Destroy Rebuild

“So what’s been up with you?” Megan asked. “You’ve been a little off lately.”

I glanced back at her briefly as I pulled the macaroni and cheese out of the oven. It was Thanksgiving, and we were hosting a little “Friendsgiving” at our house. Megan, Luke, Jack, his date Emma, Zack and Erin had already arrived, with Rian and Cassadee on their way over. Megan gently ran her hand over the back of Will’s head to smooth down some stray hairs while Erin was working on opening the wine bottles. The guys were in the back yard, hovering over a deep fryer as the turkey cooked.

Truth be told, I was a little off. I still hadn’t given Alex a definite answer about the house in California yet, but it crossed my mind every day. The house was so perfect in every way. It was everything I dreamed of living in some day. But I still couldn’t shake the doubt that crept into my heart every time I almost agreed to it. It had always been a mere fantasy, but with the possibility of it being real, I started having second thoughts.

As far as I knew, no one else was aware that Alex was considering buying a house for us in California. I hadn’t told anyone, and he mentioned before that he didn’t want to ruffle any feathers until we were positive we were going to go for it. I wasn’t particularly worried about how far away it was until I thought about both mine and Alex’s parents not being as close as they were at that point. Being on the opposite side of the country from my parents almost made me decline immediately and erase all memory of the house from my mind. Then there was Megan, and I wasn’t sure how I would survive without seeing her.

I shook the oven mitts off my hands and pushed the sleeves of my flannel up. “Nothing really,” I lied.

Megan stared at me with a blank expression. “Whitney, we’ve been best friends for nearly fifteen years. I know you like the back of my hand. You’re lying to me.”

I nodded slowly and glanced at Erin before my eyes traveled to the backyard and landed on Alex. He was laughing as he brought his beer bottle up to his lips and when our eyes connected, he smiled the sweetest smile ever. I blushed and smiled back before adverting my attention back to Megan, who was still staring at me expectantly. Even Erin stopped what she was doing to listen.

“On our last day in California, Alex took us back to Venice Beach and we met with a realtor about buying a house,” I said slowly.

Their reactions were the same, both of them gasping and their mouths hanging open.

“Buy-buying a house?” Megan stuttered. “In Venice Beach?”

I nodded.

“In California,” she said flatly. “You’re buying a house in California.”

“Not yet,” I shook my head. “Alex is waiting for me to decide if I want him to do it.”

“Do you not like the house?” Erin spoke up.

The olive green two storied bungalow popped back into my head, sending a chill down my spine.

“I love it so much,” I groaned.

“What does it look like?” Megan asked.

I moved quickly to the living room and retrieved Alex’s laptop, opening it and pulling the house up on the real estate website. I clicked through the pictures, describing each one and what we would use it for. They fell in love with it, too, and by the last photo of the backyard with the view of the ocean, I was desperately wishing I could go back.

“Hey Whit?” Jack said as he reentered the kitchen.

I looked up at him from the laptop, closing it slightly.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?”

I nodded and followed him into the living room while he glanced nervously towards the back yard.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“It’s Emma,” he sighed. “She’s really shy. She was nervous about coming because she hasn’t met any of you yet. I keep catching her glance in the kitchen at you and Megan and Erin, and I know she’s tired of listening us go on and on about guy stuff.”

I nodded, a pang of guilt hitting my gut. My mind was so preoccupied that I’d completely forgotten Emma was even there.

“Listen, do you think maybe you can take her under your wing and try to talk to her? Get her to open up? I’m really digging her and I want her to be comfortable hanging out with my friends.”

“Yes,” I nodded. “Absolutely. And I’m sorry we haven’t made an effort to include her yet. My mind is,” I paused, waving my hand around aimlessly. “In another state.”

“Thanks Whit,” he smiled, and I turned to go invite Emma to join us when he grabbed me by my arm.

“One more thing,” he chuckled.

I nodded and leaned against the arm of the couch.

“I’m really glad you came into Alex’s life. I haven’t seen him this happy in a really long time. He’s had his fair share of girls act interested in him just to get into his pockets. And I’m not going to lie, I thought that was what you were up to when I first found out about him getting you pregnant.”

I smiled at his confession.

“But I do apologize, because I can clearly see that you’re in this for him. I can tell that you really do love him, and for that I’ll be forever grateful. You two are perfect for each other. And, you make some pretty cute kids, too,” he laughed.

I giggled and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight hug.

“I give you my word, Jack Barakat. The only thing I’m after in this relationship is a lifetime of happiness with your best friend. I couldn’t ask for anything else.”

“Word,” he smiled. “Let’s get this dinner ready. I’m fucking starving.”

I followed Jack to the backyard and stood next to Alex. His arm snaked around my shoulder and I slid my hand into his back pocket as he kissed the side of my head. I saw Emma visibly perk up once she spotted another female outside and I smiled at her.

“How’s it coming?” I asked Alex.

“Pretty well,” he nodded, smiling down at me. “We have about another hour before it’s done.”

“Perfect,” I smiled back before looking at Emma. “Do you want to come hang out with us? We have wine!”

“Sure,” she giggled nervously, brushing a strand of brown hair behind her ear.

“So, Emma, do you live around here?” I asked once we were back in the kitchen and began pouring her a glass of wine.

“I live in Ohio,” she shook her head. “I’m one of the editors for Alternative Press.”

“Oh wow,” Megan smiled. “Is that how you met Jack?”

The grin on Emma’s face spread from ear to ear. “Yeah. I sat in on one of the bands photo shoots and immediately had a crush on him. But I’m really not a ‘make the first move’ kind of girl at all, so I kept it to myself. A year later, he finally asked me out to dinner.”

“That’s so sweet,” I smiled as I slid her glass towards her.

Cassadee and Rian arrived a little while later. After greeting everyone, Cassadee stole Will from Megan and Rian joined the other guys outside.

“So have you guys talked more about having your own baby?” I asked her.

She nodded as she swallowed a sip of wine. “Yeah. We agree we want to be married first, though. Which I’m ok with. You know, Rian’s pretty traditional when it comes to that sort of stuff. He likes things to be in order.”

From what I’d witnessed, Rian was a pretty organized person, so that didn’t surprise me.

A few moments and glasses of wine later, our dinner was ready and spread out across the dining room table that hardly ever saw any action. The ten of us scrunched around the eight person table and while I had a full plate in front of me, I ignored it so I could feed Will. Everyone ate among light chatter while my mouth watered, the food on my plate still steaming. Alex quickly raked forkful after forkful into his mouth and soon he was done before offering to finish feeding Will so I could eat. I almost objected until my stomach let out a huge rumble. I was quick to eat once Will started crying, signaling that it was his bedtime. I took him from Alex and excused myself from the table to put him to bed.

“Need some help?” Alex asked as he entered Will’s room where I was wiping him down with a wet rag.

“I’ve got it,” I smiled. “You go back to our guests.”

He inched his way towards me and wrapped his arms around my waist before moving my hair to the side, trailing light kisses down my exposed neck.

“Have I told you yet today how thankful I am for you?” he whispered.

I twirled around in his embrace, resting a hand on each of his biceps.

“You haven’t, actually,” I teased.

He grinned and licked his lips. “Well I am. I’m incredibly thankful. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Is that so?” I giggled, stretching to nibble lightly on his jaw bone.

“Mhm,” he moaned. “You’re the best girlfriend ever. You’re the best mother ever. You’re the best future wife ever. You’re the best friend ever.”

“Whoa, best friend?” I asked, stretching more to reach his earlobe. “What about Jack?”

“Well Jack isn’t the one unfairly turning me on right now, is he?” he laughed.

“You’re right,” I giggled. “I’m sorry. But, for what it’s worth, you’re the best everything ever as well.”

He took my chin between his thumb and index finger and slowly lifted my lips to his, connecting them in a gentle kiss. My hands slid from his biceps into the back of his hair, my fingers twisting in. He pulled away shortly and kissed the tip of my nose.

“I love you, baby,” he whispered as his forehead fell against mine.

“I love you,” I whispered back. “Get back in there, I’ll be just a sec.”

After getting Will to sleep, I rejoined everyone in the dining room. We all finished eating, and everyone but me and Megan crowded around the television to catch the tail end of a big football game. She was helping me clean the dishes, drying as I washed.

“So, about this ‘moving to California’ thing,” she said.

I groaned, my head falling back in exasperation.

“Oh yeah,” she laughed. “You’re not going to get by without finishing that conversation. So, spill. Why are you having to think about it so much?”

I glared at her momentarily as I handed her a plate. “I don’t know. I just am. This is a big decision to make without thinking it over thoroughly.”

“Ok,” she nodded, slinging the towel over her shoulder. “List the pros and the cons. Pros first.”

“Well,” I sighed. “It is a beautiful house. You’ve heard me go on for years about wanting to live somewhere like that. It’s a short walk away from the beach. It’s in a beach city, with electric beachy vibes. It’s in Venice Beach of all places. And, when we were actually in the house, I could totally see us living our life there. Plus, Alex loves it, too.”

“And the cons?” Megan smiled.

Again, I sighed heavily and turned the water off before leaning against the counter. “It’s just so far away from everyone. You, my mom, my dad. I’d miss you guys too much.”

“Yeah,” she frowned. “I don’t even remember a time when we didn’t live in the same city.”

I nodded, my expression screaming, ‘see?’.

“But that is still no reason for you to turn this experience down. I’ll constantly come to visit you, and in the meantime, we can Skype or talk on the phone or whatever. And I know for a fact that Gwen and Johnny would kick your ass if they knew you were turning down your dream home because it was too far away from them.”

“Yeah, but,” I paused.

“But what?” she huffed, and I could tell she was getting irritated by me.

“It’s just too expensive. I don’t know if I’d be able to live with myself in that house knowing how much Alex paid for it.”

“Seriously? How bad could it be?”

I glanced around quickly to make sure no one was within hearing distance. “$700,000.”

Her eyes widened and I could see she was trying to mask her shock when she said, “Whoa. Yeah, ok. But, still. If Alex is willing to pay that much for a home you both love – you have to remember, it’s not just for you – then you should let him do it. If he loves you enough to give this to you, say ‘thank you’, give him some extra special lovin’ and move to California.”

“Megan,” I laughed as I gently shoved her shoulder. “You are ridiculous.”

She smiled and picked up a casserole dish to dry. “Well, if it makes the decision any easier, you have my blessing.”

The living room erupted with cheers as one of the teams scored a touchdown. Alex was quick to silence them, and I held my breath as we waited for a scream from an awakened Will. It remained silent and Alex looked around at everyone, a look of relief on his face.

“Remember,” he whispered, lightly clapping his hands together. “Sleeping baby. Golf clap.”

The rest of the audience joined him, whispering their apologies and I laughed.

“Maybe.”

Notes