I must've been high enough on that morphine to ever think I was getting any sleep that night. In total, if my counting is decent enough, I got in or around 4 hour's kip post-labour. Charlotte didn't stop crying for a second. Like, don't get me wrong, I expected a few little cries here and there, but sweet, divine Jesus was I wrong. That child, let me tell you, has the loudest, most ear-drum piercing cry I've heard in my life. I'm honestly surprised my glasses didn't shatter.

But, of course, she played the sweet little angel through the late morning. Aye, apparently while I went for another shower (felt so nice to wear my own clothes again, even if it was just sweatpants and a tshirt), she slept like a lamb (is that a saying, or did my Year 1 teacher lie to me?) in her little crib while Josh kept an eye on her. I couldn't believe it, like. I'd been played by my own daughter who wasn't even a day old. Do I expect more of this? Christ.

---

After my shower and when I'd gotten changed, I had to make a bit of an effort (though I didn't feel like it, for once) and lazily fuck up on applying makeup, as it was visiting hours from 11am and I didn't want to look like I'd been on the drink for 3 days, though I wish I had been (I think there's something not right wrong there). I had to look decent enough, lest I want to scare off my family and friends.

Mum was first to arrive with Dan, and my god, that woman was so sugary sweet, and that was a side I'd never seen before. I mean, don't get me wrong, my mum's the loveliest lady to exist, but blimey. Dan, on the other hand, looked a bit on the dead side of life. Must've stayed here the whole night, I don't know. I didn't keep tabs on him.

"How you feeling, pet? Bet you're shattered." Mum gave me a kiss on the forehead as Josh offered her his seat.

"Absolutely wrecked. My back's in such a bad way, and they have me wearing a nappy, Mum. Like how old do they think I am? Might ask me do I want to be bottle-fed aswell, next." I rolled my eyes and settled back into my bed, lifting Charlotte from her crib and placing her onto my chest. As I did this, Dan lost the look of death from his face. Knew it.

"I'd say it's sore, I mean, you did just give birth. Oh, and they gave you that to catch any bleeding after. I'd to wear them after I had you lot. It's standard." Her eyes also lit up at the sight of the baby. I never realised how mushy my family were.

"Tried telling her that it was normal, but of course, it was like talking to a brick wall." Josh piped up, never missing an opportunity to take a jab at me for banter.

"I also tried telling you not to wear your favourite fucking tshirt and to not take off half your scrubs, but of course, it was like talking to a brick wall." I shot back at him, narrowing my eyes while also trying to calm the baby down as she stirred. It was true, just as I'd literally gone pop, genius took off the top half of his scrubs thinking it was all over, and got all my vaginal blood all over his nice blink-182 tshirt when he was supposed to cut the chord. Never let him forget it.

"Alright, easy, Rachel. Might pop a blood vessel. Oh, I meant to ask, what name did you finally settle on for the baby?" Mum asked, and I realised I never told her. Blaming that on my pregnancy brain. Got so bad that I forgot how to shower.

"Charlotte, and her middle name's Rachel. Josh chose it, not me. If we have another child in the distant future, I get to choose. Doesn't bother me, though, I couldn't think of a pretty name for the life of me." That's true. Pure shit with thinking of names. I called our last dog Miffy because I was miffed with Josh for getting a dog in the first place. She was an old enough dog, mind, and we only had her for a year before she passed. Lovely little thing, she turned out to be. I grew very attached to her and it killed me when she died.

"Aww, that's lovely, pet. I'm assuming the last name is Franceschi then, hmm?"

"It's alright. We were gonna do the whole double-barrel thing, but it would've been too much of a mouthful for the poor mite to say when she got older, so we left it with just my last name. It was a mutual decision, though, please don't hate me." Josh looked genuinely scared. Bless.

"Needn't worry, son. I would've done the same. It's a lovely name, though, suits her. Image of you, mind. Can see little curls already." Mum took little Lottie from me and held her with such confidence, obviously as she's been in this situation before, as opposed to me who was a shaky mess.

"Lucky, then, isn't she? Wouldn't want the poor child being my twin. I'm bad enough as it is, sure look, the bags under my eyes are designer." I thought I was being clever.

"Shut up, Rach. Least you've a reason to look like you've been on the drinking session for a week." Dan also thought he was being clever, and I also forgot he was standing there since he was still quiet.

"Please, it hurts me to even move, but I'd still be able to knock you out."

"Alright, sis, whatever helps you sleep at night." Earplugs, I thought. "Chosen the godparents yet?"

"How disorganised do you think I am?" I scoffed. "Of course I did. Clearly it's yourself since you're my brother and I'd no choice, and then Liss, because she's such a sweet soul." Liss' Josh's sister Elissa. She's so sweet like she's away, but texted me daily to see how things were.

"Wow, am I really?" He seemed genuinely surprised.

"Yeah...don't tell me you didn't see that coming?"

"Well, I wasn't the most..understanding of people when you told me, so I thought I'd lost out on that honour. Thanks, though, it means a lot."

"No, no, you didn't. Lottie's not being christened since neither myself or Josh are overly religious, but it'll be on her birth certificate or whatever." Dan nodded to this and still seemed to be reeling from the news.

"As much as I'd like to stay much longer, I've a doctor's appointment to head to, so I'll have to leave. Oh, before I forget-." Mum handed Lottie back to me as she (the baby, not Mum) started to cry a little (it was about half eleven, so she was due a feed). She (Mum, not the baby) then handed me a little pink bag full of baby all-in-ones and a little pink bear, and I looked at her in surprise.

"Mum-." I began, but she cut me off.

"Don't start me. Charlotte's my grandchild, obviously I'd get her a little something. Say nothing, I did this on my own accord." She said, and I frowned at her.

"There was no need." I continued to frown, but dropped my voice to a whisper.

"Love you too, pet. I'll pop in to see you later again if I can, alright? Take care." She kissed my forehead again and headed out, while Dan stayed behind a minute.

"I'll be back later, Jen wants to see you." He waved and went to catch up to Mum, leaving us in silence. I gave Josh a glare to tell him to stay quiet as I put Charlotte back in her crib beside my bed. I needed the peace.

---

We didn't have any visitors apart from Matt until Jen popped up, so while she was here, Josh went home to shower and grab me more of whatever I needed, and get himself a decent sleep. He desperately needed it, as he was awake more than I was, surprisingly.

"How're you holding up?" Jen asked, taking a sip of her tea she brought in with her (absolute babe brought me one too).

"I'm exhausted, to be honest. But, that's something I'll become immune to, as Lord knows I'll get less and less sleep with this little one. I don't mind too much though, as I love being a mum so far." I said, shifting in my bed, trying to find a comfy position. I don't think it was possible.

"Awh yeah, I'd bet. It seems lovely in a sense, and the "Mum" title's quite cute and suits you. How's Josh taking it?"

"He's doing okay from what I can see. Like, I'm breastfeeding for two months so clearly he can't do the feeds, but he's changing her nappy and rallying around after me, and he doesn't seem phased at all by it. I don't know if he knows that I know this, but earlier as he walked out with Matt, I heard him kinda gush, saying "mate, I can't believe I'm a dad, like. It's such a surreal feeling, and I love it", which was sweet. I hope he's still in that frame of mind in two weeks, though.."

"Nah, you're right. He seemed more hyper than usual earlier, so I figured. You've both taken it surprisingly well, though, considering you're both so young. You're so calm, like, fairs to you."

"Needn't be fooled, Jen. Inside, I'm dying for a bottle of Smirnoff. But I love this little thing, she's one of, if not the best thing to happen to me. Makes me so emotional, much more so than listening to The Only Exception by Paramore." That said something, as The Only Exception's mine and Josh's song since we're sappy like that.

"Bless you. You've been on the go all day, though, want me to keep an eye on the baby while you sleep? I don't mind." I had to think for a second.

"I wouldn't want to put pressure on you.." That wasn't fair.

"I'm twenty years old: I'm an adult, and I'm good with kids. Sleep. I mean it."

"Jen.."

"Rachel. Sleep. You need it." She sounded like my mum. I took the offer, however, and dozed off momentarily, but I don't think it was for too long. Least I hope not, anyways.

Notes

Sorry, kiddies, I've been on vacation. Flagstaff is so nice btw, I enjoyed my time there (surprise vacation).

Updating from my unused ~back-up~, as I'm on my iPad and not my phone (my iPad won't connect to my tumblr for some reason).

comment/vote/subscribe pls n thnx