You've got to hold on.

Alex's POV

It was new years and I seriously didn't know what to do with myself as I am totally not used to the house being completely full off people.
Jacks friends was round and I quickly went outside before I went into meltdown.

The snow was still settled and form the first time in ages I thought it was gorgeous instead if it trying to kill me because of how cold it was.
"Alex come inside its freezing out here." Joyce said.
I shook my head and sat on the step and looked at the garden.
"Is it because there's loads of people?" She asked.
"A little, I just want to be on my own and let Jack have some free time away from because I know I'm annoying." I said and looked down.
I heard Joyce walk over and sit next to me.
"Jack is really worried about you. When you go off like you do sometimes he doesn't sleep until he knows your okay. He doesn't find you annoying. Your anything but annoying in this house." She said.
"He shouldn't be with someone like me. I'll just ruin and destroy him." I said.
"You won't do any of those things Alex. Jack adores you. I havent seen him this happy since his grandparents died." She said.
"He shouldn't adore someone like me. There's nothing nice about me." I said.
"Lex that isn't true." I heard Jack say from behind me.
I turned round and looked at him.
Jack came over and sat next to me as his mum got up and went inside.

"Why do you think so negatively about yourself?" Jack asked and looked out to the garden.
"Because its easy to pick the negative out than the positive." I said quietly and looked down.
"Okay, we're going to sit out here for as long as possible and everything you tell me what you hate about yourself and I will tell you what I love about you." He said with a small smile.
"But your missing the party and missing being with your friends." I said.
"Your missing the party too. They understand, they want to get to know you as well Lex." He said.
"But we have to be done by this evening as me and you are gonna get proper drunk." He said and I smiled.

Jack turned and faced me.
"Okay tell me something you don't like about yourself." He said.
I turned and faced him.
"I don't like my body." I said quietly.
"Your body is beautiful. If anyone tells you any different then you tell me and I'll tell them different." Jack said,
"My scars are disgusting." I said and looked at my arms.
"You scars tell people that you are fighting a war with your mind and you are refusing to give up and let your mind win." He said.
"I don't like my smile." I said looking more down.
I felt Jack making me look at him.
"Your smile is gorgeous, it always makes me stop and look at you." He said which made me smile a little.
Jack kissed my cheek.
"What else is there?" Jack asked.
"My eyes." I said and Jack looked at me as if I slapped him round the face.
"How can you hate your eyes!? Its like looking at my favourite chocolate part from I can't eat it, but I do get to look at them all day." He said and I couldn't help but chuckle.
"Everything you hate about yourself I will love. No matter what you think I love every bit off you and your past doesn't make me think of you any less." Jack said and kissed me which I returned.
I heard the door open and saw the buff guy looking at us.
"Food is up if you two want any and if you have both finished eating each other faces." He said.
"Fuck off Zack." Jack chuckled and got up and helped me up.
"That's Zack, he's a bit quiet but get a few drinks him later and he's the most chattiest people ever. And the other person who's slightly shorter than me is Rian, he's okay since he gets to know you." Jack said and I nodded and we went inside.

It was safe to say we was all drunk and was singing drunkly while trying not to knock the younger kids over since they was allowed to stay up to see the new year in.
"So yooour the famous Alex which Jack keeps talking about." The buff giy who I now know was called Zack slurred and dragging the your out a little.
"Yeah, that's me." I said feeling myself beginning to fall
"You failed to mention how cute he is." Zack said and I felt myself being pulled to Jacks side.
"And he's all mine." Jack said and kissed the side of my head.
"I'm outside smoking if you need me." I said and got myself outside.
"Alex your fucked come back inside." I heard Jack say as he came outside.
"I'm fine. I'm not even drunk yet." I slurred and Jack chuckled and walked over to me and pulled me close to him.
"Really? Then how come you nearly fell over inside." Jack chuckled.
"Okay maybe I'm a little pissed but shush, don't tell anyone." I said and put my finger on Jacks lips.
Jack chuckled and I felt him kiss my finger.
"Boys come inside now! You'll freeze how many more times do I have yo tell you!" Joyce scolded us.
"Smoking." I said and Joyce looked at Jack.
"Making sure he does nothing stupid." Jack said.
"Really, well you better hurry up because there's more drinks, and don't forget Zack and Rian and crashing in your room tonight, so no funny business you two." She said seriously and I slapped Jacks ass hard which made him grunt and little and I just started to laugh.
Joyce just rolled her eyes and left me and Jack to it.

Me and Jack just literally flopped on his bed stripped down to our pants.
"Jesus guys if you two want sex then just say and I'll leave." Zack said and crashed on the air bed.
"Alex is to fucked to even move right now." Jack chuckled.
I felt myself heave and I guess Jack did as well as he literally pulled me up and put a bowl on my lap.
"Puke in the bowl and not over me, the bed or the others." He said and rubbed my back.
Once I threw up and just passed out on Jacks shoulder.

Notes

I'm so sorry I have not updated in the last fee days I kinda went on a mega piss up and then went to work so I had no time to write... well I did but I had no WiFi and I was too hungover to even think...