When Jack lost, I was pretty proud of the fact that I could handle my liquor better than him. Unfortunately, Nyssa couldn’t carry his drunken behind alone and Vic had to throw in the towel. Alex wised up and quit shortly after. I could tell he was feeling the booze. His eyes were pretty cloudy and his face was a little droopy.
“Alright I’m out too. Come on Alex, let’s head back to the bus and sober you up a little,” I got off Alex and helped him off the couch. Luckily, he wasn’t too drunk to not be able to walk. All I had to do was make sure he walked a straight enough line to the bus.
I helped Alex out of his jeans so he could sleep in his shirt and boxers. I went to check on Jack and see if Nyssa was here. When I opened her curtain, I found her bed stripped. I looked down in Jack’s bunk to find him passes out. Alone.
That’s when I felt my heart being crushed again. My lungs stopped working again and I was gasping for air. My hands started to shake, my palms started to sweat, and the sensation of pins and needles took over my entire body. My head started spinning. My eyes slammed shut again, tears building up heavily in them.
This was really bad.
♪Alex♪
I was pretty fucked up. I was barely aware of everything around. But I was snapped out of my drunken daze when I heard someone gasping for air. I got out of my bunk just in time to catch Bonnie before she could hit the floor. I felt her shaking in my arms. She was having another attack and I had no idea on what started it. I looked up into Nyssa’s bunk, only to find it empty. I checked Jack’s bunk and she wasn’t there either. She was gone. I grabbed my phone from my jeans and called Matt.
“Matt, we have a problem. Bonnie’s having another attack. Find Nyssa,” I told him as soon as he answered.
“You got it. I’ll bring to the bus when I find her,” I hung up after he said that and I took Bonnie into the back lounged and laid her down on one of the couches.
“Come on Bonnie, you can get through this. Nyssa’s fine. She might have taken her blanket and pillow inside to nap in a dressing room since it’s too warm on the bus. Everything’s fine. I promise,” I begged her to wake up. But she didn’t respond. So I decided to sing to her.
‘I’m lost in empty pillow talk, again. I’m lost in empty pillow talk, again. The bed’s an island made of feather down, and I’m stuck here alone with little else but a memory of you on memory foam. Visions of a brighter love, I’d kill for one more day to pool my thoughts, and find the words to say: If thee sheets were the states, and you were miles away. I’d fold them end over end to bring you closer to me. Because I can’t sleep at all without you pressed up against me. I settle for long distance calls, I’m lost in empty pillow talk again.’
Bonnie didn’t pull out of her attack, but her shaking stopped. Her eyes were still shut and her breathing was labored. I heard small foot falls behind me. I turned around to find Nyssa standing there.
“What happened,” she asked.
“Bonnie’s having another attack. I think when she saw your empty bunk, she freaked out,” I told her.
“Can I be alone with her? I want to explain myself to her. I think it’ll pull her out of this,” I was against leaving Bonnie’s side if she woke up with only Nyssa only to slip again when I wasn’t there. But I knew that if Nyssa wanted to explain herself to Bonnie alone, she knew it would help her recover.
“I’ll be up in the front lounge. Come and get me when she pulls out of this, okay,” I told Nyssa. She simply nodded in response and I took my leave.
Please be alright, Bonnie. I can’t stand to see you like this.
♪Bonnie♪
“Bonnie, I need you to wake up. The reason I was gone was because Jack scared me. He was too drunk and he frightened me. I’m staying on the Pierce bus for the night so Jack can sober up before Vic and I talk to him tomorrow,” I heard a familiar, feminine voice call to me. I only felt her presence, not the male one that was singing to me. I opened my eyes and found Nyssa hovering over me.
“Nyssa,” I breathed, still scared out of my mind.
“It’s alright, Bonnie. I’m okay. You need to relax. Just breathe,” she was so calm. She wasn’t supposed to be so calm around me when I’m like this.
“I need him. I need Alex. Nyssa I need Alex,” I was panicking. I needed him to hold me together. I could feel my mind slipping to where my dark monsters were.
“He’s in the front lounge, I’ll get him. Just breathe nice and slow,” Nyssa took off to the front of the bus. I ran my hand through my hair, pulling on it hard. I brought one of my fingers to my mouth and started chewing on the skin of my fingertip, drawing blood. I hadn’t realized I had kept biting it until it was pulled away and I looked to find Alex holding my hand and looking deeply into my eyes.
“Bonnie, relax. I’m right here now. You’re going to be fine. I’m not leaving you. Just relax and breathe,” Alex looked like he might have an attack, seeing me so out of my mind. I must have looked insane.
“Don’t leave me alone. Don’t let my monsters come out. I’m scared,” I rambled incoherently. I sounded like a small child crying over monster under her bed.
“You don’t have to be scared. I’m here. I’ll fight them back with you,” Alex picked me up and sat down on the couch with me in his lap, holding me to him tightly. I cried heavily into his chest as he stroked my hair.
“Nyssa, I think you should head back to where you’re sleeping for the night. It’ll be Vic and I that will talk to Jack about what happened tonight. I’ll have Bonnie calmed down by the morning,” I heard Alex tell Nyssa.
“Be strong Bonnie. I’ll see you in the morning,” Nyssa said before I heard her walk off the bus.
I cried for several hours, whimpering about how my monsters were coming for me. I eventually fell asleep in Alex’s arms, and I never stopped crying. He never stopped whispering that he wasn’t going to leave me alone to fight the monsters back.