Jack

I had just brought Alex home from the hospital, after about an hour of him sobbing into my shoulder. We were currently cuddling together on my bed, since Matty said I could have the rest of the day off. I didn’t know what to do right now. I can’t help but feel like this is somewhat my fault. Maybe I am a bad influence on Alex? I feel like I am. I should have just left him and Brendon alone, they would be happy together.

Alex was still sobbing, like he has been for the past two hours. I have been trying my best to calm him down, it’s not good for little Mel. His Mom came to my house, after hearing about Brendon, and tried to talk to Alex. All he did was yell and scream at her to leave and never talk to him again, which I know he didn’t really mean. Even if his Mother did do something pretty fucked up, he still loves her, and can’t go on without her.

“Let go of me.” Alex randomly said and broke from my embrace. It hurt a bit, but I understand he is feeling worse than I am right now. He sat up and got off the bed. He started to walk to my bedroom door.

“Lex? Where are you going?” I asked quietly as I sat up.

“Don’t fucking talk to me.” He shot at me and left the room. I looked down at the ground, trying to understand what just happened. He was sobbing into my chest, pulling me closer and closer to him and holding on for his life. Then he just gets up and leaves, without another word. Hormones maybe? I mean, he is pregnant, so that is the most logical answer to why he would be so mean to me, when I haven’t done anything to him. Well, nothing to him recently.

I was sitting on my bed, watching my door just waiting for Alex to walk back in. I decided to give him a little space, knowing it would be for the better. That was, until I heard the sound of breaking glass. I jumped up from my bed and ran down the stairs at thunder speed. I didn’t see Alex in the living room, so I ran to the kitchen. That’s where I saw Alex sweeping up what looks to be like a broken glass cup. Glad I still had my shoes on, and rushed over to him. I took the broom from him and let it fall to the ground as I grabbed at his hands and looked over them for cuts. He yanked his hand back from me and glared at me.

“What?” I asked softly.

“If you want to fucking clean it up. Then fucking do it. Leave me the fuck alone.” He spat at me, then walked away, going into the living room. I felt a tear trail down my cheek, even with his pregnancy, he has never been this rude to me. Something else is going on in his mind, and it can’t be good. By the way he is acting, I can tell that it is about me. I sighed and picked up the broom, sweeping up the broken glass and putting it in the trash can.

Once I was finished putting the broom back where it belonged, I heard the sound of the front door open, and slam shut. Alex. I ran to the living room and opened up the door, seeing Alex walking down the driveway. I ran up behind him and stopped him.

“Where are you going?” My voice keeping it’s soft tone, afraid if I raise it he might break down again. He rolled his eyes and spoke.

“Anywhere the fuck I wanna go! You don’t fucking own me, therefore you can’t keep me here! Leave me the fuck alone!” He shouted and stormed off. I turned around and watched him continue to stomp away, as I felt more tears trail down my face. Just because I act like I’m big and tough, and can do anything I damn well please. Alex gets to the sides of me most people don’t. He can make me cry with just a few words. Should I go after him? I should. I don’t want him and Melody to get hurt. But if I do, he will just get even more angry with me, and all that will do is make is worse. So I did what I do best, and walked away and back into my house.

Once I shut the front door, I made sure to keep it unlocked. I let the tears tail down as they pleased and walked up to my bedroom. I went into my bathroom and turned on the bath, stripping of my clothes and getting in. I sat down in the tub and brought my knees up to my chest. Why is this getting to me so much? He’s in pain, and he needs someone to take it out on. I understand to the fullest, I’m the same way. But, I would never take it out on Alex. Never in my life. I thought about everything, and continued to sob. I looked to my side and saw my new shaving razor I bought. I threw the other one away. I grabbed it and broke it, taking the blade out and holding it between my two fingers.

“Hello, old friend.” I whispered.

Notes

Well, that happened.

~Jagk.