a blur, you are the hardline. In the disorder, you are the peace sign.” Emma’s voice fills my head and I can’t even hear the music anymore.
I fall to my knees and hunch over on the floor as if someone has kicked me. I feel like I’m going to throw up as I scrunch my eyes shut and pull my hands on top of my head. The room spins as I hear her footsteps approach me.
“Sir?” I hear her call. “Are you okay?”
Her hand.
It’s on my back.
Those small fingers.
I can feel each of them burning an imprint onto my back.
I look up at her and she freezes. I freeze.
“Emma.” I whisper.
ahh update pleaseeeeee
5/3/14