October- Senior Year
I was home, and had been sitting in the kitchen for two hours with the envelope that determined my future sitting in front of me. "That was kick ass man." Alex's voice echoed through the passage, along with some more familiar tones. The four boys entered the kitchen, looking at me and muttering some hellos but when I didn't respond, Alex definitely knew something was wrong.
"Dev? Hey, what's up?" he said, sitting next to me, pulling up a chair. I said nothing and just motioned to the post. "You haven't opened it?! Dee, you have been waiting for this for weeks, just open it." he exclaimed, bringing the attention of the other boys back.
It was Jack who broke the silence, "What is going on?!"
"Her acceptance letter from NYU." Alex replying for me, knowing I still wouldn't speak. I ran outside, away from my friends and the letter that determined my future. Once I reached the base of the familiarly large tree, I climbed up into my old tree house and although it might be childish I found myself coming here for some silence away from the boys.
"Devon!" I heard Alex calling out, looking for me. Minutes passed and I felt his presence sink down next to me, giving me slight peace of mind. "What's wrong sis?" His voice drenched with concern as his arm came around mine.
"What if I didn't get in! Ive been staring at it since I got home, it doesn't get any less scary." I sobbed, my heart was racing a million miles an hour and I was having trouble breathing.
"Bitch please, if they didn't except you they are crazy, and Jack and I have some major ass-kicking to do. Devon, look at me. You are first in the class, with high marks and plenty of other shit I'm sure. Not to mentioned that their soccer coach came and scouted you! Listen to me now, as your brother you have no choice, you are going to come back inside, open the damn letter, and cry a bunch of happy little tears, you know why?" he was talking so fast the world was spinning as he wiped the tears from my cheeks. "Because Devon there was no way that you didn't get in." And with that my heart slowed and seemed to take a sigh of relief. He was my better half, my twin, my best friend, and he knew exactly how I worked and how to calm me down more times than not.
I stood up, wiped the tears from my face and nodded at him, because well, I didn't talk much when I was scared or stressed, but when I did it was dangerous. "That's my girl." he said triumphantly, slinging an arm around my shoulders.
We walked back into Jack trying to catch grapes being thrown at his face, making us both laugh. "You always were good at playing with things in your mouth." I added.
"And she is back!" Rian yelled. Alex gave me a reassuring shove, and I sighed sitting down looking at the letter. I opened it, I had gotten in, and the scene was exactly like in Perks of Being a Wallflower, when Sam gets into Penn State, except with more boys, and a lot of enthusiastic swearing. Not to mention Alex secretly opened a $500 bottle of champagne of my mothers wine, hoping she wouldn't notice it was missing.
I was smiling like an idiot for the rest of the night. I was surrounded by friends and family, and for once in a long time I was genuinely happy. I looked around our basement at the boys, laughing and drinking our hidden beer stash. Life was infinite.
~*~
They were practically my family and they weren't even Alex's first real friends when we moved here from Essex. It was a big move and as twins it simply brought Alex and I closer together, for a little while. We both left friends and had to make new ones. Yes we were seven years old but things seemed really hard then.
I was not so good at making friends after the move, so I stuck to myself, taught myself how to play piano and guitar once middle school rolled around. Unlike Alex who immediately slid into the popular crowd, and seemed to forget about me. My mum however, if she wasn't working she would sit with me and gossip about all the women at her work, and it was quite entertaining. Soon enough she realized that I was happy here which was her biggest concern, then she stopped hanging out with me as much because I kinda turned into a moody teen.
But then my brother Tom died, for lack of a more depressing explanation, que the flight back to England, the flight back to my home. It sucked as any death of a family member usually does, Tom was my half brother and he didn't treat us like we were any thing less than full siblings, he was probably the best brother I could ask for growing up. He took me out and joked that if any guy took me on a date crappier than our dates were he would kick their ass.
Once we landed in London, of course I had contacted old friends, the reunion was amazing, one of my closest friends that I had kept in touch with for all 8 years, Wendy, had thrown me a huge party. Naturally this upset Alex even more, because he was too busy with his new friends to keep in contact with the old ones; So when I had a place to go and he didn't he just got more pissed at me.
The plane ride was equally exhausting, and I had to sit next to Alex. Every time I tried to talk to him he was pissy and dismissive. Slowly he broke me, the one person that I thought couldn't, but he did it anyway. The funeral was sad, as funerals usually are, but Tom was always a happy person, he always had candy in his pockets when we were little and always had a smile on his face. So when I saw him there, still and sad, it really hurt me. On the plane here, mum had told us that we could put something in his casket, and for old time's sake, I had brought a small piece of candy and slipped it into his pocket and then looked at my mum, who saw this and smiled but in turn only made her cry harder. During the end of funeral, a hand snaked into mine, and I turned to see Alex in tears, which brought on my own waterworks. "I'm so sorry." were the first real words he has said to me in years.
Once were back in the states and summer was over, Alex had no one. Most of his popular friends seemed to forget about him, but I was there to catch him. I introduced him to my few friends, Lisa my biology partner, and Rian a popular-ish guy, who was a year older than I, who turned up in a lot of my classes and was the first one to notice that I had been gone for two weeks during the summer even without us being in school. Rian had turned into my brother more than Alex had been these last couple years, but stayed my best friend just the same. Alex and his charms, had us hanging out with my friends, and their friends. With Alex by my side, my friend circle had multiplied. Lisa and my friend Cassadee introduced us to this stud with the cutest curls, Zack, although he went to our rival school, he seemed pretty sweet. Rian introduced us to a familiar face named Jack Barakat who was known as the school's hooligan, who instantly clicked with Alex and Jack soon became yet another younger brother to me, and within the year the boys started the band. Although I hate to admit it because I am his sister, they were really good, even if they were just covering old songs.

~*~

Summer- Post-Graduation
"Hurry up dude, the car is already packed." I complained. I had been sitting on Alex's bed with the boys playing Halo, who had come over to say goodbye around noon, yet Alex still wasn't ready. I gave him three weeks to pack, one would think he would be ready.
"You are always in some sort of a rush." he countered from the bathroom.
"Ok just 'cause I like to be somewhat on time for things, doesnt mean Im in a rush." I trailed in a sickly sweet voice. "Lex, we're going to be in the car for a couple hours no one important is going to see you."
"On the contrary my sister, Hannah is coming, and meeting us in the city." and with that note I faked a silent gagging motion, causing Rian and Jack to shake their heads in agreement and laugh.
I will admit that I didn't like Hannah one bit once she started dating my brother, sure she was cordial in front of others but behind closed doors, when it was just her and me, she was an absolute bitch. For some twisted reason she got the idea in her head that I was the devil and trying to keep Alex from her. In one swift motion, Zack stood up taking me with him, bridal style, making me laugh my self sore.
"Zack, put me down!" I laughed, climbing onto my own feet. Then I ran, as fast as I freaking could, dodging furniture and darting outside.
"Devon," he replied, with his lips brushing against my ear, once he finally caught me running outside around the house and tackled me to the ground, still laughing.
"I love you. I love you so much it hurts," I blurted, my genuine feelings coming out for the first time in weeks. "I-I-I just--" he cut me off by crushing his lips to mine, making my insides go all fuzzy. Two teens making out on the front lawn might have looked kinda funny, but with all that goes on at my house this was the least of our neighbors problems.
"I know we said it before but this summer everything is changing and I just want you to know how much you mean to my Zack. Last summer I was me applying to colleges, parties and us. This summer just makes the world seem surreal, Im moving out, into New York City. You guys im sure will visit and/or be staying with me a lot, and Im sure the band will take off any second now. Its seems like yesterday everything that I was worrying about doesnt matter anymore."
"I love you too Devon. Just relax, you're babbling." he joked. It was like his body relaxed for the first time in months, and his cheeks flushed as he rested his forehead on mine.
"Im nervous," I admitted.
"About what babe?" he asked, with his brow coming together looking more worried than he usually does.
"School, what will happen when Im gone," my anxiety going through the roof. "What will happen to us plus all the distance?"
"Its barely 3 hours in the car babe, we will be fine. I will come visit you all time until you start school, and even then, you're gunna wanna get rid of me at some point." He then picked me up by the waist with his huge arms, I returned his gesture by peppering his face with kisses. That is until he set me down and held my face in his hands, then pulled us together into a kiss that they write about in books.
"Im gunna miss this," I muttered when the 'never ending kiss' actually ended.
"What do you mean?"
"Just us, doing whatever we want whenever. Just us living infitintly, together." and with that he kissed me again, so gently yet so passionate at the same time. We walked around the house sitting on the porch swing out back and talked for a few more minutes just about nonsense until we went inside, but as we opened the back door there seemed to be a lot of yelling coming from the kitchen.
"What the-" I breathed, looking confused at Zack he simply shrugged his shoulders.
"How could you? I get you were drunk but did you even try to tell them no? " the voice had dulled, but was the voice of my 'brother', Jack.
"Jay, pleas-" her voiced pleaded.
"No, Jade. You have no right to call me that anymore, just leave please." his voice dripped with hurt. I turned the corner with Zack in toe, greeted with a tear faced Jack and his soon-to-be ex-girlfriend, Jade. To say the least, we didn't get along either.
"What the fuck are you doing in my house?!" I began, anger fueling my defensive side. These boys were my life, and when anyone threatened them or hurt them in anyway, I turned into a real bitch. I walked in between the 'couple' facing Jade.
"I am here to talk to my boyfriend-"
"Ex-boyfriend." Jack interjected, making me laugh.
"You are here to talk to no one, now please leave before I do something you might not like." I snapped.
"This is none of your business, whore, now get out of my way." she said in a bitter tone, taking a step towards me, big mistake. I unconsciously felt my hands form fists and just as my instincts kicked in, hands were on my arms preventing from doing any damage.
"Please Dev, just drop it. Let her go." Jack whispered in my ear.
"Let go of me Jack." I hissed, immediately feeling his hands drop, knowing the consequences weren't pretty.
"Now you," I sneered, taking a step towards Jade, so close that our noses were almost touching. "I warned you once, now get out of my house."
"Fine momma grizzly, back off Im leaving." she said, taking a step back with a grin on her face and her hands held up in surrender. Once she had turned around I turned back to my sobbing guitar player sitting on the ground. But before I could console my 'little brother' I saw Jade turn around in the corner of my eye, her face holding an unbecoming rage and her fists balled to kill.
In one swift motion I pushed Jack further away from the massacre that was about to happen and turned to Jade just in time to catch her fist in my hand. "Sucker for a sob story aren't ya Dev," she hissed in my face. "Or at least what it used to take to get a guy in bed." I wasnt proud of my passed but I definitely wouldnt be slut-shamed for it, I knew what I was doing back then and Ive changed a lot since then.
"You talk too much honey," I laughed as my fist oh-so-graciously whacked her gut, which would have peacefully ended this but she came back for more and when she saw my face I swear there was hint of regret that came across hers. I laughed into her face, before balling up my fist, and as my body turned I grabbed her jacket, pulling her face into my fist, blood immediately falling out of her now broken nose and onto her clothes and the floor as she fell to the ground, crying in pain and her eyes drowning in shock as she ran out the front door.
"That was a bit dramatic, don't ya think?" Jack spoke.
"No, not really. Whatever she did, she deserved it, and not you." I closed the space between us and hugged my lanky guitar player. "Im here if you need to talk love."
"Thanks Dee."
"Ok, I'm really ready this time." Alex called from the catwalk. "Woah what did I miss?"
"Thank god, oh Jack was just helping me take out the trash." I laughed.

"Okay then," he trailed. "The car is packed right?"
"Yes Lex, it was packed at noon and its now three." I said looking at the clock. "Shit we have to get going."
"This is the paaaaaaart," Jack whined, throwing a small temper tantrum.
"What part?" Alex and I said in unison, making us laugh.
"The part where we have to say goodbye," Zack stated in a sullen tone as he entered the room.
~*~

Our goodbyes were short but none-the-less meaningful. There were a lot of tears from Jack, who as over dramatic as he was at times; he rarely cried, unless he was watching any Home Alone movie that is. I kept in mind that they were my home, no matter how far they went, they were my family. We met our parents at their work on the way, for a quick goodbye and last minute parental advice, even though we would be seeing them tomorrow.
To say the least the car ride was uneventful, basically it was Alex and I screaming our hearts out with Blink-182 lyrics, among many others. I had stopped at a hotel just outside the city, that way we wouldn't have much further to drive in the morning, plus Alex was passed out in the passenger seat so he didnt have much say. Alex and I had something stronger than a sibling bond, I couldn't quite put my finger on it but I knew it was something else. We rarely ever fought, and we were always together. We moved in sync at all times. I loved him with every bone in my body, so much that it hurt, and I would do anything to protect him.
The next day, Hannah had ended up at the apartment before us so she had to sit there and wait another half hour for us. We left the hotel at 10:45 because we slept late and I was grateful that I was moving to a city where everything was practically within walking distance.
"Lex this is beautifull! Come look at this view." After we unpacked the car and waited for our parents to drive in with the moving truck and our furniture, I had climbed the fire escape and was now standing on our roof, which although was indeed a roof it had charm to it with there being patio furniture and half dead plants at least, I saw potential.
"Wow," I heard him breath, words couldn't honestly describe this view.
"Babe this is beautiful!" Hannah's sing song tone and horrible personality followed us up to the roof unfortunately.
"Yeah, I know. Can you go see if my parents are here? I thought I saw a truck." he said flatly.
"Sure, I guess."
"Thanks babe." and after she was out of an earshot he sat down next to me. "Sorry she is here, I know it was our day."
"Lex, you don't have to be sorry, just please don't leave me alone with her. There is a whole other side of that girl you have yet to see." I admitted.
"Ok, just try to play nice."
"Hey, I keep the claws in unless someone else brings them out." I argued.
"Alright, but we don't need a repeat of what happened with Jade."
"Don't even start," that bitch had it coming.
"Um, Dee, do you think you could not be here tonight for like an hour?"
"Gross. But sure, I would like to keep my hearing." I scoffed.
"Thanks Dev, you're the best!" he squeezed me, with his tone being quite dramatic and sarcastic all at the same time.

~*~

Two hours later I found myself the same place that I had stood four months ago. As agreed, I had given the happy couple their time alone and went to walk around the neighborhood, finding myself in front of the tattoo shop where I had gotten the rose for Tom on my collarbone done, Alex got the identical rose but on his hand. I walked into the familiar parlor, with mirrored windows facing outwards, one couldnt see inside without actually coming inside. The inside was painted a deep crimson, with gold finishings and small details everywhere, and the scent of rubbing alcohol filled the air.
"Devon?" my head swiveled, nearly giving me whiplash. I turned to the familiar artist that had inked my rose. "Neil isn't going to believe this."
"Dylan right?" I barely remembered his name.
"Hitting me where it hurts." he said, feigning hurt and putting a hand to his chest. "Nah girl I'm just joking. We're cool."
"Okay good, I guess."
"No its not-"
"There she is! I told you she would come back, the ladies can't resist my charm. Cole, you owe me twenty." Neil charged over to where I was standing, hugging me and lifting me off the ground. I laughed at their boyish nonsense, but was used to it.
Neil was in his mid-twenties, tatted obviously, with a gorgeous black mop of hair giving him a couple more inches to his six foot three frame. He was a bad boy kinda cute with a personality that could kill.
I hugged Neil back with some enthusiasm but it did not match his own. "So my little artist, what brings you back to my city? Baltimore boring yet?" he teased.
"Your city?" I scoffed. "Baltimore is just fine thank you. But I just moved here for the summer with my brother, you remember Alex." he nodded. "I start classes at NYU in the fall. Well he and his bitch claimed our new apartment for the night so I began to wander. I also needed a job so I figured my wandering would turn up something-"
"Oh my god. This couldn't be more perfect." he started shouting and also jumping up and down, then disappeared into the back of the shop, returning with a few papers. "You're hired, just fill out these papers." I stood there with my jaw on the floor.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I figured we needed a cute receptionist to greet people at the door. Plus when you are welcoming people, you can work on some sketches, I know your type. You love to draw, a natural genius with an excellent taste in music, you read books too, but you have a wild side, you would love to travel the world, a dark past, and a gorgeous boss. Plus if someone buys your sketch you get commission."
"Wow, thats great, and spot on."
"Does this mean you accept the job?!" he pouted.
"How could I turn down that kind of offer." I said blushing a little bit.
~*~
On my walk home I called Zack, letting him know about the new job.
"Wow babe, Im so happy for you! Thats such a perfect fit!" he shouted, making me pull my phone away from my ear.
"I know Im very excited," I trailed.
"Whats wrong?"
"I just, I miss you. I know I saw you less than 48 hours ago, but that was goodbye. I want more time," I babbled.
"Babe, relax. We will make it work honey. I love you," he whispered through the phone, giving me goosebumps with his low voice.
"Yes I know, I just see how happy, using that term loosly, Alex is with Hannah, and it makes me miss the goofy stuff we used to do too."
"Like what baby?" he asked.
"Like us getting the house to ourselves and just relaxing in comfy clothes, chasing each other around the house with marsh mellow guns; or when we feed each other ice cream blind folded and just dumb stuff like me licking your nose when you try to kiss me," I breathed, my heart racing and aching more with each beat.

By this time I was walking upstairs to the apartment reaching for my keys I managed to drop my phone and hang up on Zack when I tried to catch it from falling. I decided I would call him back once I got home and settled for the night. So I continued to climb the stairs to the door and unlocked my new home to an alarming surprise.

Notes

my bittersweet baby, im back after a long hiatus and my life has turned upside down and back again. please let me know what you think of the new and improved story, I would like to know what you guys think of the stories in my head.