Mistakes
So close to closure.
*3 YEARS LATER*
I stood at the bottom of our stairs, we were late getting to the airport. We were currently heading on tour, Warped Tour in the U.S. We were both ecstatic to be on tour again. It had only been a couple months and we already missed it. "Oli! Get your skinny ass down here before I come up there and get it!" I yelled from the bottom of the steps. "Alright woman! Don't get your nickers in a bunch!" He yelled coming down the steps.
He jumped off the last step and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm so glad to be back on tour." He said against my shoulder. "Me too. We have to leave now grab your shit so we can get out. The cabs here." I said and pulled out of his grip. I grabbed my suit case and carry on. He grabbed his and we walked out to the cab.
I locked up the house and ran out to the cab. Yes, I said house, we moved into a little house. It was gorgeous, just perfect. I crawled into the cab on the left side. I was looking out the window getting one last look at what has been my home for three years, sure we had been on tours but none in the U.S. the last three years.
I was thinking about whether they would be there? Would they recognize me? Would they care? I didn't know what I would do if I saw them. I was different now, my hair was longer, and had undertones of a blue and pink. It was still long though, I loved it. I had more tattoos now, the biggest being the sleeve on my left arm that run up my arm and across my shoulder blades.
I got the sleeve to cover up what I had done to my arm but much to my dismay the scars showed through. I now had the bar across the top of my ear, and another set of ear hole in my ear making the total 5. I was now a lot skinnier, I still struggled with an eating disorder that popped it's brutal head in my life again.
I was interrupted in my thinking by Oli laying his head across my lap. I couldn't help but smiled, I ran my fingers through his hair. We made it to the air port with about 10 till boarding. Oli and I ran through checked our bags and such and ran to meet up with the others just as our flight was being called.
We got onto the plane and Oli and I sat together, sharing music, laughs and shoulders with each other on the long trip ahead of us. I had taken Dramamine, is so I wouldn't throw up, I got motion sickness. I leaned against Oli shoulder for the duration of the ride.
I felt some one poking my face. "Stop that. Your fingers are too boney!" I said. He gasped and I smiled. "You enjoy my boney fingers!" He retorted back. I opened my eyes. "You know it." I said smiling way too big. He pulled me up with him and I grabbed my bag and we left the air plane. We got our bags and made our way to the parking lot.
We walked out and I smelled the air. "Whatchdoin?" Matt N. asked. "I'm smelling the McDonalds and pollution in the air..." I breathed in really deep. "Yep...America." They laughed at me. "Come on." Oli said pulling me out to the bus by my hand. I got on and dropped my suit case off in the back lounge. I walked back out and sat on Oli's lap. "Seriously?! Why are you two not dating?! She's not gonna wait forever man." Lee said.
I turned to Oli. His hands shot up in a defensive position. "I've tried guys, she wont." "Why not, Paige?" Matt N. asked. "I've hurt people before and I wont let another person I care about get hurt." I said. It sounded legit in my head. "Well you guys live with each other, you say I love you and you fuck. If that doesn't say 'Significant Other' than I don't know what does." He finished leaning back. I just smiled still agreeing with my answer.
Oli leaned forward a little and cupped my boobs in his hands. "I get to do this so it must not be all that bad." I rolled my eyes and stood up. "How much longer till were there?" I asked. "We're not that far from the first location so about 10 minutes left." Matt K. Said. I nodded and decided it was time to get dressed for the day.
I had had my Pj's on all day, No body wants to fly in real clothes. I opened my suit case going threw what I could wear. I pulled out everything that I owned that was American. It happened to be a bandeau, and socks that had the pattern on them. Then I pulled out some shorts and grabbed the stuff I would need to change piercings.
I slipped off my shirt and bra. I felt two arms snaked their way around my waist. "Right now?" I questioned in a joking tone, while he nibbled at the skin on my neck. "we could if you wanted..." He said while he nibbled on my ear lobe. "It's not like I don't want to, It's just I have to set up the booth-" "The booth can wait." He said while nibbling at my collar bone while his left hand slid up my stomach and cupped my left boob.
"When's your show?" I asked. I knew the answer. "I don't know." He breathed on my neck. "Exactly." I said turning and removing his hand from it's position teasing my nipple. "It's at 12:30." He let out a loud sigh. "Fine! I'll help you set up so maybe we could get finished...early." He said while wiggling his eye brows. "Maybe." I said while I pulled down my shorts, stepping out of them.
"You went commando?" He asked. "Yeah, I was too lazy after last night." I said smiling at him while I pulled up some under wear along with a pair of shorts. I pulled the bandeau over my head and had it in place. I put in my earrings, belly ring and new tongue ring. Oli just watched. I slipped on my socks and shoes.
"Whatcha think?" I asked. "Very... Americanized." He said. I laughed. "Yeah, cause it's the bomb!" I said sticking out my tongue and holding rock symbols in the air. "Alright woman, the bus stopped we can go set up now." He said and turned around. I jumped on his back, and he carried me off the bus. I had never seen so many bands in one place, I had never gone to Warped Tour before.
I walked over to our booth, helping put the tent part up. "I'll organize if you bring all the shit to me." I said talking to all the boys. "Alright, but don't get bossy lady." Matt N. said. "You don't tell me!" I replied back. "Yes, mam." He said and grabbed a box. I laughed and started to fold the shirts and other things we were selling at the booth.
It was taking so much longer than expected due to all the people stopping by a talking to me. Don't get me wrong I like attention but at the same time let me do my damn job, thank you. Of coarse I didn't say that, I'm too nice. And really so were they. I met a lot of cool people. Such as Austin Carlile came by with Alan Ashby, Justin Hills, Jack Fowler. I met Tony Perry, and Mike Fuentes.
Who by the wall is a tall man. I'm tall for a girl though so, 5'11". I was currently talking to Josh Franceschi from You me at six. "How did you end up with Oli?" He asked. Everyone has asked me this today. "Oh I'm not with Oli." I said and kept folding shirts. "Oh alright. I have to go but I'll talk to you later." He said giving me a hug. That's like the hundredth hug I've gotten today. Good thing it's before the park opens or else they would have already preformed and would be all sweaty.
I walked back to the trailer to grab something when I lifted the next box, it fell apart. "Cunt Muffins!" I yelled. I picked up the clothes and draped them over my body, arms and face. I walked around the corner using the little eye sight I actually had. "What are you doing woman?!" I heard Oli yell around the corner. "The box broke! Wanna help me?!" I yelled back. I felt Oli pull them off my arms.
I walked over to the table putting down the stack I had on my head. I looked over at Oli. That's when I saw him. My head sent signals to my heart that felt like semis running over a paper cup. He was smiling talking to Oli. "And of coarse you know Paige, She used to work for you guys." Oli said pointing to me. He looked over and his eye scanned my body. He smiled but it faded, then he ran and engulfed me in a hug.
"Zack, I'm so sorry." I said trying to hold my tears. "I just. I'm so glad to see you." He said to me. I continued to hug him. Oli must have understood we needed a minute and left. Zack and I pulled apart. "You look so different." He said. I just stared at the floor afraid if I looked up he might disappear as if he was a dream. "You gotta tell me what happened. Like where you went and how you met Oli and how your on this tour. I just I'm so glad to have you back."
He said again pulling my body back into his. The way Zack smells I associate with home, he smells delightful and he is the only person who offered to take me in. "I left to England." I said. He pulled away. We sat in two near by chairs. He motioned me to go on. "I decided it was better off if I never came back, People had already died because of me and I cause two broken hearts... I didn't wanna make it worse."
He took my hand. "You broke them, they slowly got better but they still love you... you know that though didn't you?" I nodded. "And that's why you've stayed gone." He said. I nodded again letting a few tears roll down my cheek. "Hey. don't cry." "I stayed gone for this exact reason. I can't leave now, your my brother and I love you. I miss you...them. Everyone." "Well then don't." I looked up at him.
"What would I do with out you?" I asked. "Probably...die." He said. We both laughed and I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Your amazing." I said into his ear. "Please don't ever leave me again." "I promise." I said shaking my head yes. "How did you meet Oli?" He asked. "I met him the day I went to England... He took me in and became like my best friend." "Are you guys like dating?" He asked.
I ran my hand through my hair and shuffling in my seat. "No." I looked at him. "Everyones asked me that. He has asked me out before, but I refuse to hurt anyone else Zack. It almost killed me when I left, Oli helped me get through most of it." I said. "Like what, cause Alex and Jack struggled too, Paige." "I got deep into drugs and started my habit back up...actually both of them." "Really? We fought so hard for those to stay gone-" "I know I just. I didn't know what else to do."
I wiped my eyes. "That started about 2 and a half years ago. I struggled with it for a while then Oli pulled me out. I've been cut free for a little over a year and a half. And I don't do any drugs anymore." "That's amazing." He said. "I know." I said. "So other than that whats new?" He asked. "I got some tattoos and piercings, I've worked with bring me for the last three years, I still live with Oli-" "Are you guys like... you know?" "I mean occasionally. He has had a girl friend or two since we met but me nope. Oli was always there though..."
"Ok." "Whats new with you?" I asked. "Well nothing really, I'm just boring old me." "Your not boring Zack Merrick. If anything I would use the word awesome or amazing!" I said doing an hand gesture. He laughed. "I really did miss you." He said. I turned to him and bumped him with my elbow. "Me too. You are my brother and I LUV YOU!" I said and kissed him cheek.
We stood up and he left I finished my booth just in time for the doors to warped officially opened. I was planing on seeing my guys preform, I always did. Their show was at 12:30. But I was gonna go see All Time Low preform at 2:30... And telling the truth. I missed them and probably would have been really upset if they weren't here. It was time we all needed closure if nothing else.
I stood at the bottom of our stairs, we were late getting to the airport. We were currently heading on tour, Warped Tour in the U.S. We were both ecstatic to be on tour again. It had only been a couple months and we already missed it. "Oli! Get your skinny ass down here before I come up there and get it!" I yelled from the bottom of the steps. "Alright woman! Don't get your nickers in a bunch!" He yelled coming down the steps.
He jumped off the last step and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm so glad to be back on tour." He said against my shoulder. "Me too. We have to leave now grab your shit so we can get out. The cabs here." I said and pulled out of his grip. I grabbed my suit case and carry on. He grabbed his and we walked out to the cab.
I locked up the house and ran out to the cab. Yes, I said house, we moved into a little house. It was gorgeous, just perfect. I crawled into the cab on the left side. I was looking out the window getting one last look at what has been my home for three years, sure we had been on tours but none in the U.S. the last three years.
I was thinking about whether they would be there? Would they recognize me? Would they care? I didn't know what I would do if I saw them. I was different now, my hair was longer, and had undertones of a blue and pink. It was still long though, I loved it. I had more tattoos now, the biggest being the sleeve on my left arm that run up my arm and across my shoulder blades.
I got the sleeve to cover up what I had done to my arm but much to my dismay the scars showed through. I now had the bar across the top of my ear, and another set of ear hole in my ear making the total 5. I was now a lot skinnier, I still struggled with an eating disorder that popped it's brutal head in my life again.
I was interrupted in my thinking by Oli laying his head across my lap. I couldn't help but smiled, I ran my fingers through his hair. We made it to the air port with about 10 till boarding. Oli and I ran through checked our bags and such and ran to meet up with the others just as our flight was being called.
We got onto the plane and Oli and I sat together, sharing music, laughs and shoulders with each other on the long trip ahead of us. I had taken Dramamine, is so I wouldn't throw up, I got motion sickness. I leaned against Oli shoulder for the duration of the ride.
I felt some one poking my face. "Stop that. Your fingers are too boney!" I said. He gasped and I smiled. "You enjoy my boney fingers!" He retorted back. I opened my eyes. "You know it." I said smiling way too big. He pulled me up with him and I grabbed my bag and we left the air plane. We got our bags and made our way to the parking lot.
We walked out and I smelled the air. "Whatchdoin?" Matt N. asked. "I'm smelling the McDonalds and pollution in the air..." I breathed in really deep. "Yep...America." They laughed at me. "Come on." Oli said pulling me out to the bus by my hand. I got on and dropped my suit case off in the back lounge. I walked back out and sat on Oli's lap. "Seriously?! Why are you two not dating?! She's not gonna wait forever man." Lee said.
I turned to Oli. His hands shot up in a defensive position. "I've tried guys, she wont." "Why not, Paige?" Matt N. asked. "I've hurt people before and I wont let another person I care about get hurt." I said. It sounded legit in my head. "Well you guys live with each other, you say I love you and you fuck. If that doesn't say 'Significant Other' than I don't know what does." He finished leaning back. I just smiled still agreeing with my answer.
Oli leaned forward a little and cupped my boobs in his hands. "I get to do this so it must not be all that bad." I rolled my eyes and stood up. "How much longer till were there?" I asked. "We're not that far from the first location so about 10 minutes left." Matt K. Said. I nodded and decided it was time to get dressed for the day.
I had had my Pj's on all day, No body wants to fly in real clothes. I opened my suit case going threw what I could wear. I pulled out everything that I owned that was American. It happened to be a bandeau, and socks that had the pattern on them. Then I pulled out some shorts and grabbed the stuff I would need to change piercings.
I slipped off my shirt and bra. I felt two arms snaked their way around my waist. "Right now?" I questioned in a joking tone, while he nibbled at the skin on my neck. "we could if you wanted..." He said while he nibbled on my ear lobe. "It's not like I don't want to, It's just I have to set up the booth-" "The booth can wait." He said while nibbling at my collar bone while his left hand slid up my stomach and cupped my left boob.
"When's your show?" I asked. I knew the answer. "I don't know." He breathed on my neck. "Exactly." I said turning and removing his hand from it's position teasing my nipple. "It's at 12:30." He let out a loud sigh. "Fine! I'll help you set up so maybe we could get finished...early." He said while wiggling his eye brows. "Maybe." I said while I pulled down my shorts, stepping out of them.
"You went commando?" He asked. "Yeah, I was too lazy after last night." I said smiling at him while I pulled up some under wear along with a pair of shorts. I pulled the bandeau over my head and had it in place. I put in my earrings, belly ring and new tongue ring. Oli just watched. I slipped on my socks and shoes.
"Whatcha think?" I asked. "Very... Americanized." He said. I laughed. "Yeah, cause it's the bomb!" I said sticking out my tongue and holding rock symbols in the air. "Alright woman, the bus stopped we can go set up now." He said and turned around. I jumped on his back, and he carried me off the bus. I had never seen so many bands in one place, I had never gone to Warped Tour before.
I walked over to our booth, helping put the tent part up. "I'll organize if you bring all the shit to me." I said talking to all the boys. "Alright, but don't get bossy lady." Matt N. said. "You don't tell me!" I replied back. "Yes, mam." He said and grabbed a box. I laughed and started to fold the shirts and other things we were selling at the booth.
It was taking so much longer than expected due to all the people stopping by a talking to me. Don't get me wrong I like attention but at the same time let me do my damn job, thank you. Of coarse I didn't say that, I'm too nice. And really so were they. I met a lot of cool people. Such as Austin Carlile came by with Alan Ashby, Justin Hills, Jack Fowler. I met Tony Perry, and Mike Fuentes.
Who by the wall is a tall man. I'm tall for a girl though so, 5'11". I was currently talking to Josh Franceschi from You me at six. "How did you end up with Oli?" He asked. Everyone has asked me this today. "Oh I'm not with Oli." I said and kept folding shirts. "Oh alright. I have to go but I'll talk to you later." He said giving me a hug. That's like the hundredth hug I've gotten today. Good thing it's before the park opens or else they would have already preformed and would be all sweaty.
I walked back to the trailer to grab something when I lifted the next box, it fell apart. "Cunt Muffins!" I yelled. I picked up the clothes and draped them over my body, arms and face. I walked around the corner using the little eye sight I actually had. "What are you doing woman?!" I heard Oli yell around the corner. "The box broke! Wanna help me?!" I yelled back. I felt Oli pull them off my arms.
I walked over to the table putting down the stack I had on my head. I looked over at Oli. That's when I saw him. My head sent signals to my heart that felt like semis running over a paper cup. He was smiling talking to Oli. "And of coarse you know Paige, She used to work for you guys." Oli said pointing to me. He looked over and his eye scanned my body. He smiled but it faded, then he ran and engulfed me in a hug.
"Zack, I'm so sorry." I said trying to hold my tears. "I just. I'm so glad to see you." He said to me. I continued to hug him. Oli must have understood we needed a minute and left. Zack and I pulled apart. "You look so different." He said. I just stared at the floor afraid if I looked up he might disappear as if he was a dream. "You gotta tell me what happened. Like where you went and how you met Oli and how your on this tour. I just I'm so glad to have you back."
He said again pulling my body back into his. The way Zack smells I associate with home, he smells delightful and he is the only person who offered to take me in. "I left to England." I said. He pulled away. We sat in two near by chairs. He motioned me to go on. "I decided it was better off if I never came back, People had already died because of me and I cause two broken hearts... I didn't wanna make it worse."
He took my hand. "You broke them, they slowly got better but they still love you... you know that though didn't you?" I nodded. "And that's why you've stayed gone." He said. I nodded again letting a few tears roll down my cheek. "Hey. don't cry." "I stayed gone for this exact reason. I can't leave now, your my brother and I love you. I miss you...them. Everyone." "Well then don't." I looked up at him.
"What would I do with out you?" I asked. "Probably...die." He said. We both laughed and I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Your amazing." I said into his ear. "Please don't ever leave me again." "I promise." I said shaking my head yes. "How did you meet Oli?" He asked. "I met him the day I went to England... He took me in and became like my best friend." "Are you guys like dating?" He asked.
I ran my hand through my hair and shuffling in my seat. "No." I looked at him. "Everyones asked me that. He has asked me out before, but I refuse to hurt anyone else Zack. It almost killed me when I left, Oli helped me get through most of it." I said. "Like what, cause Alex and Jack struggled too, Paige." "I got deep into drugs and started my habit back up...actually both of them." "Really? We fought so hard for those to stay gone-" "I know I just. I didn't know what else to do."
I wiped my eyes. "That started about 2 and a half years ago. I struggled with it for a while then Oli pulled me out. I've been cut free for a little over a year and a half. And I don't do any drugs anymore." "That's amazing." He said. "I know." I said. "So other than that whats new?" He asked. "I got some tattoos and piercings, I've worked with bring me for the last three years, I still live with Oli-" "Are you guys like... you know?" "I mean occasionally. He has had a girl friend or two since we met but me nope. Oli was always there though..."
"Ok." "Whats new with you?" I asked. "Well nothing really, I'm just boring old me." "Your not boring Zack Merrick. If anything I would use the word awesome or amazing!" I said doing an hand gesture. He laughed. "I really did miss you." He said. I turned to him and bumped him with my elbow. "Me too. You are my brother and I LUV YOU!" I said and kissed him cheek.
We stood up and he left I finished my booth just in time for the doors to warped officially opened. I was planing on seeing my guys preform, I always did. Their show was at 12:30. But I was gonna go see All Time Low preform at 2:30... And telling the truth. I missed them and probably would have been really upset if they weren't here. It was time we all needed closure if nothing else.
Notes
Comment Please!!!!! I really want to know what you think I tried really hard to make this enjoyable but I don't know...Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=98786165
* Her hair is in there too, But in the story it's long just like the original pic of her.
11/4/13