Lost In Neverland

We were walking to get ice cream, why was I even wasting my time with her? Once this damn tour was done we would never talk to one another. That was just a simple fact; right up there with the sky is blue. I don’t know why I was paying for her either; it wasn’t like she didn’t have money. I guess she just expected someone else to do it for her, if it wasn’t Daddy it was someone else and I was that someone else.

I paid for the ice cream and handed it to her. She just wanted vanilla which I just didn’t get, that seemed so boring and plain and bland. She smiled at me before it dropped off her face when she looked up at me. I sighed, this bothered me so much, she could at least fucking talk to me.

“Can we stop with the whole shy act? Not too long ago you were cursing me out because I was an asshole,” I grumbled.

“I’m sorry I don’t know what to say to you.”

“What? Do I scare you or something?”

“A little bit.”

Her eyes looked into mine and I looked away. That one hurt quite a bit. Yeah, I was a self-centered, egotistical, asshole but I was far from scary. I mean, hell, I was far from scary, I didn’t look scary. I mean, yeah I was an asshole but that doesn’t make me scary does? I looked down towards the ground so I wasn’t tempted to look at her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that,” she said.

“Yes you did,” I looked at her. “It’s whatever. I don’t care.”

Except I did care, I cared quite a bit. She didn’t even seem to believe what I was saying. Was I a shitty liar or did my face just give it away. Why did I even care if she found me scary? I didn’t give a shit what she thought about me. She thanked me and I brushed it off.

“Are you ready to go back to the venue,” I asked her.

“Um, not really. Why,” she asked as we approached, our dads outside. “Shit, I don’t want to go back yet.”

I sighed, “Ugh, fuck it.”

I grabbed her hand and dragged her down the road. I brought her to a playground that I knew was there, my mom would take me here when I was younger and my dad would be doing shows. It brought a small smile to my face to remember those days, when things were simpler. I really missed those days every now and then.

“Here, get in the tunnel,” I told her. “I’m positive they won’t find us here.”

We were in the tunnel that was roomier than it looked, even though it was made for small kids. My phone vibrated and I looked at the message from my dad. Pretty much Alex trusted me, we just had to be at bus call at two. As long as we were safe they didn’t really care. I showed her the phone and she smiled, leaning over and kissing my cheek.

I couldn’t tear my eyes away from that smile, it was so beautiful. She was beautiful. I never wanted her to stop smiling. I didn’t even hear what she said I was so focused on her lips on my cheek and the smile you could see in her eyes. I merely let her take my hand and drag me along with her.

Notes

Sorry this took a while, had some massive writer's block on this but Bree helped me out with some ideas. It probably isn't good but I'm blaming writer's block. So, I got a new tattoo on Wednesday and I got my wisdom teeth out the next day. That recovery took no time so that's why there's an update!

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- Jess