Long Live Us
Nineteen
We've been in the studio for two whole weeks and I've written enough material at last for the record. I was so exhausted with writing, I was pushed to my limits by my dad. I wrote a total of fifteen songs, 12 will be released on the record and the remaining three will be bonus content or saved for the next record if they stand the test of two years.
But today I was going to lay some rhythm guitar tracks under Matt Squire, our producer, and my dad, my mentor and co-producer. I was excited since I was getting the chance to just relax behind my guitar and work on my guitar parts to add to the words I wrote down.
"Alright, Stell you need to make sure you keep up with the tempo of the song. I'll start the metronome and then you start playing after the count in," my dad explained.
"Got it," I replied as I prepped myself to start playing. Jack was sitting in the corner of the room with his dad, Tom, and Matt.
The metronome started the count and then I started playing when I got the signal. I allowed myself to be lost in my music as I played the melody I wrote to compliment my lyrics and Jack's lead guitar in perfect harmony. Every note sang out perfectly as I allowed my fingers to dance on my frets as I picked along. When my segment that I wanted to lay down was done, I laid my guitar on my lap and moved my hair out of my eyes.
"Nice work, let's get another take to make sure it's flawless. After that we'll do do the next segment," Squire said as he prepped the mix deck to record a second take.
When I was finally done with recording for the morning, I went to my lesson with Tom. I was kind of getting tired of doing this every day. I wanted to be free to do what ever it was I wanted and not have to fall into what everyone wanted me to.
"Stella, I need you to focus please," my tutor called me out of my thoughts. I was spacing a lot lately.
"Sorry," I mumbled as I went back into my studies.
"Stell,, please try to focus. You know that Dad wants us to finish school. So just buckle down and we'll be done in no time at all," Tom whispered to me in encouragement.
"I'm trying but I want to just forget school and just work on the record more," I told him.
"We can work more later. For now, just focus on the lesson," Tom went back to his work and I went back to mine. I hate this schooling crap. It's making it hard for me to have time to record the record and spend time with my boyfriend.
After the lesson was over, Dad took Tom and I out for dinner. We were meeting up with Mom and Noelle. Liam wasn't going to be there since he went to summer camp again with Alice. It was always nice to see my little sister. She's going to be six soon and she'll be a kindergartner. I was amazed at how much has changed with my life. I feel like my dad, skipping forward in time and seeing my siblings growing up and my mother getting more and more grey each day. I feel so bad for my dad since he wasn't around that much that I never noticed Noelle and Liam growing up, until now.
"Is something bothering you, Stella," my dad asked. I was quiet for most of what little we had already spent at dinner. I was so lost in my thoughts I was spacing out a lot.
"I was just thinking that's all," I replied as I started twirling my hair around my finger.
"She picked up your habit," Mom said as she watched me play with my hair.
"She was bound to start sooner or later," Dad replied.
"I wish I could stay home a little longer than what we'll be getting. I want to be home to see Noelle go to her first day of kindergarten," I told my parents.
"You know we can't Stella," Tom replied. God, he was quite the guy. He was so responsible and more mature than his age, and I was the silly girl trying to grow up but stay young forever. I was just like my dad with that trait. Forever the lost girl, since I can't be a lost boy like my dad due to a gender conflict.
"Go play music, Stelly. Mommy will take lots of pictures and make a movie out of my first day going to kindergarten," Noelle spoke cheerfully to me. I could tell she was trying to tell me that I have to move on sometime and that she doesn't mind that I'm growing up.
"But I want to be there to cheer you on and defend you from those yucky little boys," I told her.
"You didn't do so well since you have Jack always with you or on your mind," she replied. Damn, she's good.
"I don't want you to be like me, Noelle. I want you to be independent and not need a boy like Jack to keep you happy," I told her.
"But I am like that. Mommy and Daddy and Liam keep me happy along with my toys," Noelle replied.
So with that eventful dinner, I realized that I am being carried away by the tides of adulthood. My career was forcing me away from home. My parents were letting me be my own person and have a love life with my boyfriend. My pre-teen brother is off on his own adventures with his friends. And my baby sister is making me realize that I need to leave my shelter and let her grow up without me there.
How does my dad do it all the time, being able to balance everything? I want to learn his secret before I get older and have my own family. Knowing me, I won't be letting my career go and I want a family of my own with Jack. I'll need all the help with balance I can get. If I don't, I'll fall off this tight rope and fall to the ground, where there is no air mattress or safety net to catch me.
But today I was going to lay some rhythm guitar tracks under Matt Squire, our producer, and my dad, my mentor and co-producer. I was excited since I was getting the chance to just relax behind my guitar and work on my guitar parts to add to the words I wrote down.
"Alright, Stell you need to make sure you keep up with the tempo of the song. I'll start the metronome and then you start playing after the count in," my dad explained.
"Got it," I replied as I prepped myself to start playing. Jack was sitting in the corner of the room with his dad, Tom, and Matt.
The metronome started the count and then I started playing when I got the signal. I allowed myself to be lost in my music as I played the melody I wrote to compliment my lyrics and Jack's lead guitar in perfect harmony. Every note sang out perfectly as I allowed my fingers to dance on my frets as I picked along. When my segment that I wanted to lay down was done, I laid my guitar on my lap and moved my hair out of my eyes.
"Nice work, let's get another take to make sure it's flawless. After that we'll do do the next segment," Squire said as he prepped the mix deck to record a second take.
When I was finally done with recording for the morning, I went to my lesson with Tom. I was kind of getting tired of doing this every day. I wanted to be free to do what ever it was I wanted and not have to fall into what everyone wanted me to.
"Stella, I need you to focus please," my tutor called me out of my thoughts. I was spacing a lot lately.
"Sorry," I mumbled as I went back into my studies.
"Stell,, please try to focus. You know that Dad wants us to finish school. So just buckle down and we'll be done in no time at all," Tom whispered to me in encouragement.
"I'm trying but I want to just forget school and just work on the record more," I told him.
"We can work more later. For now, just focus on the lesson," Tom went back to his work and I went back to mine. I hate this schooling crap. It's making it hard for me to have time to record the record and spend time with my boyfriend.
After the lesson was over, Dad took Tom and I out for dinner. We were meeting up with Mom and Noelle. Liam wasn't going to be there since he went to summer camp again with Alice. It was always nice to see my little sister. She's going to be six soon and she'll be a kindergartner. I was amazed at how much has changed with my life. I feel like my dad, skipping forward in time and seeing my siblings growing up and my mother getting more and more grey each day. I feel so bad for my dad since he wasn't around that much that I never noticed Noelle and Liam growing up, until now.
"Is something bothering you, Stella," my dad asked. I was quiet for most of what little we had already spent at dinner. I was so lost in my thoughts I was spacing out a lot.
"I was just thinking that's all," I replied as I started twirling my hair around my finger.
"She picked up your habit," Mom said as she watched me play with my hair.
"She was bound to start sooner or later," Dad replied.
"I wish I could stay home a little longer than what we'll be getting. I want to be home to see Noelle go to her first day of kindergarten," I told my parents.
"You know we can't Stella," Tom replied. God, he was quite the guy. He was so responsible and more mature than his age, and I was the silly girl trying to grow up but stay young forever. I was just like my dad with that trait. Forever the lost girl, since I can't be a lost boy like my dad due to a gender conflict.
"Go play music, Stelly. Mommy will take lots of pictures and make a movie out of my first day going to kindergarten," Noelle spoke cheerfully to me. I could tell she was trying to tell me that I have to move on sometime and that she doesn't mind that I'm growing up.
"But I want to be there to cheer you on and defend you from those yucky little boys," I told her.
"You didn't do so well since you have Jack always with you or on your mind," she replied. Damn, she's good.
"I don't want you to be like me, Noelle. I want you to be independent and not need a boy like Jack to keep you happy," I told her.
"But I am like that. Mommy and Daddy and Liam keep me happy along with my toys," Noelle replied.
So with that eventful dinner, I realized that I am being carried away by the tides of adulthood. My career was forcing me away from home. My parents were letting me be my own person and have a love life with my boyfriend. My pre-teen brother is off on his own adventures with his friends. And my baby sister is making me realize that I need to leave my shelter and let her grow up without me there.
How does my dad do it all the time, being able to balance everything? I want to learn his secret before I get older and have my own family. Knowing me, I won't be letting my career go and I want a family of my own with Jack. I'll need all the help with balance I can get. If I don't, I'll fall off this tight rope and fall to the ground, where there is no air mattress or safety net to catch me.
Notes
Stella has a lot on her plate. Poor girl.I've missed you guys. Please don't be shy and leave us lots of comments. We love them and they let us know if we're doing right by you guys.
11/4/13