My Only One (Jalex)

Jack's POV:

Finals were two days away and I've done nothing but revise my ass off. Alex had been helping me to the best of his ability, for saying he was a headteacher, his mathematical skills were somewhat lacking and that was what I was struggling on most. I'd set myself up at the breakfast bar in Alex's kitchen, my books sprawled out all over the surface, a notebook in front of me.
"5x - 6 = 3x - 8...I don't fucking know."
I groaned, slamming my head down on top of the books. Alex had gone to the supermarket to get food so I was completely alone. I'd tried to put some music on to try and help me relax more but all it did was distract me. I was screwed. I had the exams that determine my future in two days and I can't do simple equations.

I'd been getting myself so worked up over this. I wasn't sleeping, I wasn't eating and I couldn't focus on anything else but my exams. I was even treating Alex like shit and, as much as I despised myself for doing so, I couldn't stop it. I was snapping at him when he was trying to help me. It'd got to the point that I was so pissed off at myself for treating him horribly that I just ignored him completely: if I couldn't be nice to him, I wouldn't talk to him at all. I hated myself for what I'd become in the space of just a few days. The only school subject that came naturally to me was music, all the others I had to work at. I got decent enough grades but I had to work my ass off to get them. I wish I could be like Alex...I wanted to be like Alex. I wanted to be able to understand most things instantly, I wanted to be able to sing like him, I wanted to be as nice as he always is. I was jealous of how perfect he is. I honestly don't know what he sees in me.

"You wanna know what I see in you, Jay? Well, okay then..."
I was so caught up in my own thoughts, I didn't hear Alex enter the house with his arms full of shopping. I didn't hear the front door open and close, I didn't hear him actually come into the kitchen and dump the bags of food on the table.
"Wait...how did you-"
"Your mom told me. I often see her around you, she's been with you non-stop these past few days."
I had completely forgotten that Alex was a medium, him not really mentioning it since my mom's funeral.
"But, I thought you said that they only come back when they feel like they're needed."
"Yeah, and that's true. She felt like she needed to be with her baby boy, Jay. She's trying to help you but, for obvious reasons, she can't."
"Oh."
It's all I could say. I thought I'd seen shadows moving in the house but I just put it down to the lack of sleep and the copious amounts of energy drink I'd consumed in an attempt to keep me awake.
"Anyway, you wanted to know what I see in you? Well, Jay, you're beautiful. Your personality is so beautiful too, you're so funny and you never fail to make people laugh. You've gone through so much and just look at where you are now. You're the happiest you've ever been and it shows. You've come out of the other side a better, stronger person. You're so supportive. You complete me, Jay, and my life wouldn't be worth living if you weren't around. I love you so much and I don't ever want to lose you."
By the end of Alex's little monologue, I was crying. Tears were streaming down my face, blurring my vision. I felt a strong pair of arms wrap around my body and lift me up. Alex carried me bridal style into the lounge, setting me down in his lap on the sofa.

I'd cried and cried and cried. I didn't realise I was holding in so much emotion. I let it all out, crying into Alex's chest, my tears soaking his shirt. Once my sobs had subsided into sniffles, Alex moved me so I was sat straddling him. He held my face in both of his hands and kissed me. It was one of the best kisses I'd had in a while- I could just feel the love from him. I pulled away first, feeling the need to apologise for my behaviour.
"Lex, I'm so sorry for treating you like shit these past few days. I didn't mean it, honest. I hate myself for the way I've been treating you and you don't deserve that, especially not after everything you've done for me. I really am so fucking sorry."
Alex leaned in again and kissed me, a little harder this time.
"Jay, don't worry about that. I totally understand how you're feeling, I was the same. I hated everyone, I was snapping at literally everyone too."
"It still doesn't make it okay though, Lex. I shouldn't be treating the man I love like that...maybe I should just go."
"What? No, you're not leaving, Jay. No way."
"But...I keep snapping at you and that's not fair. If I'm not snapping at you, I'm not even talking to you. I'm not being a very good boyfriend and you deserve better."
"Jack...please, don't. Don't even think like that. I understand what it's like, honest, I do. I'm not mad at you at all, not in the slightest."
"But, you've been pissed off with me. I can tell."
"Yeah, slightly, but not because of the reason you're thinking of. I was pissed with you because you're not eating or sleeping and you wouldn't listen to me when I told you to go to bed and give it a break."
"I needed to study though."
"True, but not at 3am."
My mouth kept opening and closing. I didn't know what to say in response. Alex was right, but my stubbornness was holding me back from admitting it. I felt myself being pulled into Alex's body once again. I buried my head in the crook of his neck, taking in his scent.
"I'm sorry, Lex. I love you."
"I love you too. You're not doubting our relationship though, are you?"
"What? Of course not, Lex. Why would I give up the man who's made me the happiest I've ever been in my entire life?"
"I don't know, Jay."
I kissed Alex again, the emotion completely different.

We continued to sloppily make out on the sofa, the kiss never breaking, despite how much my lungs were protesting.
"Come on, you need to loosed up. We're gonna try something new today, something I've always wanted to do."
"Hmm, okay."
Alex picked me up, his hands on my ass, squeezing every now and then. He carried me to the bathroom, only breaking the kiss whilst we were on the stairs. Alex set me down on the tiled bathroom floor with a slight thud. He went over to the shower and tuned it on, turning the dial to his preferred temperature. I stood there dumbfounded, my semi kind of visible in my tight jeans, I could see Alex was a little turned on too. Alex started to rid himself of his clothes, leaving them in a pile on the floor. I was still incredibly confused as to what was going on.
"Unless you want to get into the shower fully clothed, you might wanna take them off, Jay."
"Oh, yeah, I get it now."
I quickly got my clothes off, almost falling flat on my face whilst trying to wriggle out of my jeans.
"What exactly are we doing, Lex? I'm getting hard and seeing you naked and soon to be soaked, is not going to help."
"Have you ever wanted to have sex in the shower?"
"Well, yeah, I've thought about it but I don't exactly want to end up on one of those embarrassing programs about sex related injuries."
"Don't worry, we won't. Come on, it'll be fun."
"Fuck it, okay."
Alex smiled, more like smirked, and bent down to his discarded jeans, pulling out a condom.
"No, Lex. I wan't you and only you."
Alex bit his lip and looked at me, silently asking me if I was sure. I walked up to him, took the condom out of his hand and tossed it over my shoulder. I connected our lips, my hands making their way to his hair. If I was honest, I was kind of scared but it was the type of fear that made you feel excited too. I wanted this more than anything right now.
"Come on, before the water gets cold," I mumbled against Alex's lips.

We both climbed into the shower, the spray of the warm water feeling really good.
"Bend over, Jay. Put your hands on the wall or something."
I did as Alex asked, bending over against the back wall of the shower so the water was cascading over Alex.
"Ready?"
"Yep."
I felt one finger slowly push into me. It was uncomfortable but nowhere near as much as the time before. Alex sensed that I was a lot less tense this time and started to move his finger instantly, curling it and pumping in and out of me.
"Another, Lex."
I could feel myself getting harder as Alex pushed the second finger in, scissoring and curling them not long afterwards. His finger brushed against that one spot again, making me arch my back, a moan escaping from my throat. Alex was right, I did need to take a break and this was the perfect way to do so.
"Ready for the third, Jay?"
"Yeah, go for it."
The third finger was a little bit of a stretch, the familiar burning sensation ripping through my lower half once more, making my knees weaken. I nodded once I felt like I could take some more. Alex's spare hand came to rest on the bottom of my back, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into my damp skin. His fingers curled inside me, making me arch my back from the pleasure that was replacing the pain. Alex started to pump his fingers, twisting them to make sure that I was properly stretched out.
"I'm ready, Lex. I need you."
I felt Alex pull out of me. I felt empty. In a way, I missed the slight twinge of pain. It was actually kind of nice. I heard Alex moaning behind me, only turning me on more.

I felt him at my entrance. I was silently willing him to just slam into me, to skip the agonisingly slow start but I knew it would hurt like hell and, in a way, being teased was a massive turn on for me.
"Lex, go, please."
Alex made some sort of noise in response, a combination of both a moan and a grunt. I felt him push into me, both of us moaning in unison. I arched my back, pushing further back onto Alex. I needed to feel more.
"Lex...faster"
Without hesitation, Alex pulled virtually all the way out and slammed back into me, hitting that one spot head on, making me scream out in pleasure.
"Fuck, Lex. Right there, oh my God!"
Alex moaned, slamming into me again. He was right, sex in the shower was amazing.
"You're so tight, Jay, so fucking tight."
"I'm c-close, Lex."
"Me too, Ja-ay."
Alex's thrusts were getting sloppier, his rhythm slacking. Alex's hand wrapped around my leaking dick, pumping in time with his thrusts. I felt my stomach drop, an insane rush of pleasure cursing through my veins.
"Al-lex, oh my fuck."
I came in Alex's hand, my muscles clenching.
"Shit, Jay, ahh fuck."
I felt Alex come inside me, making me moan at the unique and amazing sensation. Alex rode out both of our orgasms before pulling out. I stood up straight and spun around to meet Alex. I kissed him softly, my hands going to his hair once again.
"Thank you, Lex. I love you," I whispered against his lips.
"I love you too, Jay."

Notes

Hi,

Firstly, I'd like to apologise for the shittiness of this chapter, I'm not particularly proud of it but given my current state of mind, it was the best I could do. I'm sorry.
Secondly, thank you for getting this second on the popular page, the last time I checked anyway, it means a lot.

I found this and now I'm sobbing so yay Therapy Speech Compilation

Thanks,
Em x