There's A Ghost In This Room

My heart sank when I ran into my house to see my mom drinking recklessly in the living room.
I hated to see my mom this way, and I hated that Alex’s words had to be true when he told me about what state she was in.
“Mom! What the heck are you doing??” I yelled at her, as she poured herself a glass of vodka.
“What's it look like, sweetheart?” She let out a bitter laugh and drank from the glass.
“Why? Why Mom?!” I felt myself getting more and more upset as I stood there and watched her.
I felt angered that my mother had to go into self destruct mode every time things got tough. But then again, I guess that makes me a hypocrite.
“Why what?” She snapped.
“Why are you drinking? Why are you doing this when you know it hurts me??” Tears started collecting in my eyes, but I knew she wouldn't care. All she cares about now, is the bottle.
“Well, you know what hurts me, Bethany? It hurts that you would bring that stupid boy here! How dare he show up here after all he's done to us??”
“Are you insane, Mom? Are you even hearing yourself?? He was a little kid, Mom!”
“That issss no f-fucking excuse!! He ripped our family apart! Because of that stupid boy, your father left us. And now look at us!” She slurred, angrily taking another swig of her drink.
“Mom, no! It isn't even his fault!! He was a shy little kid, Mom. He didn't mean to-“
“Oh, so he was shy?? Did he have that little anxiety disorder? Was he retarded, like you?”
Ouch, that one really stung. Especially coming from my own mother.
I knew to disregard the hurtful things she would say while she was drunk, but it didn't mean that I didn't think about them, sometimes. Alcohol can be total truth serum. I'm sure that whatever slips out of her mouth about me, is what she secretly thinks about me all the time. And I guess that's what hurts the most about it.
I didn't want her to see me cry, so I just shook my head and gave up. I was giving up on my mother. I turned and ran upstairs to my room and slammed the door shut.
I leaned against the door with my eyes squeezed shut. I just wanted to disappear. To be away from everyone and everything.
I couldn't help myself when I pierced my nails into the skin on my wrist, and dug them across; leaving angry red marks that would scab over, later.
They were starting to sting, but I didn't care. I couldn't possibly feel more pain than I was enduring already.
I quickly changed my clothes, and dragged myself into bed. I wanted to sleep, but I just stayed awake, crying into my pillow for thirty minutes. Or at least that's how long it lasted, until I felt someone running their fingers through my hair.
I turned around in bed and faced Alex’s body. He gave me a small smile, and wiped the tears from my cheeks.
He knew that he didn't need to ask me if I was okay or anything. He knew exactly what I was feeling. And why I was feeling it. We'd gone through this plenty of times before, and he always knew the right thing to do.
He just stroked his thumb against my hand, while running his fingers through my hair with his other hand.
No words were needed in that moment.
I just found myself calming down more and more with his touch, and slowly feeling the pain fade away the more I looked into his round, hazel eyes.
We just stayed like that for a while, until I started getting sleepy and could hardly keep my eyes open.
He chuckled at me, and moved my hair out of my eyes.
“Do you have homework?” He asked in a soft voice.
I shrugged and sleepily answered, “I dunno..I did most of it at school, but I have a bit of math left that I can just finish in the morning..”
“No, I'll just do it while you're sleeping.” He insisted, causing me to open my eyes wide.
“No, Alex! You don't have to do my homework for me, I'll just-“
“No, it's okay. Plus, I owe you for being such a jerk, earlier. It'll be done by the time you wake up, okay? Now go to bed.”
I knew I couldn't argue with him over this, so I just nodded, and closed my eyes again.
Sometimes I wonder how in the hell is it possible that I was gifted with such a great best friend like Alex.
Sometimes, I don't really think of him as a ghost. He's more like my guardian angel. Except without the wings.
“Night, Alex.”
He leaned over and gave me a quick kiss on the forehead.
“Night.”

Notes

Soooo...there's gonna be a lot of fluff/friendzoning going on before the magic happens.
My only motive is to frustrate you. >:)

I got hit in the face today by an annoying, aggressive guy who was playing basketball.
My jaw hurts. Fuck.

Sorry I haven't posted in a few days, I have finals next week and in whatever spare time I have, I'm usually working on my Jalex. I'm gonna start posting it soon.
Will you read it? Pretty please with Jack's boner on top??

Jack and Alex are hosting the APMAS on my birthday. This deserves a dancing gif.

That'll do.

Leave me comments! <3

Thanks! :)

Title cred: Miserable At Best- Mayday Parade