Daddy

By eleven o’clock, Alex was sitting up on his end of the couch with the blanket draped around his shoulders. Sebastian was clutched to his chest, as he’d been since the moment Jordan had walked through the front door (and probably even earlier than that), and a lot of the color had returned to his cheeks. They’d been silent ever since Jack had left them alone, and while it had started out as being uncomfortable, it had morphed into being… not much, really. They weren’t comfortable around each other, that was for sure, but they didn’t mind the company. Sort of.

It was so quiet between them that Jordan almost jumped out of his skin when suddenly there was a gentle hand curling over the top of his leg and shaking gently. He glanced over to see that Alex had moved closer and was now sitting on his knees, facing him. The dog was still in his hand, cradled against his bare chest, and his teeth were nibbling gently at his bottom lip as he moved his hand back and forth again.

“Yeah?” Jordan finally croaked, voice not used to being used, when he realized that Alex was waiting for permission to speak.

The elder cleared his throat and moved away again. With that, his eyes and both hands fell to the dog. The soft fur was twirled between clumsy fingers as Alex attempted to stutter out what he wanted to say. Sometimes he got shy or a little more childish than usual, especially when his daddy wasn’t around. He really couldn’t help it.

“I, just… um… daddy said that, um… that I should tell you if I get hungry, and you’ll… you’ll make me food?” he said. It almost sounded like a question, and Jordan wasn’t sure how to answer at first. He settled with a nod of the head when eye contact was reestablished. “Well, can you make me some, uh… toast? Or… or some lunch? I-I know it’s kinda early, but daddy doesn’t have to know.”

Jordan had to be discreet in pinching himself to keep from cringing at the use of the word ‘daddy.’ He told Zack he would be understanding, damn it.

“Yeah, I can do that,” he finally answered after Alex shrunk a little further away under his unwavering gaze. “Jack—uh, your daddy said that there was some mac and cheese somewhere, if you want me to make that. That might help you feel a little better. My mom used to give it to me when I was sick.”

Alex nodded. His gaze had diverted back to Sebastian, and he worked on smoothing out the fur that he’d twiddled into a mess as Jordan climbed to his feet.

“Why don’t you, uh… come with me? You can help, if you want. Or we could talk about something. Like, uh… what’s your doggy’s name?”

At that, Alex perked up immediately. Sebastian was one of his favorite things to talk about. Jordan smiled like he’d hit the jackpot because, hey, at least now they were actually getting somewhere, right? It only took three hours.

“His name is Sebastian,” Alex answered as he, too, climbed to his feet and began to follow behind the younger. “Daddy got him for me a long time ago, for our first Valentine’s Day. He’s the first stuffed animal daddy ever bought me. He’s my favorite.”

“Yeah?” Jordan asked as he nodded along. This was just like babysitting a sick child… except, probably easier. Maybe he’d make a business out of it. “Why’d you name him Sebastian?”

“Dunno,” Alex answered honestly. “I was watching The Little Mermaid when daddy gave him to me. Maybe that’s why. I dunno.”

“That’s cool,” the younger said as he reached the kitchen. He immediately headed for the first door he saw. Jack had said something about a pantry, hadn’t he? He must’ve. Where else would people keep food that didn’t belong in the refrigerator or the freezer? “I like The Little Mermaid. I met her once, y’know.”

The gasp of jealousy and surprise that Alex let out at that probably could’ve been heard from down the block. That time, Jordan did jump, resulting in the box of macaroni and cheese he’d just grabbed to be dropped to the floor.

“How did you meet her? Is she pretty? Is she nice? Is she smart?” Alex inquired. He’d seated himself at a barstool and was leaning forward with his elbows on the counter and Sebastian propped up beside him. His eyes were wide, and his jaw was slightly slack. He’d never met a princess before, especially not his favorite one. How was he supposed to handle such news?

The younger man rolled his eyes (playfully, he hoped) before he turned back to pick up the box so that he could actually start cooking. “Of course she is. When I was really little, my mom and dad took me to Disney World, and she was there. You can’t tell anyone this, but I asked her to marry me, and she said yes. Our secret, yeah? If Zack finds out, he might get jealous. Who knows what Prince Eric would do to me?”

There was a quiet giggle at that, and Alex’s eyes glinted gleefully. He liked this; liked that Jordan liked him enough to tell him secrets.

They talked about all sorts of things after that as Jordan actually set about making their lunch—other Disney princesses, Alex’s other stuffed animals, how Alex was feeling, if there was any special way he liked to eat his mac n’ cheese or if it could just be piled into a bowl. The fifteen minutes that it took to prepare the meal passed by in what felt like the blink of an eye.

It was as Alex was getting through explaining why Garnet and Amethyst are his favorite crystal gems (“because Garnet is kinda like daddy, and Amethyst is kinda like me, y’know?” even though, no, Jordan really didn’t know… at all) when the younger’s cellphone rang.

“Hello?” he said into the device. His eyes watched Alex stab the noodles in his bowl with the edge of his fork as he awaited an answer.

“Hey, how’s everything going? Is Alex feeling better? I tried to call his phone but no one was picking up,” Jack rushed out. He sounded pretty damn stressed, truthfully. Knowing him, he probably was still overly-worried about his boyfriend.

“Yeah, he’s fine now. You wanna talk to him?”

Jack couldn’t even get out an answer before the phone was being held across the counter for the older man to take.

“Hello?”

“Hi, baby boy. How’re you feeling? Jordan says you’re all better now?” Jack inquired. “Have you eaten anything yet?”

“Yeah, we’re havin’ macaroni now,” the blond answered as he twirled his fork between his fingers mindlessly. “Jordan’s a good cook. I think he’s better than you, daddy.”

The younger man couldn’t hear what was being said on the other end of the line from where he was sat, but he figured that Jack had pretended to be mad—if the giggle Alex let out was anything to go by, at least.

“Yeah,” Alex started again as he went back to stabbing at his noodles. “I think I wanna color after. If I color you a picture, will you hang it up at work?” He bit his lip and blushed at the response. “I don’t know… maybe a dinosaur or a princess or—” and there was the gasp. “Did you know Jordan met Ariel? He said she’s pretty and smart and nice… yeah… I wanna meet her one day, too… yeah… yeah, I know… okay… I love you, too, daddy.”

The phone was moved away and the red ‘end call’ icon was clicked before it was handed over to its owner without another word. Neither said anything for a few moments before the curiosity finally got the best of him.

“So… Zack tried to explain it to me last time we were all together, but… I don’t know… can you just… why do you, y’know… call him ‘daddy?’ Is there a reason, or is it just something that you, like… y’know?”

Alex seemed to freeze at that. It wasn’t that he was unwilling to explain it all again, it was just… he thought that maybe Jordan didn’t care about it or something. He’d referred to Jack as Alex’s daddy a couple times, hadn’t he?

He pushed his macaroni around for a few minutes before he lifted a small forkful into his mouth. He just… he needed a second to think. That was all. Jordan didn’t make a move or say anything. He was a little worried he’d gone too far and said the wrong thing. Then, Alex was clearing his throat.

“Well… I don’t know what Zack told you, but it’s… I like being Jack’s baby boy, and I like calling Jack daddy, because it’s… it’s ownership, y’know? Jack’s my daddy, and I’m his baby boy. He takes care of me, and protects me, and loves me. It’s so much more than just a title. As my daddy, he has responsibilities. As his baby boy, I have my own responsibilities. We both try to make each other feel as happy as possible. It’s not like a slave thing, either. It’s just… he’s a dom, and I’m a sub, but there’s more to it than most other relationships,” Alex explained. His words were slow and calculated, since he didn’t want to have to talk about it anymore than he already had to.

Jordan nodded along to what he was being told, but stopped when the speech came to an end as well. He had another thought, then. One that he probably shouldn’t have asked, but he—“So what does your father think about all of this? Does he know?”

Alex seemed to flush a dark pink before he shook his head. He refused to make eye contact, just like he had earlier in the day. “My parents don’t know. I don’t want them to. I don’t… I don’t want them shunning me for it like everyone else does. I can handle it from other people, but I don’t think I could if it was them. I don’t see them very often as it is, but when I do, I only call Jack by his name. I have to do that sometimes even when I don’t see them as it is. It’s kinda funny to watch Jack almost slip up, though. I almost do sometimes, too, but we always catch ourselves in time.”

There was a small smile that spread across the elder’s cheeks as he thought about all of the times they’d almost gotten themselves caught, and that had Jordan smiling in turn. Honestly, he was pretty damn satisfied with the answer he’d been given. It was probably the most ‘adult’ thing he’d heard Alex say since… since he’d told Jack about his lifestyle.

Their meal was finished in silence, and Jordan offered to clean everything up after they’d finished. So that Alex could have enough time to finish his colorings before Jack got home, he’d said. Alex had accepted that without a second thought, but really, Jordan just felt… kinda shitty, truthfully.

Sure, Alex wasn’t being shunned by his parents or anything yet, but it they were to ever find out about any of what Alex and Jack do together… and they’ve both already come so close to slipping up… he couldn’t imagine not being fully accepted by his parents.

Thankfully, it was something he didn’t need to worry about. What he did need to worry about was making sure that the house was clean and Alex was both happy and healthy. Just a few more hours, and then he could go home and tell Zack about everything that he’d learned. It was a lot more than he’d expected to, honestly.

In the living room, Alex had made himself comfortable on the floor between the front of the couch and the coffee table. Steven Universe was still playing on the TV, Sebastian was settled snugly in his lap, and crayons were scattered about as the blond set about finding the perfect pictures to color for his daddy.

Maybe he’d even make one for Jordan, too.

Notes