Dear María
I Think I Saw You In My Sleep
We were in the beach. Jack and I were helping each other put on the suncream after helping our son, Jack put a ton of suncream on the tip of my nose and started to laugh, I stuck my tongue out and he crashed our lips together, biting my tongue in the process. The kiss didn’t last long, but it was filled with love and happiness, we pulled away and I felt myself blush when I saw Jack’s smirk. Then something cold touched my skin.
I turned to see our soon, who just got water between his hands and threw it at us, laughing. He ran to the water, screaming happily whilst Jack and I just laughed. I couldn’t see his face, but I saw his dark brown hair with faint blonde highlights bouncing with every step he took, and his pale skin shining.
“Come on! I wanna swim with the sharks!” he screamed in a cute and childish voice.
“You shouldn’t have made him watch Jaws with you, Jack” I chuckled.
“I wanted to scare him, not encourage him!” he laughed.
“Well, you know our kid is not exactly normal” I hugged him and buried my head in his chest.
He looked down on me and moved his face closer to mine, just when we were about to kiss again, our son called us.
“Ew! Do that when we get home, please!” he gagged, “Now, come on! The sharks are waiting!” he grabbed my hand and lead me to the shore. Jack following us, laughing.
Our son let go of my hand and walked into the water, slightly raising his elbows as the water was cold, and suddenly dived in and started to swim around. I felt Jack’s arms around my waist.
“I love you, baby” he cooed in my ear.
“I love you too” I turned to face him and he kissed me lovingly.
I woke up screaming with tears in my eyes and ran out of the room. I didn’t know where to go so I stopped against a wall and pressed my body against it, my hands next to my head whilst tear started to run down my cheeks. I punched the wall, crying uncontrollably, when I took a deep breath and turned around, my back against the wall and tried to take deep breaths. I couldn’t help but cry harder, remembering how happy we looked in my dream-slash-nightmare. I started to shake, everytime a bit harder and put a hand over my mouth to keep my sobs from escaping my lips.
I went downstairs and started to open cupboards until I found my bottle of whiskey, which Jack put there so I wouldn’t try anything ‘strange’. I opened the bottle and started to drink until I felt the burning sensation fill my entire stomach.
I stumbled helplessly around the house, banging my body against random places when Jack’s suggestion popped in my head.
Stella.
I got my phone, the bottle and grabbed the car keys. I couldn’t stay in that house, the walls where whispering things and wouldn’t let me think straight (although that was maybe my drunk brain). I know that drunk and car aren’t words that really go together, but I’d never had a drunk-car accident in my life, and you know how many trips I’ve done to the equestrian center.
I drove, or tried, to the equestrian center and looked for a place I could climb. No luck. I saw a tree which had a long and thick branch going to the wall and climbed it. Climbing drunk is the most difficult thing in the world, but once you’ve got used to it, it takes two seconds to jump over the wall.
I walked down the branch and jumped on the concrete and my legs lead me to Stella’s paddock, taking sips from the bottle every now and then.
I entered the paddock and she instantly got up and trotted to me. I hugged her tightly and explained her everything.
“I saw him in my sleep” I whispered, afraid I’d be dragged to a real nightmare if I spoke any louder, her neck around me tensed and relaxed, like giving me a tight squeeze.
She sat (or kind of laid down but not completely) next to me and I leaned my body against her tummy, looking up at the stars.
STELLA’S POV
As soon as I saw a stumbling and blonde figure walking to my paddock I knew it was María. Where was Jack? Most importantly, why did she smell like she was about to have her period? Wasn’t she pregnant? All of my questions were answered when she opened that pretty little mouth of hers, shaking and crying and drinking every two sentences she said. I hated seeing her like this.
I was fuming at Mikel. Just get near her when she’s next to me and I’ll fucking break all your bones, you ass.
And Jack. Oh, Jack, how dare he leave her like that? Yes, he’s become my friend, actually my best friend, over the past year, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna let him leave María without a good reason.
María was now sleeping, using my back as the matress and my neck as some sort of pillow, her arms hanging at each side and her legs at each side of my tummy, like she had fallen asleep riding me bareback.
“Stella, calm down it’s not-“ Ladrón started.
“Shut up, Ladrón just shut up” I turned to him and sent him a death glare.
“Just don’t take it too personally” he raised a front leg and stretched it and did the same with his other leg, shrugging.
“Too personally? Pardon me but whatever happens to my owner, it affects me, so fuck you and your opinion. Anyways who asked you?”
“Hmm, I…”
“Exactly, now will you shut up, or do I need to wake her up to kick your face?” he shook his head slightly and started to walk in small circles in his paddock. He suddenly stopped and walked to the fence between our paddocks again.
“What’s up with her? It’s not like she’s the only who has a bad day” he laughed, shaking his head. “Quit with the death glares”
I shook my body a bit and María fell nicely on a clean pile of straw next to us, still asleep. I stood up and walked to the fence, pinning my ears back. Ladrón took some steps back.
“Look, you’re clearly too stupid to understand, so why don’t you go just go fuck a tree or something?” I spat.
“I prefer fucking you” he winked.
“Whatever” I shook my head in disgust, “I’m done talking to a loser” I turned around and he bit my ass and I used my braided tail (which felt a bit heavy) and hit him.
“Fuck!” he backed away. I hit him just in his eyes. Oops.
“If you learnt to shut up this wouldn’t have happened” I turned back to the figure on the straw and squatted next to her.
She felt my body heat and moved up to my back again, leaving the bottle on the straw. I slowly got up and got the bottle with my teeth, and walked to the entrance of the paddock, where there was a big trash can two metres away from the entrance. I did my small calculations and threw the bottle. It landed perfectly into the bin.
I turned and walked to the center of the paddock and squatted again, María’s limp body on top of me.
I hope she decides to go for a ride tomorrow, she’s starting to lose her selfconfidence again.
I turned to see our soon, who just got water between his hands and threw it at us, laughing. He ran to the water, screaming happily whilst Jack and I just laughed. I couldn’t see his face, but I saw his dark brown hair with faint blonde highlights bouncing with every step he took, and his pale skin shining.
“Come on! I wanna swim with the sharks!” he screamed in a cute and childish voice.
“You shouldn’t have made him watch Jaws with you, Jack” I chuckled.
“I wanted to scare him, not encourage him!” he laughed.
“Well, you know our kid is not exactly normal” I hugged him and buried my head in his chest.
He looked down on me and moved his face closer to mine, just when we were about to kiss again, our son called us.
“Ew! Do that when we get home, please!” he gagged, “Now, come on! The sharks are waiting!” he grabbed my hand and lead me to the shore. Jack following us, laughing.
Our son let go of my hand and walked into the water, slightly raising his elbows as the water was cold, and suddenly dived in and started to swim around. I felt Jack’s arms around my waist.
“I love you, baby” he cooed in my ear.
“I love you too” I turned to face him and he kissed me lovingly.
I woke up screaming with tears in my eyes and ran out of the room. I didn’t know where to go so I stopped against a wall and pressed my body against it, my hands next to my head whilst tear started to run down my cheeks. I punched the wall, crying uncontrollably, when I took a deep breath and turned around, my back against the wall and tried to take deep breaths. I couldn’t help but cry harder, remembering how happy we looked in my dream-slash-nightmare. I started to shake, everytime a bit harder and put a hand over my mouth to keep my sobs from escaping my lips.
I went downstairs and started to open cupboards until I found my bottle of whiskey, which Jack put there so I wouldn’t try anything ‘strange’. I opened the bottle and started to drink until I felt the burning sensation fill my entire stomach.
I stumbled helplessly around the house, banging my body against random places when Jack’s suggestion popped in my head.
Stella.
I got my phone, the bottle and grabbed the car keys. I couldn’t stay in that house, the walls where whispering things and wouldn’t let me think straight (although that was maybe my drunk brain). I know that drunk and car aren’t words that really go together, but I’d never had a drunk-car accident in my life, and you know how many trips I’ve done to the equestrian center.
I drove, or tried, to the equestrian center and looked for a place I could climb. No luck. I saw a tree which had a long and thick branch going to the wall and climbed it. Climbing drunk is the most difficult thing in the world, but once you’ve got used to it, it takes two seconds to jump over the wall.
I walked down the branch and jumped on the concrete and my legs lead me to Stella’s paddock, taking sips from the bottle every now and then.
I entered the paddock and she instantly got up and trotted to me. I hugged her tightly and explained her everything.
“I saw him in my sleep” I whispered, afraid I’d be dragged to a real nightmare if I spoke any louder, her neck around me tensed and relaxed, like giving me a tight squeeze.
She sat (or kind of laid down but not completely) next to me and I leaned my body against her tummy, looking up at the stars.
STELLA’S POV
As soon as I saw a stumbling and blonde figure walking to my paddock I knew it was María. Where was Jack? Most importantly, why did she smell like she was about to have her period? Wasn’t she pregnant? All of my questions were answered when she opened that pretty little mouth of hers, shaking and crying and drinking every two sentences she said. I hated seeing her like this.
I was fuming at Mikel. Just get near her when she’s next to me and I’ll fucking break all your bones, you ass.
And Jack. Oh, Jack, how dare he leave her like that? Yes, he’s become my friend, actually my best friend, over the past year, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna let him leave María without a good reason.
María was now sleeping, using my back as the matress and my neck as some sort of pillow, her arms hanging at each side and her legs at each side of my tummy, like she had fallen asleep riding me bareback.
“Stella, calm down it’s not-“ Ladrón started.
“Shut up, Ladrón just shut up” I turned to him and sent him a death glare.
“Just don’t take it too personally” he raised a front leg and stretched it and did the same with his other leg, shrugging.
“Too personally? Pardon me but whatever happens to my owner, it affects me, so fuck you and your opinion. Anyways who asked you?”
“Hmm, I…”
“Exactly, now will you shut up, or do I need to wake her up to kick your face?” he shook his head slightly and started to walk in small circles in his paddock. He suddenly stopped and walked to the fence between our paddocks again.
“What’s up with her? It’s not like she’s the only who has a bad day” he laughed, shaking his head. “Quit with the death glares”
I shook my body a bit and María fell nicely on a clean pile of straw next to us, still asleep. I stood up and walked to the fence, pinning my ears back. Ladrón took some steps back.
“Look, you’re clearly too stupid to understand, so why don’t you go just go fuck a tree or something?” I spat.
“I prefer fucking you” he winked.
“Whatever” I shook my head in disgust, “I’m done talking to a loser” I turned around and he bit my ass and I used my braided tail (which felt a bit heavy) and hit him.
“Fuck!” he backed away. I hit him just in his eyes. Oops.
“If you learnt to shut up this wouldn’t have happened” I turned back to the figure on the straw and squatted next to her.
She felt my body heat and moved up to my back again, leaving the bottle on the straw. I slowly got up and got the bottle with my teeth, and walked to the entrance of the paddock, where there was a big trash can two metres away from the entrance. I did my small calculations and threw the bottle. It landed perfectly into the bin.
I turned and walked to the center of the paddock and squatted again, María’s limp body on top of me.
I hope she decides to go for a ride tomorrow, she’s starting to lose her selfconfidence again.
Notes
Alright so I took my time because I wanted to do until before Stella's POV, but it seemed too short, so I added her POV.
It's been a while since she had voiced her opinion on things, directly, so why not?
Thankyou for those almost 9,000 views!
By the way, i'm putting the trigger warning sign, just in case someone gets easily triggered, although I doubt that, but... just in case.
BY THE WAY, we're getting to the big stuff now :D
What do you guys think or want to happen?
I already have it planned, but I'll see if I can add some extra stuff so I don't write so little and you guys enjoy it more :D
Yes, I changed my username.
Title credit: Such Small Hands by La Dispute.
@yeah nah
thankyou so much for your support C: i'll update as soon as this writer's block dims a little
2/16/15