What Can I Say

Shay had been distant after school, and during school. She insisted on walking home no matter how much I protested. It was cold and looked like it was going to pour down raining any moment. Still I was forced to watch her walk away, ignoring every word I said, pushing me away when I approached her. She never made sense to me but still I loved her. Yes, I did love her, ever since I had met her. Why wouldn't I? She had a kind heart, a warm soul. She had a beautiful mind that was unable to be understood.

"Where's Shay going," Jack asks.

"Home, she says she wants to be alone and she wants to walk. You know her, she had made up her mind. There was no changing it," I responded, turning to him.

"We still got practice though right?"

"Duh, idiot!"

He laughed as we climbed into my car. As we began to pull out of the school parking lot the sky opened up. It started pouring and all I could think about was my love. Was she warm enough? Was she safe? Why had I let her go alone? I was an idiot, if she got sick or something happened to her I would never be able to live with myself. I felt myself start to shake.

"Lex, you good," Jack asked.

I pulled over and got out. He sighed and helped me into the passenger seat. He helped me calm down the best he could after he climbed into the driver's seat. I smiled at him as he rolled his eyes. He had no idea what was going through my mind, I would never tell him. When we got to my house we saw that Zack was already here, he drove his car today becaue of the chance of rain. I figured he was already inside, it wasn't that uncommon anymore.

We walked in and were greeted by Zack and my mom who were both sitting at the kitchen table, a plate full of pizza rolls in the center of the table. Jack ran over before I even realized what happened, that boy loved those things way too much.

"Where Ri," Zack asked.

"He's out with that chick. What's her name again? He's driving her home then coming here. They're sickeningly cute," I responded.

"Not as much as you and Shay," Jack said around a mouthful of food.

"Shut your mouth you dumb twat," I yelled.

"ALEXANDER," my mother scolded.

The room was silent after that. Well mostly silent, both Jack and Zack were giggling. I looked at the floor, my cheeks tinted a soft pink. I had forgotten my mother was in the room when I yelled that. I just hated how Jack would just talk without thinking, hey someone might not want this shared with the entire planet.

"Wait, you and Shay," Zack asked.

"Yeah," I muttered.

"Bout damn time."

I threw one of the towels at him and we all went downstairs, waiting once again for our drummer. I felt my phone vibrate and I saw it was a text from Shay. All it said was she was home. No cute smiley face or heart just the single word home. I couldn't help but feel saddened by this. I know love wasn't her thing and neither was the cutesy relationship but I swear that I will make her feel loved if it's the last thing I do. I want her to feel about me how I feel about her.

Even if we didn't last I swear that I will show her how beautiful she is and how deserving of love she is. I swear that I will prove to her that all of my work was worth it. I swear that she will never feel alone again. I love her and I am willing to do everything in my power to prove my love to her.

Notes

I'm just writing because I don't know what else to do cause it's a little too cold to go stare at the stars. I hope you like this update, it's just a filler chapter. Somethings going down in the next chapter so just a warning >:)

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Title credit: Swing Life Away - Rise Against