Can I Say I'm Sorry?

"Good mor-oh," I said as I rolled over to see no one was beside me.

I climbed out of bed and saw that his clothes were still scattered across the floor. I picked his shirt off of the floor and threw it on over my naked body and picked my underwear on to wear underneath. I walked out of my room and into the kitchen where I saw Jack standing over the stove, cooking something. I snuck up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"Holy shit," he breathed out.

"Morning," I smiled.

"Morning beautiful. Are you wearing my shirt?"

I looked down at the maroon shit that was way too long on me. I didn't say a word as he smiled at me and pecked my lips. I kept smiling because I felt really good. That's when I caught view of the sheer amount of hickies on his neck and chest.

"Did I do that," I asked, touching one or two of them

"Yeah, well, you didn't get off free either though. Well, good thing you're not in the public eye too much. I'll come up with something for these," he told me.

"What are you cooking?"

"Well, I was going to bring you breakfast in bed but I guess we'll eat together."

"Well, they're burning Jack."

I laughed as he turned around, desperate to salvage the eggs that he were cooking. I heard him curse under his breath as I continued laughing. I heard the pans clattered and felt arms around my waist. I squealed as he tickled me, his breath on my neck as I was doubled over. I felt his lips on my neck and I melted into his touch.

"Shit, I just realized we never ate this Chinese food," he said, taking notice of the smell of the food that was left out all night.

I looked over and sighed, knowing it would have to go to the trash can outside. I looked down at the phone in my hand and saw a text from Zack. He was asking me how I was so I replied that Jack was over. After I sent him that I looked and saw the messages between Alex and I. I felt my heart sink a little. I didn't want Jack to simply be rebound because I did like him. Nowhere to the same extent as Alex, in fact nowhere close. Jack simply made me feel good on the inside. Alex made me feel something that I couldn't put into words, I felt...complete...with Alex there.

I mean Jack and I fucked, that's it. We were anything but together. Hell, he was probably going to go home and forget all about it because I was simply another girl. Maybe I was just destined to be alone. Maybe I was okay with that. I mean if we look at my track record it isn't very good as it is. In fact, it is quite the opposite.

"Shay are you okay," Jack asked.

"Huh, yeah I'm fine," I said.

"Really, cause you're crying."

I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling myself into his lap. I cried into his shoulder and I felt his arm rub my lower back. I felt his lips in my hair and I never thought I would see this part of him, the soft part that he kept hidden. I pushed myself into his thin frame, desperate to cling to him.

"Don't cry princess," he whispered.

"I don't want to hurt you," I whispered.

"You can't hurt me Shayley. I'm going to hurt you before you hurt me."

"I hurt everyone Jack. It's only a matter of time until I hurt you too. You're close to me, it's going to happen."

"Shay, be my plus one to Alex's wedding please. You deserve to be invited but she hates you so that's why you weren't invited. If he isn't going to bring the most beautiful girl in the world then I am going to."

"I don't want to see him."

"You know you're still a shitty liar right."

I didn't say a word as I listened to his heart beat. I didn't want to hurt Jack like I had hurt Alex, like I had hurt Mark. That's what was bound to happen if he pushed any further with me I was bound to hurt him too. I was a forbidden fruit, something to be desired but not to hold.

"Smile Shay, you look so much better with that smile on," he told me.

"I thought you liked how I look with nothing on better," I joked.

"Not even a comparison babe. Though combined you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and I've seen some women in my life."

"Jack, thanks."

"Anytime babe, anytime."

He helped me off of his lap and we walked over to the couch. He put on some really crappy horror movie and I curled into his lap, neither of us really felt like doing anything today. Then again, I felt happy in his arms and I didn't really want to leave right now. I looked up at him through my eyelashes and he kissed me softly. It wasn't going to lead to anything like the kisses from last night. It just told me that he didn't want me to leave.

"I have to go back to Baltimore soon to visit family. Do you want to come with me," he asked.

"Sure, I should probably see my parents too, it's been a few years since I have," I told him.

"Well, we're leaving Friday."

"Okay babe."

He smiled down to me when I called him that. He wasn't mine and I wasn't him but neither of us wanted to lose the other. Right now it felt like he was the only thing that I had that wasn't going to fade away. I didn't even feel like I had to hold him tightly to make sure he wasn't a mirage. It just seemed like things were going good for me and I didn't have the fear or the curiosity of how long it would last because just one more day right now seemed like an eternity.

I felt my phone vibrate and I saw that it was Zack responding. He was telling me that Jack wasn't good enough for me but I don't remember where I asked him. I didn't respond. I wasn't going to let him ruin my sunshine. I was happy and that was good enough for me right now.

Notes

I've just been sad today and I've felt really alone so I decided to write. This is just a filler but they're going to Baltimore together and that's pretty freaking cute if you ask me. Also, my parents football team and mine play each other on Thursday so all hell is gonna break loose which is gonna be interesting.

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Title credit: Different For Girls - Dierks Bentley