Therapy *Sequel to Circles*

"Shaden's P.O.V.

"Shay wake up we overslept its 11:30 everyone is leaving they said they'd meet us there so we have to get ready." Alan said shaking me awake. "Alright let me go get ready." I said rolling out of bed in this. "Shay I swear you are way to comfortable around me." Alan said laughing shaking his head. "Not like you haven't seen me like this before and I was a fair bit bigger then." I said heading to the bathroom to put in my contacts, and do my makeup shutting the door behind me about 15 minutes later. "Yea thats true to what you said before and man do I love your tattoo its amazing." He said coming in brushing his hair. "Yea I know its perfect." I said smiling its such a work of art. "Alright umm you go do whatever you have to do I am going to go get dressed stay in here till I say its clear." I said walking out closing the door. "Okay." He yelled. I walked over into my walk in closet to get changed. Once I was finished I went over to my night table taking all my meds. "Its clear Alan!" I shouted grabbing my cell and putting on suntan lotion. "That looks good on you." He said. "Thanks tiger almost ready to go?" I asked. "Yea did you tak..." "I just did before I called you out, but I still need to do my vitamins." I said heading downstairs to the kitchen. I walked in stood on my toes grabbing my Vitamins and a glass from the dish rack going and getting my passion tea. "Wow you have a lot of pills." He said. "Yea, but its all good." I said taking them. "Well I didn't know you had to take all of them." He said. "Its fine Alan I made sure if I was going to be the way I am vegetarian wise I'd be alright health wise because when I was a full vegetarian I almost died from lack of nutrition." I said. "Ah well I'm glad you didn't." Alan said hugging me. "Be to bored without me?" I said. "Nope not at all." He said poking my nose. "Hey Alan let go of me." I said. "Why and Okay." He said letting go. "Now what?" He asked. "This Your it." I said taking off running out the door with my purse with Raven in one hand and keys to my car in the other I was just about to the car when he picked me up. "Your not that fast." He said. "You try running in a dress. Now get in we are already really late." I said.

* Skipping Drive*

"You Ready to show everyone the new you fully?" Alan asked as we started to head down to the beach where Shy text me to meet everyone. "Yea I'm a bit nervous though...." I said trailing off. "You look great don't worry." He said. "Hey Alan Finally get a girlfriend." Jamie yelled. We watched Rian smack him in the head causing us to laugh. "Look its the future mister, and misses Ashby!" Austin said. "Do they not realize its me?" I questioned sliding my Sun glasses down a bit. "Think about it want to have fun with it?" He said. "Yes so tricking your band the guys from mine since they stayed at a hotel and trick PTV too." I asked. "Yup so throw that accent on." He said. "Alright that's not a problem Tiger." I said putting it on. "Your good at that sure you're not meant to be australian." He said as we got really close. "Hey man and this is?" Austin said coming up with Jamie. "My girl." Alan said as if it was obvious. "Hey there nice too meet you."I said with my fake Australian Accent. "Hey guys!! Alan Does have a Girlfriend, and I think she's Australian or maybe British" Jamie yelled causing some of BVB, with MIW, ATL and their girls, Sammi, BOTDF, Lights, Kate, Brittany, Shy, Roxie, Jeff, and Skye to crack up a bit, but catch on to what's happening well besides Jinxx, Ash, and Jake. "Everyone come over so she can introduce herself." Austin yelled. "Thank you." I said as Alan kissed my cheek. Everyone piled over to us. "Wow alan she's not your usual type" Phil joked I think he caught on. "Why don't you introduce yourself babe?" Alan said. "Alright Hun so my name is Sage Adrian White. I am a singer, Photographer, and an Alternative Model." I said. "Oh wow its.... Wait!.... Shay?" Mike yelled, and Alan and I cracked up "Yea Hi guys." I said pulling off the sunglasses and hat. "What the hell you tricked us." Ash said smacking my arm. "Careful you dick she got a tattoo yesterday." Sammi said. Geez this must be odd her and Jinxx both being here. "Yea I don't know we thought it would be funny and well it was pretty good. I didn't want it to drag on so yea its me what do you think of the new me?" I got a lot of over talking and yea, and what a change or you look great's. "Where's Raven?" Alex asked over everyone. "Who's Raven?" Andy asked. "This little cutie." I said referring to the small cat in my arms. "She is so cute where did you get her?" He asked petting her. "All Time Low gave it to me well them and their girls." I said. "Well anyways you look great." Jake said smiling. I smiled back. "So I told you guys it was Alan!" Val exclaimed I saw Jake look down and away sadly so he isn't over me. "We aren't dating we were just tricking everyone." I said laughing. "Oh well I believed it you two are cute together." Val said lauging now sitting on a towel with Rocket. "Well everyone go off I am going to take pics since I can't go in the water." I said with that everyone took off while I sat down I took out my phone taking down all my old social media sites before making new ones. I looked up to see Jake coming over. "What you doing there." HE said taking a drink. "Nothing just getting new social media ID's after the other day." I said with a laugh. "Alright and just to let you know you look amazing like this." He said. "Oh Jake here." I said picking up my camera taking a pic of him then getting up taking off my dress before heading out with everyone else taking pics.

I walked down to the water with Jake just talking. "Its so nice to have you back" He said hugging me tight. "And you look so different none of us even recognized you." He said sitting down right by the water. "Yea I'll admit when I said I was changing I went bit I was always told go big, or go home plus this here is what I've always wanted to look like it just makes me feel like everything is going to be okay and be real now this made everything solidify that I am changing and that this is my life now there is Shaden Marie Heart, but she was a scared girl who let everyone walk all over her she was a druggie she's everything I'm not and I wanted to be someone better than myself for a change to wake up to a new world not be who I used to be I wanted help, and I got it. I wanted a new life and here it is you guys gave me a new look on life Jake. I know its bad to say, but if I had never won that contest I never would have met All Time Low which made me meet you guys, and well all that lead me to Skye, which lead me to finally meeting my sister which is something I can never thank enough for finding her. If I never met Shy, I wouldn't have met my real dad. and all to say in the end I never would have gotten help and I know my addictions would have won I would be dead right now, or soon." I said looking out at the ocean tearing up a bit. "Shay I never knew that's how you felt on all of this its actually crazy that all that happened to you especially since we met and I don't even know the rest of it and I feel like you went through way to much for you being your age, and I am glad your here still we'd all miss you a lot if your addictions had won and its amazing to have you in Hollywood not far from us. I'm going to promise you something I intend not to break that I am going to be there for you no matter what you're such a good friend to me you always worry about everyone else first you are something you don't find often enough out there." He said smiling up at me. "Thanks Jake that means a lot to me, but you should probably head off with everyone I want to get pictures." I said putting on a smile. "Alright, but let me know if you need anything." He said walking off.

I just can't shake this feeling from with in me like something is missing from all this. I watched some of the guys fool around and play football, while some were in the water seeing my sister and Ash run around splashing each other. I pulled up my camera catching a few shots of then till he tripped while picking her up spinning her around sending them both into the water laughing, I moved to watch Austin just sitting on the beach staring out, Alex,and Lisa laying on the blanket the brought together just smiling while she was pointing up. Today just seems like such an amazing start to a new life. "Shay come here." Alan called. "No I am taking pictures so bug other people." I called sticking out my tongue. I started to walk back to my blanket Shy brought for us I noticed for the first time a guitar case to be exact mine. I walked over opening it up before taking my dress putting it back on before taking my acoustic over to some rocks a bit away. I sat down and started to play what first came to my head which happened to be Oh Calamity I began to strum losing myself in the music thinking how this fit my mood today I can't think of why, but it feels that way and it made me lose myself in it more and more when it got to "Keep forgetting to remember where we've been is who we are, now all I do is wonder, why we ever set the scene, Oh, Calamity, its such a shame that we play strangers, No act to change what we've become, Damn, it such a shame that we built a wreck out of me." I was so lost in the lyrics feeling the pain of something missing a feeling I've always had, but never knew why, but this song feels like its filling that spot. I continued to sing with my whole soul in it when I was done I moved to doing Me Without You.

Do you feel like something's missing,
when your skin is pressed to mine?
I would whisper you a riot if you'd listen,
to the sound that you've ignored a thousand times...

'Cause I am only me when I'm without you,

All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break,
a piece of you that I couldn't take apart, but we're in pieces now,
and all you ever wanted was a part of me that I couldn't fake,
I never made it easy to shape my heart, but it's not beating now,
I have to let you down...

There is ice in place of answers,
and a cold that chills the bones,
When September came and went without an answer,
we were left to Fall for Winter on our own...

Now I am only me when I'm without you,

All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break,
a piece of you that I couldn't take apart, but we're in pieces now,
and all you ever wanted was a part of me that I couldn't fake,
I never made it easy to shape my heart, but it's not beating now,
I have to let you down...

('Cause I am only me, when I am without you,
yeah I am only me when I am without you...)

All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break,
a piece of you that I couldn't take apart, but we're in pieces now,

All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break, (yeah, I have to let you down...)
a piece of you that I couldn't take apart, but we're in pieces now, (I have to let you down,)
and all you ever wanted was a part of me that I couldn't fake,
I never made it easy to shape my heart, but it's not beating now,
I have to let you down...

"Shay are you alright?" Shy asked coming over with Ash. "Yea I am fine just noticed my guitar and couldn't resist I was actually about to play Mortician's Daughter then Would You Still Be There then I Don't Want To Be Like You." I said smiling brushing off the feeling. "Oh just decided to play?"She asked. "Yea soon as I was done I was going to go grab my water proof camera and go out in the water at least to my waist." I said heading back to the blanket grabbing my blue water proof camera. "Hey Shay?" Alex called. "Yea?" I called back. "That was great remind me we should have you sing with us again especially Oh Calamity." He said. "Yea maybe one time when you guys tour here." I said heading to the water to go join everyone else. "Hey Austin!" I yelled running at him holding the camera just as I was about to stop I tricked in and ran jumping knocking us in the water. "Shay!" He groaned when we came up. We all goofed off in the water before heading off to eat.
we set up the bone fire when it started to get dark. "Guys I just want to say one thing thank you all of you for being there to support me throught the last year and especailly when I needed it the most over the last 6 months. you guys are the best so here is a toast to fresh beginings, good friends, to music, family and just finally living life how it should be lived I love all of you really thank you. Cheers guy." I said raising my smirnoff Ice cooler.

The End

Notes