Jack's POV

As I ran out of the bathroom, questions flooded into my mind.

Did he really mean what he said?

Does he actually care?

Should I forgive him?

What if he breaks my heart again?

I shook my head and began to feel tears falling onto my cheeks. Making my way out of the school, I realized it was lunch period. I moved through the many students in the courtyard area to reach the student parking lot. On the way I ran into one of my good friends, Matt Flyzik.

"Hey Jack." Matt beamed at me with the happy smile he always had.

"Oh hi." I said softly, attempting to wipe away my tears before he saw.

"What's wrong, Jack?" Too late. I thought and sighed softly.

"Nothing really. I just have a lot to think about. I actually have to go." I lied and gave him a small smile.

"Okay, well call me if you need anything." He said with an unsure nod and gave me a caring look before walking over to a lunch table with a few of our friends.

I didn't know what I was doing or where I was going. I just wanted to leave school. The problem was, my car broke down last week so I couldn't drive myself anywhere, hence the reason why I had to take the bus. I knew Alex always had his car on campus because he would leave in his lunch period.

Running a hand through my hair, I pulled my phone out and noticed I had a few unread texts from Alex.

I'm sorry.-Alex

Please forgive me.-Alex

Can we talk later?-Alex

The tears began to flow again and I sat on the curb of the parking lot. Fuck, why did he have to mess with my emotions like this?! So much of me wanted to just take him back and hug him but there was still that part that told me I shouldn't. I couldn't survive another heartbreak. I was already suicidal. I constantly thought about killing myself and how no one would care.

I unlocked my phone and sent a text to Alex:

Hey, would you mind going off campus with me for lunch period? I think we should talk.-Jack

I hoped he would say yes. I hoped with all of my heart that I could laugh with the perfect boy again. There I go again. Calling him perfect. I really need to stop with that. I thought as my phone buzzed on the sidewalk. I sighed in relief when Alex agreed and told me he would be out in a minute.

As I sat waiting, I had no idea how this would work out. This boy had made my life a living hell for over a year. It was hard to tell if he was actually changed. What if he was doing this so he could get close with me again and break my heart so his friends and him could have a good laugh? I brushed a strand of hair from my face and felt a hand on my shoulder.

My first reaction was to jump up and prepare my body for another physical attack. Instead, when I jumped up Alex backed up and put his hands up in a surrending pose. His eyes were soft and caring like the old Alex I knew. I just wanted to cuddle with him and kiss him. Snap out of it Jack. Now. I told myself as I looked at Alex intently.

"Woah man. I'm not going to hit you." Alex said as he glanced over my shaking body.

"Well, I'm not sure if I believe you anymore." I snapped back as I looked into Alex's eyes. He appeared to have a bit of hurt in them and I just wanted to laugh. He deserved to feel hurt. If only he knew what I had been put through since he left me.

"Look, Jack, I know what I did was wrong but-"

"No! I'm so sick of hearing shitty apollogies. It's not like anyone actually fucking cares anymore! My own fucking father hits me because apparently I'm not good enough in his eyes! Then there's you. Oh, you. You have no idea the fucking suffering you put me through. No. Fucking. Idea." I growled as I watched Alex's expression change from happy to guilty.

In an instant, I had both of me sleeves rolled up so my scars were visible. Tears began to flow again as I looked at them and remembered every single one of them. Every single painful fucking memory.

"You see these, Alex? These are what your fucking "jokes" caused. Every single remark you made. All of them forced me to not feel like I'm enough. So, while you and your stupid dumbass friends were laughing thinking it was hilarious, I'm over here wanting to die. How do you feel now, Alex? How do you feel knowing you caused these?" I motioned towards my scars and felt sobs coming on.

Alex was speechless. He tried to speak many times but apparently couldn't find the right words. Sobs coarsed through my body and I fell to my knees. I hugged my knees to my chest and cried. Alex dropped down next to me and laid a hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Jack. I don't know what happened. My life just fell apart in front of me so I turned to something to distract me from it."

I looked at Alex and laughed a bit.

"Your life fell apart?! My fucking father beats me and I had to, and still do, put up with torment from you and your buddies. I still don't think you realize how much you have impacted my life, Alex. I used to be happy despite my family issues. I was happy because I thought someone actaully cared about me for once in my life. Oh, but I was wrong. So wrong."

Alex looked at me, his mouth a thin line.

"Okay, I know you probably won't forgive me. I understand that. I was an ass for a long time. I get it. I just wish I realized earlier that I was being really fucking stupid. I wish I knew how much I made you hurt. I just want you to know how much I regret every second of what I did. I know you probably won't believe me and I don't blame you. Just please think about it. I really miss hanging out with you. I miss sitting on the couch and watching Home Alone over and over again. I miss you, Jack." He said with clear emotion in his voice.

A small smile found its way onto my mouth and I brought Alex in for a tight hug.

"Do you promise that you mean what you said?" I asked, still a bit hesistant on bringing Alex back into my life.

"Every. Fucking. Word." He said with that smile that I could die from.

I giggled softly and stood up, wiping the tears off of my face.

"Could we maybe go get some food and not come back to school?" I asked with a childish grin.

"Sounds wodnerful to me." Alex said with a smile and walked with me over to his car.

It felt amazing sitting in the passenger seat of his car again. All the long nights we spent driving in here. All the memories that I tried to forget. Was I really ready to take this boy back into my life?

Alex started the car and Blink began blasting and I smiled. Blink 182 was both Alex and I's favorite band. I missed the nights we would sit out and just lay next to each other listening to Blink. Those were the best nights of my life. In those moments, I felt like all my problems were gone. I felt like I had a great life.

"Alex?"

"Yes?"

"Please don't hurt me again. I can't deal with that all over again." I said honestly as I kept my gaze locked on the road.

"I promise I won't. I want you back in my life Jack. And I mean it this time."