Lily's POV

I stared at the leaves clumped on the ground. I'd come to the park, Alex didn't want me coming here, it was late but I needed to get away, to think about what had happened.

"If you were here to me this-."

"Oh for fuck sake Lily, get real," Alex spat back. "If you checked more...forget it..."

I shook my head at the image of him storming out of the nursery. I concentrated on the leaves again to distract me from the situation, it didn't work. I wiped the tears away. It wasn't just another stupid argument with Alex. It was so much more than that.

Suddenly light footsteps caught my attention interrupting me from my thoughts. I kept my eyes on the ground as someone sat on the swing next to mine. There was a moment of silence before his deep voice broke it.

"Life's a bitch. Isn't it?"

"She was just given to me," my voice wobbled.

Zach's sight landed on Annabelle in my tight hold. He sat opposite, placed his hand on my thigh and said, "I'm so sorry, Lily."

"No," I cried. "She's going to wake up soon." I rocked back and forth tightening my grip around my child.

"Lily..." Andy's voice shook me out of my mind. I quickly looked into his deep blue eyes. "Saying it's going to be all right isn't going to help much but-"

"It's my fault. Should've checked on her more...how stupid of me...I pretty much let my child die," my words flooded out, full of pain. My Annabelle was gone.

Water from the shower ran off her body. Zach climbed in the bath and wrapped his arms around me. I cried. I cried to let out all the pain.

"What's God playing at?" Zach asked quietly. I sniffed and mumbled.

"Some sick little game."

"Did you hear what I said?"

I blinked at Andy's words. "S-she's gone..."

"And it's so fucked up," he placed his arm around my waist, holding me close. "Look at the sky. It's full of stars."

They twinkled. It was beautiful to look at.

"Annabelle's up there," he continued. I snuggled up closer, I needed some physical contact. This should be Alex with me, not Andy.

"You're leaving?" Alex shouted. "No we need to sort this out. It's late..."

"Don't care Alex. I need to get some fresh air."

I couldn't hold the pain in anymore, tears erupted. Andy's grip tightened. My baby was gone and it was all my fault. Zach said it wasn't. However the most important person to me, said it was. That's why he's not here.

After I'd stopped crying, I listened to his heart beating.

"You know Alex is suffering over this as much as you?"

"He blames me for it Andy," I sniffed.

"No he doesn't."

l sat up. "You didn't see the an-"

"Stop it Lily," Andy raised his voice. "The situation is so fucked up. Emotions are higher than ever. He's angry because your child died. Blaming you is easy to do, doesn't mean Alex actually blames you. I can tell how much he loves you."

"Why does-"

"It's easy to blame eachother but you guys shouldn't," he replied as he got up and held his hand out. "Come on, I'll take you home."

I didn't want to but I knew it was the right thing. Alex must be so worried about me. Angry even. My eyes widened at the thought of him having a panic attack and I'm not there. "Ok..."

As soon as we entered the house Alex had me in his arms and Andy had left us alone. I pulled away to catch a tear run down his cheek.

"I'm sorry," he sniffed. "It was wrong for me-"

"Don't," I forced out. "You were angry, in pain. We both are Alex. We'd just gotten her and she was taken away just like that..."

He quickly swung his arms around me and whispered, It's just chemicals, we will get through it. I love you.

My arms tightened around his waist. I tried to keep myself from crying.

Do it. Let the pain out.

That's what we did. Now we gazed up at the ceiling from our bed.

"You know I called her Anna?"

I glanced up at Alex's bloodshot eyes. He smirked for a second before he continued. "When I was alone with her she smiled, gurgled and I swear a little giggle with the name so it stuck."

My sight went back to the ceiling. He took my hand in his, gave it a little squeeze. "We will get through this Lily. I promise."

l pulled my hand away. "Will we though?"

"Yes," Alex bolted up and crossed his legs. "We've got to stick together. Lily we will get through this," he reassured.

I wasn't sure if it was the pain but something told me we weren't going to get through this.

Notes

I'm sorry!!! :(

It's just the next chapter and that's it for this story, I wanted to get it finished as it wasn't going in the path I'd intended it too with adding extra characters and stuff. I may re write it at some point and not sure about a sequel at this stage. Thank you to everyone that read this. I will get the last chapter up soon. I've wrote some of it already.