Mickey’s POV:

I was sitting downstairs on the couch in front of the TV. There was some stupid show on that I was only watching to fill in the time. You probably couldn’t even call it ‘watching.’ It was more like a background noise while I was staring aimlessly at the screen. All I was really doing was dying my hair yet again.

My hair was sporting that faded purple colour. It really needed freshening up. Faded purple was not the look for me. It looked used up and dead. And I was not used up.

I was wearing some old shirt that was just a bit too tight to make sure I one, was not naked, and two, did not get hair dye all over my favourite clothes. In the end, my hair was tied up in a plastic bag. Not because I was trying to trap heat to speed up the process, but because my mom would literally not let me take a step out of the bathroom without that plastic bag creating a barrier.

So, there I was, watching TV but not really watching, waiting until I could wash my hair and continue on to the next step, when there was a knock at the front door. I looked around to see if my mom was close by, but when I didn’t see her, I decided to go check myself. Yes, there was a plastic bag on my head, yes I was wearing some old shirt, but who cared? If it was anything important, my mom would have been here waiting.

I opened the door to find Rian to my surprise. I frowned at him, wondering what the fuck he was doing here right now. We hadn’t spoken since Alex and I broke up, which made sense to me. Afterall, Alex was his best friend and original friend. I only came later, he had to be on his boy’s side, not mine.

“Hi…” Rian seemed to have his own questions as he glanced up at the plastic bag. “Umm…”

“I’m dying my hair,” I quickly explained with a sigh. He could have easily ignored it.

“Oh, okay, well,” he nodded and moved his gaze back down to my eyes, “umm, I just wanted to check how you’re doing.”

“I’m good,” I shrugged and leaned against the door, one hand still holding the inside handle.

“Okay… are you sure?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s just that Alex was pretty distraught after your break up and I realised that while I was there for him, I completely neglected you.” He scratched the back of his head, looking down at the floor. It was obvious that he was feeling guilty.

“Nah, I’m all good.” I smiled to calm his nerves.

He double checked. “Really?”

“Yeah!” I reassured him enthusiastically. “I’m the one that broke up with him after all.”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t be upset about it,” he told me honestly with a hint of concern.

“Right.”

“I know that your relationship was special to you. Even though you didn’t really like showing it, you were obviously happy and it obviously meant a lot.”

“Mhmm,” I nodded.

“It can be quite upsetting for a relationship to end so suddenly.”

“Yeah.”

“Just know that I’m here for you.”

“Okay, well, thanks,” I rushed out as I started closing the door.

“Umm, no proble–” I cut off Rian’s confused tone by shutting the door on him.

As soon as I heard that front door click, I was gone. I ran all the way up the stairs, right into my room. I slammed that door, much less composed than I had been a second before, and fell onto my bed. As soon as my body hit the mattress, a loud sob forced its way through my throat and out my mouth. It was so painful.

“Mickey?!” I heard my mom call out as I could no longer hold back the tears.

I couldn’t respond to her even if I wanted to. My breathing was too irregular and mixing uncomfortably with salty tears. It almost felt like I was choking, my heart was literally hurting.

“Mickey,” my mom gasped softly as she entered my room without warning. She rushed to my side. “What’s wrong?”

“Why did he have to be such a fucking asshole?” I hiccuped as I looked at her through my very blurry vision.

“Oh,” she sighed in sympathy and sat down, moving my head so it was in her lap, not even caring that she could get the hair product on her despite the plastic bag, “I know.”

––––

I laid on bed crying with my mom for quite a while longer. She let me cry it all out and rant about everything. Much unlike she usually did, she just sat there, listening to me, not giving her own opinion. I had been denying my feelings for so long, that it all hitt me at the same time, stabbing me over and over again. I don’t know why whatever Rian said made me break down, but I had to do everything in my power not to do it in front of him.

Despite crying until I couldn’t anymore, I still felt a little better. Like I wasn’t trying to hold back an overflowing river any longer.

Eventually, I had washed out all the colour remover in my hair. It was just a bit later than I had originally intended, but luckily my hair wasn’t completely ruined. As soon as that was all out, I slapped on the colour, because there was no way I was going to walk around with that even more faded mess for more than a few minutes.

Once again, I took my position on the couch downstairs. And once again, there was somebody at my door and I was the only one downstairs. Part of me was afraid that it was Rian, that he had seen me bawling my eyes out in my room. But he wouldn’t call me out like that. Right? He wouldn’t come over and tell me he saw me. He’d either leave me be or maybe give me a quick phone call.

Well, I wished it was Rian there to call my bluff, because what I got was even worse. I was met with the one and only Alex Gaskarth on the other side of the door.

“Oh,” I huffed out, a little scared that it was obvious that I had been crying. My eyes were still burning slightly and I felt like my cheeks were puffy. Last time I checked in the mirror, I looked fine, but I had just gotten out of the shower. Maybe I no longer looked fine?

“Hey,” he smiled sheepishly, his hands behind his back and only checking out my hair plastic bag for a brief second.

“What do you want,” I grumbled, really not wanting or needing this conversation right now. “Did you leave some of your stuff here that you want back?”

“No,” he quickly shook his head, “well, yes, but no.”

“Then what do you want?!” I repeated with much frustration.

“Willyougotopromwithme?”

“What?” I raised my eyebrows.

He took a deep breath and said the words much slower this time, “will you go to prom with me?”

“No, I heard you, you fucking asshole.” I couldn’t believe that I cried about him. How could he even ask me that?

“Oh.” His face fell, which fueled my rage even more. Why would he ever think he even had the slightest change?

“Why would I want to go to prom, let alone with you?”

He shrugged nonchalantly. “Well, you kind of owe it to me, really.”

“Owe it to you?! Really? Fuck off.” I didn’t even want to wait to hear what other bullshit he was going to spew out.

So, I didn’t. I grabbed hold of the door and swung it shut. Simple as that. Or so I thought. Alex quickly forced his foot in front of it, causing the door to come to an abrupt halt before it got the chance to close.

“Wait,” he said in a much weaker and less confident voice, “please.”

“Look,” I slowly opened the door again, “you can’t just come here asking me to prom after we broke up, acting like you own the right. I’d rather you just leave now.”

“No, that all came out wrong!”

“It came out wrong?” I laughed, the rage turning into fury. “Are you fucking with me? No, I will not go with you. You know, I bet you sent Rian out here earlier today to test the waters.”

“What? Rian came over earlier?” He quickly looked back at Rian’s house and then back at me. “That has nothing to do with me. Just, please, consider it. You don’t owe it to me. I owe it to you. I’m the one who ruined this, I know that. Don’t let me fucking up ruin a last chance to create some good memories in high school.”

“I didn’t want to go to prom anyway, so it doesn’t matter,” I countered.

“Mickey,” he sighed, sounding just like all the times he would explain something to me in a loving way, “I don’t really care if you want to go with me for me or not. Just go to get some good memories with Rian and Jack, with friends. Yes, I’ll be there, they’re my friends too. But they all have dates. Going as my date doesn’t mean actually being my date. We’ll go as people who used to be together and now decided to tolerate each other, maybe even be friends. Plus, we won’t be lonely during photos.”

It felt weird to admit, but going did sound kind of good that way. I wasn’t going with Alex, I would be going with the entire group. I could deal with that. I still liked Rian and Jack. Before Alex and I started dating, I could tolerate him, I was sure I could somehow find that equilibrium again. He used to infuriate me so much as well.

“Okay,” I gave in, deciding against fighting for my pride. Alex suddenly grew a large smile. “But, I will only be going with you as a group, not with you as a date.”

“Of course, yes, I’m completely cool with that.” He nodded excitedly.

“Where are we meeting and at what time?” I asked before I’d have to call him again.

“My house, five pm, but I can come pick you up if you’d like.”

“I can drive myself just fine, thank you very much.”

“Yes, yes, of course.”

“Okay, well then I’ll see you then,” I told him, smiling genuinely at him, my feelings doing some properly flip-flopping today, “or earlier, or whatever. Anyway, I do have to wash out the dye in my hair.”

“Ah! That’s why you’ve got a bag on your head!”

“Exactly.” I started closing the door. “See ya.”

Notes

I just realised I never posted this part. Strange. I had it written a month ago and was about to put up chapter 68 instead.