Circles

Shaden’s P.O.V.

I watched Jack head out the bus to go back to his how am I going to sing that song tonight I guess the song I wrote for the piano I could do myself tonight I could ask everyone if I could open do the song I’ve been working on maybe he will understand that nobody wins with this song yea they gave me a set today so Shy, and I are playing plus a few tecs for tonight its amazing to go over my whole EP. Shy even got the big grand piano ready too I’m so excited then I do my song with Alex then I say my good bye’s to the because in like 2 weeks we’ll be home packing to move wow everything is happening so fast.

I decided it was a lazy day to me since sound check is still 3 hours away I grabbed my track clothes before lazing on the bus watching Sucker Punch for like the millionth time, and warming up before heading over to the venue for sound check.

I can’t believe in 2 weeks we go home tour flew by in a blur but this was the best experience of my life. I need to get ready for the final performance I had decided to go full out tonight give myself a new look with the blue hair its time to get a new start for the mean time. Its time to Skype Momma. “Shy you wanna skype Mom with me?” “Sure why not I kinda miss her” she said coming out of the bathroom looking amazing in her stage clothes. I pulled up Skype giving her a ring.
“Hi Mom” We called soon as she accepted our call.
“Oh my goodness girls you look amazing Shay baby why is your hair blue? how are you?”
“I’m good Mom how are you?” Shy said
“I’m doing great I have some news, but first Shay answer the questions please?”
“I’m great Momma I miss you is all I know its only been 3 days, but still we got two weeks left. I can’t wait to see you and Mellie. Umm and well my hair is a good story I’ll just say download Keek Follow me, and Follow Jack, and yea it will show, but this is how is prank ended. We just wanted to see how you were doing back home before we went in I get to perfume my full EP pretty much tonight I’m so happy, but scared. I have to ask how is Mellie doing?”
“She is doing great, but I’m about to head to the gym so I have to go I love you girls, and will talk to you very soon”
“Bye Mom love you too.” We said ending the call.

“So Last night we should talk about it Shay because I know you clearly did that out of something else not for the fact of it was to end things, but if you don’t want to we won’t.” Shy said looking me dead in the eye with an understanding look. “I know we should, but not tonight alright?” “Alright we will tho soon. Let’s head out to the venue.” She said heading the door. “Yea lets do this” I said in a small voice. She is right there is more, but after tonight I am wiping the slate clean moving on from all of this with a new me with in my heart, and soul.

I stepped down out of the bus to head over seeing Jack standing there. “Hey guys looking good.” He said coming over hugging Shy. “Yea thanks Jack looking not to shabby as always” She returned his compliments before letting him go heading for the venue. “Hey Shay I wanted to talk quick you mind?” He asked in a unsure small voice. “Sure what’s on your mind Hun?” I said walking for the venue. “I’m sorry for how rough I was with you last night I know I shouldn’t have done that to you.” He said ashamed. “Jack its fine we were drunk we did something we almost did 3 times so don’t worry about it I know I wasn’t much better suggesting it but what I said still stands. When I say my speech before set I need you to listen to me alright?” “Alright umm I have to ask tho why do all you did last night just to say goodbye.?”he said.
“My speech will tell all tonight Jack.” I said walking into SC’s green room shutting the door before he could come in.

I moved my ear to the door listening to see if he was still there nothing sweet. I opened the door heading to side stage since I was up first.
“5 minutes Shay everyone get in place.” Show time. “Alright I’m here just like you asked.” Jack said coming up next to me. “Thank you.” “Anytime Hun. Good luck.” He said giving me a hug holding onto me more than he should. “30 seconds.” Was called. “I have to get in place.” I said pulling away. “Alright everyone, but Shay head out.” Tyler called. I watched as Shy, and the others helping tonight ran out. “Okay Shay go.” I ran out to the mic stand grabbing my wireless mic off the stand. “Hey everyone so before we start I have something to say Tonight is about starting a new wiping the slate starting my new life doing it over the right way over the last few months I’ve had this love hate relationship, but this first song is about how neither of us are winning its like a game its sad so I told him how I feel and as of tonight I wiped the slate clean I’ll admit I never believed in love, but I’m starting to. So this first song is Nobody wins.” (Credits to The Veronicas)
Hold your head up high
You're never wrong
Somewhere in the right you belong
You would rather fight than walk away
What a lonely way to breathe the air
What an unlovely way to say you care
Now we're too far gone for me to save
And I never thought that we'd come to this



*I looked at Jack sadly before walking to Shy leaning on her*

Maybe there's beauty in goodbye
(no one's wrong or right, you would rather fight, then you walk away)
There's just no reason left to try
(now it's gone too far, look at where we are)
You push me away
Another black day
Let's count up the reasons to cry
Look what you've missed, living like this
Nobody wins (nobody wins)

Searching for the truth in your eyes
Found myself so lost don't recognize
The person now that you, you claim to be
Don't know when to stop, or where to start
You're just so caught up in who you are
Now you're far too high for me to see
I'd never thought that we'd come to this

Maybe there's beauty in goodbye
(no one's wrong or right, you're about fly, then you walk away)
There's just no reason left to try
(now it's gone too far, look at where we are)
You push me away
Another black day
Let's count up the reasons to cry
Look what you've missed, living like this
Nobody wins (nobody wins)

*was tearing up as I went into the bridge staring side stage at Jack*

You never say you're sorry
Try to tell me that you love me
But don't - it's too late to take it there

Maybe there's beauty in goodbye
(no one's wrong or right, you're about fly, then you walk away)
There's just no reason left to try
(now it's gone too far, look at where we are)
You push me away
Another black day
Let's count up the reasons to cry
Look what you've missed, living like this
Nobody wins

(Now it's gone too far, look at where we are)

Nobody wins

I walked over to the grand piano sitting down setting the mic on the little stand this was one I was doing on my own for the first bit before it really gets going (credits to Shiloh)
You say that I should watch my mouth, that everything is not a joke
I'm not the kind to hold my tongue I'd rather speak my mind than...

Choke on the words that you want me to say
Smile as the honesty fades away
Say the right words, be the good girl
Play along, is that what you want?

*I got up from the piano walking back to center stage as Shy took a seat at the piano.*

Honestly it's not me, it's not me, it's not me
Can't you see what you want me to be, what you want me to be
It's just not me

You say that I should let it go, and break the key to lock the door
Just close my eyes to what I know, but I can't take it any more

Than the words that you want me to say
Why let my honesty fade away
Say the right words, be the good girl
Play along, is that what you want?

Honestly it's not me, it's not me, it's not me
Can't you see what you want me to be, what you want me to be
It's just not me

So choke on the words that you want me to say
Smile as your honesty fades away
Say the right words, be the good girl
Play along, if that's what you want

“This next song goes out to anyone who’s father walked out of their lives who may not have grown up according to his plan when all you ever did was to make him proud. This song was made for my Step Dad who I wish would have supported me never disowned me a few months ago he was the only father I ever had for 18 years, but because I followed my dreams not his I was disowned by him I just want him to know I still love him I hope he hears this song one day, and I hope I make him proud this song is called perfect” (Credits to Simple Plan)Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just wanna make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
Can't pretend that
I'm alright
And you can't change me

'Cause we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just wanna make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright

'Cause we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again (right again)
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand (you don't understand)

'Cause we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

'Cause we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
“Can someone bring me my acoustic? This next song goes to someone who I thought was special to me hell this one is kinda of special, but this is the guy I parted ways with” I said as I was handed my acoustic. (Credits to Avril Lavigne)
When you're falling, you're crashing
When your fire has turned to ashes
When you're screaming, your heart is bleeding
When you're feeling like there's no reason
I won't let you go
No I, I won't let you go

'Cause when you're all alone and it's cold and there's no one to hold
When you're feeling lost, and there's nowhere, there's nowhere to go
When you're feeling sad, don't forget you can reach for my hand
When you're feeling down just remember I won't let you go
I won't let you go (I won't let you go)
I won't let you go
I won't let you go (I won't let you go)

When you're torn down, when you're messed up
Don't you give in, no don't you give up
When you're drowning, and you're fading
Always know that I'm always waiting
And I, I won't let you go
No, I won't let you go

'Cause when you're all alone and it's cold and there's no one to hold
When you're feeling lost, and there's nowhere, there's nowhere to go
When you're feeling sad, don't forget you can reach for my hand
When you're feeling down just remember, remember, remember

When I said forever
I know that I meant forever
And I won't let you down
I can always be found
And I'm always around

When you're all alone, it's cold, there's no one to hold
When you're feeling lost, and there's nowhere, nowhere

When you're feeling sad, don't forget you can reach for my hand
When you're feeling down just remember I won't let you go
I won't let you go (I won't let you go)
I won't let you go
I won't let you go (I won't let you go)
Won't let you go

I kept my acoustic and got ready for the next song. “This song was made about my ex finacee the man over a year ago that tore me in two, how the guy I prated ways with fixed me, but our road was broken by my ex. This is broken road.” (credits to 12 Stones. Broken Road)
Time, moves slowly while you're gone
I haven't heard your voice in quite some time
But I still see your face
I cannot erase the things you've done
And all the ways you kept me hangin' on

Now your gone
I've moved on
And I don't feel so sorry
Can't you see I'm bleeding
But I won't bleed anymore
I've held on
For so long
But I had to let you go
At the end of our broken road

I know, it hurts to hear the truth
Well maybe
I was never meant to be with you
And I cannot replace
The tears of disgrace
That run for you
'Cause running from the truth is what you do

Now your gone
I've moved on
And I don't feel so sorry
Can't you see I'm bleeding
But I won't bleed anymore
I've held on
For so long
But I had to let you go
At the end of our broken road

You were all I've ever known
And I cannot replace all these tears of disgrace
And I won't bleed for you anymore

Now your gone
I've moved on
And I don't feel so sorry
Can't you see I'm bleeding
But I won't bleed anymore
I've held on
For so long
But I had to let you go
At the end of our broken road

And I won't bleed for you anymore
I've moved on
And I won't bleed for you anymore
I'm bleeding but I won't bleed anymore

I've held on
For so long
But I have to let you go
At the end of our broken road

“Alright guys we are going to bring it back up for my last two songs. This next one is Let Me Go” (Credits to 3 Doors Down)
One more kiss could be the best thing
But one more lie could be the worst
And all these thoughts are never resting
And you're not something I deserve

In my head there's only you now
This world falls on me
In this world there's real and make believe
And this seems real to me

[Chorus]
You love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
And you love me but you don't know who I am
So let me go
Let me go

I dream ahead to what I hope for
And I turn my back on loving you
How can this love be a good thing
When I know what I'm goin through

In my head there's only you now
This world falls on me
In this world there's real and make believe
And this seems real to me

[Chorus]
You love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
You love me but you don't know who I am
So let me go
Just Let me go...
Let me go

And no matter how hard I try
I can't escape these things inside I know
I knowww..
When all the pieces fall apart
You will be the only one who knows
Who knows

[Chorus]
You love me but you don't know who I am
I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand
And you love me but you don't know Who I am
So let me go
Just let me go

And you love me but you don't
You love me but you don't
You love me but you don't know who I am
And you love me but you don't
You love me but you don't
You love me but you don't know me

“This is my last song and well its time to take it up a fair bit” I said putting my acoustic in the extra stand I had for it. “Alright this was one of my favorites to write its so true this is why we parted ways this is such a hard song to sing I’m so addicted to him the worst way so now its over this is I can’t stay away.” (Credits to the veronica’s)

This is wrong
I should be gone
Yet here we lay
'Cause I can't stay away

Roses bloom
In your dirty room
I come to play
'Cause I can't stay away
No I can't stay away-ay

I'm conflicted
I inhale now I'm addicted
To this place
To you babe
I can't stay away
Can't stay away
We get up, we go down
Then we go one more round
It's wrong, they say
I can't stay a- I can't stay away
No I can't stay a- I can't stay away

I was numb
For you I come
Night and day
And I can't stay away
No I can't stay away

I'm conflicted
I inhale now I'm addicted
To this place
To you babe
I can't stay away
Can't stay away
We get up, we go down
Then we go one more round
It's wrong, they say
I can't stay a- I can't stay away
No I can't stay a- I can't stay away

I wish I could
Leave and never return
Baby, I know I should
But for you I'd burn

Stay away
'Cause I can't stay away-ay

I'm conflicted
I inhale now I'm addicted
To this place
To you babe
I can't stay away
Can't stay away
We get up, we go down
Then we go one more round
It's wrong, they say
I can't stay a- I can't stay away
No I can't stay a- I can't stay away

I can't stay away
I can't stay away
I can't stay away
I can't stay away

“Alright everyone that’s it for me thank you so much for having all of us Brighton.”
I said walking off stage to wait for ATl to call me up since they were up now.

Notes