I Won't Let You Choke On Your Misery
Chapter 14
The moon was reflected in the water, highlighting its gentle waves silver. Me and Jack walked along the water swinging our hands between us. We were silent, thoughtful, but it wasn’t awkward.
“Isn’t it horrible to think, if I hadn’t have walked past that night we would have probably never met?” I winced briefly as the memory floods back into my mind; I had been repressing it.
“You know what? I think I would have found you somehow.”
“What makes you think that?” I smiled in the darkness.
“I can’t comprehend never meeting you, it’s just not … it doesn’t feel right.” A warm rush came from my chest, I was glad my blushes were not visible. Why did this night have to end?
Talking about that night reminded me of the question I was so desperate to ask in the hospital.
“Jack, that night. Why were you so drunk?” he was silent for a moment before answering.
“I don’t want to ruin today, it’s been so good.” I didn’t pester him for an answer. I just smiled, stopped and wrapped my arms around his waist tightly hugging him.
“I wish today never had to end.” I said quietly.
Jack sighed, kissing the top of my head.
“Me too.”
“When are you back in the UK?”
“I’m not sure, we don’t plan that far ahead. But probably next year.”
That was a long time. I could keep it together now in Jack’s arms, but I knew as soon as I was left alone I would crumble. I wasn’t sure exactly how Jack felt about me. I didn’t know if he only cared for me because he thought he owed me something. And I certainly didn’t know what was to happen when Jack left. I hadn’t realised I was crying until I felt tears rolling down my cheeks. Jack hugged me tighter for a moment and then loosened his arms, pulling away to look at me. He brushed away my tears with his fingers, caressing my jawline.
“I’ll sort something, okay? It won’t be that long, I promise.”
His sudden closeness took me off guard, I could feel his breath on my face. My heart was going to break through my chest as Jack leaned in closer… and closer.
“JACK? WE’VE GOTTA GO!” Alex’s call echoed down the beach, separating us. Jack cussed under his breath, taking my hand. Time to say goodbye.
“Isn’t it horrible to think, if I hadn’t have walked past that night we would have probably never met?” I winced briefly as the memory floods back into my mind; I had been repressing it.
“You know what? I think I would have found you somehow.”
“What makes you think that?” I smiled in the darkness.
“I can’t comprehend never meeting you, it’s just not … it doesn’t feel right.” A warm rush came from my chest, I was glad my blushes were not visible. Why did this night have to end?
Talking about that night reminded me of the question I was so desperate to ask in the hospital.
“Jack, that night. Why were you so drunk?” he was silent for a moment before answering.
“I don’t want to ruin today, it’s been so good.” I didn’t pester him for an answer. I just smiled, stopped and wrapped my arms around his waist tightly hugging him.
“I wish today never had to end.” I said quietly.
Jack sighed, kissing the top of my head.
“Me too.”
“When are you back in the UK?”
“I’m not sure, we don’t plan that far ahead. But probably next year.”
That was a long time. I could keep it together now in Jack’s arms, but I knew as soon as I was left alone I would crumble. I wasn’t sure exactly how Jack felt about me. I didn’t know if he only cared for me because he thought he owed me something. And I certainly didn’t know what was to happen when Jack left. I hadn’t realised I was crying until I felt tears rolling down my cheeks. Jack hugged me tighter for a moment and then loosened his arms, pulling away to look at me. He brushed away my tears with his fingers, caressing my jawline.
“I’ll sort something, okay? It won’t be that long, I promise.”
His sudden closeness took me off guard, I could feel his breath on my face. My heart was going to break through my chest as Jack leaned in closer… and closer.
“JACK? WE’VE GOTTA GO!” Alex’s call echoed down the beach, separating us. Jack cussed under his breath, taking my hand. Time to say goodbye.
6/6/13