Three Musketeers

Over the next few days I thought about to when I was engaged to Andy and what I used to think during the engagement. How all I thought about was Alex, How much I wanted to be with Alex and instead of enjoying the engagement I became a shell of myself. But now I sit in my bed while Joel gets out the shower and walks into the room with just a towel round his waist and I just look at him. I look down at my finger, looking at the black diamond and then back up to him, all I can is smile. A big cheesy grin because I am so happy. Then I realised something, the look on my face must of changed because Joel noticed.
"Whats up babe?" He asked while getting dressed for the day.
"I never showed you this ring, I showed Alex this ring like 4 5 years ago when I was with Andy. Did Alex show you this?" I was shocked that he remember.
"Yeah Why baby?" He walked over to my side of the bed and kissed me before he went downstairs to make pancakes.
I sat there a little longer just playing with the ring. I haven't thought about Alex in that way since I met Joel to be fair. Yet he still remembers an engagement ring for nearly 5 years ago. An engagement ring that had no history to my family at all, All it was, was a ring that I loved and it would be the ring I wanted to be proposed to. Then I thought that Alex and I saw this ring just before we go together. Yet Andy did not propose with it, so either Alex told him and he did not listen to or Alex knew Andy was not the one for me. He knew if he had told him about the ring and shit fell threw it would of ruin that ring forever for me. I pushed that thought to the back of my mind. I didn't want to dwell to much on that thought too much because if I did that I would then think about why Alex did that and convince myself again that I was in love with Alex. I'm not. I haven't had those kind of thoughts since I've been with Joel. I threw on some PJ pants and one of Joels T shirts and walked downstairs, where he had plated up breakfast. Joel just laughed him. I looked up at him.
"What?" I asked him
"You've got your pancake face on" He giggled and kissed my forehead.
"My pancake face?" I asked really confused
"Yeah everytime you have pancakes, you have the same look on your face. The look is a like a small child on christmas day getting the present the really wanted"
In that moment I was completely in love with that man because he noticed every small thing about me. And in that moment. Alex was not in my mind at all. I was happy I was not fighting an internal battle with myself. I was relaxed. The band was starting recording tomorrow, we were flying up to Pennsylvania to go to this recording studio in the middle of no where. We want to produce to be the best album yet and we figured that was the only way to do that was to lock ourselves away from the world. We taking our favourite producer John Feldmann up there with us. He offered to come with. We had 1 month. 1 month without Joel. 1 month without the world at our heads. I went upstairs to pack then I was gonna go off to meet my dealer. I've had a drug issue for a few issues now. I used to smoke a lot of pot when I was younger like 16/17. I still do with the band but unlike the band I moved on to harder things. When I was like 21 someone offered me coke in a club and there we go. My mates in Asking Alexandria gave me the numbers of good dealers here in the states and in the uk for whenever tour. I wasn't going to pick up I was going to pick up a few numbers of dealers up near where we are gonna be. Joel had no idea what my habit was like. He just knew I was a heavy drinker. So when I'm coked up he just doesn't think anything of it. I was in my own little world packing when Joel came up stairs to me and wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck.
"What time you going out baby?" He asked
"In about 10 why" I spun around so we were facing each other. Joel moved to sit down next to my case, I stood between he legs and kissed my belly through my shirt which happened to be a GC t shirt. "Oi whats wrong" I lift his chin up and looked him in the eyes. I knew there was something wrong with him
"I'm gonna miss you" He looked so sad "I don't want you to go. I don't want to spend a month with out you"
I moved back and knelt down so we were level. "Baby baby baby, look at me. You silly sausage, you go on tour in a few days anywhere so time is gonna fly by ok? Its a tiny amount of time. I love you" I gave him a kiss and got up. I grab my bag and walk out the door. I was meeting hashtag by the local walmart. It was about a 20 minute drive from our home, I grabbed the numbers and did a little shop for Joel so when on tour he doesn't live off burgers and burritos. When I got home, I placed the food in the garage fridge and walked upstairs to where I thought Joel would be shouting his name out. When I got upstairs next to my suitcase was an Agent Provocateur bag, A big bag actually. On top was a card.
To My Jasey Rae
I'm gonna miss you so much when you leave tomorrow so tonight I have the most amazing night planned ever. So wear this and I'll pick you up at 7
JMDDN x
I opened up the bag to find flesh coloured stockings with the black seam down the back. A simple black lace thong with a lace suspender belt, a matching bralet. Then next to it a black bardot neck line, tight fitting dress. After I unfolded the dress, in the middle was another note. All it said was under the bed. Naturally I thought he was hiding there. So I looked under the grand King size and I saw it. The Christian Louboutin box. I pulled it towards me. I couldn't even scream with happiness I was so shocked. but the boxes kept coming. Three more boxes after followed. I just lined the boxes up and on the last one, there was a note one it. I know you don't like odd numbers ;)
I lifted all 4 lids off the boxes. and pulled one shoe out of their dustier bag. Then I placed the lids back on. I then I placed the shoe on each box. I stared in great love. There were shoes I ever wanted from Louboutin. All In Black, All Sky High
Marlenalta Veau Velours
Victoria Patent
Bianca Botta King Calf
Next was the real special ones. I said I wanted these for ages but Louboutin didn't do them. He had them custom made and it just made my heart melt that he had thought so much about me. It was a pair of Victoria Patent with covered all over in spikes. This boy is my world. This boy is everything to me. I sat there looking at the boxes. I then out of the corner of my eye. I saw a post it note Hanging off the walk in wardrobe You think I'd let you go out without a new bag did you? ;)
I opened the double doors. To see there was a chanel box on the island in the middle of the room. I opened it up to see a Large Classic Flap Bag. I've wanted this bag for so long.

A couple hours passed. I had just sat on my bed and went through pictures of the past. Alex and I, The boys just everything and cried with happiness. He is my everything. Heis my world. I realised that I only had a couple hours to get ready. I made a real effort. So I looked bomb af. I used my new bag and the custom pair of Victorias. I had him walk in the front door, So I walk do the stairs. He stood there like a little boy on christmas Smile from ear to ear. I found him. My angel. My Joel.

Notes