Stupid and Fearless
Nightmares
“Hey Jamie. I’m not sure if you remember me but it’s Diana, Alex’s girlfriend.” I pace the bus with Jack hot on my trail.
“Oh wow, hey how are you?” She asks.
“I’m pretty good. Touring with the guys is a lot of fun.”
“That’s nice.” I can tell that hurt her a little.
“Look, I lied. Things aren’t really that good. Jack has been driving me nuts. He’s been drinking a lot more and depressed most of the time. I finally got to talk to him about it last night and he broke down telling me it was because he misses you.”
Jack sits on the couch and catches me by the waist, pulling me on top of him. He shoves his ear against the phone so he can hear her response.
“Then why didn’t he take me? It’s a little hard to believe this Diana.” She sighs.
“He didn’t take you because last time the guys tried something like this, the girl controlled everything. She wouldn’t let them be who they wanted. Jack was scared that’s what would happen if you came. Now, he sees that Alex and I have been able to make this work and he wants exactly what we have. He doesn’t just want we have. Jamie he wants you back.”
There was a silence, a sniffle, and then she spoke. “I miss him so much Diana.”
“Then come on tour with us. He offered to fly you out to LA this weekend. We have a few days off so this way you two can catch up. Please for the love of god say yes. He misses you like crazy and it’d be nice to have another girl on tour.” I beg.
Jack bounces up and down with anticipation, making my head hurt a little considering I’m on his lap.
“Can I talk to him?” She asks.
Jack snatches the phone from me and throws me off of his lap. “Jamie.”
I laugh and walk back to where Alex is still asleep in his bunk. Jack had woken me up at the ass crack of dawn so I could call Jamie. Slowly, I crawl back into Alex’s bunk trying not to wake him. Unfortunately, I fail.
“You good babe?” He mumbles.
“Yes, go back to sleep.” I whisper.
Ignoring me, Alex pulls me on top of him and plants kisses all over my face.
“I want a tattoo when we hit up LA.” I state.
“Sounds good babe. Any ideas?” He yawns.
“Nah, not yet. I’ll let you know.” I reply, dozing off into a sleep.
Alex and I wake up in each other’s arms in the bunk. I decide to step outside the bus and stretch. As I crawl out of the bunk, I slip on a pair of Toms and pad out into the main section of the bus. Jack is passed out asleep on one of the couches and I grin at him. I walk off the bus and feel a cold air hit me.
That’s strange. It’s supposed to be hot in Arizona right now.
I lift my arms up in the air, stretching my tummy. All of a sudden, I feel someone grab me and blindfold me. I begin to scream and kick, feeling as if I am in immediate danger. I hear nothing but the wind whistling around me and the footsteps of my abductor.
“Who are you?” I gasp.
Silence.
“Please, tell me who you are.”
More silence.
Then, the blindfold was torn off of my eyes and I realize that I am in John and I’s house. I freeze and look around and come face to face with the one and only John.
“Diana.” He growls.
I scream and try to run, but I can’t. My legs won’t move fast enough but John’s are working perfectly. He tackles me to the floor and starts tearing off my clothes.
“STOP!” I cry out. “PLEASE John if you ever loved me just stop!”
But he doesn’t stop.
He tears his clothes off and forces himself into me. I begin to cry and John slaps me across the face.
“SHUT UP.” He yells. “WHERE’S YOU’RE LITTLE FAG BOYFRIEND NOW?”
John continues to thrust into me relentlessly.
“Alex.” I cry. “Alex where are you?”
“Princess I’m right here.”
All of a sudden my eyes fly open and find Alex’s arms wrapped tightly around me and him whispering to me.
“You’re okay, it’s just a dream.” He soothes me.
Immediately, I start to bawl my eyes out. “John. He-he-“
“He isn’t here and won’t be.” Alex interrupts me. “You are safe I promise.”
I sniffle softly and relax, realizing it was only a dream. “I hated that.” I sigh.
“I know Di. It’s okay though, I promise.” He kisses the side of my head.
“I used to have night terrors all the time when I was younger. The subject varied every time, but when I would be in a traumatic event I would get dozens. I know this is one of the many I’ll be having. I thought I grew out of it but I guess not.” A new set of tears threaten to spill over.
Alex pauses for a second and steps out of the bunk. “Get dressed. We are going somewhere.”
I don’t question him and get dressed. Alex slips on some jeans and leaves his white t-shirt on as he walks towards the driver. I see them exchange some words and the bus driver reluctantly gave in to whatever Alex’s demand was. I slip on some shorts and a white t-shirt to match Alex’s. I grab my converse and head to the couch Alex is sitting on.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“You’ll see. It should be about another 15 minutes.” He replies simply and slips an arm around my shoulder.
I relax into his embrace and see Jack sitting in front of us with a big goofy grin on his face.
“I freaking love you Diana.” Jack smiles at me. “Not like that, but you know what I mean.” He quickly clarifies so Alex doesn’t get uncomfortable.
Alex looks at me questioningly. “I talked to Jamie and convinced her to come on tour with us. Jack misses her.” I explain.
Alex raises his eyebrows in surprise but smiles nonetheless. “That’ll be awesome man. When is she coming?”
Jack explains the whole LA plan thing to Alex and I zone out momentarily. That dream is still on my mind and it’s creeping me out. What if these night terrors follow me throughout the tour? How embarrassing would that be. They can get pretty intense.
When I was younger, I would have night terrors about almost everything. First, it was tornados. They would haunt my dreams, taking me and everything I ever loved with it. Then it was the fear of drowning. My dreams would engulf me to the bottom of the ocean, cutting off my source of oxygen. Then I would have night terrors when John would leave me home alone and go out with his friends. I would dream that he was never coming back. I dreamt he was in a car accident on the way home and died. I dreamt that he came home with friends and tried to kill me. The night terrors never end. As soon as one bad dream starts, I have bad dreams for weeks about that same subject. I have never in my life been able to have one nightmare, without at least 3 more reoccurring consecutively.
Alex squeezes my side, taking me out of my thoughts.
“You okay babe?” He looks at me concerned.
“Yeah, I just can’t get night terrors out of my mind. I’m scared they’ll keep coming. That’s what happened all the time when I was younger.” I half smile nervously.
“It’ll be okay. I promise.” He lightly kisses the side of my head.
As he finishes his sentence, the bus comes to a screetching halt.
“WE’RE AT A MALL WE HAVE 15 MINUTES UNTIL WE GET BACK ON THE ROAD.” Alex calls to Rian and Zach who are in the back of the bus.
Alex pulls me off my feet and Jack follows us. We walk into the mall and Alex starts looking around frantically.
“What are we looking for?” I ask.
“I’ll know when I see it.” He answers, still looking around. “THERE.” He nearly jumps.
He grabs my hand and speed walks to a Native American-type looking store. He pulls me in and pulls aside an associate.
“Dream catchers?” He asks softly. I can barely hear him.
She points to the back wall and Alex thanks her. Jack sticks to the front of the store, looking at some of the books.
We go to the back room and stare at the hundreds of feather dream catchers.
“Pick one for our bunk.” Alex smiles at me.
I look up at him, astounded. I have heard of these before, but never used them. How Alex could come to this conclusion just off the top of his head is amazing. He just gets more and more perfect.
I look at them and decide I should get a semi small one. I pick the black one with purple feathers and turn to Alex for approval. He nods and smiles, directing me towards the counter. Alex pays for me, claiming it’s a little gift for tolerating everything on tour so far.
“I love you.” I kiss him as the lady wraps up the dream catcher.
“I love you more.” He kisses the tip of my nose.
“Never.”
We grab the bag and Jack on our way out the door. Realizing we only have a couple of minutes until it’s time to leave, we pick up our pace. Quickly, we board the bus and thank the driver for the pit stop.
I rush back to our bunk and grab some tape. I tape it to the top of the ceiling, and admire it dangling. Alex comes up from behind me and slips his arms around my waist.
“Better?” He mumbles.
“Perfect.” I whisper.
We hear the bus start up and feel as it lurches forward.
Back on the road we go.
“Oh wow, hey how are you?” She asks.
“I’m pretty good. Touring with the guys is a lot of fun.”
“That’s nice.” I can tell that hurt her a little.
“Look, I lied. Things aren’t really that good. Jack has been driving me nuts. He’s been drinking a lot more and depressed most of the time. I finally got to talk to him about it last night and he broke down telling me it was because he misses you.”
Jack sits on the couch and catches me by the waist, pulling me on top of him. He shoves his ear against the phone so he can hear her response.
“Then why didn’t he take me? It’s a little hard to believe this Diana.” She sighs.
“He didn’t take you because last time the guys tried something like this, the girl controlled everything. She wouldn’t let them be who they wanted. Jack was scared that’s what would happen if you came. Now, he sees that Alex and I have been able to make this work and he wants exactly what we have. He doesn’t just want we have. Jamie he wants you back.”
There was a silence, a sniffle, and then she spoke. “I miss him so much Diana.”
“Then come on tour with us. He offered to fly you out to LA this weekend. We have a few days off so this way you two can catch up. Please for the love of god say yes. He misses you like crazy and it’d be nice to have another girl on tour.” I beg.
Jack bounces up and down with anticipation, making my head hurt a little considering I’m on his lap.
“Can I talk to him?” She asks.
Jack snatches the phone from me and throws me off of his lap. “Jamie.”
I laugh and walk back to where Alex is still asleep in his bunk. Jack had woken me up at the ass crack of dawn so I could call Jamie. Slowly, I crawl back into Alex’s bunk trying not to wake him. Unfortunately, I fail.
“You good babe?” He mumbles.
“Yes, go back to sleep.” I whisper.
Ignoring me, Alex pulls me on top of him and plants kisses all over my face.
“I want a tattoo when we hit up LA.” I state.
“Sounds good babe. Any ideas?” He yawns.
“Nah, not yet. I’ll let you know.” I reply, dozing off into a sleep.
Alex and I wake up in each other’s arms in the bunk. I decide to step outside the bus and stretch. As I crawl out of the bunk, I slip on a pair of Toms and pad out into the main section of the bus. Jack is passed out asleep on one of the couches and I grin at him. I walk off the bus and feel a cold air hit me.
That’s strange. It’s supposed to be hot in Arizona right now.
I lift my arms up in the air, stretching my tummy. All of a sudden, I feel someone grab me and blindfold me. I begin to scream and kick, feeling as if I am in immediate danger. I hear nothing but the wind whistling around me and the footsteps of my abductor.
“Who are you?” I gasp.
Silence.
“Please, tell me who you are.”
More silence.
Then, the blindfold was torn off of my eyes and I realize that I am in John and I’s house. I freeze and look around and come face to face with the one and only John.
“Diana.” He growls.
I scream and try to run, but I can’t. My legs won’t move fast enough but John’s are working perfectly. He tackles me to the floor and starts tearing off my clothes.
“STOP!” I cry out. “PLEASE John if you ever loved me just stop!”
But he doesn’t stop.
He tears his clothes off and forces himself into me. I begin to cry and John slaps me across the face.
“SHUT UP.” He yells. “WHERE’S YOU’RE LITTLE FAG BOYFRIEND NOW?”
John continues to thrust into me relentlessly.
“Alex.” I cry. “Alex where are you?”
“Princess I’m right here.”
All of a sudden my eyes fly open and find Alex’s arms wrapped tightly around me and him whispering to me.
“You’re okay, it’s just a dream.” He soothes me.
Immediately, I start to bawl my eyes out. “John. He-he-“
“He isn’t here and won’t be.” Alex interrupts me. “You are safe I promise.”
I sniffle softly and relax, realizing it was only a dream. “I hated that.” I sigh.
“I know Di. It’s okay though, I promise.” He kisses the side of my head.
“I used to have night terrors all the time when I was younger. The subject varied every time, but when I would be in a traumatic event I would get dozens. I know this is one of the many I’ll be having. I thought I grew out of it but I guess not.” A new set of tears threaten to spill over.
Alex pauses for a second and steps out of the bunk. “Get dressed. We are going somewhere.”
I don’t question him and get dressed. Alex slips on some jeans and leaves his white t-shirt on as he walks towards the driver. I see them exchange some words and the bus driver reluctantly gave in to whatever Alex’s demand was. I slip on some shorts and a white t-shirt to match Alex’s. I grab my converse and head to the couch Alex is sitting on.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“You’ll see. It should be about another 15 minutes.” He replies simply and slips an arm around my shoulder.
I relax into his embrace and see Jack sitting in front of us with a big goofy grin on his face.
“I freaking love you Diana.” Jack smiles at me. “Not like that, but you know what I mean.” He quickly clarifies so Alex doesn’t get uncomfortable.
Alex looks at me questioningly. “I talked to Jamie and convinced her to come on tour with us. Jack misses her.” I explain.
Alex raises his eyebrows in surprise but smiles nonetheless. “That’ll be awesome man. When is she coming?”
Jack explains the whole LA plan thing to Alex and I zone out momentarily. That dream is still on my mind and it’s creeping me out. What if these night terrors follow me throughout the tour? How embarrassing would that be. They can get pretty intense.
When I was younger, I would have night terrors about almost everything. First, it was tornados. They would haunt my dreams, taking me and everything I ever loved with it. Then it was the fear of drowning. My dreams would engulf me to the bottom of the ocean, cutting off my source of oxygen. Then I would have night terrors when John would leave me home alone and go out with his friends. I would dream that he was never coming back. I dreamt he was in a car accident on the way home and died. I dreamt that he came home with friends and tried to kill me. The night terrors never end. As soon as one bad dream starts, I have bad dreams for weeks about that same subject. I have never in my life been able to have one nightmare, without at least 3 more reoccurring consecutively.
Alex squeezes my side, taking me out of my thoughts.
“You okay babe?” He looks at me concerned.
“Yeah, I just can’t get night terrors out of my mind. I’m scared they’ll keep coming. That’s what happened all the time when I was younger.” I half smile nervously.
“It’ll be okay. I promise.” He lightly kisses the side of my head.
As he finishes his sentence, the bus comes to a screetching halt.
“WE’RE AT A MALL WE HAVE 15 MINUTES UNTIL WE GET BACK ON THE ROAD.” Alex calls to Rian and Zach who are in the back of the bus.
Alex pulls me off my feet and Jack follows us. We walk into the mall and Alex starts looking around frantically.
“What are we looking for?” I ask.
“I’ll know when I see it.” He answers, still looking around. “THERE.” He nearly jumps.
He grabs my hand and speed walks to a Native American-type looking store. He pulls me in and pulls aside an associate.
“Dream catchers?” He asks softly. I can barely hear him.
She points to the back wall and Alex thanks her. Jack sticks to the front of the store, looking at some of the books.
We go to the back room and stare at the hundreds of feather dream catchers.
“Pick one for our bunk.” Alex smiles at me.
I look up at him, astounded. I have heard of these before, but never used them. How Alex could come to this conclusion just off the top of his head is amazing. He just gets more and more perfect.
I look at them and decide I should get a semi small one. I pick the black one with purple feathers and turn to Alex for approval. He nods and smiles, directing me towards the counter. Alex pays for me, claiming it’s a little gift for tolerating everything on tour so far.
“I love you.” I kiss him as the lady wraps up the dream catcher.
“I love you more.” He kisses the tip of my nose.
“Never.”
We grab the bag and Jack on our way out the door. Realizing we only have a couple of minutes until it’s time to leave, we pick up our pace. Quickly, we board the bus and thank the driver for the pit stop.
I rush back to our bunk and grab some tape. I tape it to the top of the ceiling, and admire it dangling. Alex comes up from behind me and slips his arms around my waist.
“Better?” He mumbles.
“Perfect.” I whisper.
We hear the bus start up and feel as it lurches forward.
Back on the road we go.
So I stumbled across the first installment of this and started reading. Needless to say, I'm all caught up and just finished with what you had of this second installment. This story is so cute and I really love it.
If you ever find yourself writing for it again, I will be here to read. I think these characters deserve an ending. <3 Some ideas you could work with is writing a chapter with what song exactly he chose to dedicate to her (the fact that that is where it left off is killing me) as well as maybe approaching how the fans react to their relationship. At the very beginning you brought up the fact of either keeping it hidden or putting it out there, but it was never approached again, so that may be something to approach if you continue with this, which I really hope you do. Like will the relationship still be hidden? And if so, what kind of toll would it take on them? Just a thought or idea to maybe inspire you to continue this, since it seemed like you were struggling with writer's block.
But if you don't continue, I just wanted to leave a comment letting you know I really enjoyed what you have of this. You're a really great writer. Just wanted to show you that people like me are still stumbling across this story and enjoying it. :) Once again, I will be one reader here if you ever choose to continue.
1/2/17