Everything Better Plan
twenty eight.
Olivia's POV
"You look incredible," Alex breathed as I stepped down the stairs on Sunday night. It was New Year's Eve and we were just about to go to the beach to enjoy Alex's usual NYE plans which he'd been kind enough to invite Samuel and I along to. He had told me they'd be performing a small set and there would be fireworks and drinks; I was genuinely excited to have a nice night beneath the stars and spend the special occasion with old and new friends.
"It's just jeans and a sweater," I laughed as he held me out at arms length to examine me, his eyes wandering over my body at a snail's pace; I felt my cheeks turning a shade of red, "Stop it," I playfully slapped his shoulder and his eyes returned to mine.
"I'm sorry," he mock-defended, "you just... you're stunning," he murmured, his own cheeks reddening. He grabbed my face in his hands and pulled me into a hard, desperate kiss, like he couldn't handle not kissing me any longer. I returned the kiss with just as much force, and we probably wouldn't have stopped and just continued to get lost in the moment if we hadn't heard a car honking outside. It was Samuel, picking us up in our cab so we could get to the beach together. It was around 7 PM and the boys were set to perform at around 8 PM, so we had to hurry.
The dock was lined with fairy lights leading to this small bar set up beside the makeshift stage. Everybody was already there waiting for us by the time we arrived. Alex apologised to the boys as they hurried about trying to ensure guitars were all correctly tuned and microphones were working fine. Samuel and I joined Amelia and Cass at the bar; they were already drinking and chatting away, and so we ordered our drinks and listened as they told stories about last year and the year before; just cute little memories which I wished I had been a part of, but I was also just grateful to be here now and enjoying these brand new memories we were about to create with these great people.
"One year, Jack was so excited when it turned midnight that he jumped in the freezing sea completely clothed and for the rest of the night we had to listen to him complain that he had pneumonia – needless to say, he didn't get pneumonia," Cass told Samuel and I as Amelia flung her head back in laughter, remembering the ridiculous memory.
"Yeah, no life threatening medical conditions, just wet skinny jeans and sheer stupidity," Amelia added between laughs.
"Sheer stupidity and a sheer white shirt," Cass added, causing us all to laugh further. I loved hearing stories about the boys from the time they had been missing from my life, it made up for having not actually been there; I felt included, in a very small way.
"And that one time Zack and Alex got into a heated debate about the best Kanye West album and that girl threatened to call the police because she thought they were actually gonna fight," Amelia spoke, her eyes lighting up at the memory as she nudged Cassadee.
"Oh my god, yes!" Cass laughed, turning to Samuel and I, "they were so angry and honestly I think I would've actually called the police, like there was definitely gonna be a brawl," she explained and we all laughed.
"I still stand by my decision," Zack mumbled as he approached us, reaching around Amelia to grab a half empty bottle of beer which was perched on the fencing around the pier. We laughed as he took a swig, smirking.
"Okay, really man?!" Alex yelled from where he stood with Jack, trying to prep his equipment for their set, the look on his face pure frustration as he shot daggers in Zack's direction. I was amazed Alex had even heard him over the sounds of people chattering away and the strong, aggressive waves beneath us – and from such a distance.
Zack shook his head and rolled his eyes, before turning to face the taller man, "I know I'm right, Twisted Fantasy is one of the best albums of all time," he grumbled under his breath as he moved back over towards the guys, leaving us pulling looks of amusement at each other.
"Dude! College Dropout went triple platinum!" Alex yelled defensively, throwing his arms up in exasperation whilst Zack chuckled, having successfully irritated his friend.
"Guys!" Rian yelled over the pair, pulling them a look of disbelief at how ridiculous they were being. Zack laughed whilst Alex mumbled under his breath in an agitated tone.
"See?" Cass chuckled, referring to the scene the boys had just made over absolutely nothing. I shook my head, laughing; Alex had always been like that, super passionate about the smallest of things. He once got himself into an actual fist fight in 4th grade because some kid in his science class said Pokémon was stupid – in fact, Alex had been close to getting expelled, over something as insignificant as a cartoon.
"Alright, we're ready," Rian appeared behind Cass, planting a kiss just above her ear before jogging back over to the stage where the rest of the boys were already in position. People began gathering around as Alex introduced the band to the crowd of both familiar and unfamiliar faces, we all placed our drinks down and made our way over to get a better view of the stage.
"Uh... this first song is called Weightless," Alex stated, seeming slightly uncomfortable as he spoke, probably because he was no longer used to addressing a crowd. They began the familiar rhythm of Weightless and without realising, I was miming along with the words; taken back to a time and a place where I would bounce around and dance ridiculously as the boys played.
"Wow, they're really good," Samuel leaned over and muttered to me and he bobbed his head along with the music. I looked up at him and smiled in agreement, pleased that my best friend was appreciative of the music I had once been surrounded by, especially this song which was practically the soundtrack to my whole high school experience.
They continued to play some more of the songs I had loved back in the day; Damned if I Do Ya, Lost in Stereo, Break Your Little Heart – if All Time Low had ever decided to pursue their music career, these songs definitely would've been their biggest hits; they were fun and upbeat, but still contained the odd deep, meaningful lyric that Alex was so well-known for. Samuel and I were dancing along, shaking our hips and nodding our heads along with the music, whilst Cass and Amelia did the same, emitting a few appreciative yells on occasion. Alex would catch my eye every now and again, smiling wide as he watched me mouth along dramatically, trying his best to suppress laughter.
"Alright, this next one's gonna be a little slower," Alex spoke into the mic softly looking down, he let out an awkward laugh as he removed his guitar and replaced it for an acoustic guitar instead and adjusted his mic so that he could take a seat on a stool. The other boys left the stage, coming to join us and watch as Alex solely took the stage. Rian pulled Cass under his arm, kissing the top of her head whilst she praised him; Zack doing the same with Amelia who pecked at his mouth sweetly. Jack came over to Samuel and I, I wrapped an arm around his waist to show my support of the set they'd just performed, he smiled, hugging me back whilst leaning around me with his spare arm to high-five Samuel. We untangled as Alex began to play the instrument to a tune I'd never heard before. "This is uh... Cinderblock Garden," he was clearly still nervous, despite the amazing reception they had received from the crowd. I raised an eyebrow up at Jack to indicate my confusion, having never heard of this song before. He shrugged, with a knowing smile, nodding his head back over towards the stage, instructing me to watch.
Wait, I think we're on to something we can't run from; fate
But we can let it take us down, down this road, where all our colours run together
Let's take the worst and make it better, let's take this mess and make a home
Alex glanced up briefly to meet my eyes, but quickly averted his gaze back down to the chords he was playing. He looked incredibly nervous, his face pale and hard as he focused on his guitar strings.
I know it gets hard for you to stay, but do you really wanna throw it all away?
Another brief look up at me, his eyes soft and flooded with emotions I couldn't quite register in the brief gaze we shared before his eyes were back down.
I'm thinking that we could make forever after all,
Finding the gold in our darkest moments, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
He began swaying his head along with the rhythm he was playing; his eyes closed and a small smile forming on his lips as he eased into the performance. I looked up at Jack with a raised eyebrow and he just smiled, seemingly answering all the questions I had as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and swayed me gently with him to the melody of the song.
Tonight, take all the ghosts and all those skeletons you hide, bury them deep beneath the ground
Let them rest, cause you weren't meant to bear that burden
Look at the roses in your garden, you can breathe now and forget
My eyes stayed fixated on his, watching him intently as he sang; his voice gruff and raspy. He looked up and met my eyes and held them there, his eyes were burnt chocolate; dark and mysterious, heavy with emotions he refused to unveil. His lip twitched into a smirk as he sang the last line, his eyes darting back down to his guitar as he fell back into the chorus. I could feel the rest of the guys' eyes burning into me, but I kept my gaze firmly on Alex as he licked his lip, his leg bouncing with nerves in time with the melody.
Forget it gets hard for you to stay, but we don't really have to throw it all away
I'm thinking that we could make forever after allFinding the gold in our darkest moment, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
I had my hands in a prayer-like gesture, covering my mouth as I kept my head down, my eyes peeking upwards at him, my cheeks a shade of pink and my smile uncontainable. He glanced up and bit his bottom lip, noticing how shy I had became, his cheekbones high as he tried to suppress his own smile. I felt Jack squeeze my shoulders tighter, pulling me into him as he too realised I had became a little bashful.
Just hold out for tomorrow, our dreams will follow
Follow us back to when, when nothing was broken
The future was open, let's go back again
His voice became louder and scratchier as he sung the bridge of the song, he flung his head back a little, completely lost in the words he was singing before he brought the tone back, a lot quieter now.
I'm thinking that we could make forever after all
Finding the gold in our darkest moment, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
His eyes were firmly connected with mine now, his eyes a soft, melted fudge as everyone else seemed to dissipate; leaving just me and him on the seafront. He continued to Oh-ohh...oohh-ohh..., bobbing his head along, smiling wide as he sang. I kept my eyes tight on his as he kept glancing back down just to ensure he was playing the correct chords, and then back up; he shot me a quick wink – not a cheeky wink, but a comforting wink. I heard Samuel squeal a little as he reached for my hand to squeeze it, whilst Jack's arm remained firmly around me, and I could feel his eyes watching me, a grin on his face awaiting my response as Alex struck the last chord and the crowd began cheering.
My face began to ache from smiling as he stood, wiped his ripped, black, skinny jeans down, took a playful bow and made his way off stage. I didn't really think about it, I just made a bee-line for him as he stepped down from the small height of the stage – if you could call it that. I caught him off guard as our bodies collided but he instantly grabbed me and lifted me into the air; my hands finding the sides of his face and pressing my lips to his with force, my legs flicking out behind me like I was in a 90s rom-com. He held me tight by my waist and kissed me back with the same desperate need to have our lips pressed together.
"That was beautiful," I mumbled into his lips, my forehead finding his and resting there; my eyes pouring into his. I pulled back a little, a cheeky grin on my face, "that was for me, right?" I asked, jokingly, causing a deep, gruff laugh to escape the boys lips.
"Well..." he trailed off, pulling an uncomfortable face like I had caught him out, making me laugh as he enveloped my lips in another kiss. The group began cheering and clapping as we kissed, laughing into each others lips. I had presumed that Alex would've informed most of them about our situation, but I heard Amelia ask Zack 'what about Derek' in a hushed tone; Zack just shushed her and continued to whistle.
"I..." I began, my brain searching frantically for the right word, but I couldn't locate it, "...really like you," I smiled meekly, feeling sheepish as I offered him the lousy description of my emotions.
"I really like you too," he grinned at me, pecking my lips one last time before lowering me to the ground, his eyes still silently conversing with mine. I knew that the pause I had left between my statement indicated to him the words I really wanted to say, without actually saying them; I knew he was aware of how I felt, it was just too soon for me to actually get the words out.
We all sat around a little campfire on the beach, beer bottles in our hands as the flames licked at the star encrusted night sky; the moon hanging high, mirroring in the now calm waves of the ocean stretched in front of us. Amelia was sat in Zack's lap and Cass and Rian held hands, sharing the odd meaningful look – the air was filled with romance, understandable considering New Year's Eve is often associated with couples.
"You two look so cute together," Amelia gushed, her eyes were clouded with intoxication but they still gleamed with genuineness. I looked over at Alex and we both crinkled our noses and shook our heads, pretending not to be into the idea. I bit my lip smiling, as he reached out to place a hand on my thigh.
"I mean, it was kinda obvious," Cassadee laughed, nudging Rian and looking around the group for approval, all of them nodding in agreement.
"Yeah, Christmas Eve, it was so apparent," Zack chuckled, referring back to the night we had all enjoyed karaoke.
"What? What was obvious?" Alex asked, looking confused.
"The chemistry," Amelia replied, in a 'duh' tone.
I looked over at Alex, tilting my head in surprise, "What?" Alex gasped, "It was obvious?" He too looked shocked.
"Uh... yeah!" Jack laughed, crinkling the bridge of his nose like his best friend was crazy, "Soooooo obvious."
Alex frowned, turning to shake his head in my direction, "I really thought we had them all fooled." The group laughed at that; the conversation slowly fading into something else whilst Alex and I remained in that moment. I was so aware of his fingers pressed to my thigh; the skin burning beneath my jeans, as he bit down on his lower lip, his eyes seeping into mine.
The guy running the event – he had introduced himself as Dylan Something and he ran Some Bar around the corner – was suddenly yelling into one of the mics, alerting to everyone that the countdown was about to begin. We all got to our feet and began counting down 10... 9... 8.... I looked at Alex sceptically, unaware of what to do in this situation; do we kiss and enter the new year together or do we not? I was a person who heavily believed in superstitious stuff like kisses at new year and what they mean, and under any other circumstances I probably wouldn't feel comfortable kissing someone I had been getting to know – well, getting to know again – for only a couple of weeks, but looking up into Alex's deep brown, inviting orbits, I felt a sudden compulsion to just do it; to take the risk and go for it.
7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1. Immediately, the sound of fireworks crashed around us, so loud it was almost deafening, as Alex leaned down and grabbed my face between his palms, bending at the knee to place a gentle kiss on my lips. I heard the others share their kisses; as well as the laughter that ensued after Jack pulled Samuel into a playful peck, in attempts for the pair to not be left out, but all I could focus on was kissing Alex. My hands encircled his neck and he moved a hand to my waist to pull me into him as I deepened the kiss a little; just enough to taste him, as I had been craving to do so all night.
"Alright, alright," Rian breathed, patting Alex's back, "that's enough kids," he chuckled, as we slowly peeled ourselves from one another; our eyes still locked intensely. "I'm goin' in, who's joining me?" Rian chirped as he began bunching his pants around his ankles; this caught mine and Alex's attention.
"Babeeeee!" Cass shrieked, a wide smile on her face as she watched her partner undress. None of us were drunk enough to blame alcohol for our stupid decisions, this was all on Rian.
"What?" he laughed, "I'm getting naked, not pulling a Jack on you guys," he referred to the story Cass had informed us of earlier; Jack diving into the ocean fully clothed and having to remain in his soaking attire for the remainder of the night.
"Okay, screw you, Dawson," Jack chirped as he pulled his own shirt over his head, earning a clap from Rian.
"Okay, I'm in!" Samuel announced and we all laughed at his eagerness to remove his own clothing. Rian was now fully nude and holding his manhood, jumping from foot to foot and shivering from the cold wind.
"Of course you're in!" I laughed, shaking my head at my best friend who was always keen to do anything a little raunchy – especially if it involved other naked men.
"Don't be a prude!" Samuel giggled, nudging me. I laughed as both Cass and Amelia began to undress too; Amelia pulling at Zack's arm, trying to persuade him to join too, until eventually he let out a heavy sigh and began undressing.
"You chicken, Gaskarth?" Jack challenged, now fully nude himself and grabbing his area protectively.
"Fuck no," Alex responded defensively as he began removing his shoes.
"You too?" I questioned, my eyes filled with both shock and excitement as I watched the group plan to participate in indecent exposure. Alex grinned up at me as he began unbuckling his pants.
"Come on, frigid," Samuel joked, removing my jacket for me. I slapped his hand away jokingly, but watching the others sent adrenaline coursing through my veins and I began to undress myself.
"Race you guys!" Jack called out as he ran off into the dark, his skinny butt jiggling as he moved. Rian took off after him, pulling Cass by the hand, whilst Samuel pulled me a face before running off himself. Amelia climbed onto Zack's naked back and hit his chest like she were whipping a horse.
Alex was now fully undressed, one hand barely covering his area whilst he motioned for me to grab his other as I removed my underwear. He had been continuously opening and clasping his hand towards me, begging me to grab him whilst watching the others laughing, but when he turned to face me; failing to cover my breasts, all of the excitement drained from his eyes and was replaced with a different kind of excitement. "Oh my god..." he breathed, stepping towards me, his hands finding my waist as he looked down at me seductively; his eyes devouring me.
"GUYS!" we heard Jack screaming over the sounds of waves and splashing, "HURRY UP, LAST ONE IN'S A ROTTEN EGG!" his voice childlike and filled with laughter.
The pair of us laughed at Jack's immature insult; Alex's eyes spilling into mine as he closed the gap between us and kissed me passionately, my breath hitching in my throat at the sheer intensity of the lust in his eyes and the neediness of his lips on mine. "I guess I'm a rotten egg, then," he mumbled into my mouth, a small smile forming on his lips as his tongue flicked against my bottom lip.
"Yeah..." I murmured, seeming disengaged, "I guess you are," I suddenly perked up, untangling him from me and darting around him to bolt to the ocean where I could hear everyone laughing and splashing each other. I slowed a little to turn and look at Alex, who was stood smirking, shaking his head at my deception. I laughed and stuck my tongue out at him teasingly, watching as he began running towards me. I screeched and began running again. Just as I got ankle deep in the salty water, almost to the rest of the group, I felt a pair of strong arms lift me from behind by my waist and throw me into the water, I could hear laughter muffled by the water surrounding me.
Once I re-emerged from the water I pushed my soaked hair out of my face and glared at Alex, who was sporting a rather devilish grin. I scooped up a bunch of the salty liquid and splashed him with it, causing him to cower away as the other began to join me in splashing Alex. "HEY!" he shouted, completely drenched, "Assholes!" he yelled over the commotion. He began reaching for me, his head still facing away to avoid the splashing, I began kicking away from him, giggling as I did so, whilst he swiped underwater for me, the best he could without looking.
Eventually he darted for me as the others began splashing each other. I laughed and screeched trying to escape as he wrapped his arms around my waist and dragged me to him. Upon feeling his arms around me, I relaxed into him as he turned me to face him; placing his hands on my face and capturing my lips in a soft kiss as he chuckled. Every once in a while another firework would explode in the sky; the bright colours reflecting across the water, the stars surrounding us, the moon right beside us.
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," Jack repeated as we all finally walked back out to shore. He grasped his genitals with his hands and began jumping frantically, sounding breathless as he spoke. I climbed onto Alex's back, trying to steal as much of his warmth as possible, as we ran back to where we had left our clothes. "Holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck," Jack continued, gasping as he pulled on his clothes.
"Oh dear Jesus, why did we do that? Why? Why?!" Zack exclaimed, shivering as he buttoned up his shirt.
"Rian, you asshole!" Jack accused, now fully dressed and rubbing at his own arms trying to gain heat from the friction.
"I... d-didn't make yo-you..." Rian stammered, his teeth practically chattering.
"I have pneumonia," Jack announced, completely deadpan, causing the rest of us to laugh at his level of certainty, "I mean it this time!" he widened his eyes as if to try and convince us.
We stood in the freezing cold, practically enveloped in a group hug, laughing as we tried to savour as much heat as we could, waiting for our cabs to show up.
Alex and I were still shivering as we quickly burst through his front door, desperate to heat up. I was laughing as I kicked off my shoes, I looked up suspiciously at a very quiet Alex; his eyes were drowning in desire as he just stared at me, his jaw locked in place. I gulped a little as he approached me, grabbing my waist as I jumped up to meet him. Spinning me around and pinning me against the door, we were in a heated flurry of kisses and articles of clothing being removed. He pulled away to take a deep, shaky breath, my wet hair falling around his face; I could barely see his face in the cloak of darkness in the room, but there was an unmistakable fire lit behind his eyes. He looked as if her were about to say something, but he just smiled and connected our swollen, pink lips again.
He moved his hand into my wet, messy hair and entangled his fingers with the strands, grabbing me tight as he moved us over to the couch, throwing me down and quickly covering my body with his own. He found one of my hands and intertwined our fingers, smiling against my lips and for the first time in my life the term 'making love' made complete sense to me; there was no other way to describe it. Our bodies seemed to meld together perfectly, both of us panting and out of breath as we tumbled over the edge in sync; curling up and falling into a deep sleep right on the couch. I had never had someone look at me or touch me in such a way – in fact, it was more like he had truly seen me and felt me; it was incredible and mind blowing, but equally terrifying and overwhelming.
"You look incredible," Alex breathed as I stepped down the stairs on Sunday night. It was New Year's Eve and we were just about to go to the beach to enjoy Alex's usual NYE plans which he'd been kind enough to invite Samuel and I along to. He had told me they'd be performing a small set and there would be fireworks and drinks; I was genuinely excited to have a nice night beneath the stars and spend the special occasion with old and new friends.
"It's just jeans and a sweater," I laughed as he held me out at arms length to examine me, his eyes wandering over my body at a snail's pace; I felt my cheeks turning a shade of red, "Stop it," I playfully slapped his shoulder and his eyes returned to mine.
"I'm sorry," he mock-defended, "you just... you're stunning," he murmured, his own cheeks reddening. He grabbed my face in his hands and pulled me into a hard, desperate kiss, like he couldn't handle not kissing me any longer. I returned the kiss with just as much force, and we probably wouldn't have stopped and just continued to get lost in the moment if we hadn't heard a car honking outside. It was Samuel, picking us up in our cab so we could get to the beach together. It was around 7 PM and the boys were set to perform at around 8 PM, so we had to hurry.
The dock was lined with fairy lights leading to this small bar set up beside the makeshift stage. Everybody was already there waiting for us by the time we arrived. Alex apologised to the boys as they hurried about trying to ensure guitars were all correctly tuned and microphones were working fine. Samuel and I joined Amelia and Cass at the bar; they were already drinking and chatting away, and so we ordered our drinks and listened as they told stories about last year and the year before; just cute little memories which I wished I had been a part of, but I was also just grateful to be here now and enjoying these brand new memories we were about to create with these great people.
"One year, Jack was so excited when it turned midnight that he jumped in the freezing sea completely clothed and for the rest of the night we had to listen to him complain that he had pneumonia – needless to say, he didn't get pneumonia," Cass told Samuel and I as Amelia flung her head back in laughter, remembering the ridiculous memory.
"Yeah, no life threatening medical conditions, just wet skinny jeans and sheer stupidity," Amelia added between laughs.
"Sheer stupidity and a sheer white shirt," Cass added, causing us all to laugh further. I loved hearing stories about the boys from the time they had been missing from my life, it made up for having not actually been there; I felt included, in a very small way.
"And that one time Zack and Alex got into a heated debate about the best Kanye West album and that girl threatened to call the police because she thought they were actually gonna fight," Amelia spoke, her eyes lighting up at the memory as she nudged Cassadee.
"Oh my god, yes!" Cass laughed, turning to Samuel and I, "they were so angry and honestly I think I would've actually called the police, like there was definitely gonna be a brawl," she explained and we all laughed.
"I still stand by my decision," Zack mumbled as he approached us, reaching around Amelia to grab a half empty bottle of beer which was perched on the fencing around the pier. We laughed as he took a swig, smirking.
"Okay, really man?!" Alex yelled from where he stood with Jack, trying to prep his equipment for their set, the look on his face pure frustration as he shot daggers in Zack's direction. I was amazed Alex had even heard him over the sounds of people chattering away and the strong, aggressive waves beneath us – and from such a distance.
Zack shook his head and rolled his eyes, before turning to face the taller man, "I know I'm right, Twisted Fantasy is one of the best albums of all time," he grumbled under his breath as he moved back over towards the guys, leaving us pulling looks of amusement at each other.
"Dude! College Dropout went triple platinum!" Alex yelled defensively, throwing his arms up in exasperation whilst Zack chuckled, having successfully irritated his friend.
"Guys!" Rian yelled over the pair, pulling them a look of disbelief at how ridiculous they were being. Zack laughed whilst Alex mumbled under his breath in an agitated tone.
"See?" Cass chuckled, referring to the scene the boys had just made over absolutely nothing. I shook my head, laughing; Alex had always been like that, super passionate about the smallest of things. He once got himself into an actual fist fight in 4th grade because some kid in his science class said Pokémon was stupid – in fact, Alex had been close to getting expelled, over something as insignificant as a cartoon.
"Alright, we're ready," Rian appeared behind Cass, planting a kiss just above her ear before jogging back over to the stage where the rest of the boys were already in position. People began gathering around as Alex introduced the band to the crowd of both familiar and unfamiliar faces, we all placed our drinks down and made our way over to get a better view of the stage.
"Uh... this first song is called Weightless," Alex stated, seeming slightly uncomfortable as he spoke, probably because he was no longer used to addressing a crowd. They began the familiar rhythm of Weightless and without realising, I was miming along with the words; taken back to a time and a place where I would bounce around and dance ridiculously as the boys played.
"Wow, they're really good," Samuel leaned over and muttered to me and he bobbed his head along with the music. I looked up at him and smiled in agreement, pleased that my best friend was appreciative of the music I had once been surrounded by, especially this song which was practically the soundtrack to my whole high school experience.
They continued to play some more of the songs I had loved back in the day; Damned if I Do Ya, Lost in Stereo, Break Your Little Heart – if All Time Low had ever decided to pursue their music career, these songs definitely would've been their biggest hits; they were fun and upbeat, but still contained the odd deep, meaningful lyric that Alex was so well-known for. Samuel and I were dancing along, shaking our hips and nodding our heads along with the music, whilst Cass and Amelia did the same, emitting a few appreciative yells on occasion. Alex would catch my eye every now and again, smiling wide as he watched me mouth along dramatically, trying his best to suppress laughter.
"Alright, this next one's gonna be a little slower," Alex spoke into the mic softly looking down, he let out an awkward laugh as he removed his guitar and replaced it for an acoustic guitar instead and adjusted his mic so that he could take a seat on a stool. The other boys left the stage, coming to join us and watch as Alex solely took the stage. Rian pulled Cass under his arm, kissing the top of her head whilst she praised him; Zack doing the same with Amelia who pecked at his mouth sweetly. Jack came over to Samuel and I, I wrapped an arm around his waist to show my support of the set they'd just performed, he smiled, hugging me back whilst leaning around me with his spare arm to high-five Samuel. We untangled as Alex began to play the instrument to a tune I'd never heard before. "This is uh... Cinderblock Garden," he was clearly still nervous, despite the amazing reception they had received from the crowd. I raised an eyebrow up at Jack to indicate my confusion, having never heard of this song before. He shrugged, with a knowing smile, nodding his head back over towards the stage, instructing me to watch.
Wait, I think we're on to something we can't run from; fate
But we can let it take us down, down this road, where all our colours run together
Let's take the worst and make it better, let's take this mess and make a home
Alex glanced up briefly to meet my eyes, but quickly averted his gaze back down to the chords he was playing. He looked incredibly nervous, his face pale and hard as he focused on his guitar strings.
I know it gets hard for you to stay, but do you really wanna throw it all away?
Another brief look up at me, his eyes soft and flooded with emotions I couldn't quite register in the brief gaze we shared before his eyes were back down.
I'm thinking that we could make forever after all,
Finding the gold in our darkest moments, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
He began swaying his head along with the rhythm he was playing; his eyes closed and a small smile forming on his lips as he eased into the performance. I looked up at Jack with a raised eyebrow and he just smiled, seemingly answering all the questions I had as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and swayed me gently with him to the melody of the song.
Tonight, take all the ghosts and all those skeletons you hide, bury them deep beneath the ground
Let them rest, cause you weren't meant to bear that burden
Look at the roses in your garden, you can breathe now and forget
My eyes stayed fixated on his, watching him intently as he sang; his voice gruff and raspy. He looked up and met my eyes and held them there, his eyes were burnt chocolate; dark and mysterious, heavy with emotions he refused to unveil. His lip twitched into a smirk as he sang the last line, his eyes darting back down to his guitar as he fell back into the chorus. I could feel the rest of the guys' eyes burning into me, but I kept my gaze firmly on Alex as he licked his lip, his leg bouncing with nerves in time with the melody.
Forget it gets hard for you to stay, but we don't really have to throw it all away
I'm thinking that we could make forever after allFinding the gold in our darkest moment, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
I had my hands in a prayer-like gesture, covering my mouth as I kept my head down, my eyes peeking upwards at him, my cheeks a shade of pink and my smile uncontainable. He glanced up and bit his bottom lip, noticing how shy I had became, his cheekbones high as he tried to suppress his own smile. I felt Jack squeeze my shoulders tighter, pulling me into him as he too realised I had became a little bashful.
Just hold out for tomorrow, our dreams will follow
Follow us back to when, when nothing was broken
The future was open, let's go back again
His voice became louder and scratchier as he sung the bridge of the song, he flung his head back a little, completely lost in the words he was singing before he brought the tone back, a lot quieter now.
I'm thinking that we could make forever after all
Finding the gold in our darkest moment, watching the roads turning into white roses, roses
And we don't ever have to leave these walls
I'll be the boy with the silver lining, you'll be the girl with the cinderblock garden
His eyes were firmly connected with mine now, his eyes a soft, melted fudge as everyone else seemed to dissipate; leaving just me and him on the seafront. He continued to Oh-ohh...oohh-ohh..., bobbing his head along, smiling wide as he sang. I kept my eyes tight on his as he kept glancing back down just to ensure he was playing the correct chords, and then back up; he shot me a quick wink – not a cheeky wink, but a comforting wink. I heard Samuel squeal a little as he reached for my hand to squeeze it, whilst Jack's arm remained firmly around me, and I could feel his eyes watching me, a grin on his face awaiting my response as Alex struck the last chord and the crowd began cheering.
My face began to ache from smiling as he stood, wiped his ripped, black, skinny jeans down, took a playful bow and made his way off stage. I didn't really think about it, I just made a bee-line for him as he stepped down from the small height of the stage – if you could call it that. I caught him off guard as our bodies collided but he instantly grabbed me and lifted me into the air; my hands finding the sides of his face and pressing my lips to his with force, my legs flicking out behind me like I was in a 90s rom-com. He held me tight by my waist and kissed me back with the same desperate need to have our lips pressed together.
"That was beautiful," I mumbled into his lips, my forehead finding his and resting there; my eyes pouring into his. I pulled back a little, a cheeky grin on my face, "that was for me, right?" I asked, jokingly, causing a deep, gruff laugh to escape the boys lips.
"Well..." he trailed off, pulling an uncomfortable face like I had caught him out, making me laugh as he enveloped my lips in another kiss. The group began cheering and clapping as we kissed, laughing into each others lips. I had presumed that Alex would've informed most of them about our situation, but I heard Amelia ask Zack 'what about Derek' in a hushed tone; Zack just shushed her and continued to whistle.
"I..." I began, my brain searching frantically for the right word, but I couldn't locate it, "...really like you," I smiled meekly, feeling sheepish as I offered him the lousy description of my emotions.
"I really like you too," he grinned at me, pecking my lips one last time before lowering me to the ground, his eyes still silently conversing with mine. I knew that the pause I had left between my statement indicated to him the words I really wanted to say, without actually saying them; I knew he was aware of how I felt, it was just too soon for me to actually get the words out.
We all sat around a little campfire on the beach, beer bottles in our hands as the flames licked at the star encrusted night sky; the moon hanging high, mirroring in the now calm waves of the ocean stretched in front of us. Amelia was sat in Zack's lap and Cass and Rian held hands, sharing the odd meaningful look – the air was filled with romance, understandable considering New Year's Eve is often associated with couples.
"You two look so cute together," Amelia gushed, her eyes were clouded with intoxication but they still gleamed with genuineness. I looked over at Alex and we both crinkled our noses and shook our heads, pretending not to be into the idea. I bit my lip smiling, as he reached out to place a hand on my thigh.
"I mean, it was kinda obvious," Cassadee laughed, nudging Rian and looking around the group for approval, all of them nodding in agreement.
"Yeah, Christmas Eve, it was so apparent," Zack chuckled, referring back to the night we had all enjoyed karaoke.
"What? What was obvious?" Alex asked, looking confused.
"The chemistry," Amelia replied, in a 'duh' tone.
I looked over at Alex, tilting my head in surprise, "What?" Alex gasped, "It was obvious?" He too looked shocked.
"Uh... yeah!" Jack laughed, crinkling the bridge of his nose like his best friend was crazy, "Soooooo obvious."
Alex frowned, turning to shake his head in my direction, "I really thought we had them all fooled." The group laughed at that; the conversation slowly fading into something else whilst Alex and I remained in that moment. I was so aware of his fingers pressed to my thigh; the skin burning beneath my jeans, as he bit down on his lower lip, his eyes seeping into mine.
The guy running the event – he had introduced himself as Dylan Something and he ran Some Bar around the corner – was suddenly yelling into one of the mics, alerting to everyone that the countdown was about to begin. We all got to our feet and began counting down 10... 9... 8.... I looked at Alex sceptically, unaware of what to do in this situation; do we kiss and enter the new year together or do we not? I was a person who heavily believed in superstitious stuff like kisses at new year and what they mean, and under any other circumstances I probably wouldn't feel comfortable kissing someone I had been getting to know – well, getting to know again – for only a couple of weeks, but looking up into Alex's deep brown, inviting orbits, I felt a sudden compulsion to just do it; to take the risk and go for it.
7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1. Immediately, the sound of fireworks crashed around us, so loud it was almost deafening, as Alex leaned down and grabbed my face between his palms, bending at the knee to place a gentle kiss on my lips. I heard the others share their kisses; as well as the laughter that ensued after Jack pulled Samuel into a playful peck, in attempts for the pair to not be left out, but all I could focus on was kissing Alex. My hands encircled his neck and he moved a hand to my waist to pull me into him as I deepened the kiss a little; just enough to taste him, as I had been craving to do so all night.
"Alright, alright," Rian breathed, patting Alex's back, "that's enough kids," he chuckled, as we slowly peeled ourselves from one another; our eyes still locked intensely. "I'm goin' in, who's joining me?" Rian chirped as he began bunching his pants around his ankles; this caught mine and Alex's attention.
"Babeeeee!" Cass shrieked, a wide smile on her face as she watched her partner undress. None of us were drunk enough to blame alcohol for our stupid decisions, this was all on Rian.
"What?" he laughed, "I'm getting naked, not pulling a Jack on you guys," he referred to the story Cass had informed us of earlier; Jack diving into the ocean fully clothed and having to remain in his soaking attire for the remainder of the night.
"Okay, screw you, Dawson," Jack chirped as he pulled his own shirt over his head, earning a clap from Rian.
"Okay, I'm in!" Samuel announced and we all laughed at his eagerness to remove his own clothing. Rian was now fully nude and holding his manhood, jumping from foot to foot and shivering from the cold wind.
"Of course you're in!" I laughed, shaking my head at my best friend who was always keen to do anything a little raunchy – especially if it involved other naked men.
"Don't be a prude!" Samuel giggled, nudging me. I laughed as both Cass and Amelia began to undress too; Amelia pulling at Zack's arm, trying to persuade him to join too, until eventually he let out a heavy sigh and began undressing.
"You chicken, Gaskarth?" Jack challenged, now fully nude himself and grabbing his area protectively.
"Fuck no," Alex responded defensively as he began removing his shoes.
"You too?" I questioned, my eyes filled with both shock and excitement as I watched the group plan to participate in indecent exposure. Alex grinned up at me as he began unbuckling his pants.
"Come on, frigid," Samuel joked, removing my jacket for me. I slapped his hand away jokingly, but watching the others sent adrenaline coursing through my veins and I began to undress myself.
"Race you guys!" Jack called out as he ran off into the dark, his skinny butt jiggling as he moved. Rian took off after him, pulling Cass by the hand, whilst Samuel pulled me a face before running off himself. Amelia climbed onto Zack's naked back and hit his chest like she were whipping a horse.
Alex was now fully undressed, one hand barely covering his area whilst he motioned for me to grab his other as I removed my underwear. He had been continuously opening and clasping his hand towards me, begging me to grab him whilst watching the others laughing, but when he turned to face me; failing to cover my breasts, all of the excitement drained from his eyes and was replaced with a different kind of excitement. "Oh my god..." he breathed, stepping towards me, his hands finding my waist as he looked down at me seductively; his eyes devouring me.
"GUYS!" we heard Jack screaming over the sounds of waves and splashing, "HURRY UP, LAST ONE IN'S A ROTTEN EGG!" his voice childlike and filled with laughter.
The pair of us laughed at Jack's immature insult; Alex's eyes spilling into mine as he closed the gap between us and kissed me passionately, my breath hitching in my throat at the sheer intensity of the lust in his eyes and the neediness of his lips on mine. "I guess I'm a rotten egg, then," he mumbled into my mouth, a small smile forming on his lips as his tongue flicked against my bottom lip.
"Yeah..." I murmured, seeming disengaged, "I guess you are," I suddenly perked up, untangling him from me and darting around him to bolt to the ocean where I could hear everyone laughing and splashing each other. I slowed a little to turn and look at Alex, who was stood smirking, shaking his head at my deception. I laughed and stuck my tongue out at him teasingly, watching as he began running towards me. I screeched and began running again. Just as I got ankle deep in the salty water, almost to the rest of the group, I felt a pair of strong arms lift me from behind by my waist and throw me into the water, I could hear laughter muffled by the water surrounding me.
Once I re-emerged from the water I pushed my soaked hair out of my face and glared at Alex, who was sporting a rather devilish grin. I scooped up a bunch of the salty liquid and splashed him with it, causing him to cower away as the other began to join me in splashing Alex. "HEY!" he shouted, completely drenched, "Assholes!" he yelled over the commotion. He began reaching for me, his head still facing away to avoid the splashing, I began kicking away from him, giggling as I did so, whilst he swiped underwater for me, the best he could without looking.
Eventually he darted for me as the others began splashing each other. I laughed and screeched trying to escape as he wrapped his arms around my waist and dragged me to him. Upon feeling his arms around me, I relaxed into him as he turned me to face him; placing his hands on my face and capturing my lips in a soft kiss as he chuckled. Every once in a while another firework would explode in the sky; the bright colours reflecting across the water, the stars surrounding us, the moon right beside us.
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," Jack repeated as we all finally walked back out to shore. He grasped his genitals with his hands and began jumping frantically, sounding breathless as he spoke. I climbed onto Alex's back, trying to steal as much of his warmth as possible, as we ran back to where we had left our clothes. "Holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck," Jack continued, gasping as he pulled on his clothes.
"Oh dear Jesus, why did we do that? Why? Why?!" Zack exclaimed, shivering as he buttoned up his shirt.
"Rian, you asshole!" Jack accused, now fully dressed and rubbing at his own arms trying to gain heat from the friction.
"I... d-didn't make yo-you..." Rian stammered, his teeth practically chattering.
"I have pneumonia," Jack announced, completely deadpan, causing the rest of us to laugh at his level of certainty, "I mean it this time!" he widened his eyes as if to try and convince us.
We stood in the freezing cold, practically enveloped in a group hug, laughing as we tried to savour as much heat as we could, waiting for our cabs to show up.
Alex and I were still shivering as we quickly burst through his front door, desperate to heat up. I was laughing as I kicked off my shoes, I looked up suspiciously at a very quiet Alex; his eyes were drowning in desire as he just stared at me, his jaw locked in place. I gulped a little as he approached me, grabbing my waist as I jumped up to meet him. Spinning me around and pinning me against the door, we were in a heated flurry of kisses and articles of clothing being removed. He pulled away to take a deep, shaky breath, my wet hair falling around his face; I could barely see his face in the cloak of darkness in the room, but there was an unmistakable fire lit behind his eyes. He looked as if her were about to say something, but he just smiled and connected our swollen, pink lips again.
He moved his hand into my wet, messy hair and entangled his fingers with the strands, grabbing me tight as he moved us over to the couch, throwing me down and quickly covering my body with his own. He found one of my hands and intertwined our fingers, smiling against my lips and for the first time in my life the term 'making love' made complete sense to me; there was no other way to describe it. Our bodies seemed to meld together perfectly, both of us panting and out of breath as we tumbled over the edge in sync; curling up and falling into a deep sleep right on the couch. I had never had someone look at me or touch me in such a way – in fact, it was more like he had truly seen me and felt me; it was incredible and mind blowing, but equally terrifying and overwhelming.
Okay! I'm finally all caught up and now I'm sad because there's no more to read. PLEASEEEE update more soon!
9/17/16